The extra mile magazine june 2013, Leadership, HR and Personal Development

MILEthe extra
motivate inspire lead engage
P
eter and I initially
connected on twitter
and then followed up by
swapping a couple of emails on
Linkedin.
Immediately I looked at his site,
I knew it was something special.
Hoping Peter would share his
story, and of course because
inspiration is one of the key
cornerstones of the E-zine, I
had no hesitation in asking him
to be my guest interviewee for
this month’s issue of The Extra
MILE.
All the way from Austrailia, this
is what Peter told me.....
How Did
“TheXtraordinary” Come
about?
What a great question to start
with!
In November 2008 the world
woke to a new era! The good
times were bust and the Global
Financial Crisis was upon the
world.
Sleepless nights followed,
in addition to emotional
conversations with clients,
difficult decisions being made.
Time passed in addition to a
Continued on page 4
Top Profiles
on TheXtraordinary
Bethany
Hamilton -
Shark attack
survivor is
back in the
water after 3
weeks.
Spencer
West - The
first amputee
to ever reach
the peak
of Mount
Kilimanjaro
Malala
Yousafzai -
struggles to
ensure the
rights of girls
and women
in Pakistan.
Spring 2013 * Issue 2 June 2013
Peter Horsfield
By Christina Lattimer
It's my absolute pleasure to introduce peter horsfield founder
of the brilliant “thextraordinary.org”
based in sydney, austrailia, peter is scouring the
globe for inspirational people. here's why!
Be Inspired By
Extraordinary People!

Within minutes of the issue going live we began
to receive such fantastic feedback we were deeply
humbled.
The first email within minutes said “outstanding!
I loved it!” Those words exceeded any of our
expectations and made our efforts worth every
nailbiting moment! The feedback continued to
roll in over the following weekend, which I spent
replying to everyone.
Within a day from the launch, we had received
over 100 offers to contribute and 200 wonderful
people signed up to receive a regular copy during
that time.
Up to the time of writing of this column we’ve had
over 11,500 page views. Phenomenal!
We’ve had some great feedback about the quality
of the articles, and a big thanks once more goes to
Welcome to
MILEthe extra
our wonderful contributors. Complete stars!
Turning now to this month’s issue, to say we are
even more excited is an understatement. We have
some brilliant contributions and stories.
We hope our front page interview with Peter
Horsfield inspires you. How often do you search for
a new inspirational story when you are either giving
a speech or delivering a presentation? Well look no
further than Peter’s great site TheXtradordinary.org
We love the brilliant book review by Bernie Nagle
giving his insights on Cindy Wigglesworth’s great
book:
SQ 21 – The Twenty-One Skills of Spiritual
Intelligence
- A must read for the enlightened leader.
We have teamed up with Peter Newton of Free
Management Books to give you access to a great
resource of free books. They are expertly written
and great quality. See the feature on page 22.
We also have a great offer for new subscribers:
Sign up to receive a regular copy of the monthly
Ezine and receive a link to our great new E-book
The Best Business Advice I Ever Received
It is a collaborative venture with 38 inspiratonal
members of the Inspirational Leadership Linkedin
group. It is fun, bright and inspirational. Thanks to
all who took part in this great initiative!
The list goes on and on, and I hope you enjoy
our many articles and stories, details of which are
opposite.
Thank you for reading this, and for your support
and enthusiasm, it is amazing. You are Amazing!
Christina Lattimer Hannah McIntosh
W
elcome to the
2nd Issue of
The Extra MILE
E-Zine. What a month it
has been! We have been
absolutely overwhelmed by
the brilliant response to the
first issue of the E-zine.

In This Issue
ARTICLES
OTHER CONTENTS
Be Inspired By Extraordinary People! fRONT pAGE
Interview with Peter Horsfield
Nine Attitudes of Emotionally Intelligent Leaders and Managers 12
Christina Lattimer
SNAKES ON A PLANe 15
David Jones
Leadership Inspires Thought Leaders 18
Dawn A Harden
The Democratic Dictator 20
Robert Whetsell
PUBLIC SPEAKINg Fear is Nothing 24
Jon Torrens
This Is The Way We Do Things Around Here! 26
richie maddock
NEWSFLASH! 30
Suzanne Mandy
DOES SOCIAL MEDIA ROCK YOUR HR WORLD? 34
Nicola Bidgood
Thank You Tom! 7
twitter top 4 8
Book Review 10
Get the Blog 17
FREE MAnAGEMENT BOOKS 22
a shot of inspiratioN 28
Must Watch Video’s 31
JOIN OUR LINKEDIN GROUP! 38
CONTRIBUTORS 39
Contact Us 42

Continued from front cover
few birthdays; clients began
again to be happier, their
investments began to recover…
and the clearing air gave time to
pause to reflect and experience
a deeply profound moment.
Success is not about how much
money you can accumulate;
success is about how much
value others receive from you.
From that moment on I set my
daily to-do-list to discover and
deliver a better experience for
all I interacted with.
This included researching other
successful people, defining for
myself what I truly valued in
life and implementing these
discoveries in alignment with my
core values.
From then www.thextraordinary.
org was founded. With the
intention to share FREE
INSPIRATIONAL PROFILES
of eXtraordinary people all
over the globe; so to inspire,
motivate and educate others
who desire also to be successful
and contribute to making the
world a better place as their
life’s legacy.
Who inspired you?
Every day I am inspired
by ordinary people who do
extraordinary things!
That said, the defining moment
to commit to our eXtraordinary
crusade was cemented after
chancing upon a video about an
eXtraordinary man named Nick
Vujicic.
Could you imagine life with no
arms or legs? Well Nick Vujicic is
that guy! He’s the
first eXtraordinary person I
profiled and well.. check him
out yourself and you will see
why me telling his eXtraordinary
life story is no justice to this
eXtraordinary, deeply spiritual,
tragic, inspirational, with a down
to earth Aussie sense of humor,
human being.
Nick if you ever read this
thank you..I dedicate www.
thextraordinary.org to you and
God bless you.
What is your most
inspirational story?
Any story that involves one
overcoming adversities,
challenges and struggles
in one’s life is inspirational;
however what makes the people
I write about eXtraordinary
is when doing what they are
doing has the goal/intention to
help improve the lives of others
that’s eXtraordinary!
Somaly Mam, was sold into
sex slavery at the age of six
years old, she escaped the
brothel at 20 years old and
over the next 15 years has
established a foundation to
rescue children in south east
from brothels, to date she has
saved over 10,000 girls.
Malala Yousafzai stood up
for girls education in Pakistan,
she was shot in the head by the
Taliban returning home from
school on a school bus. Malala
survived and recovered now
even more determined to stand
up against oppression, tell her
story, and girls education in
Pakistanis destined to succeed
through her tragedy, efforts and
making global awareness. d.
Everyday I’m amazed by the
eXtraordinary contributions,
success and achievements
people are experiencing in
harmony with their focus
and intention to improve the
lives of others! It’s Simply
eXtraordinary!
What did you hope to
achieve by launching
TheXtraordinary?
I attended an event in 2011
where Bear Grylls described
eXtraordinary. Bear if ever has
the opportunity to read this
article our crusade’s name
was founded after you gave
your inspirational speech when
visiting Australia.
Thank you.
“ Success is
not about
how much
money
you can
accumulate;
success is
about how
much value
others receive
from you.”
Nelson Mandela

