A Successful Negotiation

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A Successful Negotiation
Influencing and Negotiating Skills
MTL Course Topics
INFLUENCING AND
NEGOTIATING SKILLS

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MTL Course Topics
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MTL Course Topics
ARE YOU READY?
OK, LET’S START!

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MTL Course Topics
INTRODUCTION
Most negotiations that run into the buffers eventually get
back on track. This is because the forces working for a
settlement are usually stronger than those working for
breakdown. The last phase of negotiations is the period
when you are sure you cannot make any positional headway
into your opponents' territory and it is time to look at joint
solutions. When talks resume, a new atmosphere should
enter the negotiating room, one of finding joint solutions
based on principles and agreement. This does not mean that
you should make concessions. On the contrary, the last
phase of power negotiations is a time of extreme vigilance
and care for it leads ultimately to an outcome to which you
and your constituents will put your money and your name.

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MTL Course Topics
A SUCCESSFUL NEGOTIATION
There are eight ways to unfreeze stalled negotiations and
edge your way to a win-win agreement:
1. be flexible with any part of the negotiation package
2. move from positional negotiations to principled
negotiations
3. sail with the wind: go with the other side until they
change into a favourable direction
4. focus on what's important
5. be creative with solutions
6. base your solutions on principles
7. make sure you write the agreement
8. don't jump over the net too soon.

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MTL Course Topics
BE FLEXIBLE
The biggest stumbling block to getting out of stalemated
negotiations is the unwillingness of either side to be flexible.
Flexibility can be demonstrated in big or small ways:
1. Changing Your Stance. When you change your position -
without changing your basic aims - you force the other
side to re-evaluate their perceptions of you.
2. Changing The Package. If you're deadlocked on the
price of the house, you can talk about the furniture, the
fittings, the garden the removal plans.
3. Changing Your Attitude towards the other side. All sorts
of possibilities emerge when you stop seeing the other
side as opponents and think about them as partners.
Other changes include changing the team, changing the
venue, changing the timescale.

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MTL Course Topics
PRINCIPLES NOT POSITIONS
A new atmosphere should be allowed to enter the final
phase of power negotiations. Instead of the intransigence of
the position-taking of the first phase, you should now work
together to find a common basis for agreement.
1. Act as if the other side wanted to resolve the problem
by using the assumptive close: "the best way to move is
to..."
2. Give them the problem to solve. Most people love to be
given a problem to tackle. "What do you think is the
best way for us both to get out of this?"
3. Think like shipwrecked sailors. Instead of squabbling
over limited rations, realise you're in the same situation
and work it out together.

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MTL Course Topics
EDGING FORWARD
You should aim to edge forward in the last phase of power
negotiations by looking for signs of agreement.
There are five techniques that can help:
1. Summarizing: when you find yourself stalemated, a
review of where you both are can help to clarify things.
2. Testing: you can test the other side without committing
yourself: "Just for argument's sake, what if...?"
3. Benefits And Losses: you can point out to the other side
what they and you both stand to lose if agreement is not
reached.
4. Saving Face: sometimes people box themselves into a
corner and then feel they can't move from their position
without losing face. If that is the case, help them out.
5. Compromise: if you are both genuinely stuck, a
straightforward down-the-middle compromise may be a
solution.

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MTL Course Topics
SAIL WITH THE WIND
One way to break a deadlock with the other side is to stop
confronting them and get alongside them. If you focus on
their needs and explore how they can meet them, you can
wait until they start to see things from your point of view.
Then you can take them along your preferred path.
This approach requires patience on your part and a
willingness to let others work it out for themselves. Some
negotiators call this approach sailing with the wind, or
letting the other side have your way.
"Rarely is it advisable to meet prejudices and passions head-
on. Instead it is best to conform to them in order to gain
time to combat them. Know how to sail with a contrary
wind and tack until one meets a wind blowing in the right
direction." (De Felice 1778)

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MTL Course Topics
PARTNERS, NOT OPPONENTS
When we stop seeing the other side as opponents, and start
seeing them as partners, we move from win-lose thinking to
win-win thinking. A famous cricketer excelled by looking on
every bowler as "a partner who was giving me the
opportunity to score.“
Many costly negotiations of the past, such as protracted and
bitter industrial relations disputes, were due entirely to
ideological differences between the sides. They were unable
to see themselves as partners in the enterprise only as
enemies.
The Huthwaite organisation found in their research that the
more successful negotiators spent 38% of the time in a
negotiation discussing common issues, against 11% for the
less successful.

