...

1. Black
Black is the color,
Of many layers.
Some say it's evilness,
Others say it's sadness.
I believe it represents,
All those unfortunate events,
Like losing a dear friend,
Or give yourself an end.
For Black, hope is gone,
No more reason to move on.
One last chance for redemption,
To get passed this forbidden passion.
Black seems cold but we know better,
Behind the shadows, something's lighter.
It doesn't exist to bring offense,
It's purpose is to maintain the balance.
Red and White, it fights them both,
The white old man and the evil goat.
On judgment day, Black will choose,
Who gets to live and who gets to lose.
I think Armageddon is on it's way,
We might live it some other day.
One last thing I need to say,
Black is here to stay.
And slay...
Author's Notes: Following this is an image which displays quite well, in my opinion, the
Black, the White and the Red in the poem. Credits and respect to the creator of the image.
By the way, all poems are in order of creation. Surely…

2. A Lost Dream
Sometimes, I wake up from a dream,
A dream so real my heart beats faster.
In my head, I try to remember,
Those words she said before her scream.
I dream of her every now and then,
Desperately wanting to see her again.
Most of the time I end up on my own,
Watching the fading night all alone.
She may look different each time,
But I know she's the same inside.
No matter how hard I try,
I always wish meeting her eyes.
A stupid dream and a perfect illusion,
Why does she bring so much confusion.
I hope this craving won't last longer,
Otherwise, I'll need to fight her.
In the end, it won't even matter,
I lost a dream, I lost her...
Alec.
Author's Notes: This is another early poem of mine. All I can (should) say is that it
happened. More than once.
Also, I wrote a second part to this, unpoetic, just describing one of the dreams. I’ll keep it
to myself, though…

3. Crimson
It's funny how a glass of wine can change a night,
This red drink that makes everything alright.
I know it changes the way I see,
But it becomes more beautiful, at least, for me.
All I want to do is go away for a moment,
Just to know if I'm important.
I do fear not coming back,
That's the cost to see black.
This may sound a little weird,
I would like to be feared.
By every human on this earth,
I would swear being born to hurt.
Guess again, I'm not the worst,
Only searching for a burst.
Feeling the touch of the endless thirst,
For I shall embrace the Crimson Curse...
Alec.
Author's notes: Cold Red Wine(CRW) is my favorite drink. This is poem number trois. I'd
like to say that since I have discovered this website(thanks T.) and started posting my
poems, I had the pleasure to rediscover them, for I seem to completely forget about them. It
is as if I didn't write them. The feeling can be compared to eat something you haven't eaten
in years. It's oh so tasty and quite familiar. Brings blurry memories. Cheers...

4. Nightmare
Me-Who are you?
Him-I am you as a child.
Me-What do you want?
Him-To show you.
Me-Show me what?
Him-Yourself.
Me-What should I see then?
Him-Who you are.
Me-I see nothing.
Him-You see me.
Me-You are nothing?
Him-I am you.
Me-Who am I?
Him-A nightmare.
The little boy wakes up in sweat. It's midnight. He opens the light and sits on his bed,
shaking. He feels something changed. It's darker. Inside of him. Inside of me...
Alec.
Author's Notes: This one...Sometimes, one's mind has a peculiar way to reason. It can
question itself, searching for answers. I tried to replicate that form of inner-discussion. I
don't think I succeeded fully but this is it.

