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Bridging the Pleasure Gap
A Closer Look at Sexual Satisfaction
Tyomi Morgan-Najieb
Certified Sexologist, Sex Blogger, Pleasure Coach,
Erotic Content Creator.
My Accomplishments in
Sexual Health
• Launched Glamerotica101.com in 2011 to focus on female sexual empowerment for
women, black women specifically. (Blogger)

• Create sex positive spaces for people to discuss sexuality and expand their
experience safely. (Events)

• Frequent sexual health contributor to podcasts, radio shows and publications.
(Media) (Ebony Magazine, blackdoctor.org, Huffington Post, NYT, TheLily)

• Award winning Producer of erotica and sexual health video content. (Youtube)
(Featured on Comedy Central) (Viral) 

• Social Media Sex Influencer leading conversations through Twitter and Instagram***

• Pro Choice advocate and activist. (Host of All Access Chicago 2016 and PPIL
Generations event 2017)

• Seminar Coordinator and Resident for the Exxxotica Expo.
My Demographics
Data collected from Social Media
• Core demo age: Youtube: 18-34 Instagram: 25-44

• Gender: Youtube: 51.2% Male, 48.8% Female Twitter:
66% Male 34% Female Instagram: 51% Women 49%
Men

• Most in Heteronormative relationships or subscribe to
heteronormative behaviors.

• Over Half of my core demographic is single (18-35).
What is the Pleasure Gap?
• Discontent with erotic experiences. 

• Limited awareness of what is considered pleasurable. 

• Disconnect from Partner’s Pleasure.

• Originates from Orgasm-Based sexual programming.

• What has sparked this conversation: The Gender orgasm gap. In 2009,
the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior (NSSHB) asked 1,931
U.S. adults ages 18 to 59 about their most recent sexual experience. The
topline findings show that men are more likely to orgasm than women — 91
percent of men said they climaxed during their last sexual encounter,
compared with 64 percent of women
Are Americans Satisfied
With Their Sex Lives?
• Short Answer: HELL NO!!!

Glamerotica101 Stats:

• The average person in a partnered relationship feels short
changed sexually.

• Of 1,098 people polled on 9/2/2019, 43% are unsatisfied
with their sex lives (Twitter) 

• Men experience more sexual satisfaction than women.
Causes of Sexual
Dissatisfaction
• Males: Body Image issues, performance anxiety, Can’t
find anyone to date, emotional disconnection,
complacency, sexual incompatibility, lack of
communication. 

• Females: Body image issues, cultural shaming, lack of
emotional connection, performance anxiety, sexual
incompatibility, inability to communicate needs.
Common Areas of Desired
Improvement
Men
1. Pleasure Mechanics (lasting longer, oral sex, making her orgasm)

2. Emotional Connection 

3. Understanding female anatomy 

4. Exploration

5. Communication

Women
1. Confidence in taking control (advocating for their pleasure)

2. Body Image 

3. Pleasure mechanics

4. Communication 

5. Exploration
How to Increase Sexual
Satisfaction
• Redefine what sex and pleasure mean.

• Make sex a priority, and create standards/boundaries.

• Have more sex with Self

• Improve overall health (mental, physical, spiritual) 

• EDUCATION, EDUCATION, EDUCATION! (Find a teacher, or self study)

• Learn how to communicate about sex compassionately without attachment to outcome. 

• Attend classes, seminars or retreats.

• Subscribe to online programs and websites that offer training. 

• Work on healing unprocessed emotions and sexual traumas.
Resources To Find Sex Educators,
Therapists and Expert Advice
• assect.org, American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and therapists. 

• American College of Sexologists (dot) com.

• Social Media-Twitter, Instagram, Youtube (search #sexologist #sextherapist #sexpert
#sexed) @afrosexology_ @Sexpositivefamilies @dirtylola 

• Media Outlets: thesexed.com, spectrumboutique.com, kinkly.com, The O School
(o.school), glamerotica101.com 

• Google Search (can be overwhelming, but a good start) 

• Expos (Exxxotica Expo, FetCon, Adult Con, Sex Down South)

• Publications (amazon.com, Barnes and Noble)

• Toy shops: sexed.com, adameve.com sweetvibes.toys, lovehoney.com,
Known Influencers in the Sex
Education Space
• Shan Boodrum (Clinical Sexologist) 

• Laci Green (Sex educator)

• Ev’yan Whitney (Sexual Doula)

• Tyomi Morgan-Najieb (Pleasure Coach, Ethical Erotica Producer, Event coordinator)

• Tiffany Janay (Yoni Crystal Expert, womb healer, life catalyst)