The goal and intention of www.
thextraordinary.org is to provide
people with that little bit extra
inspiration, empowerment and
motivation to keep moving
forward and achieve one’s goals
in life important to ourselves.
I passionately believe that when
one person achieves their own
goals their achievement then
sows the seed of inspiration
of others who also want to
achieve their own goals. I
also believe that we are more
inspired by real life stories of
living eXtraordinary people,
being inspired by what people
alive today are achieving and
the ways they are giving back to
make the world a better place
for all mankind.
Who will the site benefit?
Centers of influence in the
professional services of social/
community service, educators,
personal development or
any profession that requires
leadership, motivation, and
inspiration etc.. all the way
through to a resource for
parents.
100% of our information is
free, child safe and can be used
as a great tool to reinforce
a positive, aspirational and
engaging message about how
real living people in the world
today are making a positive
contribution to society across
all professions (art, business,
sport, philanthropy..etc), be
them men, woman, physically
challenged, children, teenagers,
growing up in western society
or a developing country.
How can people use the
site?
Our promise to visitors is to
share our research of one
eXtraordinary person a day i.e.
7 days a week, so visiting www.
thextraordinary.org viewers
have the opportunity to be
inspired every single day on
their journey to themselves
being eXtraordinary.
Other tools available are a
Free 10 lesson teachers plan
designed for teachers and
students to research, discuss,
homework and assignments.
This is a excellent teachers
resource, from testimonials we
have received.
EXtarordinary people we
have researched are using
our resource as a way to gain
greater exposure for their cause
and share with their fans/
followers.
On our facebook page
https://www.facebook.com/
XtraordinaryChannel we have a
daily trivia and the opportunity
to share and suggest stories of
inspirational and eXtraordinary
people.
What services or
products do you offer/
intend to offer?
Soon to be released is a Free
mobile game app called Trivia
extraordinaire!
We are also soon to release
certificate templates for our
members to enter the name
of the person they think is
eXtraordinary and the reason
why, so they can print it out and
present it to the extraordinary
person as acknowledgement of
achievement/ gift.
Another feature we will be
adding soon is a online template
enabling members to create
their own extraordinaire
biography of themselves,
or someone they think is
eXtraordinary including, why
they are eXtraordinary, quotes,
pictures, contact details,
biography etc. and have this
featured on our site and share
with others.
Briliant Peter Thank You! Here at
the Extra MILE we think you are
eXtraordinary!
“The difference
between ordinary
and extra-ordinary
is so often just simply
that little word -
extra. And for me, I
had always grown
up with the belief
that if someone
succeeds it is
because they are
brilliant or talented or
just better than me…
and the more of
these words I heard
the smaller I always
felt! But the truth is
often very different…
and for me to learn
that ordinary me can
achieve something
extra-ordinary by
giving that little
bit extra, when
everyone else gives
up, meant the world
to me and I really
clung to it…”
Bear Grylls”
Bear Grylls

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Thank You Tom!
Tom Lowery sprung
into my social media life
about one month ago.
Since that time he’s had
a significant and positive
impact by enlarging my
network.
Tom is what I call a
connector, a connector with
a difference. He consistently
and frequently introduces
people to each other, with
humour and flair.
His philosophy seems simple,
yet takes a lot of effort. He
helps people to widen their
net, get their message out
and shares their work and
information.
In many respects, Tom and
I have a lot in common. We
both believe there is lots
of great talent out there,
and we also share a desire
to help others develop a
platform for like-minded
people to shine.
Tom has a pretty cool blog
which has a pot pourri of
articles and musings which
he peppers with writings
from people who inspire him.
If you want to be
entertained, then you need
to go and see!
You can find Tom’s blog here:
THINKING OUT LOUD
I wanted to say a big and
public Thank You to Tom
for including me on his blog
article:
22 Most Innovative
Entrepreneur Blogs You Need
To Follow
I was honoured to appear in
this article along with some
truly inspirational people.
I’m including the blog with
links to those people, so you
can go check them out. And
of course as a big Thank You
to Tom!
by Christina Lattimer

twitter top 4
MILEthe extra
motivate inspire lead engage
We LOVE sharing great content on Twitter!
Here is a summary of the most popular content we
shared on Twitter last month. Simply click on the
images to access the original articles.
6 Reasons Leaders Make Bad
Decisions - Glenn Llopis
The Problem With Squeezing
Employees Too Hard - Jessica
Stillman
What If Today…You Told
Someone That They’re
Amazing? - Betsy Cross
They Will Change Your Life:
The 7 Non-Negotiables Of
Winning - David K Williams