5. You & I: Part One
I found this letter on the floor of my new bedroom. Here it goes.
To you, my beloved me.
I don't remember the first time I saw you. I was told you were little and blue. You didn't
speak alot. People stared at you. I don't remember those days. From what I know, we first
met when you were five. You went away. Butt I followed you. Where everything was new,
you had me. We were alone for a couple of weeks. And the came the little friends of yours.
You left me alone in the dark. They took you away from me. I was crying for you to come
back. You feared me. I tried to hold you back but you screamed. One day, you came back.
And we were friends again. Only us two for ever. Sadly, it didn't last. A year or so after our
reunion, you left me again. Now, I try to make you see I need you. We were met to be
together. Shame on me for letting you go. Now you made me angry and I'll follow you. I'm
sorry to be, but I need to know. Since when did you feel the need to speak? Think about me
and I'll come back for you. Believe me when I say so, ffor I will always be your foe.
Mine truly, your despised you...
Alec.
You & I: Part Two
Sleepless, I take a walk in the woods. The midnight moon is showing me the way. Away
from you, I think about us. No wonder why I'm a little lost. In the woods, the animals are
walking besides me. Sharing my torments, drinking my tears. Fear of the dark. I love the
scare. The way home is behind me now. This drug pushing me deeper into the hole. Hold
me down before I scream. Dreams of terror. This letter I give to you. This fever that is my
burden. Fallen from the sky, Angels deserve to live. I am not. Hands behind me catching
my past. Feeling my wrath, my eyes, they. Fall, the dead leafs are more alive than me.
These colors I don't see, these smiles I don't bring. Don't jump into my heart. In which,
you'll fail. Hail to the king before he flies. Drink the red wine after the claws. Words are
here to witness my finally. Any time, my lips are red. God is in me. Free him from me. I
see the hole. Your face of horror. Your mouth of cold. Sorry for the mistake. I should have
closed the door. At least now, we are together. With The...
Alec.

6. Answer This
When the questions are forgotten and the answers vanished,
Only one thing is left.
Madness.
When the questions vanished and the answers are forgotten, Only one thing is left.
Truth.
It is unclear which path you will take,
Which one you will know that you take and
Which one really leads to knowledge.
One thing is sure. There will be a price to
Pay.
Nightmares love me,
Dreams want me.
Who am I,
To be such desired?
Am I some kind of monster,
Or just a bad thinker?
Am I a sinner,
Or just a wrong follower?
Should I stay in this house,
Or just run away in the dead woods?
May the answer to that question stay unclear,
For I want to stay here and wish to be there,
Or stay there and wish to be here.
Stupidity or Prophecy?
You tell me...
Alec.
Author's Notes: I made this one quite later than the last poem. Between them, I was writing
my thoughts using full sentences and no cutting at all. Unlike the last one, the questions
were not directed to myself but toward the Reader. Now, I guess it is You.

7. Mixed Feelings
Tears for the lost,
Screams for this day.
Red brings lust,
Green is the way.
Bones buried under a stone,
The brightness of the life above.
From the ashes, it will grow,
Feeding on the sleeping crow.
Tomorrow's past is a doubtful present,
Today's future is a fearful accident.
Thoughts falling through her mind,
Truth hiding from all mankind.
Sister that I never had,
Telling her why I am sad.
Memories passing by her eyes,
Illusions of a last goodbye.
Foul I am for holding your hand,
Death I wish for letting it go.
Again...
Author's Notes: Is there a pattern to Madness? The opposite?

8. Suicide Is For Killers
My humble friend, you have come to a rest,
At ending lifes, you were truly the best.
I followed your wishes and your last request,
Your wife was, in my bed, the last guest.
You told me to take care of Heather,
And that's what I did while I screwed her.
She's happy now, don't bother,
In Hell, you are reunited together.
Spending your life dodging bullets,
I grew old selling toilets.
For me, it's as good as it gets,
For you, I'm a load of crap in baskets.
Forgive me David, for I am a Sinner,
Forget the memories, for you are a Killer.
Maybe next time, you'll see further,
Oh, I forgot, you're dead, Brother.
They won't find a letter since I never wrote it,
They will find a picture of us smoking near the pit.
Right now, I'm staring at your slave's dead eyes,
Kissing her blue lips, telling my last goodbyes.
Ironic how everyone of us dies,
Because of a friend with a few deadly lies.
I pulled the trigger,
You were the Soldier,
I was the Sinner,
We are cadavers.
I can now understand that bullets are for Soldiers and Sinners,
Just as suicide is for Killers and Wife Screwers...
Author's Notes: The eternal fight for the last word. It seems pointless when, in the end,
both fighters will be in coffins, Lady Death standing tall above them, whispering the Last
Word.

