1. STAY CALM, LISTEN, AND OFFER REASSURANCE
Be a role model. Children will react to and follow your reactions. They learn from your
example.
Be aware of how you talk about COVID-19. Your discussion about COVID-19 can increase or
decrease your child's fear. If true, remind your child that your family is healthy, and you are
going to do everything within your power to keep loved ones safe and well. Carefully listen or
have them draw or write out their thoughts and feelings and respond with truth and
reassurance.
Explain social distancing. Children probably don’t fully understand why parents/guardians
aren’t allowing them to be with friends. Tell your child that your family is following the guidelines
of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), which include social distancing.
Social distancing means staying away from others until the risk of contracting COVID-19 is
under control. Showing older children the "flatten the curve" charts will help them grasp the
significance of social distancing. Explain that while we don't know how long it will take to "flatten
the curve" to reduce the number of those infected, we do know that this is a critical time—we
must follow the guidelines of health experts to do our part.
Demonstrate deep breathing. Deep breathing is a valuable tool for calming the nervous
system. Do breathing exercises with your children.
Focus on the positive. Celebrate having more time to spend as a family. Make it as fun as
possible. Do family projects. Organize belongings, create masterpieces. Sing, laugh, and go
outside, if possible, to connect with nature and get needed exercise. Allow older children to
connect with their friends virtually.
Establish and maintain a daily routine. Keeping a regular schedule provides a sense of
control, predictability, calm, and well-being. It also helps children and other family members
respect others’ need for quiet or uninterrupted time and when they can connect with friends
virtually.
Identify projects that might help others. This could include: writing letters to the neighbors or
others who might be stuck at home alone or to healthcare workers; sending positive messages
over social media; or reading a favorite children’s book on a social media platform for younger
children to hear.
Offer lots of love and affection.
TAKE TIME TO TALK
Let your children's questions guide you. Answer their questions truthfully, but don't offer
unnecessary details or facts. Don't avoid giving them the information that experts indicate as
crucial to your children's well-being. Often, children and youth do not talk about their concerns
because they are confused or don't want to worry loved ones. Younger children absorb scary
information in waves. They ask questions, listen, play, and then repeat the cycle. Children
always feel empowered if they can control some aspects of their life. A sense of control
reduces fear.
STAY CONNECTED TO SCHOOL
Locate learning resources. Schools’ capacity to conduct virtual learning experiences will
vary greatly, but most schools are providing lessons and learning activities for children
to do. Take advantage of the many companies and online platforms currently offering
free learning opportunities.
Identify additional resources. Know if your school or district is providing additional
resources, such meals, or technology, such as a laptop or tablet.
2. Stay in touch. Find out how the school is communicating with families and students. Be
sure to read any communications you receive. Check with you children, particularly
older ones, as they may be receiving information directly that would be helpful for you to
know.
Connect with school staff. Reach out to your child’s teacher and other relevant school
staff if you have concerns about their coping and keeping up with assignments or
activities.
MODEL BASIC HYGIENE AND HEALTHY LIFESTYLE
PRACTICES
Practice daily good hygiene. Encourage your child to practice these simple steps to prevent
spreading the virus.
Wash your hands multiple times a day for 20 seconds. Singing “Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star” or
“Happy Birthday” twice is about 20 seconds.
Compliment your children when they use a Kleenex or sneeze or cough into the bend of their
elbow. Teach them the importance of throwing away used tissues immediately after sneezing
or coughing.
Sadly, handshakes and hugs need to be limited to immediate family members, at least for
now.
Foster a sense of control. Offering guidance on what your child/children can do to prevent
infection offers them a greater sense of control, which reduces anxiety.
Build the immune system. Encourage your child to eat a balanced diet, get enough sleep,
and exercise regularly; this will help them develop a robust immune system to fight off illness.
Parenting has always been tough, but home schooling,
working from home, and all the financial uncertainty
surrounding COVID-19 has made it even tougher. These
parenting tips can help you cope.