This Month’s Infographic is courtesy of www.dailyinfographic. com

I
became acquainted with
Cindy through a mutual
friend in the Integral
community. Cindy was
gracious enough to join
our Cleveland gathering
via Skype one Wednesday
evening two years ago, and
she imparted such a lovely
warmth and authenticity, I
knew I had to get to know
her better. Well, two years
later she has gifted us with
this book and we are greatly
enriched for the experience.
So, what is Spiritual
Intelligence (SQ) anyway,
and why should we care
about it in the context of
leadership?
Cindy defines SQ as
“the ability to behave
from wisdom and
compassion while
maintaining inner and outer
peace regardless of the
situation”. Borrowing heavily
(and openly) from the
Goleman/Boyatzis model of
Emotional Intelligence,
Cindy defines
SQ as “the
ability to
behave from
wisdom and
compassion
while
maintaining
inner and
outer peace”
Book Review
SQ 21– The Twenty-One Skills of Spiritual Intelligence
Author: Cindy Wigglesworth Reviewed by Bernie Nagle

Cindy has crafted an easy
to follow guidebook, deftly
describing the 21 specific
Skills of Spiritual Intelligence
comprising four Quadrants of
development:
• Self-Awareness
• Universal Awareness
• Self Mastery
• Social Mastery/Spiritual
Presence.
She intertwines the 21
Skill-Set descriptions with
delightful stories and
pertinent research, in a tone
that reminds you of a long
and loving conversation with
one of your best friends.
Cindy doesn’t “teach” she
reveals a path for you to
find your own way at your
own pace. And to make it
even more believable she
intersperses the conversation
with snippets from her own
spiritual journey which I
found endearing.
The path of development
leads one from an ego-
centric pattern of behavior
(motivated by fear, anger,
and self-righteousness)
to an ability to effortlessly
engage one’s “Higher Self”,
making compassionate and
wise decisions, becoming
a calming and healing
presence, and an effective
leader/change agent.
After painstakingly describing
and contextualizing
the 21 Skills and their
attendant effects, Cindy
then devotes the next 60
pages to providing “how to”
information on developing
Spiritual Intelligence via a
nine-step process and three
core exercises anyone (even
I) can follow.
If one believes, as I do, that
Enlightened Leadership is
about engaging others in
purposeful endeavours larger
than ourselves, it follows
that such leaders ought
to possess the skills and
qualities Cindy delineates for
us so eloquently and lovingly.
This body of leadership
wisdom, were it a parcel of
prime real estate, would
be found in the same
neighborhood (likely the
same street) as Covey,
Bennis, Greenleaf, Boyatzis,
Barrett, and Collins. Yes, it is
THAT important!
In Cindy’s parlance, “Deep
Leadership” is a key human
quality each one of us should
aspire to develop. “Deep,
authentic leadership means
that we lead ourselves first”,
she says.
How can we possibly lead
ourselves if we have not
first worked tirelessly on
self-awareness and self-
development of the sort we
find in this groundbreaking
thought-piece?
In chapter one, Cindy shares
a quote that sets the tone for
the rest of the book: “Love
is a bird with two wings.
One wing is compassion;
the other is wisdom. If
either wing is broken, the
bird cannot fly.” This loving
conversation with your most
trusted friend is brimming
with both.
“How can we possibly lead ourselves if we have
not first worked tirelessly on self-awareness and
self-development”

L
ike learning to drive,
leading and managing
people is an experiential
journey.
My entrance onto the
leadership stage was when I
was promoted into the role,
having stood in for the team
leader from time to time
I don’t know about you, but
although I had practiced at
managing people I hadn’t
experienced it properly until I
had to do it for real.
Junior leaders and managers
are appointed because
they have shown potential,
displayed leadership skills
or are extremely good in
the specific field they are
in. More senior leaders and
managers can have had a
most distinguished career as
a professional, i.e. doctor or
lawyer or accountant, and
the next step for their career
is to manage people with the
same specialism.
An entrepreneurial business
owner may be extremely
successful and have acquired
commercial business acumen
and savvy long before they
actually have to employ
people.
So people enter leadership
and management at all
stages. Often their success
as a leader or not; will
be determined by their
people skills, and if these
skills haven’t had a chance
to develop then the most
successful entrepreneur or
professional may well find the
going very tough indeed.
One of the most impactful
people skills is emotional
intelligence. Wikipedia
describes emotional
intelligence as” the ability to
identify, assess, and control
the emotions of oneself, of
others, and of groups”.
If you’ve ever been in an
office where you have
seen people have
tantrums of a two year old,
or the rumour mill is the
most reliable communication
channel, or there is a
prevalent blame culture, then
you know that emotional
intelligence is somehow
lacking.
Even worse, if conflict is
commonplace, and your
people aren’t firing on all
cylinders or even are openly
disengaged then you may
have a problem which stems
from limited or unrecognised
poor emotional intelligence.
Depending on our
psychological profile, and we
are all thankfully different;
then you may have brilliant
emotional intelligence, or
conversely you may need to
develop this skill more. The
great thing about emotional
intelligence is that if you are
struggling, you can learn!
My first challenge as a young
By Christina Lattimer
Nine Attitudes of
Emotionally Intelligent
Leaders and Managers

manager was learning how
to control my own emotions.
In the early years I was quite
often daunted about having
to deal with some larger
than life characters I had to
manage.
Managing my fear was one
of my first and probably my
longest lessons. I still feel
afraid sometimes, but now I
know how to deal with it, and
it doesn’t faze me.
My second challenge was
to learn how to manage the
emotions of my team. This
stage was a long one and a
steep learning curve. The
journey was interesting,
thought provoking and a
necessary one.
The final stage in my learning
came when I had to think
about engaging large teams.
Some of who I didn’t see for
months at a time. Although
I did try to do the best
I could to have physical
contact as much as I could
humanly manage.
Trying to encourage people to
feel good, fulfil their potential
and understand how much I
appreciated them was more
difficult.
Although there are many
skills attached to managing
remotely, my own emotional
intelligence was a key
player in making remote
management a success.
I have worked for and
supported many managers
and managed teams locally,
regionally and nationally.
During this time I have
practiced and observed
attitudes and behaviours
which have been the most
successful in getting the best
out of a team.
These attitudes and
behaviours are most
commonly adopted by
people who have honed their
emotional intelligence skills
and have the best people
skills as a result.
I have practiced these in the
latter years, and wished I had
access to and learned them in
the early years.
You might be thinking that it
all sounds unrealistic, given
some of the people you might
be managing.
But I can guarantee that if
you think about it enough,
they are all attitudes or
stances you would like people
to take with you.
The Nine Attitudes are:
1. Accepting people completely for who
they are
2. Always looking for the good in people,
there is always some
3. Dealing with negatives in an impersonal
but practical way and getting over it!
4. Not judging – we all make mistakes.
5. Giving people the benefit of the doubt
6. Listening to what people need and
wherever possible – obliging
7. Responding neutrally to anger or other
attacking behaviour and helping the
person to reframe it in a positive way
8. Pivoting negative situations to achieve
a positive outcome
9. Caring about people, even when they
were difficult