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MTL Course Topics
BREEDING BEHAVIOUR
We copy the behaviour of our partners both at home and at
work.
Why does the wife shout at her husband?
Because he shouts at her!
So, if you want to influence someone's behaviour, practice
the desired behaviour on them first:
If you want them to listen to you, listen to them first.
If you want them to acknowledge your point, acknowledge
their point first.
If you want them to understand how you feel, understand
how they feel first.
If you want them to see your point of view, see theirs first.
If you want them to agree with you, agree with them first.
Because behaviour breeds behaviour.

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MTL Course Topics
UNLOCKING BEHAVIOUR
Research into body language suggests that when someone
takes a negative stance, their body language displays
numerous signals that suggest they are no longer listening.
These signals include head down, turned-away body, frown
and the giveaway signal, crossed arms.
In social situations, where people are not using power
tactics, you can unblock such behaviour by asking them
something like: "You don't seem to like this approach. Am I
right?" and you will usually get an explanation.
In power negotiations, however, such an approach is likely
to lead to a curt: "Yes, you're right!" Instead, the best
approach is to do something to unfreeze their negative body
language, such as giving them a pencil or handing them a
proposal to read. This results in a change in negative
positioning and hopefully a change in perspective.

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MTL Course Topics
SAYING YES
The word you are looking for to conclude negotiations is the
word "yes". "Yes" becomes easier for others when...
1. we offer no resistance: "When you say your people
deserve 15%, I couldn't agree with you more. Given the
uncertain market conditions, I think they deserve
double. What are the ways we can recognize their
contribution without putting their jobs at risk?"
2. we look at the problem together
3. we list the areas we agree on
4. we explain to each other where they can gain and we
can gain
5. we stop telling them what they must, should or ought to
do and let them work it out for themselves.
"Bring them to their senses not their knees." (William Ury)

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WHAT'S IMPORTANT
It is easy to let trivial issues come between you when you
are looking for a settlement in a negotiation. Trivial issues
include arguing over small detail, interpretation of the
meaning of words ("will the increase be applied to bonuses
earned during the previous period but paid in the new
period?") and disputing the way the negotiations are being
conducted.
Progress is more likely if you focus instead on:
1. Aims: where do our separate aims cross over?
2. Principles: what things are important enough to outlast
this negotiation?
3. What Is Agreed: if you can first agree on principles then
you can argue over the detail.

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MTL Course Topics
THE ASS AND HIS SHADOW
Aesop tells the following fable.
"A rich traveller hired an ass and its owner to take him on a
long journey. The day being intensely hot the traveller
sought to rest for a while in the ass's shadow.
As this afforded protection for only one, the owner argued
that he, not the traveller, should sit in the shadow. He had
after all only hired out the ass, not its shadow.
The quarrel proceeded from angry words to violent blows,
while, unnoticed, the ass promptly galloped away.“
Moral: In quarrelling about the shadow, we often lose the
substance.

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MTL Course Topics
SADAT WENT TO ISRAEL
There are no such things as intransigent problems, only
intransigent problem-solvers. Few issues are so complex
that they cannot be solved by the application of creative
solutions.
1. get everyone working on creative solutions
2. drop former prejudices about what is and isn't possible
3. think of ideas before evaluating them: the more ideas,
the better
4. maintain a confident attitude that, in time, you will find
a way through
5. take a few risks.
Most stonewalling negotiators expect stonewalling back. If
you do the opposite of what they expect - as Egyptian
President Anwar Sadat did when he went to Israel for peace
negotiations - you disarm them by surprise.

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MTL Course Topics
SPLITTING CAMELS
A rich Arab merchant died and in his will left half of his
camels to his eldest son, one third to his middle son and one
eighth to his youngest son.
When the sons came to count the camels, there were 23.
There was no way they could split up the camels according
to their father's will, so they went to a wise woman for
advice.
The wise woman listened to their plight and then gave them
one of her own camels. She then told them to divide up the
24 camels according to their father's will.
This time the sons were able to divide the camels correctly:
the eldest son received 12, the middle son 8 and the
youngest son 3. Finding this totalled 23, they took the one
remaining camel and returned it to the wise woman.

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MTL Course Topics
PRINCIPLED SOLUTIONS
The solution you come up with at the end of negotiations
should not be based on expediency, or the need to settle at
any cost, but on some clear principles to which you both can
subscribe. That is why the latter part of power negotiations
is called "principled" negotiations.
Do this by:
1. finding out how others have resolved similar problems
2. getting an independent, third-party opinion
3. using legal guidelines
4. agreeing on the basis of an equal amount of sacrifice
and gain on both sides
5. basing the agreement on a vote, a ballot or a
referendum by the constituents.

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MTL Course Topics
THE BIGGER SLICE
Two brothers regularly argued over who received the largest
slice of their favourite cake at teatime.
"Yours is bigger than mine," complained the first.
"No, it's not. Yours is bigger than mine," complained the
second.
To avoid having to arbitrate each time in the debate,
including the impossibility of measuring exact portions, the
boys' mother hit on a solution based on principles.
"In future," she said, "one of you will cut the cake and the
other will have the first choice.“
From then on, there were no more arguments.

