Unmute Yourself: A Women's History Month Event at L'Oreal

L’Oréal | The Power of Us

March 10, 2022
With Terri Trespicio

In 1983, pretzels
at school cost 10
cents.

But I could not
speak up and ask
for it.

Could. Not.

“Stop searching for your
passion” 7 mill+ views
I got over it.

…and what doesn’t it mean?
What does it mean to speak up?

If I speak, I can
• Contribute to the convo

• Be seen, heard and
acknowledged

• Raise my profile and establish
myself
• I can’t get a word in?

• I’m judged or criticized or I say
something wrong?

• It makes me look bad?
But what if…

Reasons people don’t speak up
• I’m not qualified.

• Someone else knows better.

• No one “needs” me to say anything.

• I don’t want to make it about me.

• I don’t want to look bad.

Speaking is a superpower.
…but it’s not just for superheroes.

It’s a power that can be used to
support—and a tool for inclusion.

When you speak up, you give other
people the courage to do the same.

Another reason? It’s better for
your team and your organization.

Copyright © 2020 Terri Trespicio All rights reserved.
territrespicio.com/getit
What makes for the
most effective team?
Google did a study to find
out…

They assumed an ideal mix of
skills and traits was the answer.
They were wrong.

The Five Keys to a Successful Google Team, Julia
Rozovsky, Google People Operations | November 17, 2015
Who is on a team matters less than
how the team members interact,
structure their work, and view
their contributions.
“

Feeling secure enough to
contribute was the most
common feature, by far, of
high-performing teams.
 
“ Why Is It So Hard to Speak Up at Work? By
Ruchika Tulshyan, New York Times, March 15, 2021

The effort you make to create a
secure and supportive environment
contributes to excellence.
What that means:

Suggesting half-formed ideas

Taking risks

Proposing solutions
Keys to innovation
Why Is It So Hard to Speak Up at Work? By
Ruchika Tulshyan, New York Times, March 15, 2021

territrespicio.com/getit Copyright © 2020 Terri Trespicio All rights reserved.
The Power of Us
When we speak up, we send a
message that every voice counts.

I used to work
as an editor for
this woman.

Today I’m a writer, speaker,
and brand advisor.

I help people advocate for
their businesses, their
ideas, themselves.

unfollowyourpassion.com
“An especially meaningful
and much-needed read as the
workplace continues to
change in the wake of the
COVID-19 pandemic.”
Booklist

unfollowyourpassion.com
“One of the best feel-
good books of 2021”
Washington Post

Get it!
Want the deck & free resource list?

Um is this thing on?

Men tend to be rewarded for
standing out, showing status.
 
Women tend to be rewarded for
playing down their achievements
and being inclusive.
Fact!

McKinsey and LeanIn.org surveyed 329
companies and more than 68,000 employees.
 
Half the women surveyed have been
interrupted or talked over in meetings.
 
Around 40 percent watched other people
take credit for their ideas.
2019 Women in the Workplace
Report

We can’t have expectations
of men if we can’t raise those
expectations for ourselves.

There is no growth or
progression without
trust

There’s something that tells
women that being seen is unsafe.
 
(Try a million years of
experience.)

Mindset shift
What i
f
…
Speaking up weren’t about being
a star, but being of service?

Mindset shift
What i
f
…
Discussions were how we discovered
ideas, rather than where we judged them?

Mindset shift
What i
f
…
Your job was to provide raw
material, instead of p0lished ideas?

Mindset shift
What i
f
…
Your job as a leader wasn’t to
f
ix but to recognize?

Think of your next virtual meeting as a
puzzle that everyone is there to solve.
Each team member holds uni
q
ue
pieces to that puzzle, based on their
different expertise and experience.
“
How to Overcome Your Fear of Speaking Up in Meetings, Harvard
Business Review by Tijs Besieux, Amy C. Edmondson, and Femke de
Vries, June 11, 2021

This is not a

zero-sum game.
You can go beyond being heard, to having impact—

and help others do the same.

Strategies
for speaking up

First, do not disclaim.
It does not endear you. It’s not
effective. It looks bad on everyone.

Do not disclaim.
“I just”

“I think”

“I don’t know if”

“I’m not sure if anyone agrees with me”

“Maybe I’m alone here on this”

“This is just my opinion, but”

“I’m sorry”

How do I speak without
interrupting?
Q.

