Getting out of yourself and writing your own life What does it mean to “get out of yourself”? · Remember that we have a collection of beliefs about ourselves · Self-concept · I am a good person · I value helping others · I am scared of heights · These beliefs (self-schemas) are concerned with personality, ability, values, goals, social roles, perceptions, etc. · Part of our beliefs include setting limitations for ourselves · I am not artistically talented · I would never be able to give a talk to 100 people · I’m too shy · I can’t understand chemistry Why would we set limitations for ourselves? Self-Imposed Limitations · Why do we set limitations for ourselves? · There are a number of reasons why limitations can be helpful · I am not somebody who drinks and drives · I don’t like spicy food · I don’t let strangers into my home · These limitations come from past experiences, feedback from others · They are adaptive mechanisms for self preservation · As with any protective mechanism, too much of a good thing is a bad thing · Has this happened to you? · What happens if you ignore those limitations? · Anxiety/Discomfort · The body’s way of signaling about a perceived threat · Cognitive Dissonance? · Conflict when we hold two opposing beliefs · The distance between who you say and believe you are and who your actions say you are What does it mean to get out of yourself? · Getting out of yourself means going beyond the limitations you have imposed on yourself · Experiencing something you didn’t think you could · Letting go of beliefs that no longer serve you or add value to your life · Sitting with the discomfort · When we sit with discomfort instead of avoiding it we promote growth · Resiliency, skill development, emotional regulation, choice muscle · Therapy is about finding what causes you discomfort, becoming aware of it, sitting with it, deciding what to change about it What is it like to get out of yourself? · For me, I have to get out of my limitations related to anxiety every time I teach a new class · It is excruciating/exhilarating · Simultaneously the best and worst part · In college my limitations were even more restrictive than they are now · The result of challenging myself has been growth that I can measure through the experiences in my life · Getting out of myself has led to a positive outcome · That doesn’t mean it’s been easy/pretty · What has it been like for all of you? · When have you challenged your self-imposed limitations and “gotten out of yourself”? · What did you do/are you planning to do for your paper? · What did you experience? · What did you learn? Would you push yourself outside of your comfort zone again? Writing our own lives · Life is a collection of stories we tell to and about ourselves · Limitations are part of the story we tell about ourselves · Writing your life means taking an active role in creating your life and the story you tell about it · When you have awareness and you are purposeful you are act ...

1. Getting out of yourself and writing your own life
What does it mean to “get out of yourself”?
· Remember that we have a collection of beliefs about ourselves
· Self-concept
· I am a good person
· I value helping others
· I am scared of heights
· These beliefs (self-schemas) are concerned with personality,
ability, values, goals, social roles, perceptions, etc.
· Part of our beliefs include setting limitations for ourselves
· I am not artistically talented
· I would never be able to give a talk to 100 people
· I’m too shy
· I can’t understand chemistry
Why would we set limitations for ourselves?
Self-Imposed Limitations
· Why do we set limitations for ourselves?
· There are a number of reasons why limitations can be helpful
· I am not somebody who drinks and drives
· I don’t like spicy food
· I don’t let strangers into my home
· These limitations come from past experiences, feedback from
others
· They are adaptive mechanisms for self preservation
· As with any protective mechanism, too much of a good thing
is a bad thing
· Has this happened to you?
· What happens if you ignore those limitations?
· Anxiety/Discomfort
· The body’s way of signaling about a perceived threat
· Cognitive Dissonance?
· Conflict when we hold two opposing beliefs
· The distance between who you say and believe you are and

