1. (Your Name)
(Instructor’s Name)
(Subject)
March 17, 2012
Online Gaming: The effect on Personal Relationships
Abstract
Online gaming has been a development built on the technology of the internet. The
internet, being an innovation that allowed people to interact with other people globally created
new ways of building relationships. The ability of the internet to build relationships allowed the
resilience of online gaming to create a wide variety of audience amongst different cultures
around the world. In respect, though online gaming allowed people to create new relationships,
other relationships are bound to be affected by the new relationships that are created by online
gaming. This paper will discuss the different factors that affect relationships that involve online
gaming, whether with other gamers or with people who do not engage themselves into online
gaming.
Keywords: Online Gaming, MMORPG, relationships
Globalization has caused major changes in how people interact with one another. In the
age where the internet allows people to see and talk with different people in different areas while
staying inside ones own domain have caused innovations that people have become inclined into.

2. One of which that have been developed to harness the internet are the different online games.
Online games are virtual environments in which people are able to create a new realm of social
relationships; users are able to build their own groups, and organizations that share a common
belief, goal or preference (Chiou & Wan, 2006). In the world of massive multi-player on-line
role-playing games (MMORPGs), the environment can be equated to the real world in which the
virtual environment does not stop when people go off-line, it continues even when people come
and go which allows different people to interact with different people. The internet itself is said
to be not addictive, but the different activities embedded within the system, such as online
games, are the ones that can become addictive to people (Chiou & Wan, 2006). This paper will
analyze how online games affect the different relationships of people who engage in the game
with the people around them, such as their family and friends.
Previous researches have created results that illustrate that the excessive use of online
games can result in negative outcomes, such as negative impacts on academic performances,
increased anxiety, escape from reality, youth violence and crimes, and the deterioration of
interpersonal relationships (Chiou & Wan, 2006). Online games, in a way create a whole new
environment in which the users are nudged away from their “real” lives and become dislodged
from the people they know. The effects of online games create an image in which people become
aloof from their friends and family, that people who are into online games destroy their
relationships with the people in their lives. Much research that have been done are based on
quantitative research paradigms, involving in-depth interviews of online game addicts and not
necessarily why people engage in such; results in which qualitative methods are used (Chiou &

3. Wan, 2006). New researches have tried to create new results and discussions in which online
gaming is perceived in building new relationships or being able to strengthen old relationships.
Online games, one of the myths that surround it is that it only appeals to children and
adolescents (Cole & Griffiths, 2007). People don’t realize that those who engage in MMORPGs
are those who can be independent and should be able to sustain their own lives, studies show that
the age of players are mostly 23.6years and a significant number, 28.2% are over 25years of age,
and only a small number of people were under 18years (Cole & Griffiths, 2007). Another study
showed that 36% of gamers are married and 22% have children (ESA, 2005; Yee, 2004, 2006 as
cited by Hertlein & Hawkins, 2012). The relationship of the age of the players and the
relationships of these players with the different people is significant to look at because in theory,
these people are capable of deciding for themselves and are able to live independently and are
able to live up to the consequences of their lives. Previous researches made assumptions that
gamers are socially inactive, however, the new studies show that people who played online
games have created good friends within the game (Cole & Griffiths, 2007). New relationships
have been forged within the game that allowed people to interact with different people even if
the environment differs from where they live in. This created a new image of online games,
being something that is highly socially interactive which allows people to interact and share there
lives to different people (Cole & Griffiths, 2007). In relation to pre-existing relationships such as
family and friends, studies show that people does not necessarily engage in online games alone,
they share their online experiences with their “real-life” friends and family (Cole & Griffiths,
2007).

4. Unlike the previous findings that players tend to be dislodged from reality and tend to use
online game to escape from reality, the new findings show that online games is a tool that friends
and family use to bond together and create a stronger relationship. MMORPGs involve the
necessity to join guilds or clans to accomplish primary objectives and progress within the game
(Hertlein & Hawkins, 2012). Playing MMORPGs require players to interact with other people
who play the game, which encourages teamwork, camaraderie, and collaboration. It can also
increase the understanding between the different relationships within a person. Previous studies
show that video games helped families to achieve a certain level of togetherness which was not
experienced previously (Mitchell, 1985 as cited by Hertlein & Hawkins, 2012).
But as it can create stronger bonds, online games can also create difficulties within
families and couples, especially when only one of the couple is engaged in the game (Hertlein &
Hawkins, 2012). Just as much as it provides positive aspects in building relationships it can also
provide negative facets within relationships. Online gaming also has two sides of the coin. In a
study, such a large number of gamers were already married and or in dating relationships which
state that gaming has become a primary presenting problem rather than a secondary one (Hertlein
& Hawkins, 2012). A study analyzed the different factors that can cause a crack in relationships
brought about by online gaming. The study showed that some factors that affect relationships are
the motivations to play, addiction, personality characteristics, gender, overall well-being, and
relationship intimacy (Herlein & Hawkins, 2012). Online gaming can be a way for players to
alleviate negative feelings such as frustration, loneliness, or boredom (Hussain & Griffiths, 2009
as cited by Hertlein & Hawkins, 2012). This can be a negative attribute toward relationships
because players tend to hide their frustrations in real life and mask it with being happy online.