The unique stresses facing parents during COVID-19
With many schools and workplaces closed due to the coronavirus pandemic,
many of us have found ourselves dealing with a new, and often very stressful,
family situation. As well as having to work from home and run the household,
you’re likely also trying to keep your kids on track with their virtual school work—
all while enduring the restrictions of social distancing and even being cut off from
the support of friends and loved ones. With the whole family often occupying the
same space day after day, the strain can seem unrelenting. If you or your spouse
3. have been furloughed or lost your source of income, the financial pressure can
add even more stress. Left unchecked, that can be a recipe for burnout.
As a parent at this time, it’s easy to feel that you have so many roles to fulfill that
you can’t possibly perform any of them well. But it’s important to remind yourself
that this is a unique situation, a global health emergency that none of us have
had to face before. Don’t beat yourself up if you’re not functioning at your usual
standard. This can apply to your quality of work, your upkeep of the home, or
your ability to keep your kids focused on their schoolwork. By going easy on
yourself and following these tips for maintaining a sense of balance, you can
keep your stress levels in check and make each day a little easier for your
family—and for yourself.
Helping your kids with online classes and schoolwork
The coronavirus pandemic has thrown many of us into the role of de facto
homeschool teacher. In addition to all your other responsibilities, you may be
finding it difficult to keep your children on track or helping them with assignments,
especially if they’re in different grades. Keep in mind that this is a stressful time
for kids as well, and that it’s normal for them to regress or act out in ways they
normally wouldn’t. Going easy on your kids can help reduce their stress levels as
well as your own.
Join forces with other parents. Reach out safely or via phone, email, or social
media and exchange tips for keeping kids focused and engaged. Depending on
the restrictions in your area, you may also want to organize a virtual activity or
study group, which has the added bonus of providing social interaction for your
child. Collaborating with other parents may help you feel less isolated as well.
Connect with your child’s teacher. Remember, they’re also getting through this
by trial and error. If your child’s school is still closed, be honest about what is
working with home tutoring and what isn’t. Your child’s teacher has a good
understanding of their academic strengths and weaknesses, so they may be able
to help you come up with a more individualized learning plan.
4. Create a learning routine. A routine gives kids a sense of normalcy during an
otherwise uncertain time. But you don’t have to go crazy with color-coded
schedules if that’s not your style. Just create a general outline that you think you
can maintain on most days that still leaves room for flexibility and down-time. If
possible, try to designate a workspace for each member of the family.
Set goals—and celebrate their completion. Since so much has been stripped
from our everyday lives, having something to look forward to can help kids stay
motivated. Setting up small rewards, like watching an episode of a favorite TV
show, can help them tackle that unpleasant math assignment. Get the whole
family in on it. If you all set a few goals and plan breaks together, your kids will
see that you’re a team.
Practice vulnerability (and encourage your kids to do the same)
Let’s face it: these are less-than-ideal circumstances, and at some point, conflict
at home is bound to happen. When you feel your frustration starting to build, take
a time out and try to separate yourself before the situation escalates. If you do
lose your temper, wait for everyone to calm down and then apologize. Be honest
with your kids and let them know when you’re feeling overwhelmed. At the same
time, encourage them to be honest about their feelings and frustrations.
Talk at an age-appropriate level. If your child is young, don’t volunteer too
much information, as this could cause their imagination to run wild. Instead, try to
answer any questions they might have. It’s okay not to know everything; if your
child is older, help them find accurate information from the U.S. Centers for
Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) or World Health Organization (WHO).
Answer questions simply and honestly. If your child has questions about the
pandemic, know that honesty is always the best policy. While you don’t want to
frighten young children, there’s nothing wrong with talking about the need for
taking safety precautions such as social distancing and washing their hands.
Be understanding. If you’re forced to quarantine as a family, your child will be
disappointed at not being able to see friends or visit with other family members.
5. Be receptive to this. Explain to them that you understand their disappointment,
and you are missing out on friendships and special occasions as well.
Keeping healthy routines
As the pandemic drags on, it can be easy to neglect your normal daily routines.
But structure and consistency are important for kids. Maintaining regular
mealtimes and bedtimes, for example, can help your child feel safe and secure.
