This document provides tips for being an active listener, such as making eye contact, nodding to show engagement, avoiding distractions, asking questions to prompt further discussion, and maintaining confidentiality. It also cautions against interrupting, oversharing personal stories, staring intensely, planning your own response instead of listening fully, prying for private details, and offering unrealistic enthusiasm.

1. Do Don’t
Eliminate distractions and make eye contact
with the speaker.
Stare so intently that you make the speaker
uncomfortable.
Nod or use other cues to show you’re
listening.
Interrupt or change the subject.
Show empathy. Share your own related stories unless you’re
asked.
Listen objectively while the person is
speaking.
Plan your own response while they are
speaking and fail to hear everything.
Follow the speaker’s lead regarding how
much they wish to reveal.
Pry, or try to get the speaker to divulge things
that are too personal.
Restate the speaker’s points, if needed, to
make sure you understood correctly.
Continuously repeat the speaker word-for-
word.
Ask questions to prompt the speaker to think
about possible alternatives.
Offer your own opinions, unless you have
expertise that will help provide a solution.
Encourage the speaker and be optimistic. Be unrealistic or offer false enthusiasm.
Ensure confidentiality. Repeat to anyone what you were told in
secrecy.