• Kenneth Play (World Renowned Sex Hacker)

• Dr. Zhana (Sex researcher, Educator, Coach) 

• Dr. Jessica O’Reilly (Sex and Relationship expert)

• Sunny Megatron (BDSM, Showtime, American Podcast) 

• Dr. Rachel Ross, M.D., PhD (Sexologist, Physician)

• Devi Ward Erickson (Tantric Buddhist and founder of Institute of Authentic Tantra Education) 

• Jet Setting Jasmine (Master Fetish Trainer, Clinical therapist, Ethical Porn Producer)

• Tristan Taormino (Feminist, Author, Educator, Activist)

• Marla Stewart (Founder of SDS, Professional Sex, Intimacy and relationship coach and sex educator)
Issues with Accessibility
Access Via Social Media

• Heavy Censorship Online (Sesta/Fosta) (New Terms of Service)

• Shadow banning 

• Limited Search visibility (blocked hashtags)

• Page deletion

Access to Comprehensive Sex Ed

• Not all outlets are inclusive of all genders, orientations and lifestyles.

• Lots of information, short attention spans. 

• Classes and coaching are behind paywalls (avg. Coaching price $110 per hour) (Not covered by insurance).

• Information Not quickly accessible

• Mainstream media promotes heteronormative, cis white Leaning stories/coaches/outlets/platforms over everything.
Partnering With
Pornography and Erotica
• Is it possible? Hell YES! 

• What efforts are being made now? Not Many (pornhub.com Sexual Wellness Center).

• Increase in Feminist porn production where female pleasure is prominent (Bree Mills,
Ericka Lust).

• Nina Hartley-Vintage Adult Starlet and Sex Educator.

• Jessica Drake-Adult Film Star & Sex Educator. 

• Glamerotica101 App (18+).

• MAJOR DISPARITIES FOR MARGINALIZED GROUPS (most porn is cis white male
leaning). 

• Porn Producers focused more on Profit than Purpose (fantasy).
Ways NCSH Can Partner
With Pornography
• Work directly with producers to create treatments for
impactful visual content.

• My motto: FTI (FLOOD THE INTERNET)

• Edutainment (educate and entertain)

• Create viral social media campaigns with Influencers in the
adult industry (shorts). 

• Educate a Porn star (a show, and a conference)

• Video content is QUEEEEENNNNNN!

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Bridging the Pleasure Gap - Tyomi Morgan-Najieb