2. who your actions say you are
What does it mean to get out of yourself?
· Getting out of yourself means going beyond the limitations
you have imposed on yourself
· Experiencing something you didn’t think you could
· Letting go of beliefs that no longer serve you or add value to
your life
· Sitting with the discomfort
· When we sit with discomfort instead of avoiding it we
promote growth
· Resiliency, skill development, emotional regulation, choice
muscle
· Therapy is about finding what causes you discomfort,
becoming aware of it, sitting with it, deciding what to change
about it
What is it like to get out of yourself?
· For me, I have to get out of my limitations related to anxiety
every time I teach a new class
· It is excruciating/exhilarating
· Simultaneously the best and worst part
· In college my limitations were even more restrictive than they
are now
· The result of challenging myself has been growth that I can
measure through the experiences in my life
· Getting out of myself has led to a positive outcome
· That doesn’t mean it’s been easy/pretty
· What has it been like for all of you?
· When have you challenged your self-imposed limitations and
“gotten out of yourself”?
· What did you do/are you planning to do for your paper?
· What did you experience?
· What did you learn?
Would you push yourself outside of your comfort zone again?

3. Writing our own lives
· Life is a collection of stories we tell to and about ourselves
· Limitations are part of the story we tell about ourselves
· Writing your life means taking an active role in creating your
life and the story you tell about it
· When you have awareness and you are purposeful you are
actively writing your life
· This is what personal growth is all about
· Take inventory of what you have learned about yourself this
semester
· Beliefs
· Values
· Goals
· Personality
· Decide who you are
Self-Authorship is part of healthy personal growth
Self Authorship Defined
· Ability to develop your own perspective
· Capacity to author or invent one’s own beliefs, sense of self,
and relationships with others
· Reflection of how you express how you know something
· What do I really know? How do I know?
· Active meaning-making
· Synthesis of different parts of your personality
· Values
· Loyalties
· Beliefs
Three main components of self-authorship
· Trust your internal voice
· Listening to your gut
· Trusting yourself to make the right choices
· Building an internal foundation
· Having a strong and secure base
· Securing internal commitments

4. · Through actions that are consistent with your beliefs
· Walking the walk
Testicular Cancer Case Studies
A 21-year-old male noted pain in his right testicle while
studying hard for his midterm college examinations. On self-
examination, he noted a “grape sized” mass in the right testicle.
This finding was corroborated by his healthcare provider. This
young man had a history of delayed descent of his right testicle
until the age of 1 year old.
Studies
Results
Routine laboratory studies
Within normal limits (WNL)
Ultrasound the testicle
Solid mass, right testicle associated with calcifications
HCG (human chorionic gonadotropin)
550mIU/mL (normal: <5)
CT scan of the abdomen
Enlarged retroperitoneal lymph nodes
CT scan of the chest
Multiple pulmonary nodules
Diagnostic Analysis
At semester break, this young man underwent right
orchiectomy. Pathology was compatible with embryonal cell
carcinoma. CT directed biopsy of the most prominent
pulmonary nodule indicated embryonal cell carcinoma,
compatible with metastatic testicular carcinoma. During a leave
of absence from college, and after banking his sperm, this
young man underwent aggressive chemotherapy. Repeat testing
12 weeks after chemotherapy showed complete resolution of the
pulmonary nodules and enlarged retroperitoneal lymph nodes.
Critical Thinking Questions
1. What impact did an undescended testicle have on this young

5. man’s risk for developing testicular cancer?
2. What might be the side effects of cytotoxic chemotherapy?
3. What was the purpose of preserving his sperm before
chemotherapy?
4. Is this young man’s age typical for the development of
testicular carcinoma?
Developing AWARENESS
What is awareness?
· Awareness is the ability to recognize and describe emotion in
oneself and others
· Knowledge or perception of a situation or fact
· The state or quality of being conscious of something
Discussion
· Journal 1 - Awareness
· Share your experience
· Hard? Easy?
· Why do we need awareness?
· How does awareness help personal growth?
Awareness from Freud’s view
Awareness from Stevens’ view
· Awareness of the outside world
· Actual sensory contact with objects and events in the present
(I feel the pen in my hand, I hear the lawnmower outside)
· Awareness of the inside world
· Actual sensory contact with inner events of the present (My
skin itches, my stomach feels nervous)
· Awareness of fantasy activity
· Mental activity beyond present awareness of ongoing
experience (Daydreaming during class
Five Levels of Awareness
· Awareness of bodily sensations.
· TASK: express awareness.