Establish healthy new routines. As you readjust to a new normal, you may
need to establish new daily schedules for your kids. Even if things like bedtimes
have changed without school every day, try to be consistent and follow the same
schedule each day. Make time for activities such as exercise, family dinners, and
household chores as well as time for your child to socialize with friends, whether
that’s done safely in person or online.
Follow safety advice. With different areas facing different restrictions, it’s
important to follow the advice of trustworthy sources such as the CDC, WHO,
and your local public health authorities. Playgrounds, schoolyards, and parks are
all high-contact areas where your children should follow your instructions about
keeping themselves and others safe. That may mean wearing a mask,
maintaining social distancing, and regularly washing their hands.
Reinforce the importance of hygiene and handwashing. Hand washing might
have been a boring, mundane task in 2019, but now it can be a life-saving
measure. Get your child into the routine of washing their hands every time
they’ve been outside or come into contact with other people. To encourage the
habit in young children, make up a song to the melody of one of your child’s
favorites and sing it together while they wash their hands.
Managing behavior problems
Often, when children misbehave, it’s a reaction to the amount of stress they’re
under and a way to vent their frustration. Try to keep this in mind when acting as
a disciplinarian during these difficult times—and do your best to remain calm.
Start by managing your own stress levels through exercise, a healthy lifestyle,
making time for fun, and adopting a regular relaxation practice. The calmer and
more relaxed you are, the better you’ll be able to handle your child’s reactions to
stress.
These positive disciplinary tips can also help:
6. Redirect your child. If your child is misbehaving, redirect them to
another activity, such as playing outside or reading a book. As a parent,
you can sometimes tell when your younger child is beginning to get
restless. Take the opportunity to distract them with an interesting task or
a fun game and you can curtail bad behavior before it starts.
Take a breath. There are plenty of ways to relieve stress in the
moment when you feel like you are losing patience with your child. For
example, take deep breaths and count to ten to allow yourself to calm
down. Then you can respond to your child’s behavior in a calmer and
more positive manner.
Give your child a creative consequence. For a timely example, if your
child goes outside without a mask, ask them to draw a picture of a child
wearing a mask or a picture of your family with masks on. Creative
consequences simultaneously engage your child while also teaching
them that their behavior was wrong.
Reward good behaviors, such as doing well on a school assignment,
making their bed, taking out the trash, or getting along with their siblings.
In normal circumstances, you might not reward this kind of behavior, but
during this stressful time, nothing positive should go unrecognized.
Never yell at or spank your child. Losing your temper in this way will
only damage your relationship and impact your child’s sense of safety
and security.
Sometimes, it may be best to do nothing. Ignoring bad behavior can
be an extremely effective tool when trying to get your child to stop doing
something. When a young child is looking for attention, not giving it to
them can make them realize that they should either stop or find a more
respectful way of finding attention.
Monitoring your child’s social media use
At this time of social distancing and isolation, many of us—and our kids—are
relying on the Internet and social media to keep in touch with friends and family
and up to date on the news. While it has many positive aspects, social media can
also negatively affect your child’s levels of stress, anxiety, and uncertainty.
If you’re worried about your child’s social media use, you may be tempted to
simply limit their access to their phone or other devices. But that can create
further problems, separating your child from their friends when they need them
7. most. Instead, there are other ways to monitor their online activities and help
them use social media in more responsible ways.
Parenting teens
Dealing with the pandemic can be especially tough on adolescents, who are
missing out on key moments in their young lives. Many are spending long
periods separated from their friends and are missing important school events
such as exams, dances, and graduations. While the teen years are always
difficult, your child may be even more angsty, moody, or defiant at the moment
than is normal for their age.
Of course, connecting with teenagers is rarely easy. You may despair over how
much your teen withdraws from you or how hard it is to communicate with them,
but that doesn’t mean they don’t still need your attention, advice, and love. When
trying to get your teen to open up and talk to you, keep the conversation light at
first. Stick to topics you know they’ll enjoy, such as their favorite artists, sports
teams, movies, authors, or friends rather than subjects where you’ll likely
disagree. Once you’re chatting, you can move on to more difficult subjects such
as the pandemic and other things going on in their life.