5. Instead of being able to create a solution to a problem, the player tends to hide his problems
away and create a barrier into which relationships falter and be destroyed.
“Although the gaming partner in a relationship has an entire network of interactions,
loyalties, and responsibilities within the gaming world, these networks may be invisible and
intangible to the non-game player” (Hertlein & Hawkins, 2012). People in the social structure of
the player in-game may not be part of the friends and family social structures that these people
who are unknown to the friends and family may create feelings of jealousy, resentment and hurt.
People who are not in the gaming world may feel neglected by the people who are playing the
game. This tends to create distance between the player and to those who do not involve
themselves to work. Studies showed that individuals, who pursued relationships online, not
necessarily intimate, created less intimacy with their face to face relationships. Some gamers,
mostly addicts, stated that playing online games have become the focus of their lives (Chiou &
Wan, 2006). They have lived their lives that are intertwined with gaming, believing that without
online games, their lives would become “dark” and “bored” (Chiou & Wan, 2006). The
inabilities of “real-life” relationships to cope for the necessities of gamers create the negative
effects of online gaming.
Most of the subjects in the present study showed strong interests in role-playing
of online games, in which they often do things that they dare not to do in real life. In an
anonymous environment, online game players always appear with nicknames instead of
real names. Thus, many people who are addicted to the Internet might attempt to escape
from the limitations brought by real life in order to obtain the space for survival and
security. This indicates that online gaming brings a anonymous environment with lower
public self-awareness, and allows players to stop concentrating on the self-consciousness
in order to prevent becoming overly worried about what other people would evaluate and
judge the way they act in front of others. From the perspective of psychodynamics, at the
conscious level addicted players might seek self presentation in an anonymous, relaxing,

6. and secure space, but unconsciously, they might actually have an unsatisfied need for
self-presentation due to their poor self-image in real life.
(Chiou & Wan, 2006)
In a way, role-playing games allow a person to be someone whom he desires to be. The
ability to dictate what path you choose in game allows a player to control his own life, more
often than not, why people get hooked into the game. Also, the ability to create a whole new
identity including the anonymity of the person within the game allows creates a more appealing
environment for a person than to deal with the different discriminations involved in a society,
such as skin color, speech, or even nationality of a person. In an attempt to create a whole new
image of oneself, this leads to a risk of dislodging oneself from the world in which one has to go
back after playing the game.
MMORPGs can be capable of being as goal-oriented or as relaxed as the people who
engage in it desire it to be. In part, it appeals to people because it provides the opportunity to
create an experience that is unique for any individual in-game. The negative effects of the games
must not be ignored, but it should not also be blustered out of proportion. MMORPGs can be
extremely social in nature, with the different experiences of gamers making life-long friends and
even partners for life. MMORPGs are by no means an asocial doing, nor are the gamers
generally introverted. The virtual world that online games offer permit players to express
themselves in ways they may not feel comfortable doing in real life because of their appearance,
gender, sexuality, age, or other factors (Cole & Griffiths, 2007). Online games can offer a place
where cooperation, support, and fun can be experienced all at the same time which can improve a
person online and offline.

7. Relationships are built with the understanding that involves two parties who understand
each other. It is strengthened through positive interactions and through overcoming negative
experiences within the different persons involved. Relationships are broken because of the
inability to understand each other. The failures to develop these interactions are the true problem
in which relationship problems arise. Whether relationships are built online or offline, it all boils
down to the ability of a person, group, family or friends to understand each other. If a
relationship is to be strengthened, people should take into priority the other person and not only
what he or she believes in. A relationship is built from the mutual understanding of the people
within your own circle, online or offline. The studies show that online gaming does not
necessarily harness negative relationships but it can bring about positive characteristics that can
bring new relationships or strengthen old ones. As people who live in an age of technological
developments, going online has become an integral part of our lives. Online gaming is just a part
of the internet world, how we use and perceive it greatly depends on the people who use it. If
people want to build relationships, online or offline, it is in their ability to understand the other
person and not the medium in which he or she meets the people.

8. Bibliography
Chiou, W.-B., & Wan, C.-S. (2006). Why Are Adolescents Addicted to Online Gaming? An
Interview Study in Taiwan. Cyber Psychology and Behavior , 762-766.
Cole, H., & Griffiths, M. D. (2007). Social Interactions in Massively Multiplayer Online Role-
Playing Gamers. Cyber Psychology & Behavior , 575-583.
Hertlein, K. M., & Hawkins, B. P. (2012). Online Gaming Issues in Offline Couple
Relationships: A Primer for Marriage and Family Therapists (MFTs). The Qualitative
Report 2012 , 1-48.
Retrieved March 17, 2012, from http://www.nova.edu/ssss/QR/QR17/hertlein.pdf