9. Burning Gaze
She seems distant, somewhat distracted,
Her ice grey eyes somehow tainted.
Is she thinking about her forgotten past,
Or about an old flame that still lasts.
Why bother if there is always another,
I just hope I won't ever lose her.
While she's standing, surrounded by the night,
I can help but admire such outstanding sight.
There are no words to describe the harmony,
Between The Darkness' and her incomparable beauty.
Forever may not be long enough for me,
For I wish this moment could go on eternally.
I wonder if I should ask her her name,
Maybe she won't say it, playing a game.
Of course, she will win since she is better,
As long as she stays, losing doesn't matter.
Strange how cold her touch feels on my skin,
When the simple thought of her burns my heart like a sin.
Slighty smiling, she whispers in my ear,
Her name, she tells me, is a secret to fear.
I ask her to tell me, a deadly curiosity,
Waiting for an answer, I stare silently.
Suddenly, there is sadness in her glance,
A change in her usually fearless stance.
Kissing her away, a familiar taste meets my lips,
From her eyes is where the Crimson River drips.
I see in that a sign which is so dreadful,
Yet it is strangely the most beautiful.
Returning to her world filled with Broken Screams,
She looks back at me and fades like a dream...
Author's Notes: Her. Again.

10. Last Sleep
Speechless while looking at your picture,
Reflectionless while staring into a mirror.
Fearless while facing the creature,
Saneless while seeing you in a blurr.
A single thought,
And one more dance.
A pitiful stop,
And no more chance.
Shameless for what I did to my own flesh,
Careless for the dripping blood, still fresh.
Lifeless for every profanity I whisper,
Restless for you I will be forever.
A wakening of anger,
And you leave just before.
A day of reckoning,
And I come back for more.
Leave me be,
Or let me see.
A single leak,
To the truth I seek.
An answer so deep,
It would be my last sleep...
Author's Notes: Highlights are useful sometimes. Same for Tags. I can perceive in the
poem a universal question that remains still unanswered (and proven).

11. The End Of You
To the one I miss,
And wish he could read this.
Wearing the pain of your loss,
Crying away every good memory.
Holding tightly my wooden cross,
Knowing your coffin is empty.
Things will get better with time,
Thoughts of death will vanish.
Treason won't solve your crime,
Truth is you deserved to perish.
A gift for my dead lover,
A hint for you to discover.
A message from your neighbor,
A word about why he's better.
A poison only you could savour,
A glass of death for my favorite sinner.
I hope you read the letter my dear,
And realize how much we shared the same manners.
Yes, it's my fragrance you smell on the paper,
Oh no, is that the sound of silence I hear.
Is the end of you the saddest tragedy.
Is my heart hurting so much I cannot stand it.
I hope you are still dreaming about me in your eternal sleep.
I dit it because I love no one more than you.
Wake up, my dear, while I'm bleeding tears.
Dying to see me, you live only when you sleep.
Follow me...
Author's Notes: This one means alot. I think I just now understand what it means. It's hard
to say goodbye to a character you've dreamed then written about. I realize as of now that
this poem was written through someone else's perspective. Didn't know I could do that. It's
a goodbye letter. For the Writer(Moi). From the Written(Elle). Follow me.... Where is
She?

12. Armageddon
Life is about pain and suffering,
About joy and sharing.
About all those times you cried,
About the day the world died.
Every good thing must come to an end,
It is true when you lose a good friend.
It is also true when you cut your hand,
Every bad thing must come to an end.
Living to die and dying to live,
No one should leave in a fatal drive.
No one should end in an aforethought dive,
Someone must care about who dies and lives.
Yesterday was another regret,
Today is the time to hope and prey.
Tomorrow will be or won't be anyway,
Finally, we shall know life's biggest secret.
Death...
Here It comes.
Author's Notes: I have dreamed about the end of the world. It's beautifully scary, and quite
epic. Yet it felt utterly wrong. Hope it all doesn't end as soon as they say. If so, then so be
it.