It’s an irregular, ongoing, living thing.
Conversations disrupt themselves!
A conversation is not a monolith.

Seeing yourself as
“interrupting” assumes
you’re not part of the
conversation.

“Interrupt”

“Interrupt”
to stop or break the
continuity of

Pop in with praise
“Chris, I love what you just said
—I’d like to add a thought while
we’re on the topic…”

Pass the mic
Invite someone else to share
their thoughts and ideas.
 
(Prepare them ahead of time!)

“While we’re on this topic, I want to give
Jen a chance to weigh in on this. Jen?”
Pass the mic

•They think they know what you’re going to say

•They think they can save time

•They’re trying to “help”

•They don’t want to be questioned

•They don’t want to lose the floor
Why do people interrupt
you?

Hold your ground
(keep talking)
“Bob, let me wrap up this point and
then I’ll hand off to you…”

OR! Pause and pick back up
[Wait til they take a breath, or come to
the end of a sentence, then]

“One point before we move on from
this…”

How can I come across as
assertive, not aggressive?
Q.
Let’s look at those words
more closely.

Aggressive: Ready to attack


Assertive: Con
f
ident & direct


Participation does not
equal aggression.

Reflect back & add on
Let the speaker know they’ve
been heard.

“Joe, I hear you saying that…. I’ll add
this…”

Call out what’s working
This isn’t just a great way to
contribute; it builds team morale.

Getting someone else to feel something is
strategy.
 
But when your own feelings get in the
way, it’s static on the line.
How emotions work for
and against us.

Channel passion.

Elicit emotion.

Tolerate some tension.
Resist the urge to cave on the spot or fill
the space.

Use silence to your advantage.

I’m afraid of saying something
incorrect.
Q. You don’t have to be infallible to say
something worthwhile.

Calculators are 100% correct. Leaders have
insights, hunches, ideas. They take risks.

Listen like a leader.
You don’t have to talk all the time to
have an impact.
 
The more closely you listen, the
more you’ll have to say.

It’s possible to take your turn
on purpose…It’s possible to
change your approach and to
choose to take your turn.
Seth Godin, What to Do When It’s Your Turn
territrespicio.com/5ways Copyright © 2020 Terri Trespicio All rights reserved.
“

You’ve heard (ad nauseum) to get

OUT of your comfort zone.
I disagree.

People don’t need feedback.
They need attention to what
they do best.
Marcus Buckingham and Ashley Goodall, “The Feedback
Fallacy,” Harvard Business Review (April 2019)
“

can hinder collaboration

and innovation
Focusing only on flaws

How often do you tell
people what they’re doing
right?

Take us very far out of our
comfort zones, and our brains
stop paying attention to
anything other than surviving
the experience.
“

We learn most in our comfort
zones.…It’s where we’re most
open to possibility, most
creative, insightful, and
productive.
“

How do we access the brilliant,
creative, generous, not-anxious
part of us?
So.

We have create the
conditions for it.

Our relationship to the page began
a long time ago.

This is where
we were
conditioned to
distrust
ourselves (and
each other).

Squeeze
We call it the

Let’s get on
the same page.

This is a methodology created by
Suzanne Kingsbury to help us
q
uiet the critic and amplify your
creativity and intuition.

We do it by listening to what works.

How this works

WHY this works

WHY this works
• We remove fear of criticism/judgment

• We ease the fight or flight response

• We give ourselves the chance to connect with
story, memory, intuition

• We’re given rules AND room to explore

• We create a safe container in which to listen and
share without repercussions

The Rules of Engagement

The Rules of Engagement
• No disclaiming

• No criticizing,
q
uestions, suggestions

• We focus on what works

• We stay on the page

• We refer to the “speaker,” “narrator,”
not by name

I’m going to give
you a prompt.

And you’re going
to write for just
a few minutes.

Ready?

Your prompt…
A time you decided to say
something.

How to comment
• Choose one thing you loved: a word, a
phrase, a moment

• Reflect back what you heard

• Stay on the page with the writer

OK! So where can you put
some of this into
Action?

Where can you
• Point out what’s working

• Catch someone in their moment of genius

• Advocate for someone or something

• Encourage another woman to speak

• Create a safe environment for others to share


Everyone is talented, original,

and has something important
to say.
Brenda Ueland, If You Want to Write
“

Thank you!

Unmute Yourself: A Women's History Month Event at L'Oreal

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