SNAKES ON A PLANE
by David Jones
“What’s wrong with them? They’re just staring at me.”
S
ome years ago I was
asked to put together
a training programme
for a young company that,
after a strong beginning, had
begun to stagnate. The service
was innovative and close to
recession-proof. Recruitment
procedures were solid and new
staff were hungry and sharp.
The problem?
The MD was a hands-on leader
who wrote and delivered all
internal training. His intelligence
and passion had lifted the
business off the ground but
his communication skills were
pulling it back down again.
When I sat in on a team
meeting the issues became
clear. He prepared with a
“warm-up”, stretching his calves
and hamstrings in the manner
of a middle distance runner,
then outlined the company’s
goals for the coming month in
a series of sporting metaphors
that no one could understand.
The staff, who liked him and
wanted to do well for him, tried
hard to pay attention. It was
an uphill struggle. When one
team member plucked up the
courage to ask for clarification
of what he meant by “passing
the commercial baton” he
repeated the phrase, slowly
and loudly, with accompanying
“sign language”’. Frustration and
disenchantment swept through
the room like a virus.
Staff turnover had increased,
and one exit interview had
revealed a pointed and painful
truth.
A key reason for leaving was
that the boss was very bad at
telling people what he wanted,
but very good at telling them
when they hadn’t delivered it.
The solution?
Snakes on a Plane.
For those of you who haven’t
had the pleasure, “Snakes on a
Plane” is a film about, well…a
plane with a lot of snakes on it.
I’ve seen it once. Didn’t love
it, didn’t hate it. The one thing
I can say for certain is that I
wasn’t misled by it. No one
who saw it has any right to ask
for their money back. The title
raised an expectation and the
movie met it.
I asked my client to list the
training and appraisal sessions
he had planned for the coming
month. I then asked him to
break each one down to its
essentials. What exactly did
he expect of his staff? If he
was pitching this session as a
Hollywood movie, what would
the title be?
Jargon and management speak
were ruthlessly dispatched,
and a clear central idea was
established that people could
understand and buy into. In
our repeated practice sessions,
I kept a flashcard to hand.
Whenever my client drifted
into convoluted language, the
bad habits that were losing
his audience and damaging
his business, I held it up. Four
words. “SNAKES ON A PLANE”.
One of the greatest pleasures
in the workplace is seeing the
look on a person’s face when
they are reminded of their own
capability and potential.
Strip away the management
speak and let people see what
they can actually do.
My client had an employee in
her mid-40s who had returned
to work following a lengthy
career break to raise a family.
Her performance and motivation
levels had been below par in a
role that required organisational
skill and clear thinking under
pressure, qualities she had been
specifically hired for.
We held an appraisal that
began as one of the sadder
professional experiences of my
life and ended as one of the
most satisfying. Since the day
she’d joined the company, a
torrent of empty words had left

this person unclear about any
of her daily goals. The jargon
she’d been fed about juggling
day to day responsibilities had
confused and upset her to the
point where she believed she
lacked the ability to multitask.
The remedy was simple. I
asked her to tell me about a
day looking after three young
“A key reason
for leaving
was that the
boss was very
bad at telling
people what
he wanted,
but very good
at telling them
when they
hadn’t delivered
it.”
Snakes On A Plane (2006)
children. Without a hint of self-
importance she gave a list of
tasks and responsibilities that
would have put her employer
and me in a spin.
Multitasking? Here was the
expert. All we needed to do now
was explain very clearly what
was expected of her every day.
Entries in a diary. Projects to a
deadline. Snakes on a plane.
People want to be inspired, to
be elevated. But above all they
want a clear understanding of
what’s expected of them.
What does “winning” look
like? If you don’t know what
constitutes a job well done,
how can you take proper pride
in your performance? And if it’s
not clear which direction the
boss wants to lead you, How
can you follow?
I’m going to watch a DVD now.
It’s called “We Bought a Zoo”.
Guess what it’s about?

“Surprising, inventive, The Downside of Up, the story
of a wide-eyed innocent thrust into the world of high-
stakes business had me laughing out loud.”
Marie Myung-Ok Lee, Someone’s Daughter,
Necessary Roughness
Coming Soon from NetMinds

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THE LATEST BLOG POSTS FROM CHRISTINA AT PEOPLE DISCOVERY

I
n life and business,
leadership plays a major
role. It sets a pattern for
our day-to-day activities and
measures our success or caustic
failure.
The profile of a leader need not
be prolific every time but the
skill it yields must prove viable,
engaging and real.
A leader is a fundamentalist
of change and is not afraid to
stand alone if need be.
Understanding how to
orchestrate and maintain
objectives and stay on task.
Before you can become a leader
you must understand and build
a foundation of leadership
standards.
Is your goal C-Level
management? Will you inspire
others to want to think for
themselves and follow your
direction?
In order to become a thought-
leader you must learn what it
means to be one.
Leader vs. Manager
Learn the difference. Many who
can manage daily tasks assume
they are ready to lead. Good
management reveals a person’s
ability to stay on topic, reliable
in a pinch.
In juxtaposition, a leader by
definition has major managerial
skills but the key element here:
you have to have the ability to
lead people. The tone of this
role is not simply to command.
The savvy to guide, teach,
instruct and correct when
needed. Cohesively doing so
recommends a balance of skills.
Another element left to fend for
itself: Inspiration. Leaders must
aspire to inspire. So what you
say carries concise structure
without micromanagement.
“In order to
become
a thought-
leader you
must learn
what it means
to be one.”
Leadership Inspires
Thought Leaders
By Dawn A. Harden