Spending extra time with your teen can help them to open up and confide in you.
Try:
Cooking and eating together. Cooking one of your teen’s favorite
meals with them offers an opportunity to talk about what’s going on in
their life. Try to schedule dinners around the table with no distractions
from phones, the TV, or other devices so you can talk as a family.
Gardening together. Gardening is a great way to keep a tight bond, as
it’s a fairly docile activity that gives time to talk and strengthen a parent-
child bond.
Playing sports or exercising together. Many teenagers love
to engage themselves physically, whether it be time spent playing
sports, working out in the gym, or going on a run. Try shooting hoops,
kicking a soccer ball, throwing a frisbee, or playing golf or tennis. When
done together, it proves to be a great source of stress relief as well as
an opportunity to bond.
Empathize with their frustrations. Be empathetic about the things that
they’ve been forced to give up due to the pandemic. Validate their feelings
and listen without trying to convince them that they’ll be fine or reminding
8. them that others have it worse. Sharing your own disappointments and
frustrations will put you on the same team. If restrictions in your area make
it difficult for your kids to see their friends in person, encourage them to be
creative with how they interact virtually.
Encourage mindfulness
Authors: Kai Lundgren and Robert Segal, M.A.
Address children's fears
Keep healthy routines
Use positive discipline
As a parent, you want to do everything you can to protect your child.
We know parents are struggling to balance work, child care and
self-care while keeping worries — both your children’s and your
own — under control. You don’t have to do it alone.
For many parents, home in the age of COVID-19 has become the office, the
classroom, even the gym
Many parents are struggling to not only keep their children occupied, but also
to oversee schooling, even as they telework, grocery shop and perform all the
other daily necessities of family life. At the same time, children may be
reacting to stress by acting out or regressing to behaviors long outgrown.
Tips from APA
Acknowledge your emotions
9. It’s normal to feel fearful, anxious or stressed now. Discuss your experiences
with relatives and friends or share a laugh. If you continue to experience
problems, try a telehealth consultation with a mental health professional.
Set boundaries
Boundaries blur when work and home life occur at the same place, making it
more difficult to get things done or disconnect from work. To help, designate a
specific area to work in, ideally a room with a door.
Also designate an area for schoolwork and homework. If you don’t have a
home office, consider setting up your children’s homework space alongside
your workspace. That way, you can model how to work productively.
Try setting a kitchen timer for 90 minutes and tell children you’ll spend 15
minutes doing something fun with them when the buzzer goes off. When
children know the plan, they’re less likely to interrupt your work.
Thank your child for allowing you to do your work. Threats, such as loss of
screen time, are far less effective.
Establish a routine
It’s unrealistic to think you and your children will put in normal hours during
this stressful time.
But it’s important to maintain a routine, even if children are getting or staying
up later than usual. Routines help family members cope with stress and be
more resilient. Post a written schedule of when you expect children to get up,
do schoolwork, eat meals, play and go to bed. Also include times dedicated to
your own work.
Remember not every hour needs to be scheduled. Allow for flexibility, play
and free time.
Relax screen time rules
Don’t feel guilty about allowing more screen time than usual. You might allow
your child to watch a movie or play a video game while you complete a work
task, for example. Or help your child stay connected to friends via
videoconferencing or multi-player video games.
Don’t forego the rules entirely. Younger children should use a computer or
tablet in common spaces rather than their rooms so that parents can monitor
content. With teens, talk about appropriate content and screen time limits.
10. Communicate with supervisors and co-
workers
Explain your situation to your supervisor and colleagues. They may be
unaware you’re juggling work and home-schooling.
Negotiate with your boss about schedules and expectations. Work together to
craft a plan that works for both you and your employer. Perhaps you can
agree that you’ll focus on home-schooling in the morning but be available for
calls in the afternoon, for instance.
Share responsibilities
If there’s another parent or caregiver in your home, negotiate child-care shifts.
