How to write with content points for composition writing

Dear Parents, Thank you for taking time to come
for this Teacher-Parent Conference 2012.
Please note the following:
We are to make the best of the 10 minutes allocated to think of
ways to bring the best out of our pupils.
Questions to think about while you are waiting for your turn.
•Have you received emails from Mr Abel Kok recently about the
SA1 results matters? Like class average and Top pupils average?
•Are you aware of the class blog and Edmodo site which contain
learning resources?
•Are there any concerns for the child’s learning? Let’s work hand
in hand and help the child to improve for the next round of
assessment.

Important URLs to note:
sgteacher6-7.tumblr.com (for class 6-7)

Password : english

edmodo.com

Mr Abel Kok’s email address:
sgteacher2005@gmail.com

Please note that the following slides are
meant for both parents and pupils.
Objectives:
•Parents are able to offer help and assistance to pupils to write a better piece of
composition with more content points.
•Pupils are able to recap on what they have learned in class pertaining to composition
writing.
Steps to take:
1) Read the question prompt
2) Study the 2 sample compositions' content points
3) Appreciate the disparity and difference in the number and
quality in the content points
4) Aim to write at least 10 content points for all composition
writing or writing practices.
5) Parents and children are to discover the joy of shaping of the
story together.

Read this question prompt
You promised your sister to look after her goldfish
for her when she was away for a few days. On the
day your sister was to return, you discovered that
one of her goldfish had died.

Additional prompts:
4.Where your sister had gone
5.How you felt when you see the dead fish
6.What happened in the end

Sample composition 1
• My sister, Sue, would be going on a school exchange
programme programme at Malacca for three days. She had
decided to let me take care of your goldfishes during her
absence.
• “I owe you one and I will definitely buy you a souvenir from
Malacca,” my sister said with a broad smile before she left
for Malacca. I tried to shower the fishes with extreme care
and concern. However, I did not know how the right
amount of fish food to give to her fishes. After the first few
days of feeding the fishes, the water became murky and
clouded with excess fish food. I knew I was in for it when
one of the fishes died. I felt a shiver down my spine and
prepared for a dressing down from my sister when she
returned from her trip.

Sample composition 1 (continuation)
• When my sister returned home from Malacca,
she was very upset with the death of her
favourite goldfish. I lowered my head and
apologised profusely. She reprimanded me
severely and refused to talk to me for many
weeks. Of course, she did not hand me the
souvenir which she had bought for me as she
was still fuming mad. This experience was
etched vividly in my mind till today.
(197 words)

Sample composition 2
• My sister, Sue, looked at her pet goldfishes swimming gracefully in the fish
tank. They were small goldfishes, which would grow more than two times
its size in the months to come. Sue was no stranger to this species of fish
because our aunt, whom she visited often, had a much bigger Bubble Eye
goldfish. She had watched that one grow from a little fish into a large and
graceful creature.
• As Sue looked at the little fishes swimming up and down their small,
cramped tank, she had finally made up her mind to entrust them to my
care as she was going on a school exchange programme at Malacca for
three days. She pleaded with me to take good care of it and even gave me
a long list of instructions like feeding times and when to give the tank a
change of water. Hesitantly, I agreed because I was busy with my
preparation for the coming PSLE examinations. However, I did not want to
disappoint my sister especially when she had so much faith in me to hand
me her beloved and precious pets under my charge. Usually, she took such
extreme care of her goldfishes that she would not even allow me to go
near it, not to mention, feeding them. I appreciated the trust that she had
in me and I agreed to do my utmost best.

Sample composition 2 (Continuation)
• “I owe you one and I will definitely buy you a
souvenir from Malacca,” my sister said grinning
from ear to ear. I took the list of instructions and
followed her instructions meticulously on the
first day. However, disaster struck on the second
day! Two of my friends came over to my place to
study for the coming examinations together.
While I was in the kitchen, one of them was
fascinated by the fishes and decided to feed
them. Both of them were utterly intrigued and
amazed by the lovely goldfishes and continued to
feed them repeatedly.

• “This is so much fun!” exclaimed Ben, one of my
classmates. Hearing the din at the living room, I smelt a rat.
I bolted to the living room and was petrified with the scene
which was total chaos. I knew I was in for it when I saw that
the fish feed had clouded the water.
• “Stop!” I vociferated at the top of my voice but to no avail.
The two of them continued to create mayhem. By the time
I managed to pin the main culprit on the floor and snatched
the bottle of fish feed from him, the fishes were doomed.
All of them swam in a funny, hilarious way due to the over-
feeding. When one of the goldfishes actually turned belly
up, I felt a shiver down my spine and prepared for a
dressing down from my sister when she returned from her
trip.

• On the day of her return, I felt an albatross around my neck. I initially
wanted to buy her a goldfish to replace the dead one secretly but my
mother who knew about the matter told me, “Honesty is the best policy.” I
stared at the door knob waiting for it to turn to signal the start of a tsunami
wave of blame. When it turned, my heart actually missed a beat. I inhaled a
deep breath and almost burst into tears.
• To my surprise, my sister ran towards me and gave me a big hug. Later that I
know, Mother had called her to inform her of how distraught and sorry I was
over the death of her pet goldfish and it was my friends who are to be
blamed, not me. I was relieved that it ended this way. With my tears welled
up in my eyes, I apologised to my sister, “I’m so sorry.” My sister just told
me with words as soft as rain, “It’s alright, let’s let bygones be bygones.” She
handed me the souvenir from Malacca which was a keychain that reads,
“Honesty is the best policy.” I was utterly lost for words and I was glad to
have heeded my mother’s advice. From that day on, my sister even allowed
me to feed the fishes during the weekends. Honesty did pay off handsomely,
we grew much closer and had lots of fun in front of the fish tank.

Summary
• In order to score for Content, the pupil is
expected to write a well developed story that
goes beyond the points given in the question.
• The focus of the composition should not be on
the introduction (Setting) or conclusion,
rather, it must be on the Problem as
described in the picture prompt or situational
prompt.
• Plan at least 10 content points before you
begin your writing proper. (Parents please
ensure this from your child)

Comparison of the content points
Composition 1 Composition 2
•My sister wanted me to take care of •My sister wanted me to take care of your pet while she was
your pet while she was away. away.
•Tried to take good care of the fishes •I followed the instructions very closely on the first day.
but did not know the correct amount
of fish food to give to the fishes. •On the second day, some friends came over and overfed the
•One of the fishes died. fishes.
•My sister came home and •I tried to stop them but it was too late.
reprimanded me for the lost of her •One of the fishes died.
fish.
•Felt apologetic and wanted to get a replacement for my
sister.
•I told my mother about it but she advised not to do it.
•My sister came home and did not blame me for the matter
as my mother had already explained to her over the phone.
•I was relieved that the matter ended this way.
•My sister and I became closer after this incident.

Now try this question with your
child …
You were walking home one day from school
when you saw a mysterious looking bag under
a tree. You decided to take a closer look.

Additional prompts:
4.What you did next
5.What was in the bag
6.What happened in the end

How to write with content points for composition writing

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