There is a nominal difference
between being in control
and under control. Wanton
obedience means listen and
obey. Strong leadership means
what you have taught sees
fruition.
Build Trust
Those around you have great
expectations. Everyone listening
to you may not become your
best friend but they want, no
need, someone they trust.
When working with others
honestly, the support sharpens.
People gain confidence in you,
respecting your opinion.
Realistic guidelines will
help reduce any trepidation
associated with your role as
leader. Take advantage of
teaching tools your company
offers. Seek external support
for your business model.
Share and solicit ideas
thereby allowing for flexibility
on execution of tasks. This
critical step opens the door to
improved dialogue, creating a
positive, shared environment.
While many industries
have forsaken honesty as
rudimentary, don’t believe
the hype. Peer engagement
involves your accountability
in truthfully assessing and
maintaining the needs and
safety of those working with
you. Put your money where
your mouth is by keeping it
real.
Learn To Listen
Since Texting’s emergence,
we tend to express ourselves
in abbreviated terms. Within
seconds we have responses
before complete, proper
conveyance is diagnosed. Have
an actual person-to-person
meeting and just listen. Our
conjecture should be well
thought out. Not based on
reactive assumptions. Much
is miscommunicated by these
methods, albeit convenient.
Be aware that certain subject
matter requires face time.
Being a good listener means
you choose your statements
wisely as they are based facts
as presented. This insures and
protects time lost on recovery.
Key point: You can either be a
good hearer or a good listener.
One hears voices the other
hears words.
Understand Your Role
The role of a thought-leader is
to evoke innovations. If you are
seeking such a role be ready to
accept the responsibility that
accompanies it. The basics of
the daily or weekly plan are a
given.
Thought-leaders though, need
to be more than perfunctory.
They should have the energy
and forthrightness to be the
creator.
Write out a mantra you believe
in and live by on a daily basis
because it will make it easier to
remember and follow through
on. Post it so others see it as
this will give basis for assurance
that you mean what you
say. Reinforce it with actions
that speak for themselves.
Hypocritical movement or
speech jeopardizes good
efforts.
Have A Vision
Famous Fashion designer Ralph
Lauren was quoted as saying,
“A leader has the vision and
conviction that a dream can be
achieved. He inspires the power
and energy to get it done.”
While this point has been
touched on, the relevance of
repetition is clearly valuable.
We have it in our power to
achieve greatness. There is no
need to ride the coattails of
others because we stand on
perfectly solid ground all on our
own.
Success does not come from
how many projects see the light
but from the path chosen to
birth the idea in the first place.
Own the challenges, highs
and lows. Boundaries for your
greatness can only be held back
because you gave up or gave
in. Worrying and stewing over
what others’ perceptions of you
are will not help thought-life
capabilities.
We all make millions of
decisions. Each of us
earns kudos for our role in
keeping the ebb and flow of our
ever changing society. So call it
what you want but at the end
of the day you are a leader.
“A leader has
the vision and
conviction
that a dream
can be
achieved. He
inspires the
power and
energy to get
it done.”

I
t doesn’t take a lot
of research today
to understand that
most of the legitamate
writing regarding
modern day leadership
philosophy centers
around engagement and
service. A tremendous
amount of effort is put
into promoting a kinder,
gentler leadership
culture.
Being a spiritual person,
I am all in with this.
I’m a big believer in the
clichè “You will draw
more flies with honey
than vinegar.”
Great leadership,
however, is made up of
two parts. Engagement
and service are the key
components of that
part of leadership that
inspires those you lead
to come along for the
ride, to work together to
accomplish things they
might not otherwise
consider possible.
However, not a lot is
being written about the
The
Democratic
Dictator
The Path to Great
Leadership
By Robert Whetsell

other equally important
piece great leaders
so brilliantly exhibit...
dictatorial decisiveness.
A nicer description would
be unilateral decision
making.
Let us not forget that
great leadership often
has little to do with
democracy. Sometimes
the great leader has to
make decisions for you,
or the group.
While great leadership is
made up of two equally
important parts, one
definitely comes before
the other.
It takes times to earn
the trust of your team,
whether or not you
are their leader at that
moment.
Engagement and service
are essential in earning
the right to be, as
President George W Bush
so famously quipped,
“the decider.”
Great leaders have a
sense of the moment,
and recognize when it is
necessary to engage and
serve vs giving direction.
But they have earned
that right over time by
gaining the trust of those
around them.
Try to skip over that step
and it won’t matter if
your decisions are right
or wrong. And don’t
think for a second that
you only have to earn
that trust once. You have
to continuously engage
and serve in order to
maintain the team’s faith
in you.
As you rise in the ranks
of management and
leadership, you will
have to earn that trust
anew as you ascend to
positions on new teams.
For those of you who
successfully become
“deciders,” be ready
to welcome the
responsibility. Lots of
folks seek the glory and
the power, but want
nothing to do with the
responsibility required of
great leaders. It’s really
easy to see this in action
if you watch any amount
of political coverage.
If we are going to be
great leaders, we have
to understand that
sometimes, as much
as we enjoy inspiring
and serving our teams,
we are going to have
to make uncomfortable
choices, decisions that
the team is not capable
of making on their
own, and carry the
responsibility.
Engaging and serving is
all about democracy.
Directing and deciding
is all about being
dictatorial.
Trust is the bridge
between the two.
Heed the call to great
leadership. Embrace
your inner “Democratic
Dictator.”
“It takes
time to earn
the trust of
your team,
whether or
not you are
their leader
at that
moment.”