6. · Awareness of the body in action.
· TASK: Awareness of body impulses and action tendencies
associated with emotions.
· Awareness of individual feelings
· TASK: Express awareness of personal feelings
· Awareness of blends of feelings
· TASK: Form complex emotional responses to individuals.
· Awareness of blends of blends of feelings
· TASK: differentiate between integrate, and respond
appropriately to complex emotional experiences of self and
others
Awareness skills
· Focusing
· Generalizing
· Selection
· Avoiding
· Duration and Flow
· Connection and interruption
· Pleasant-unpleasant
· Shuttling
· Intending
· Process
· Physical activities
· Releasing your body
· Contact-withdrawal
· Daily Task
Why is Awareness Important?
· In the moment
· Mindfulness is the practice of being aware of what is
happening in the present moment without judgment
· Focusing on the present moment helps decrease anxiety and
depression
· Of the self
· Having an accurate picture of who you are;
· Personality, strengths, and weaknesses
· Of yourself in relation to others

7. · Understanding what role you play in your relationship with
others
Stress and Social Development
Biopsychosocial Model of Illness
· Holds that physical illness is caused by a complex interaction
of biological, psychological, and sociocultural factors
· Biological factors operate in a psychosocial context that can
also be highly influential
· Health Psychology is concerned with how psychosocial factors
relate to the promotion and maintenance of health and with the
causation, prevention, and treatment of illness
Stress, Personality, and Illness
· How does personality impact wellness?
· Strong link found between anger and hostility and coronary
disease
· If you walk around angry all the time you’re going to have a
bad time
· Many findings to link (correlational) stress and illness in the
body
· Stress undermines the body’s immune functioning
· Why Zebra’s Don’t Get Ulcers, Robert Sapolsky
· https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ePYet3Fbts
Stress and Relationships
· Chronic stress has the potential to negatively impact social,
familial, and romantic connections
· Individuals who struggle to effectively manage stress are
prone to emotional outbursts
· Can contribute to higher frequency or intensity in
interpersonal conflicts
· Who we blame when we are stressed
· Do you blame yourself and as a result experience decreased
self esteem
· Do you blame others and as a result experience decreased
relationship satisfaction

8. Stress and Social Development
· Stress and social functioning impact each other in a circular
way
· Stress impacts relationships/relationships impact stress
· Can be positive or negative
· Low self-esteem causes increased stress in social interactions
· Stressful social interactions may decrease individual’s desire
to create meaningful relationships
· Unmanaged stress can turn into chronic anxiety
· Social anxiety, social phobia, generalized anxiety
What is wellness?
· Well being is defined as being both healthy and happy
· How do we achieve this?
· What is the difference?
Is there a relationship between the two?
Six Dimensions of Wellness
· Physical
· How well does your body work?
· Exercise, nutrition, rest, sleep, stress management, self care
· Intellectual
· Learning new things, expanding your knowledge base as well
as your brain
· Mental Illness – breakdown in the way your brain processes
information
· Emotional
· Positive and realistic self concept
· Emotional Intelligence
· Resiliency
· Social
· How we connect and interact with people
· How meaningful are these connections?
· Career
· Job satisfaction, career ambitions, work performance

9. · Spiritual
Having a sense of inner peace and contentment
How do we improve these dimensions?
· One step at a time
· https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p3JPa2mvSQ4
· Cultivate and maintain meaningful relationships (Social)
· Identify and express your emotions (Emotional)
· Proper sleep hygiene, regular activity, frequent self care, diet
(Physical)
· https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T9IZDInBv1M
· Continually seeking opportunities to learn, brain games,
DOING YOUR HOMEWORK (Intellectual)
· Meditation, yoga, self reflection, focusing on obtaining inner
peace (Spiritual)
· Set goals, plan for the future, acknowledge your
accomplishments along the way (Career)
· Stay committed to your changes
· https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5MVJOI8RbnQ
Managing Stress as a Path to Wellness
· Mindfulness
· Defined as an intentional, nonjudgmental awareness and
observation of our experiences in the present moment without
seeking to change them immediately (much is taken from the
Buddhist philosophies)
· Mindfulness increases our ability to develop Meta Awareness
· An awareness of what we are experiencing right now
· Am I physically and mentally present?
· Worrying about things means you are not mentally present
· Mindfulness is an important component of Dialectical
Behavior Therapy (DBT)
· Often used in treatment of Borderline Personality Disorder,
Bipolar, or other mood disorders
· Helps to increase emotional regulation
· Develop coping skills to successfully manage triggers and