13. Happy &…
Never fail to end a war,
Never dare to break the wall.
Never try to understand you,
Never die to finally see you.
Never yours...
Hear me whispering my fatal secrets,
Hear me screaming my eternal madness.
Hear me calling endlessly for your name,
Hear me shouting above the voices in my brain.
Hear me now...
Tell me life is more than this,
Tell me we'll at least once kiss.
Tell me death is my own bliss,
Tell me I'll finally leave the abyss.
Tell me a lie...
End the world to find peace,
End the agony on your knees.
End the worse with a prayer,
End the better with a curse.
End me...
A good soul would never deny,
Nor passion nor desire,
In these tears I make you cry,
Killing fashion, blazing fire,
A single word will make it worth,
Love shall make us both Happy and Hurt...
...Hurt.
Author's Notes: I believe this belongs in The Sadness simply because the message is
quite sad. Yet there is Hope. There is...

14. Revelations
My dear, shed a tear...
The Dead is rising.
The World is changing.
The Face is grinning.
The Blood is flooding.
For it's near, I fear...
Diamond eyes, together we fall.
Whispered silence, as one we faint.
Filling us with light, the sun's embrace.
For I fear, my dear...
Kneel before he who sees.
His touch, the blessing of You.
Prey before he who breathes.
His words, the sinning of Him.
Shed a tear, it's near...
Here he stands.
Shadow upon darkness.
Smoke upon flame.
Hell upon us.
The Demon has risen.
I shall return to dust.
His face, his taste.
I remember Him!
He's Me, says Him.
He's You, says You.
I'm Him, says Him.
I'm Him, says You.
I remember You!
Diamond. Tears.
Silence. Death.
Light. Hope.
You. Love.
Him. Hatred.
Me...
...Him...
...Us.
Author's Notes: The Demon Within. This seems to serve as an introduction to It (Him). There is
also more to it.

15. One Last Night (The Door)
Walking among the sinful people,
I feel those eyes burning my soul.
Young children with sadistic ways,
Can't stop remembering the old days.
Running back to the home that was,
The seesaw swinging like it always does.
In this place we used to gather and play,
Now filled with sad whispers and decay.
Closing my eyes, I can see my deceased mother,
She smiles, happy, giving me a mirror.
Crying, I fear what I could see,
A reflection of the demon I can be.
Opening my eyes to face my own darkness,
I see I fell asleep surrounded by the mess.
Closing the door, leaving the past,
I stand alone, the one, the last...
Author's Notes: This one was created feb 2006. I changed a few lines and added a second
title. I enjoy reading what I have done, and remember the state of mind I was in back then.
I sincerely hope you enjoy it.

16. Window
Window.
Through all the years of winter and snow,
I've watched you everyday walk by my window.
Hoping, just once, to meet your eyes,
Dreaming, every night, to steal your cries.
My heart, a shield, can't you just see through,
My drug, you are, cannot live without you.
To you, my feelings are a complete mystery,
To me, they are the source of a deep misery.
Thank you for giving me the strenght to stay,
Trust me, with you gone, there's no sunny day.
My heart, a shield, can't you just see through,
My drug, you are, cannot live without you.
Time is running, it's the first time you're late,
Did something happen, I guess I should wait.
The sun is rising, I really must go,
Goodnight, my queen, and see you tomorrow.
My heart, a shield, can't you just see through,
My drug, you are, cannot live without you.
Today, for the first time, we get to meet,
Finally, between us, less than six feet.
I brought some flowers, black roses they are,
Unfitting, I know, yet they came with a card.
My heart, a shield, can't you just see through,
My drug, you are, cannot live without you.
I must tell you something, please don't be upset,
I am in love with you, that is my secret.
Not being there for you, is my only regret.
What he did to you, I will never forget,
My heart, a pain, I had to cut through,
My love, you are, I can finally hold you.
One last thing, I want you to know,
From now on, wherever you go,
there will always be an open window...
Author's Notes: Longest poem I've created. March second 2006. I had to edit part of it. Partly inspired by
the movie Secret Window (with Johnny Depp), the movie being based off a Stephen King short story
called Secret Window, Secret Garden. Yet it doesn't have much in common with the actual poem. Enjoy.

