The document describes different national soccer plans in a humorous way. The English plan varies the striker's position depending on wind. The German plan is radical and efficient, with balls reaching 297 km/h. The Italian plan focuses on defense, limited creativity in midfield, and passing to the striker and potentially penalties. The Brazilian plan requires no comment. The Swiss plan sees them lose on their own without needing help. The French plan tries all hypotheses but forgets the goal. The American plan mistakes the referee for the ball. The Romanian plan is to stay home and watch others on TV.