Leadership and Learning
Leading others by the way you approach and solve issues shows everyone
the extent of your personal integrity and forms the basis of your reputation.
Integrity is more than just saying the ‘right things at the right time’; it is about
demonstrating your values and beliefs through your everyday actions.
This type of manager inspires those around them to want to emulate these values
and achieve more. The words of John Quincy Adams are as applicable today as
they were in the nineteenth century, if not more so because of the speed of
change and abundance of information.
If your actions inspire others to dream more,
learn more, do more and become more, you are
a leader. John Quincy Adams, America’s sixth president.
But how can you achieve this with so much of your time under the constant
pressure of having to get the ‘job’ done? You have to be more creative in how you
use what little time you do have by seeking out new ways to gain the knowledge
and skills you need to perform your role and show others how they can develop
themselves.
Free Management eBooks can help you and your team to gain a practical business
skill in just 20 minutes. Topics include: leadership, finance, productivity, project
management and business strategy. Our free eBooks, checklists and templates
are available for PC, Mac, Tablet, Kindle and Smartphone. Visit www.free-
management-ebooks.com

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StrategieS
tacticS • toolS
StrategieS
tacticS • toolS
for increasing
business profitability
for increasing
business profitability

PUBLIC
SPEAKING
Fear is Nothing
Stand-up comedians are speakers with
wit, adaptability and tons of confidence.
They’re fearless, right?
Wrong. In my experience as a stand-up comic,
all comedians experience some kind of fear
before going on-stage, and while the ones at
the very top may have slightly less than most,
they’ve also become very good at hiding it.
When they step out and grab the microphone,
that’s the crucial moment where they can instil
a sense of faith in the audience by showing
everyone that they know what they’re doing,
even though the crowd may have never seen or
heard of them before.
Winston Churchill said: “Courage is what it takes
to stand up and speak; courage is also what it
takes to sit down and listen”.
Winston Churchill also said: “Attitude is a little
thing that makes a big difference”.
For me as a speaker and coach, that means the
way that you speak and present yourself.
I see too many people who simply lack any
conviction or sense of fun when they speak.
Your audience wants to see something new,
and to make a connection with you. Step out with
a big smile, and deliver your information and your
message in the way that you would want to hear it.
Try to have some fun.
Fear is your natural
reaction to an unusual
situation. It’s like
someone standing
in your way, trying
to make you mess
up. Just give it some
attitude; push past and
take your rightful place
in front of everyone;
it’s your turn, and those
people watching are all
on your side.
Your fear of standing
up in front of a group
of people to speak is
not only completely
normal, but is actually a
good thing; it provides
the energy you’re going
to use to get the job
done.
By Jon Torrens

This Is The Way We Do
Things Around Here!
By Richie Maddock
M
ost organisations ‘say’
things very well. They
‘say’ what the company
values are; they ‘say’ what their
customer service standards are;
they ‘say’ what their policies and
procedures are.
What is said and what is done
however, might be somewhat
out of sync – and that creates
the reality for employees -
which in turn becomes your
corporate culture.
Yet there is an interesting
paradox when it comes to
workplace culture.
Many leaders realise the
importance of culture, and how
it impacts on everything so they
‘say’ all the right things, yet few
understand culture in simple
and practical terms – and what
we don’t understand, we cannot
manage and what we don’t
manage we become victims of.
Recently, we conducted
research that acquired views
from over 350 people. We asked
the following question:
“If the culture of your
organisation was to become
as good as it realistically
could, how much improvement
would there be on peoples
performance/productivity”
89% of senior leaders reported
that their peoples’ performance
would improve by 20% or more
if their culture was realistically
improved and almost seven out
of ten non-managers (69%) felt
that performance would improve
by 50% or more.
“There is
a huge
untapped
potential lying
dormant in
organisations.”
This shows that there is a
huge untapped potential lying
dormant in organisations.
If leaders could tap into their
workplace culture and actively
work on improving it – who
knows what performance gains
could be made?
This is where the concept of
UGRs© plays a big part.
UGRs stands for ‘unwritten
ground rules’. The best
definition of UGRs is that they
are people’s perceptions of ‘this
is the way we do things
around here’
Sample UGRs in a company
include:
• At our meetings it isn’t
worth complaining because
nothing will get done
• The only time anybody gets
spoken to by the boss is
when something is wrong
• The company talks about
good customer service, but
we know they don’t really
mean it, so we don’t really
have to worry about it
• We go through the motions
with our bosses, once they
have gone we do what we
want
UGRs drive people’s behaviour,
yet they are seldom talked
about openly.
People check out the prevailing
UGRs in their workplace so
that they can conform which in
turn influences their behaviour.
They will watch a number of
cues to deduce the UGRs in an
organisation. These include:
• People watch what gets
noticed for example, if
someone gets into trouble
for speaking up, then the
UGR might be ‘Around here
you’re better off not to
speak up even when you are
asked

• People watch what
doesn’t get noticed for
example, if someone speaks
badly of a boss, and nobody
suggests they shouldn’t talk
that way, then a UGR might
be ‘Around here its fine to
criticise the boss’
• People watch for the
difference between what
people say and what
they do for example, if
a manager says ‘in this
organisation we care for
our people’, and soon after
that same person is heard
treating a person without
respect, then the UGR might
be ‘Around here, the bosses
say one thing and means
another ’
We have learnt though that you
can change UGRs and that you
can use the concept to improve
culture by engaging with all
your staff in ‘this is the way we
do things around here’.
We have developed a five-step
approach, which has been
deployed in organisations across
the world:
• Envisage – this involves
identifying the kind of
culture that is necessary for
the organisation to succeed
into the future. We help
organisations in this phase
to identify the Key Cultural
Attributes (KCAs) necessary
for their future success
• Assess – Identify the
prevailing UGRs in the
organisation linked to the
KCAs identified in the first
step. This involves doing
what we call a UGRs Stock
Take – where we uncover
the real UGRs in the
organisation. The step also
involves identifying areas
of concern from the Stock
Take and putting in place
strategies to address those
concerns
• Teach – Teaching everyone
in the organisation about
the UGRs concept. We’ve
learned that many people
subscribe to less-than-
positive UGRs but do so
unconsciously. Learning
about UGRs is often a
revelation for people that
results in big changes in
behaviour.
• Involve – Get people
identifying and prioritising
the positive UGRs by
which they would like
to characterise the
organisation into the future
• Embed – Put in place
strategies to embed the
positive UGRs identified in
the previous phase.
For too long, the culture of
organisations has been left
to chance and that is mainly
because leaders find it one of
those subjects that is wrapped
in theory and academia.
UGRs is a practical and simple
way to engage the whole
organisation in something that
is the lynchpin to success.
During tough times, there are
huge benefits to be gained by
identifying the kind of culture
necessary for the organisations
future successes, and re-
shaping the UGRs accordingly.
Your
Culture
Your
People
Your
customers’
experience
Your vision,
strategies
and
leadership
Your way
of working
Your
values

a shot of
inspiration
We love this video by Tony Robbins. This guru
never ceases to inspire. In this video Tony
advocates using INCANTATIONS instead of
AFFIRMATIONS, and in his well known unique
way explains emphatically why.
If you’re having a doubtful moment or unsure
if what you are doing is the right thing, then
Tony’s video is a must!” You can access the
video HERE or click on the image.
Opposite we’ve included some timeless
wisdom from the inspirational Mahatma
Gandhi. We found these 10 quotes on the
Skillcode Wordpress Blog. Visit the Skillcode
Blog if you’d like to find out more.