17. (Prison) Game (Over)
Heartwrenching is the blade.
Slicing inward in the shade.
Of all the mistakes I've made.
In Prison, the price paid.
Remorse.
Soon, I will fly free.
Like a bird below the sea.
Drowning in the liquid fee.
Turning once the Prison key...
Hope.
Now the sun rises above.
Smiling, baring wings of dove.
NO!
A hand from below,
My feathers turned black
I shall feed off your shadow!
In Hell's Prison, you're back!
Retribution.
As the Prison door closes.
And the Demon Snake hisses.
I see the ghostly faces.
Rolling the red dices.
Prison.
They play the Game.
For vengeance, in hate.
Choosing my fate.
My soul, they gain.
Game.
Ripping my flesh.
Craving for more.
Pain does not matter.
When life is.
Finally.
Over?
Author's Notes: This is a new poem as it was made just now. I'm a little rusty, I
admit...When is Justice really served?

18. Human Shell/Mourning Elle
Human Shell
A ghost of another world came to me,
Begging for me to set him free.
Funny how I came to be,
The only one who dared see.
Human's Hell
A question, he asked, changed everything,
Answering, I tried, but said nothing.
Strange how I was becoming,
The truth I wasn't believing.
Change
A final end to a life I despise,
Turning away from hateful eyes.
Ironic how my love, every night, cries,
The mourning will not stop until she dies.
Morning Hell
When she will be ready, I shall be there,
I will find a way to free her elsewhere.
Then, the ghost I am will have to share,
The dark secret I can no longer bear.
My Love, you were never There...Mourning Elle
Author's Notes: The last poem about Her(Elle) that has been written. Strange how in the
first part, it's not even about her. Oh and it's also the very last old poem. I was hesitant
about posting it but I think it deserves a place among my other ones. I also added the last
line.

19. Author's Notes: Yes, the notes come first this once. I absolutely didn't want to post this
poem. Why? It's so un-me. Yes, it's a love poem. Now you get why it's so...un-moi. I don't
like it. You might not like it. I'll expect at least one awwwwwwwww. Where's my puke
bucket? Here it is (and for your personnal information, her name was Vivian):
Vi…
Today, I have lost a friend,
She went away, abrupt end.
Sadly, all my fault again,
I am the shadow of a man.
Yesterday, so happy together,
A dream could not have been better.
Honestly, I wish I've told her,
She was more precious than any treasure.
Tomorrow, she'll know the truth about me,
That because of her, I'm once again happy.
Ironically, happy is what I wish for her to be,
Yet too late for her to listen and see.
That there is nothing else that I would rather be,
Than the smile maker, a name she gave me.
The last thing I want to say is really corny,
But still,
I'm sorry,
Vi...

20. Chapter One: About Temper
I didn't fight to become like this.
Didn't want it.
Sort of.
So here's the story of how it came to be.
Fiction to explain reality. Like it should be.
The door shattered, revealing to scared Al a monster oh so familiar.
Scars never heal when they are made in the mind....by the mind.
-You! Get away! I'm happy! I'm happy! Listen to me!-
I am the creature which fed you the strenght. And I am taking it back for the good of the
land.
The creature known as Will walks slowly toward Al. Al feels understanding as it makes his
bones tremble.
-Not yet! No! It is not fair! He's had his chance! Look at me! I'm smiling!-
monstruous hands seize Al by the neck, lifting him to his feet.
Look at me truly, Al. Tell me, my friend, why do you fear the god known as Balance?
Terrified, Al cries, not even trying to resist.
-You're breaking everything again, everything you gave me, Will! To what purpose? What
do YOU gain in this?-
Will laughs, fanged mouth widely opened, red tears gleaming in the corner of his eyes.
God is back from vacation. My reward is simple and priceless. I only want a little rest.
Now you may rest, Al.
Al's widening eyes shut as the creature known as Will shoves his clawed hand in Al's heart.
A squeeze later, Will walks away, toward the other room, whistling.
That was very easy. Now, here comes the harder part. Waking up Lex...I don't know if
what they say is true about being in a coma. Are you conscious? Dreaming? Oh well,
questions are not meant to be asked my me. I'm just old Will, an ordinary man with a good
set of teeth...
The End (of that chapter)