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MTL Course Topics
WRITE THE AGREEMENT
When you have edged your way to a solution in
negotiations, you should write down exactly how you
understand it, what exactly is involved and what exactly is
meant. You should do this even if the other side also writes
down their understanding of the agreement.
Always beware of "one-truck deals". There is a big
difference between:
"One truck for sale: £10,000"
and
"One 1998 model Bedford for sale: 12,000 miles certified on
the clock, serviced at 11,500 miles. Delivered to your home.
Price excludes tax, insurance, but includes MOT, dated
November last..."

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MTL Course Topics
DUMB IS SMART
The competitive nature of conflict that underlies power
negotiations often results in both sides trying to prove
they're more intelligent than each other. One side will use
arguments that are clever in the belief that this will win
them points.
However, there are disadvantages in appearing too clever:
1. you risk turning cleverness into a competition so that,
even if you get a bad deal, you can still say you were
cleverer
2. being smart pre-supposes that you have to win the
argument. Most successful negotiations are not won on
the arguments alone but on a range of other factors.
3. being clever prevents you asking "dumb" questions in
case you appear stupid. This makes you vulnerable to
deals which must be carefully checked out.
Dumb is smart and smart is dumb.

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MTL Course Topics
SIGNS OF AGREEMENT
You need to be sure that the other side is happy with the
agreement you've reached or it may not be sold to their
constituents and your deal will fall through.
Signs of agreement can be seen in subtle changes in
people's body language:
1. they visibly relax: they may lean back in their chairs, use
more open gestures, smile more. A man may open his
jacket buttons.
2. there is greater eye contact
3. people move closer
4. they may remove their glasses.
"People in their handling of affairs often fail when they are
about to succeed. If one remains as careful at the end as
one was at the beginning, there will be no failure." (Lao Tzu,
600BC)

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THE RIGHT MENTAL STATE
When we approach the last phase of power negotiations,
particularly if they have been long and tough, it is easy to
change our mental state.
We tend to ease off, relax, think about after the agreement,
give ourselves a pat on the back. But these feelings are
dangerous because they replace the tough, unyielding and
business-like approach that we need until the very end.
So,...
1. when they suggest agreement is close, don't believe
them
2. when you start to feel euphoric, rein in the feeling and
replace it by being even tougher
3. when everyone else is getting ready to go home, don't
drop your guard
4. when they start to relax because they think you are
near agreement, use their weakness to extract more
concessions.

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MTL Course Topics
IT'S NOT OVER UNTIL...
The closer you get to an agreement, the more vulnerable
you can be to the tactics of power negotiators who may
detect your euphoria and eagerness to settle.
These tactics include:
1. shaking hands before the agreement's written up and
then discovering minor additions you hadn't expected
2. minor sweeteners, "so we can sell it to our people"
3. their slipping small issues in which you won't have the
nerve to contest for fear of being seen to be a deal-
wrecker
4. their wording the agreement in their favour
5. leaving details vague
6. re-opening major stumbling blocks while you're in a
good mood
7. nibbles and salamis.

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TASK-ORIENTED THOUGHTS
Throughout any negotiation, you will develop task-oriented
thoughts which focus on the issues, arguments and state of
play, and self-oriented thoughts, which focus on how well
you're doing. Towards the end of negotiations, there is a
tendency to stop thinking task-oriented thoughts and
instead think self-oriented thoughts often about how well
you've done.
This is like the sports star who reaches the last round, the
last set or the last hole in a winning position and lets his or
her thoughts wander to success. These thoughts are not just
premature; they distract from concentrating on the job. The
history of sport is littered with stories of failure at the very
last gasp.
To counter this danger, use the trigger of self-oriented
thinking to direct you back into task-oriented thinking until
the negotiations are over.

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SALAMI
Matyas Rakosis, one-time head of the Hungarian Communist
party is credited with this definition of the "salami"
technique at the end of power negotiations.
"When you want to get hold of a salami sausage which your
opponents are strenuously defending, you must not grab at
it. You must start by carving yourself a very thin slice. The
owner of the salami will hardly notice or, if he does, not
mind very much. The next day you will carve another slice,
then still another. And so, little by little, the salami will pass
into your possession.“
It is not easy to resist the salami technique if in your mind
you have told yourself that the negotiations are over and
have started to exchange pleasantries. The only way to
avoid it happening is to stay business-like until you are sure
the negotiations are at an end.

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MTL Course Topics
THAT’S
IT!
WELL DONE!

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MTL Course Topics
THANK YOU
This has been a Slide Topic from Manage Train Learn

A Successful Negotiation

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