You might oversee schoolwork in the morning while your partner works, then
trade off in the afternoon.
Get help from people beyond your home, too. Ask a grandparent or friend to
video-chat with your child while you make an important work call, for example.
Or trade off organizing virtual play dates with a neighbor, which can not only
keep your children busy while you work but help them maintain friendships.
Practice self-care
You—and everyone else in your family—need alone time every day. Take a
walk, enjoy a long shower or just sit in your car. If you can’t get away
physically, put in earbuds and practice mindfulness meditation via your phone.
And practice self-compassion. Don’t worry if you can’t concentrate or let
housekeeping standards slide. During this stressful time, it’s important to go
easy on your children and yourself.
Source: https://www.apa.org/topics/covid-19/parenting-during-pandemic
Even in the best of times, parenting is a juggling act.
Recent studies reveal working parents are experiencing mounting levels of stress as
they grapple with choices about their work-life balance, the future of their children’s
education, and how to keep their families safe from coronavirus.
Researches:
11. Sixty-three percent of parents said they felt they had lost emotional
support during the pandemic. According to a study from Harvard’s
Graduate School of Education, 61 percent of parents of 5, 6 and 7 year
olds in Massachusetts agreed or strongly agreed that they felt
“nervous, anxious, or on edge” because of the pandemic.
One study of nearly 2,000 pregnant women showed that 37 percent
were showing clinically significant levels of depression, and 57 percent
were showing clinically significant levels of anxiety. (Lebel et.al.,
2020)
Over the course of the pandemic, the biggest stressor for parents
surveyed by the University of Oregon’s RAPID-EC project has been an
inability to sufficientlyfeed, clothe and house their children, said
Philip Fisher, Ph.D., the director for the Center of Translational
Neuroscience at the university
1. the first important thing for parents to do is to listen.
2. Something we should keep in mind is how vital peer interactions
and relationships are for developing children, and in particular,
young children.
3. know that it will vary from child to child what works best in
terms of setting up online play dates or other social experiences.
4. First and foremost, all children misbehave, especiallywhen tired,
hungry, confused, or frustrated. As counterintuitive as it may
seem, the best way to dissuade behaviors we don’t want to see is
to reinforce behaviors we do want to see.
Research tells us that our parenting is influenced by our own psychological
resources, the characteristics of our children, and our networks of social
support.
Parents are being asked to juggle childcare, work, financial insecurities, our
personal health, and the health of our families. It is important for parents to
have patience with themselves.
12. Additionally, there are evidenced-based treatments for improving mental
health, including psychotherapy, medication, mindfulness meditation, and
more.
Source: http://www.bu.edu/articles/2020/how-to-parent-during-a-pandemic/
19. These are uncertaintimes.
Godis close and isour refuge inthe midst of the storms and catastrophes that we face.
God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love and self-control (2 Tim. 1:
7) that enables us to face circumstances with confidence and in complete peace
(Isaiah 26: 3).
We are living through a period of deep disruption, chaos and anxiety. The things
and people we hold most dear have been separated from us and the normal
order of life has been utterly upended. The prophet Elijah was in a similar place.
Rejected by his people, chased by his government, he was the last prophet in the
land of Israel. Lonely and afraid, disconnected and heartbroken, Elijah waits for
God. As we navigate this pandemic, may we remember the absolute tenderness
and perpetual closeness of God. In all the chaos and fear, God is always close
enough that we can hear the divine whisper in our hearts.
God of silence and stillness, we trust you are with us in this time of noise and
chaos. We pray for an end to this pandemic. Whisper your words of comfort,
encouragement and hope to all who need them in these days of fear. Draw
close to those who are sick and all those who risk illness, caring for them,
protecting and uplifting them. In Your name, we pray. Amen.
Romans 8:28 is often quoted during times of trial and difficulty: “And we know that for those who love
God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.
Psalm 34:17-18 says, “When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all
their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.
And we know in John’s gospel that when Jesus heard of his friend Lazarus’s death, and when he
saw Lazarus’s family and friends weeping, “he was deeply moved in his spirit and greatly troubled,”
and that “Jesus wept” with them (John 11:33-35).
Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28)
20. In the midst of the pandemic lies the reassuring voice of God
God allowed Job to be stripped of everything that was precious to him — loved
ones, possessions, and health. How could a good God permit such a thing? In
the Book of Job, the response is complex but the point that emerges is clear:
God’s goodness offers no guarantee that God will shield individuals from
suffering.
God is often likened to a loving, devoted parent.
Within that internal whisper can be found the still, small, reassuring voice of God.
While we are following guidelines such as washing our hands, no hand shaking,
covering our coughs, “social distancing,” etc., we also need to rely on the Lord.
1. #1: Be on the lookoutfor the unexpectedwaysGod might be working in the crisis.
We fixate onwhatwe have lost — our routines,ourplans,freedomof movement,
maybe evenourjobs.Imaginingthe goodthatmightcome out of our current situation
comeslesseasilytous.Yet,whenwe lookbackthrough the historyof God's dealings
withhumanity,we see thatGodhas broughtgood forthfromevil time andagain.
2. Welcome thismomentas a time of Sabbath rest.
3. Refocuson what is most important in life. Inthe eyesof the virus, we are all equal.
Use mealstimes to know your childrenmore
4. Spendtime withGod in prayer.
Lessons to be Learned
1. First, we should face this and every crisis that comes our way
with courage. Our marriage vows include the phrase “in sickness or in
health.” Our commitment to God demands no less. What I speak of is
the kind of unreasoning, paralyzing, despair-provoking fear that robs us
of all hope, peace, and confidence in a future.
2. Second, COVID-19 does not release us from our obligations as
Christ followers. Our discipleship is not contingent upon
circumstances. The Golden Rule was not suspended. That means that
hording or fighting over that last roll of toilet paper at Walmart is not
only socially unacceptable behavior, but also blatantly unchristian
21. conduct that must have no part in us. Generosity continues to be an
obligation.
How can one be happy when everybody’s sad?
A story of an anthropologist and he was studying little kids.
He got a basket full of sweets, placed it under a tree. Then he
gathered the kids about 200 meters away. And he told the
kids: whoever runs to that basket and reaches to that basket
first will get all the sweets. And he was so shocked to see the
kids, when they found out, they held hands…all of them and
then they ran towards that basket at the same time, they
arrived to the basket at the same time and then they divided
the sweets among themselves. Then the antropologists went to
the kids and asked them: Why did’nt anyone of you run alone
as fast as he could so he could get all those sweets. And the
kids, they answered him in this way: How can one be happy if
everybody else is sad? Wow! And then the anthropologist
discovered that they have this cultural ethics at least in that
area. That everyone is one, is equal. You have to share
because we are responsible to one another. You know the gift
of this crisis , the gift that we need to receive is simply
that…that we need now to rise up and care for the people.
3. Third, the Christian life is one of sacrifice. That goes double in
times like these. Christ commands his followers to take up their
crosses daily. We must be the ones who set the example for others. We
may be called upon to sacrifice our comfort, our personal resources, our
money, or maybe even ourhealth and safety.
4. Fourth, with sacrifice comes an element of risk. We are
promised eternal life. We are NOT promised an earthly life free of
sickness, discomfort, or pain. Nor are we promised long life on this
earth. In fact, sometimes to be obedient to Christ means risking our very
lives.
So as we face this crisis together, we continue to pray. We continue to
worship, if only in our homes or remotely via the internet. We do our
best to model the kind of prudent actions that our medical authorities
have urged us to take.
22. 5. “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances;
for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you” (1 Thessalonians 5:16–
17)
6. God has not promised
7.
Will ourbeliefsholdupif ourexperience of life getsworse? Will we still believe whatwe believe today
if we lose our healthandwell-being? Whataboutif all our assetsshouldvanish,ashappenstopeoplein
economicdepressions,asmighthappentous if we don’tfix climate change? Whatabout if those who
love usfindusimpossible tolivewith? Will ourfundamental beliefschange?