21. Back In The Day
It's hard to go back,
When all around is black.
Like a needle in a haystack,
Hard to find what you lack.
Moving among the dead,
A feeling of dread.
Alone with the brightness,
Minding my steps.
Am I swimming in water,
Or dreaming in slumber?
For now and forever...
Shouldn't feel right,
Being the only light,
Racing on through the night.
Find a way!
Stop running away!
As night fades to day,
Masked demonds come to play.
A yellow house out of the dark,
Hope carries me closer,
I notice I'm flying,
As I am raised, off my feet.
Kids are gigling
In my brain, something
Snapping,
A yellow door opening,
An old man staring,
His face questioning,
His gaze hypnotizing,
Myself wondering,
My hands spreading,
As I sing...
Trick or Treat.

22. Three Faces/Phases
...From The Dark
Yelling DON'T TOUCH ME
Because everytime you do,
It burns my sight ever more.
Without hesitation, I would have jumped,
With little remorse would I fall,
In her delicate embrance.
A child who smiles in the dark,
At all the eyes glimmering for him.
His mind, his heart, his soul,
The Broken,
The Fallen.
The Entity.
The decadence of the shade,
Holds a message in my taste,
A warning born in sin:
You do not belong with the living...
...For you are an empty grave.
And thus the choice was made.
A mirror broken.
A tear grinned away.
And so shall begin,
My endless journey,
To The Tower...
Somewhere, behind a curtain,
Razor sharp fangs of silver form a grin,
A feeling so terrible the King would tremble,
Could this monster be the key?
OPENING THE DOOR FOR THE END OF ME.

23. Farewell
This was sent to me some years ago by a very close friend,
Whom is no longer of this world...
Dear friend, truth be told, I'm not a saint.
Wasn't hard to slip and slide,
As I fell in love with her.
Wanted to give her all,
But I, myself, couldn't break,
My self-made wall.
Man, I apologize to you.
I'm sorry I screwed it up.
I'm sorry I messed you up.
I'm sorry I didn't fuck her down.
Yeah, always goes back to M & E.
So how's it going in your country?
Do you still mange le merde de chat?
Good Times, dude, before she came to be,
Back when the first one loved us both.
Time is running out,
Night is fading out,
Before you pass out,
Know that I'll always have you in my heart,
In my mind,
In my soul,
Somewhere...
Cheer up, bro!
This is a new dawn, a
Chance to right the wrong.
We'll meet again,
And when we do,
I ought to see a grin,
You silly spinach chin!
Take it easy,
Make it groovy,
There's plenty,
Of the womanly,
For you, batsy,
Enough about we.
Now, I die free.
Peace and Chili.
Your best buddy,
Serenity.

24. The Truth (About Masturbation)
No more!
(See you tomorrow)
The spiders of truth crawling in my bed,
As my hand touches creation.
Bite me hard,
Watch me scream tears,
All those dark eyes,
Such sight to engulf,
Into bitterness.
Through my head.
It's a conflict, my friend.
It's a war, fading to end.
Grinning, smiling, appealing,
I know.
Abstract, simple-crafted mindtwists.
Never quite good enough to relieve(relive),
Yet my hands try again.
It's the true meaning of being touched.
I think often of you and,
The Nature of things.
That carries us on,
Off,
Apart.
See, I'm back again.
No new beginning.
Just doomed to repeat my end.
The pulsion to use my hand.
The desire to relieve the tension.
The end of thought as I crave attention.
So lonely, no pure feeling.
So damn tired of the wheel.
My mind drips on the ground.
Things fade some more.
And then I reach truth.
And I can only feel.

25. Feel it change me inside.
Feels horribly good.
I better myself,
To become stronger,
As I take the fall.
How many wheels are left?
I'm starting to feel numb.
I just made a big mess with myself.
Time to clean and cover everything up.
Noone should know of what I do at night.
Except the spiders.
They know.
Crawling on my soul.
Trapping my heart,
In a web of truth.
Sticky mess...

