In this class we talk about the different type of parents and the type of kids we are likely to produce. Reflect on what type of parent you are and ask yourself if that is the type of child you would like.

1. Permissive Parent Characteristics
Very “loving”…So “loving” that they give in, don’t
set rules and…they
Avoid confrontation
Weak - can’t say no…maybe too tired, afraid of
confrontation, etc.
Cave in to tantrums
www.howsyourlovecup.com

2. Permissive Parent Characteristics
Don’t assign chores/responsibilities
Protect kids from any frustration (i.e., chores)
Don’t teach kids to wait (instant gratification)
Are inconsistent
Are very protective
www.howsyourlovecup.com

3. Permissive Parent Results
They stunt emotional growth - kids never leave the
“me…me…me” stage (0-4 yr old)
Don’t know how to wait – don’t know how to work
before they play, how to save, etc., etc.
Are master manipulators
Are weak, like the example of their parents
Don’t feel loved www.howsyourlovecup.com

4. Permissive Parent Results
Have low self-worth
Have the wreckless attitude of “Risk it”
Can’t say no
Don’t learn to obey (no respect for authority
Don’t trust you, you have no credibility
www.howsyourlovecup.com

5. “Drill Sergeant” Parent Characteristics
Controlling
Ordering/Yelling
Think for you
“I’m right” “my way or the highway”
Do not allow any discussion
Commonly use violence
www.howsyourlovecup.com

6. “Drill Sergeant” Parent Characteristics
Show favoritism – compare kids
Are perfectionists
Criticize in an attempt to motivate
Use Guilt Trips / Mind Games/Black Mail
Don’t respect boundaries
www.howsyourlovecup.com

7. “Drill Sergeant” Parent Results
Your kids will:
Feel humiliated
Feel “like nothing” (invisible)
Be Afraid to be Creative
Live in Fear – freeze
Have distant relationships
www.howsyourlovecup.com

8. “Drill Sargeant” Parent Results
Be experts at sneaking / lying
Not be able to say no
Have Low Self Esteem
Likely be a Bully
Not like Siblings (result of being compared)
www.howsyourlovecup.com

9. “Drill Sargeant” Parent Results
Not know what they like,
Have a hard time making decisions, no common
sense
Question themselves - insecure
Not try their best – why bother
Often “go wild”
Run from your values/God www.howsyourlovecup.com

10. Coach-Type Parent Characteristics
Love Healthily = Have Limits/Rules/Boundaries
Insist on Obedience – (Do not fear not being liked)
Are firm and loving – Kids always know the
consequences in advance (always fair)
Are very encouraging – praise the effort, not the
person (I am vs. I can change)
www.howsyourlovecup.com

11. Coach-Type Parent Characteristics
Your kids will:
Believe in You – don’t do things for you
Involve Everyone – create a team give job
Respectful, Stick up for you, Always Teaching
www.howsyourlovecup.com

12. Coach-Type Parent Results
Know how to choose – how to make decisions –
Learn to obey (understand consequences)
Have high self worth
Be able to say no
Know it’s ok to like different things
Not fear not being liked – no peer pressure
www.howsyourlovecup.com

13. Coach-Type Parent Results
Feel Competent – not afraid to make mistakes
Be Creative
Will Trust you / Believe you / Respect you
www.howsyourlovecup.com