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Multiple Selves?! Growing leaders applied. (CraftConf Meetup, Budapest, 2018)

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Mindfulness is well known for reducing stress. Did you know you can leverage it for so much more - e.g. to shape your leadership abilities?
In this meetup talk we will first focus on language, identity and awareness and how these rather basic 'human things' are relevant for modern leaders. I will guide you with the help of a validated psychological model how to identify and strengthen your personal leadership abilities. Together we will make connections to where you are right now and which techniques you can take right away to integrate mindfulness directly in your (business) life to actually take the next step towards your best possible selv(es

Published in: Leadership & Management
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Multiple Selves?! Growing leaders applied. (CraftConf Meetup, Budapest, 2018)

  1. 1. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 1 Multiple Selves?! Growing leaders applied. Cosima Laube @gazebo_c
  2. 2. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 2 Why are YOU here?
  3. 3. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 3 cosima@laube:~$ whoami
  4. 4. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 4
  5. 5. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 5 Why am I here?
  6. 6. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 6 Computer Work it is!
  7. 7. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 7 Well, that escalated happened quickly...
  8. 8. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 8 „no people work“ ?? „the easier choice“ ??
  9. 9. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 9 Crafting software is People Work
  10. 10. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 10
  11. 11. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 11
  12. 12. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 12 … again to university!
  13. 13. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 13 What colleagues thought I do...
  14. 14. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 14 … what I actually did (mostly)
  15. 15. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 15
  16. 16. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 16 I am a Guide...
  17. 17. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 17 Guide for Working Together
  18. 18. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 18 Software Development is People Work People Work is Leadership
  19. 19. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 19
  20. 20. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 20 “[…] the first person I need to lead is me. The first person that I should try to change is me.” [John C. Maxwell]
  21. 21. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 21 Leadership starts with YOURSELF
  22. 22. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 22 Leadership starts with YOUR SELF
  23. 23. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 23 Why are YOU here?
  24. 24. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 24 „Multiple Selves“ Model [Atkins & Styles, 2015]
  25. 25. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 25 Self as story or Conceptualised Self
  26. 26. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 26 Self as story Verbal description of yourself  public | private  labels, memories, plans, experiences, ...  abstraction of your past („Remembering Self“)  quite stable
  27. 27. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 27 Pro: • predictability • coherence Self as story
  28. 28. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 28 Pro: • predictability • coherence Con: - often too rigid - limiting yourself - comparing - too past-oriented Self as story
  29. 29. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 29 Self as process or Experiencing Self
  30. 30. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 30 Self as process Description of experiencing yourself…  in the present moment  in a particular context
  31. 31. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 31 Self as process  socially useful ( predictability)  basis of self-regulation
  32. 32. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 32 Self as perspective or Transcendental Self
  33. 33. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 33 Self as perspective  can not be observed (Transcendental Self)  content-free  only accessible through metaphors
  34. 34. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 34 pro- cess story pers pecti ve
  35. 35. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 35 pro- cess story pers pecti ve
  36. 36. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 36 process story perspec tive
  37. 37. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 37 process story perspec tive
  38. 38. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 38
  39. 39. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 39 Psychological Flexibility ++
  40. 40. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 40
  41. 41. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 41
  42. 42. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 42 Seeing the „whole“ picture
  43. 43. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 43 More options per situation YOU being the driver
  44. 44. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 44 Honoring your values and goals
  45. 45. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 45 Psychological Flexibility  Flexible, authentic, responsive Self
  46. 46. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 46 Psych. Flexibility Leadership skills increases
  47. 47. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 47 How does it work ?
  48. 48. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 48 Identity = { 3 senses of self, social experiences, human ability to refer to past / future }
  49. 49. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 49 Psych. Flexibility Leadership skills Identity increases
  50. 50. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 50 „[how] a person talks about the self is the act of creating an identity“ [Atkins & Styles, 2015] Identity
  51. 51. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 51 „[how] a person talks about the self is the act of creating an identity“ „… [identity] is not a reflection of some underlying true self.“ [Atkins & Styles, 2015] Identity
  52. 52. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 52 Main driver for Identity: Language [Relational Frame Theory (RFT), Hayes et al. (2001)]
  53. 53. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 53 Psych. Flexibility Leadership skills Identity Language creates increases
  54. 54. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 54 Where to start ?