26. The Reaper’s Trance
You make me so warm inside,
Replacing the cold,
Take my hand,
More than a friend,
Let us turn to gold,
As long as we don't hide,
From each other.
I hold you in my arms,
Mind,
And Heart.
Just want to raise you to the sky,
The angel that fell from up high.
Broken, we see each other,
Moan and whisper.
Dream as my fingers wander,
Inside your caving wonder.
I hope for a blister,
That in your slumber,
It hurts you closer.
Drawing you against me,
Tongue out, poisoning me,
Fucking you fucking me,
Like a fool, like me,
Turn away, fear me,
I'll crave you more,
Want you more,
Fuck you more,
Bite you so hard,
You'll scream in delightful misery,
Be the Queen Bitch of Pulsation's Thirst!
Be the monster sitting on me,
And feed me the power,
To lay you over,
And fall into you,
Drawing your destiny,
With my finger's course.
There, over you, grinning,
Into your mouth, blood spilling,

27. Embrace the flames, you're mine.
Tears, FEED US, as we shine,
Together for a moment,
In our crimson shrine.
The terrible mascarade...
Of the lost and mad!
Consuming existence,
Oblivious presence,
Darknened essence,
The Reaper's Trance.
If you wake up,
I'll kill you.

28. Come, She
What is evolution.
Is it changing for the better?
Or for the sake of living harder?
What is my path.
A new step to take.
Some hearts to break.
And mistakes to make.
The smiles I fake.
The Vampire she'll stake.
I was born to feel.
Bending monsters to my heel.
Shatter the truth I reveal.
And turn this dream real.
I drink to your memory,
To your face and your agony,
My disgrace, inner tyranny,
Your embrace,
come back to me.
In this pace,
I'm not free.
Fucking insane,
All is blurry,
Can't even think right,
It's surely misery.
Or a test before I leave.
I'm not ready to go,
I'm too thirsty to scream.
In this time of need,
All I want is to feed.
I've seeked and sinked into darkness,
Searching for you, my lover in distress,
And time and time and FUCKING time again,
To the disapointment, no end.
Silently, I weep back to sleep,
Are you still waiting,
In me, the hole's deep?
I WANT TO KEEP DREAMING!

29. To satisfy my thirst,
Unless I burst,
I shall kiss the glass,
And the night shall pass.
A new dawn will caress me,
As I whisper in your memory,
I'm still mourning her, She,
She of my heart and timeless tragedy.
Hear me crawl in the cemetary,
For our love that felt free.
I'm not lying,
She loved Me.
And I love She.
She, the Angel who fell for Me.

30. Someday…
I hurt myself today, to see if I still feel…
Time and time again,
You are hurt and feel pain.
You are sad and feel ashamed.
You are mad and feel in vain.
You.
But But But, I yell back.
Fighting the terrible fact.
That ALL is fading.
Even the little I have.
I am a naïve soul.
I hope for greatness.
But my view is everchanging.
Worsening.
Seeing better is a reward.
Worth the candle’s burn.
But humanity has tipped the balance.
And away from the mirror,
My head does turn.
Twice have I truly been graced.
By life’s adorable gift.
Good’s powerful source,
Has filled me.
Terribly,
Graced.
Yet in all the atrocity,
Of living for you and me.
There is, after all, beauty.
A flower, a smile,
A woken dream.
Carry me to warm worlds,
As I watch you sleep.
My hand touches your cheek,
As you deeply breathe.
You are alive.
Life is we.
Someday…

31. Final Words: So here we are. You and I. Four years of words. This was pretty much all of
my stuff. I know I’ve started writing poems when I was 14, in my school agenda. I wonder
if I still have it…Anyway, four years of growth, pain, happiness and many inches. I didn’t
bother writing notes in the latter ones only because they really express a common idea
slash feeling slash state of mind. I guess notes can be seen as silly and egocentric, as if my
stuff was worthy of notes! Art is subjective, though…right? I don’t mind if you dislike it. I
hope you take time to give some feedback. In case you were wondering, more shall come
in due time. So here I go, leaving you with this. Words may be beautiful, but they are only
a medium. Feel before you Read.
Ta Ta,
“Alec Brood”.