  • 1. Bridging the Pleasure Gap A Closer Look at Sexual Satisfaction
  • 2. Tyomi Morgan-Najieb Certified Sexologist, Sex Blogger, Pleasure Coach, Erotic Content Creator.
  • 3. My Accomplishments in Sexual Health • Launched Glamerotica101.com in 2011 to focus on female sexual empowerment for women, black women specifically. (Blogger) • Create sex positive spaces for people to discuss sexuality and expand their experience safely. (Events) • Frequent sexual health contributor to podcasts, radio shows and publications. (Media) (Ebony Magazine, blackdoctor.org, Huffington Post, NYT, TheLily) • Award winning Producer of erotica and sexual health video content. (Youtube) (Featured on Comedy Central) (Viral) • Social Media Sex Influencer leading conversations through Twitter and Instagram*** • Pro Choice advocate and activist. (Host of All Access Chicago 2016 and PPIL Generations event 2017) • Seminar Coordinator and Resident for the Exxxotica Expo.
  • 4. My Demographics Data collected from Social Media • Core demo age: Youtube: 18-34 Instagram: 25-44 • Gender: Youtube: 51.2% Male, 48.8% Female Twitter: 66% Male 34% Female Instagram: 51% Women 49% Men • Most in Heteronormative relationships or subscribe to heteronormative behaviors. • Over Half of my core demographic is single (18-35).
  • 5. What is the Pleasure Gap? • Discontent with erotic experiences. • Limited awareness of what is considered pleasurable. • Disconnect from Partner’s Pleasure. • Originates from Orgasm-Based sexual programming. • What has sparked this conversation: The Gender orgasm gap. In 2009, the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior (NSSHB) asked 1,931 U.S. adults ages 18 to 59 about their most recent sexual experience. The topline findings show that men are more likely to orgasm than women — 91 percent of men said they climaxed during their last sexual encounter, compared with 64 percent of women
  • 6. Are Americans Satisfied With Their Sex Lives? • Short Answer: HELL NO!!! Glamerotica101 Stats: • The average person in a partnered relationship feels short changed sexually. • Of 1,098 people polled on 9/2/2019, 43% are unsatisfied with their sex lives (Twitter) • Men experience more sexual satisfaction than women.
  • 7. Causes of Sexual Dissatisfaction • Males: Body Image issues, performance anxiety, Can’t find anyone to date, emotional disconnection, complacency, sexual incompatibility, lack of communication. • Females: Body image issues, cultural shaming, lack of emotional connection, performance anxiety, sexual incompatibility, inability to communicate needs.
  • 8. Common Areas of Desired Improvement Men 1. Pleasure Mechanics (lasting longer, oral sex, making her orgasm) 2. Emotional Connection 3. Understanding female anatomy 4. Exploration 5. Communication Women 1. Confidence in taking control (advocating for their pleasure) 2. Body Image 3. Pleasure mechanics 4. Communication 5. Exploration
  • 9. How to Increase Sexual Satisfaction • Redefine what sex and pleasure mean. • Make sex a priority, and create standards/boundaries. • Have more sex with Self • Improve overall health (mental, physical, spiritual) • EDUCATION, EDUCATION, EDUCATION! (Find a teacher, or self study) • Learn how to communicate about sex compassionately without attachment to outcome. • Attend classes, seminars or retreats. • Subscribe to online programs and websites that offer training. • Work on healing unprocessed emotions and sexual traumas.
  • 10. Resources To Find Sex Educators, Therapists and Expert Advice • assect.org, American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and therapists. • American College of Sexologists (dot) com. • Social Media-Twitter, Instagram, Youtube (search #sexologist #sextherapist #sexpert #sexed) @afrosexology_ @Sexpositivefamilies @dirtylola • Media Outlets: thesexed.com, spectrumboutique.com, kinkly.com, The O School (o.school), glamerotica101.com • Google Search (can be overwhelming, but a good start) • Expos (Exxxotica Expo, FetCon, Adult Con, Sex Down South) • Publications (amazon.com, Barnes and Noble) • Toy shops: sexed.com, adameve.com sweetvibes.toys, lovehoney.com,
  • 11. Known Influencers in the Sex Education Space • Shan Boodrum (Clinical Sexologist) • Laci Green (Sex educator) • Ev’yan Whitney (Sexual Doula) • Tyomi Morgan-Najieb (Pleasure Coach, Ethical Erotica Producer, Event coordinator) • Tiffany Janay (Yoni Crystal Expert, womb healer, life catalyst) • Kenneth Play (World Renowned Sex Hacker) • Dr. Zhana (Sex researcher, Educator, Coach) • Dr. Jessica O’Reilly (Sex and Relationship expert) • Sunny Megatron (BDSM, Showtime, American Podcast) • Dr. Rachel Ross, M.D., PhD (Sexologist, Physician) • Devi Ward Erickson (Tantric Buddhist and founder of Institute of Authentic Tantra Education) • Jet Setting Jasmine (Master Fetish Trainer, Clinical therapist, Ethical Porn Producer) • Tristan Taormino (Feminist, Author, Educator, Activist) • Marla Stewart (Founder of SDS, Professional Sex, Intimacy and relationship coach and sex educator)
  • 12. Issues with Accessibility Access Via Social Media • Heavy Censorship Online (Sesta/Fosta) (New Terms of Service) • Shadow banning • Limited Search visibility (blocked hashtags) • Page deletion Access to Comprehensive Sex Ed • Not all outlets are inclusive of all genders, orientations and lifestyles. • Lots of information, short attention spans. • Classes and coaching are behind paywalls (avg. Coaching price $110 per hour) (Not covered by insurance). • Information Not quickly accessible • Mainstream media promotes heteronormative, cis white Leaning stories/coaches/outlets/platforms over everything.
  • 13. Partnering With Pornography and Erotica • Is it possible? Hell YES! • What efforts are being made now? Not Many (pornhub.com Sexual Wellness Center). • Increase in Feminist porn production where female pleasure is prominent (Bree Mills, Ericka Lust). • Nina Hartley-Vintage Adult Starlet and Sex Educator. • Jessica Drake-Adult Film Star & Sex Educator. • Glamerotica101 App (18+). • MAJOR DISPARITIES FOR MARGINALIZED GROUPS (most porn is cis white male leaning). • Porn Producers focused more on Profit than Purpose (fantasy).
  • 14. Ways NCSH Can Partner With Pornography • Work directly with producers to create treatments for impactful visual content. • My motto: FTI (FLOOD THE INTERNET) • Edutainment (educate and entertain) • Create viral social media campaigns with Influencers in the adult industry (shorts). • Educate a Porn star (a show, and a conference) • Video content is QUEEEEENNNNNN!