1. Be the change that you wish to see in the world.
2. Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.
3. An eye for an eye will only make the whole world blind.
4. Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.
5. When I despair, I remember that all through history the way of truth and love have always
won. There have been tyrants and murderers, and for a time, they can seem invincible, but in the
end, they always fall.
6. Where there is love there is life.
7. Freedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes.
8. Nobody can hurt me without my permission.
9. I will not let anyone walk through my mind with their dirty feet.
10. A man is but the product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes.

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NEWSFLASH!
Developing others will develop your
leadership!
W
ho develops whom?
When I took on people
development as part of
my retail position a few years
ago, I really wanted to make a
difference.
As a former classroom teacher,
my job was to inspire and teach.
I wanted to do the same in my
new role.
Although retail was new for me,
I was confident I had the right
tools to develop my new team.
What I didn’t anticipate was
how my team would provide the
inspiration for my own personal
development. This fascinating
journey opened my eyes to the
relationship between leadership
and personal development.
The Big Three key tools for
everyday use
Leadership is different
depending upon how you look
at it. In other words, one’s
perspective is one’s reality.
I’ve found that most people
equate accomplishing their
goals with a great sense of
satisfaction.
Goal setting, feedback and
coaching can easily elevate
personal development and team
accomplishments.
1. Goal Setting
When an individual sets both
short and long-term goals, they
are only partially on the path to
accomplishing them.
In the workplace, and life, goal
setting is a fundamental aspect
of personal development and
successful leadership. I’ve found
there are a few essential keys
to successfully realizing goals,
which are often left out of the
goal-setting process.
Revisit each one and ask the
following questions:
Where am I in accomplishing
my goal?
What steps can I take toward
achieving this goal?
Remember that goals are
personal. No judging,
comparison or belittling allowed.
Rethink each goal and ask:
Do I really want this?
Should I revise it?
Go ahead and rewrite the goal
so it is achievable, making sure
you are challenged and remain
inspired. Consider whether the
goal is too easy. If we reach our
goals more than 50% of the
time, perhaps the bar isn’t set
high enough.
Revitalize your approach by
enrolling others.
Who will support me in reaching
my goal?
Who will hold me accountable?
These questions will elevate
your success rate by moving you
into possibility; creating integrity
and ultimately achieving your
dreams. They are also crucial to
successful engagement between
team members and leadership.
2. Feedback
Providing a culture that
promotes giving/receiving
feedback, regardless of position,
sets the stage for growth
and development. Ideally,
receiving feedback should
originate during initial training,
and continue throughout an
individual’s career. Experiencing
feedback, (whether you are
doing a great job or have room
“Remember
that goals
are personal.
No judging,
comparison
or belittling
allowed.”
by Suzanne Mandy

for improvement), translates
into meaningful and productive
discussion.
Effective feedback is
• Timely and in the moment
• Honest and delivered with
empathy and compassion
• Looks at the what or how
something occurred (not
why)
• Focuses on actions or
behaviors, never a person
• Sharing of information and
observations
Feedback is critical in addressing
performance and behavior
issues and must occur between
all employees, no matter the
position.
It effectively promotes desired
results, productivity and self-
esteem of the team because
everyone knows where they
stand.
3. Coaching
Distinguishing between coaching
and training is important in the
development of team members.
Simply put, training is where the
expert instructs those with less
knowledge or experience in that
field.
It is directive, which means
the trainer directs and instructs
the trainees in what and how
to learn, ultimately enhancing
performance.
Coaching, on the other hand
requires facilitation to enhance
performance, learning and
development. This creates an
awareness of knowledge and
expertise in the person being
coached.
While training is directive,
coaching is non-directive. The
coach never tells, trains or
instructs. Instead, coaching
stimulates people to figure
things out themselves, using
expertise and resources already
present within them. How cool
is that?
Some of my favorite coaching
questions that facilitate big time
development are:
What is going on for you right
now?
What’s stopping you?
What are the facts?
What is your next step?
When will you do this?
What support or resources do
you need?
How will you access these?
What did you learn that you
could apply now?
How can I support you?
What if there were no limits?
I can recall the exact day when
a colleague asked, “What do
you actually DO?” I was floored.
Clearly there was a gap in
the way I communicated with
my team. This inspired me
to engage more often, and
transformed my leadership.
What is the limit?
It’s no secret that a team that
grows and learns together can
produce incredible results.
When an entire team engages
in dialogue surrounding goals,
feedback and in the moment
coaching, the team also
develops their leaders.
This made me consider the
possibility that leadership and
personal development contain
countless facets, many which
are undiscovered.
In the words of T.S. Eliot:
“Only those that risk going
too far can possibly find out
how far one can go.”