10. reactive states
· Allows for stronger therapeutic presence and emotional
awareness in session
· Challenges to just mindfully be with the problem/issue instead
of always seek to change it immediately
· Promotes openness, humanity and acceptance of clients
· Effective self-care technique
· Increase ability to shift attention, rather than letting emotions
determine the focus
· Create a non-judgmental and objective perspective of
emotions, thoughts and sensations
· Develop ability to live in the moment and not in the past or
future-focus on here and now experiences
Mindfulness Resource
· www.calm.com
· Can also be downloaded as a free app on your smart phone
· Provides guided meditations, body scan activity, mindfulness
skill building, and many more resources
· Useful to learn about the practice of mindfulness and to build
up skills
· Practicing mindfulness daily has positive benefits
Baby Steps: Applying what you’ve learned
· ASK YOURSELF:
· What are you going to do this weekend to try and improve one
of your own personal wellness dimensions?
· Identify a goal
· Commit yourself to a plan of action
· Tell a friend or invite someone to join you to create
accountability
What Is Personality
· According to the text

11. · Personality is, “an individual’s unique constellation of
consistent behavioral traits”(Weiten, Hammer, and Dunn, 2014)
· “Personality includes characteristic patterns of thought,
emotion, and behavior, together with the psychological
mechanisms-hidden or not-behind those patterns.” (Funder,
2007)
· Psychologists who research personality take different
approaches to their research:
· Basic approach
· Observes patterns
· Trait approach
· Focuses on traits
· Biological approach
· Looks at anatomy, physiology, genetics, evolution
· Psychoanalytic approach
· Assessing unconscious, subconscious
· Phenomenological approach
Listen to people’s conscious experience of the world
Personality Traits
· A personality trait is, “a durable disposition to behave in a
particular way in a variety of situations.”
· How do you most commonly behave across different
situations?
· Shy
· Honest
· Moody
· Friendly
· THINK: Describe your personality. What kind of traits come
to mind? How would someone else describe your personality?
· What do you notice about other people’s personalities?
Five-Factor Theory of Personality
· One of the most prominent theories of personality
· Also referred to as the "Five Factor Model" or FFM (Costa &
McCrae, 1992), and as the Global Factors of personality
(Russell & Karol, 1994)
· This theory states that almost all personality traits derive from

12. the Big Five Personality Traits
· Extroversion, Neuroticism, Openness to experience,
Agreeableness, and Conscientiousness
Five Factors
· Openness
· Curiosity, flexibility, vivid imagination, impulsive
· Conscientiousness
· Diligent, disciplined, well organized, dependable
· Extraversion
· Outgoing, sociable, upbeat, friendly, assertive
· Agreeableness
· Sympathetic, trusting, cooperative, modest
· Neuroticism
· Anxious, hostile, self-conscious, insecure, vulnerable
All five factors show an influence from both heredity and
environment.
Freudian Psychoanalytic Theory of Personality
· According to Freud: personality is divided into three main
components:
· Id
· Primitive, instinctive component of personality that operates
according to the pleasure principle
· Ego
· The decision making component of personality that operates
according to the reality principle
· Superego
· Moral component of personality that incorporates social
standards about what represents right and wrong
Myers-Briggs Type Indicator
· Introspective, self report inventory
· Assesses how people perceive the world and make decisions
· Based on Carl Jung’s theory of psychological types, uses 4
scales
· Extroversion/Introversion
· Sensing/Intuitive

