3. Be Involved with ISM
Programming
PARENT SURVEY IN NAVIANCE (NOW)
ATTEND MOCK ADMISSIONS SESSIONS (FEB.
2014)
ENCOURAGE YOUR CHILD TO ATTEND
WORKSHOPS:
ESSAY WRITING
COMMON APPLICATION
MOCK ADMISSIONS
USE NAVIANCE!!
4. Be Involved with ISM
Programming
USE GOOGLE CALENDARS:
HS COUNSELING PROGRAMMING
COLLEGE VISITS
SUBSCRIBE ON THE HS COUNSELING BLOG:
HTTP://GUIDANCE.ISM-ONLINE.ORG/
5. Be Involved with ISM
Programming
USE THE COLLEGE COUNSELING SITE:
HTTPS://SITES.GOOGLE.COM/A/ISMA
NILA.ORG/ISM-COLLEGECOUNSELING
6. Ways to Support
ASK QUESTIONS THAT SHOW YOU ARE
INTERESTED IN WHAT THEY THINK
HELP THEM ORGANIZE THE INFORMATION
INITIATE OPEN, HONEST CONVERSATIONS
TEACH FINANCIAL INDEPENDENCE
VISIT COLLEGES
STAY INFORMED
7. Ask questions that show you are
interested in what they think
OPEN-ENDED QUESTIONS THAT ALLOW
SHARING OF THOUGHTS AND OPINIONS
NO RIGHT OR WRONG ANSWERS
FIND OUT WHAT THEY ARE THINKING AND
FEELING AND WHAT IS IMPORTANT TO THEM
8. Help them organize
CALENDAR FOR ALL DEADLINES IN SENIOR
YEAR
LIST OF COLLEGE CRITERIA
CHART FOR UNIVERSITIES CONSIDERING
9. List of College Criteria
MAJOR/PROGRAM
ADMISSION REQUIREMENTS
LOCATION
SIZE OF CITY
SIZE/TYPE OF CAMPUS
WEATHER/CLIMATE
RATIO OF BOYS TO GIRLS
FAMILY/FRIENDS NEARBY
AIRPORTS/ACCESSIBILITY
10. Universit
y
New York
Univ
Barnard
How
Appl
Apply
Type
Common
App
ED 1
Reg
Common
App
ED 1
Deadline Testing
Nov. 1
Jan. 1
optional
Nov. 1
required
SAT avg2060
Program/
Major
GPA/IB
Teacher
Recs
history
3.94/35
1-2, any
Urban
studies
4.08/37
2-core
Military
science
4.16/3840
None
Reg
Jan. 1
required
predicted Ibs econ 3.5/32+
Intl
UCLA
UC App
Reg
Oct.1Nov. 30
UBC
school website
Mar. 15
will read
Transc
Req
Essays?
FA Docs?
11. Open, Honest Conversations
WHAT ARE YOUR NON-NEGOTIABLES?
FINANCIAL CONSTRAINTS
CRITERIA FOR SCHOOL
BE REALISTIC
BUT….DON’T ALWAYS TALK ABOUT
COLLEGE!!
12. Open, Honest Conversations
“I WISH I HAD TALKED TO MY
SON MORE ABOUT OTHER
THINGS THIS PAST YEAR. NOW
HE IS LEAVING AND I DON’T
KNOW THE YOUNG MAN HE HAD
BECOME.”
-- A PARENT
14. College Visits
Visitors to ISM
Visiting Campuses
Visitors from around
Time to visit
the world
Lunchtime/Evening
College Fairs
Alumni Visits
College Talks
Sit in on a class
Talk with students!
Talk with professors
Eat in the dining hall
Visit residence halls
Ask Questions!
15. Prepare Yourself
BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF
STAY INFORMED AND INVOLVED
PLAN FOR YOUR CHILD’S DEPARTURE
CHANGING DYNAMICS IN SENIOR YEAR
SHIFT IN YOUR ROLE AS PARENT
16. A Few Things to Avoid
DON’T DO THE WORK FOR YOUR CHILD
DON’T CHANGE YOUR MIND AT THE LAST
MINUTE
DON’T NAG
DON’T LET YOUR WORLD REVOLVE AROUND
UNIVERSITY
DON’T COMPETE WITH YOUR FRIENDS,
PEERS, CO-WORKERS
17. Something To Think About:
Sarah McGinity’s Senior Mantra
UNIVERSITY ADMISSION ISN’T A JUDGMENT ON
MY LIFE
UNIVERSITY ADMISSION ISN’T A JUDGMENT ON
MY PARENTS OR MY UPBRINGING
THERE’S GOING TO BE SOME SORT OF
REJECTION IN ALL OF THIS
SUCCESSFUL UNIVERSITY ADMISSION IS
ABOUT ENDING UP WITH A CHOICE….AND
BEING HAPPY A YEAR FROM NOW
I HAVE ALL THE INFORMATION AND GUIDANCE
THAT’S AVAILABLE; I WILL TAKE CHARGE,
BELIEVE IN MYSELF AND TRUST THE PROCESS
Editor's Notes
Mix of practical suggestions and then just some things to think about and sort through as a parent
You are not the one DO-ing everythingFor many, this is a shift in your role and your parenting styleBut important – when child is at college you will not be right there to pick them up when they fall; but you will be available for “consulting” by phone or skypeDon’t be completely hands off and then swoop in to “fix” things
Handout with website information
Talk more about each of these
Remember – this is your child’s college search, not yoursDon’t put your own baggage on your childDon’t try to live through your childYou need to figure out what is truly important to your childOpen-ended questions that don’t offer judgmentQuestions that allow you to listen more than talkIf have time, read:**Read Global Nomad’s guide – p. 239 **Don’t Tell Me What to Do – p. 5-7 **Letting Go – p. 225What’s your favorite class? Tell me about it. Not – How was your biology test today?Tell me what you are thinking about universities? What excites you right now?Tell me where you are with your college applications. How can I support you? Not – have you finished that essay for your application yet?
Calendar – more than just college include EE deadlines, IB requirements, school events, sports, testing, vacations/tripsCollege CriteriaUniversities
Every family’s list will be different; it is unique to you and your situation
Other things to include:InterviewsSAT II Subject Tests required?One year – had student who included whether cars were allowed on campus and boy-girl ratio
Listen to what your child wants and share what you wantDon’t live through your childDon’t always talk about college – makes it too stressful your child will eventually not want to talk to you at allMaybe make a specific time/place to discuss collegeThink about having a neutral zone – dinner table? – where you don’t nag and don’t talk about college all the timeBirch - I do think we should really stress the 'Don't always talk about college' line. I have so many seniors complaining that all their parents ever talk to them about is college or schoolwork or tests.Maybe talk college one night a week – that way everyone knows when the discussion will be and students know to be prepared to share what they’ve done and what they’re thinking
From one of my parents a few years ago
$$ - allowance system; budget; debit card now?Other things you want them to know:LaundryBasic cookingSew a button on?Street smarts?
Use handout from Jen with questions to ask….and not ask!Alumni visits: great opportunity to ask what life is really likeCollege Talks: info sessions given by universities; not just information about their schools This year – talks on FA, pet peeves, essay writing, etc.
Think about what your life will be like when your child goes to college: last one to leave? First one to leave?What will you do? If you are no longer parenting 24/7, how will you fill your time in a healthy way?Preparing yourself and taking care of yourself also helps your child.