  55. 55. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 55 Talking & learning about the 3 Selves is a (self-)coaching intervention [Berger & Atkins, 2009]
  56. 56. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 56 Self-talk
  57. 57. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 57 proce ss story pers pecti ve
  58. 58. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 58
  59. 59. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 59 Which examples of self-talk come to your mind?
  60. 60. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 60 Where did it make a difference how you talked to yourself?
  61. 61. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 61
  62. 62. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 62 Best possible Selves (take-home exercise) [King, 2001; Blickhan, 2015]
  63. 63. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 63 • 4 days (best) in a row • 20 minutes per day • 1 life domain per day (health, work, partner/family, friends, treating yourself, …) Best Possible Self – in a nutshell 1
  64. 64. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 64 • first minutes: step mentally into your future best possible self in that life domain • ~15 minutes: be your best possible self • Write continuously • How are you? • What do you do? • What is important to you? • Don‘t stop writing! • Don‘t judge. • Be surprised! Best Possible Self – in a nutshell 2
  65. 65. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 65 pro- cess pers pecti ve story
  66. 66. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 66 Mindfulness
  67. 67. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 67 Mindfulness = focussed attention + witnessing awareness
  68. 68. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 68 Mindfulness Psych. Flexibility Leadership skills Identity Language creates increases facilitates
  69. 69. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 69 pro- cess pers pecti ve story Mind- ful- ness
  70. 70. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 70 pro- cess pers pecti ve story Mind- ful- ness
  71. 71. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 71 pro- cess pers pecti ve story Mind- ful- ness
  72. 72. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 72 pro- cess pers pecti ve story Mind- ful- ness
  73. 73. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 73 process story Mind- ful- ness pers pecti ve
  74. 74. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 74 process story pers pecti ve Mind- ful- ness
  75. 75. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 75 process story pers- pective Mind- ful- ness
  76. 76. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 76
  77. 77. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 77 Do one thing at a time [Hartley, 2017]
  78. 78. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 78 Do one thing at a time (take-home daily exercise) [Hartley, 2017]
  79. 79. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 79 Adding details [Hartley, 2017]
  80. 80. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 80
  81. 81. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 81 Trust YOUR SELF and grow
  82. 82. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 82 Leadership starts with your SELF
  83. 83. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 83 Cosima Laube blog.cosima-laube.de Twitter: @gazebo_c
  84. 84. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 84 Sources on the „Multiple Selves“ model Atkins, P. W. B., & Styles, R. (2015). Mindfulness, identity and work: mindfulness training creates a more flexible sense of self. In J. Reb & P. W. B. Atkins (Eds.), Mindfulness in Organizations: Foundations, research, and applications (pp. 133–162). https://www.researchgate.net/publication/290490487_Mindfulness_identity_and_work_Mi ndfulness_training_creates_a_more_flexible_sense_of_self Atkins, P. W. B., & Parker, S. K. (2012). Understanding Individual Compassion in Organizations: The Role of Appraisals and Psychological Flexibility. Academy of Management Review, 37(4), 524–546. https://doi.org/10.5465/amr.2010.0490 Hayes, S. C., Barnes-Holmes, D., & Roche, B. (2001). Relational Frame Theory: A Post- Skinnerian Account of Human Language and Cognition. New York: Plenum Press. https://doi.org/10.1016/S0065-2407(02)80063-5 Berger, J. G. and Atkins, P. W. B. (2009). Mapping complexity of mind: using the subject- object interview in coaching. Coaching: An International Journal of Theory, Research and Practice, 2 (1), 23-36. https://www.researchgate.net/publication/233282213_Mapping_complexity_of_mind_Usin g_the_subject-object_interview_in_coaching
  85. 85. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 85 Sources on Mindfulness, Work and Leadership Good, D. J., Lyddy, C. J., Glomb, T. M., Bono, J. E., Brown, K. W., Duffy, M. K., Lazar, S. W. (2016). Contemplating Mindfulness at Work: An Integrative Review. Journal of Management, 42(1), 114–142. https://doi.org/10.1177/0149206315617003 Shapiro, S. L., Carlson, L. E., Astin, J. A., & Freedman, B. (2006). Mechanisms of mindfulness. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 62(3), 373–386. https://doi.org/10.1002/jclp.20237 Dahl, C. J., Lutz, A., & Davidson, R. J. (2015). Reconstructing and deconstructing the self: cognitive mechanisms in meditation practice. Trends in Cognitive Sciences, 19(9), 515–523. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.tics.2015.07.001 van Dierendonck, D. (2011). Servant Leadership: A Review and Synthesis. Journal of Management, 37(4), 1228–1261. https://doi.org/10.1177/0149206310380462 Systematic iterature review on Mindfulness and Leadership (Bachelor thesis, Cosima Laube 2017) – available on demand
  86. 86. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 86 Sources on Listening, Positive Psychology & more Listening and Clean Language • Hartley, Tamsin(2017): The Listening Space – A New Path to Personal Discovery Positive Psychology • Blickhan, D. (2015). Positive Psychologie: ein Handbuch für die Praxis. Paderborn: Junfermann Verlag. Best Possible Selves Exercise • King, L. A. (2001). The health benefits of writing about life goals. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 27(7), 798–807. doi: 10.1177/0146167201 277003, https://www.researchgate.net/publication/247895325_The_Health_Benefits_of_Writing _about_Life_Goals • See pages 152/153 in Blickhan (2015) for a short description in German Karate Kid: Wax on, Wax off • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ynryUjGFt8
  87. 87. Agile Budapest & StretchCon Meetup CraftConf 2018 Created by Cosima Laube (CC BY-NC-SA 4.0) 87 Picture sources & credits slide 8,10: https://twitter.com/TheRealSheldonC slide 14, 24, 43-47: Cosima Laube slide 62/65: photos from illustrations taken from the German version of the book „Quiet the self“ by Matthew Johnstone (therefore not included in public versions of these slides!) all others: http://unsplash.com

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