13. · Thinking/Feeling
· Judging/Perceiving
· Results come in a Four letter combination
· ENFP
· An example of an MBTI type assessment can be found here
https://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test
Why does personality matter?
· We use what we know about a person’s personality to predict
their behavior
· We use what we know about our own personality to develop
coping skills and adaptability, preferences, and self-concepts
· Assessment of personality helps us determine who we want to
spend our time with
· Personality traits impact several different life outcomes
(stress, happiness, health, longevity, etc.)
· Assessing your own personality and comparing to who you
want to be is an important part of personal growth
· THINK: What traits would I change about myself? What traits
do I have that I would change?
Keep this in mind for your first journal
What is personal growth?
· Take a moment to ask yourself why you are taking this class
(aside from fulfilling degree requirements)
· What intrigues you about the idea of personal growth?
· Feeling a need for improvement?
· Wanting to be your best self?
· Suggestion of others?
· Not feeling content with the way you are?
· Human beings are often seeking to improve their current
situation (through improvement of self, circumstances,
activities, etc.)
Why?
What are we searching for?

14. · Direction? Happiness? Fulfillment? and?
· What do these things mean and why are they important?
· Direction
· Where am I going in life?
· Why am I on this path?
· Is your direction purposeful? (chosen by you)
· Is your direction passive? (a path you have been put on by
someone else or by certain circumstances)
· Happiness
· What does it mean to be happy?
· How do we achieve happiness?
· Ask yourself, what makes me genuinely happy?
· Do you create happiness or does it happen to you?
· Fulfillment
· What does it take to be fulfilled?
· How do you know when you’ve achieved it?
· A feeling
· A combination of a sense of purpose and resulting happiness
· What else? Why are we here?
What are we searching for?
· Why are people susceptible to cults?
· Why are we willing to go to such extreme lengths to find what
we are looking for?
· Sweat lodge example from text
· People will put their own health at risk in order to find
purpose and belonging
· We are hard wired for connection
· We seek to belong
· It hurts to be disconnected, to feel alone or left out
· The pain of disconnection often outweighs perceived risks
· We seek out things that we think will give us purpose
· What gives you purpose?
What are we searching for?
· Have you ever read a self-help book?
· Why?
· We often think we need to improve ourselves

15. · This isn’t always bad, sometimes it helps to try to improve
yourself
· We are comforted by knowing that others have struggled in
similar ways
· Did it help? Why or why not?
· Research has found that self-help books are often not based in
scientific research
· Self-help books are often vague in their prescription for
change
· What are the keys to happiness?
· Are you happy with your life?
Difference Between Growth and Development???
· Take some time to think about the following:
· What do you think of when you hear these words?
· What is growth?
· What is development?
Are they the same? How do they differ?
Barriers to personal growth
· Now that we have started to define personal growth and what
motivates the journey towards it:
· What gets in the way of personal growth?
· “If the consumption of these literary narcotics (self help
books) were even remotely as helpful as their publishers claim,
we would be a nation of serene, happy, well-adjusted people. It
is clear, however, that serenity is not the dominant national
mood.”
· Anxiety and depression are on the rise – but why?
· What gets in the way of your attempts to change?
Why don’t we change?
· Think: When was the last time you tried to make a change and
failed?
· Write: What prevented you from making that change?
· Think: When was the last time you tried to make a change and
succeeded?
· Write: What helped you make that change?

16. How do we change?
· There are three critical components to change
· Must be ready
· Is this the right time to make a change?
· Are you prepared to make a change?
· Must be willing
· Do you want to change?
· Are you being forced into change?
· Must be able
· Is this a change you can reasonable expect to be able to make?
· Are there limitations in your life that prevent you from being
able to make this change?
What do you need to grow?
· Clear definition of the problem
· Investigations of attempted solutions
· Definition of concrete change to be achieved
· Formulation and implementation of plan
How do you achieve this?
· Exploration of the disadvantages of status quo
· Why will keeping things the same not work?
· Exploration of the advantages of status quo
· What is gained by keeping things the same
· Generating an optimism for change and growth
· Displaying an intention to grow and change