S
usan Heathfield of
about.com thinks so. In
her article 10 Reasons
Social Media Should Rock
Your World she outlines 10
ways HR can benefit from
social media, in summary:
1. Stay in touch with
colleagues and friends.
2. Help colleagues find you.
3. Find candidates for jobs.
4. Find a new job.
5. Establish your online
brand.
6. Join groups that share
your interests, your
community, or your
profession
7. Develop social
connections over time on
social media sites.
8. Provide a space in which
the users of your product
or service can interact
with you.
9. Build community around
your product or service.
10. Establish a Company
presence
Nicola Bidgood, HR Business
Manager, one of our
Inspirational Leadership and
Engagement Group members
is a postive and enthusiastic
presence on our social media
network, and is active on
many social media platforms.
We asked Nicola to tell
us how social media has
benefitted her.
Nicola reported:
“I formed the Westcountry
HR Network Group in May
2012 in Exeter, UK, where
I am based. I felt that
HR Networking in the
Westcountry wasn’t very
proactive and I resolved to
do something about it.
I decided to create a LinkedIn
Group, Twitter account,
Facebook page and website
for HR professionals with the
main focus on bringing HR
together.
During the last year over
250 people have joined the
Group.
The Group was designed to
meet the needs of the HR
Profession in the Devon,
Cornwall and Somerset
area and to deliver local HR
professionals the best service
in HR Networking in the
Westcountry.
The Group not only blogs
regularly on LinkedIn,
Facebook and Twitter but
meets on a regular basis in
Exeter where events are held
at Stephens Scown Solicitors.
The topics are decided by the
members every month.
Through building this
Network, the group now has
members in HR, Training,
Coaching, Law, Recruitment,
Occupational Health, and
much much more who then
DOES SOCIAL MEDIA ROCK
YOUR HR WORLD?
By Nicola Bidgood

offer their time for free to
present at the networking
events.
The activity on social media
sites and networking has
been key for my own HR
development as attending
these events and networking
with others has not only
increased my confidence,
but has helped me and other
members keep up to date
with the current changes in
employment law, learn new
skills, discuss different areas
of HR, meet new people,
create business opportunities
for people and generally
make new friends.
One of my best moments
was when I made contact
with Morag Barrett of Skye
Associates based Colorado in
the USA.
We first met on twitter,
and exchanged some
tweets. So when I sent
out an exploratory request
on Linkedin for a coach or
mentor to help me develop
my career, having already
made contact, Morag came
forward.
After 10 months of Skypeing
each other, Morag came over
to the UK and ran an event
at the Westcountry Network
Group, which was a great
success.
Having used social media
extensively, I have made
some great and valuable
contacts, which have
benefitted not only me,
but also other members of
the group, who have now
started working together on
many, many other projects
together which I am very
proud of.
I’ve recently been been asked
to run network events at a
local college in South Devon,
so using social media has
helped me grow my network
in extraordinary ways.”
We think Nicola is doing
an amazing job and is a
living demonstration of how
social media can benefit HR
professionals.
Not only has engaging on
social media benefitted
Nicola, but also her ever
growing, switched on HR
Network Group.
Good Job Nicola!

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CONTRIBUTORS
JON TORRENS
Jon Torrens coaches companies and individuals in all aspects of
speaking and presenting, from the fundamentals of writing through
to advanced improvisation techniques. He’s a former professional
stand-up comic and computer game designer, and is based in Ely.
Comedians Confidence Blog
DAWN A. HARDEN
Dawn is Founder and CEO of Floral Greens Publishing. Her love
of writing has led her to be an accomplished Amazon author and
Speaker. Her fondness for Deaf culture and all things natural inspires
her to educate and encourage everyone she meets to think outside
the box and pay it forward.
Floral Green Publishing LLC
RICHIE MADDOCK
RichieisafounderandDirectorofLynchpinAssociatesLtd,aUKbased
companythatseekstohelporganisationsimprovethecustomerexperience
andenhanceemployeeengagementthroughdevelopmentofitsculture.Heis
acontributingauthoronthebook‘TheExecutiveDiet’andisasoughtafter
speakerandpresenteronworkplaceculture.LynchpinaretheUK’slicensed
consultantsoftheUGRs©concept.
LynchpinandAssociates
ROBERT WHETSELL
Born and raised in Oklahoma, Robert Whetsell has over 25 years of
experience as an educator, coach, and manager. He currently works
as the Director of Operations for Crown Products
(www.crownproducts.com), a regional distributor based in the NYC
metro area. You can find Robert online at LinkedIn, Twitter, and his
personal blog
Crown Products

SUZANNE MANDY
Suzanne has been a professional educator, coordinator and facilitator
for the past two decades. Her extensive experience in promoting
learning and leadership through motivational teamwork has resulted
in innovative and successful projects throughout the public and
private sectors. A graduate from the University of Maine, Suzanne
holds a Bachelor of Science in Education degree, as well as a Masters
of Education in Exercise Science.
LULU Lemon
DAVID JONES
Having managed sales, training and recruitment operations
throughout Europe and the Gulf, David currently works in
translation and localisation, helping clients build bridges to
emerging markets and truly “go global”. An experienced copywriter
and journalist, he writes regularly on business, management,
culture and current affairs issues. David believes passionately in the
power of motivational coaching and has written and delivered a
range of courses under the collective title “If You Believe It, They’ll
Believe It”.
David Jones LinkedIn
BERNIE NAGLE
Author of the 1997 book, “Leveraging People Profit - The Hard
Work of Soft Management”, with Foreword by Warren Bennis. This
book originates and describes the concept of the “Altrupreneur”
- one who conducts the affairs of an enterprise with conspicuous
regard for others. This Leadership model is servant-leadership based,
relationship-driven, goal-guided, and laser-focused on engaging
innovation and creativity to create sustainable competitive advantage
in the workplace.
Altrupreneur

NICOLA BIDGOOD
I am a confident, self motivated and decisive Human Resources
professional with a proven track record of establishing and building
long term business relationships at all levels. High level experience
in dealing with grievance and disciplinaries. Implementing
communications and engagement strategies. Conduct regular focus
groups to measure engagement. Good influencing, coaching and
negotiating skills. Tactfully able to deal with difficult and sensitive
situations.
WestCountry HR
TOM LOWERY
Writer, Corporate Training specialist, author and entrepreneur.
Blogger at Thinking Out Loud. I write about life, people, business
and interpersonal relationships, which means, in essence, I’ve
combined literature and business to create my own career path: I’m
a “lit-re-preneur
Thinking Out Loud
PETER HORSFIELD
Founder at www.theXtraordinary.org. Our crusade is about
inspiring you and motivating you to achieve your goals and the
things that are important to you.. We do this by researching and
writing about extraordinary people that have overcome struggles
and gained prominence and success and at the same time are
contributing back to the world to make it a better place.
theXtraordinary.org

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