SlideShare a Scribd company logo
Management Lessons - 1
Sure,
why not
Can I also sit
like you and
do nothing
all day long?
To be sitting and doing nothing,
you must be sitting very, very high up...
Management Lessons - 2
I would love
to be able to
get to the top
of that tree.
But I haven’t
got the energy
Well, why don’t you
nibble on some
of my droppings.
They are packed
with nutrients.
The turkey pecked
at a lump of dung
and found that it
actually gave him
enough strength to
reach the first
branch of the tree.
The next day, after
eating some more dung,
he reached the second
branch. Finally after a
fortnight, there he was
proudly perched at the
top of the tree. Soon he
was promptly spotted
by a farmer, who shot
the turkey out of the
tree!
Bullshit might get you to the top,
but it won’t keep you there...
Management Lessons - 3
When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be BOSS. The brain
said, “I should be BOSS because I control the whole body’s responses and
functions”. The feet said, “We should be the BOSS as we carry the brain about
and get him to where he wants to go”. The hand said, “We should be the BOSS
because we do all the work and earn all the money”. And so it went on and on
with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until finally the asshole spoke up. All the
parts laughed at the idea of the asshole being the BOSS. So the asshole went
on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work. Within a short time the eyes
became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet witched, the heart and the lungs
began to panic and the brain fevered. Eventually, they all decided that the
asshole should be the BOSS, so the motion was passed. All the other parts
did all the work while the BOSS just sat and passed out the shit!
You don’t need brains to be a BOSS-
any asshole will do...
Management Lessons - 4
1. Not everyone who drops shit on you is your enemy
A little bird was flying
south for the winter.
While it was lying there, a cow came by
and dropped some dung on it. As the
frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung,
it began to realize how warm it was. The dung
was actually thawing him out. He lay there all
warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy
A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.
Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the
pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him!
2. Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend
3. And when you are in deep shit, keep your mouth shut!

More Related Content

What's hot

A PROJECT WORK BASED ON MANAGEMENT PRINCIPLES CLASS - 12
A PROJECT WORK BASED ON MANAGEMENT PRINCIPLES CLASS - 12A PROJECT WORK BASED ON MANAGEMENT PRINCIPLES CLASS - 12
A PROJECT WORK BASED ON MANAGEMENT PRINCIPLES CLASS - 12
Rishabh Shah
 
Women Entrepreneurs
Women EntrepreneursWomen Entrepreneurs
Women Entrepreneurs
Pallavi Matte
 
5 Steps To A Smart Compensation Plan
5 Steps To A Smart Compensation Plan5 Steps To A Smart Compensation Plan
5 Steps To A Smart Compensation Plan
BambooHR
 
Shiv nadar -A successfull entrepreneur
Shiv nadar -A successfull entrepreneurShiv nadar -A successfull entrepreneur
Shiv nadar -A successfull entrepreneur
Pulkit Mahajan
 
BUSINESS STUDIES PROJECT ON PRINCIPLES OF MANAGEMENT
BUSINESS STUDIES PROJECT ON PRINCIPLES OF MANAGEMENTBUSINESS STUDIES PROJECT ON PRINCIPLES OF MANAGEMENT
BUSINESS STUDIES PROJECT ON PRINCIPLES OF MANAGEMENT
CHARAK RAY
 
Women entrepreneurship
Women entrepreneurshipWomen entrepreneurship
Women entrepreneurship
Sudhansu Sethi
 
Business Studies (Marketing Management) Project Class 12th CBSE
Business Studies (Marketing Management) Project Class 12th CBSE      Business Studies (Marketing Management) Project Class 12th CBSE
Business Studies (Marketing Management) Project Class 12th CBSE
Dheeraj Kumar
 
diamond personality
diamond personalitydiamond personality
diamond personality
Zenobia Sukhia
 
henry fayol's 14principels of management with respect to (McDonald's) company...
henry fayol's 14principels of management with respect to (McDonald's) company...henry fayol's 14principels of management with respect to (McDonald's) company...
henry fayol's 14principels of management with respect to (McDonald's) company...
maliumesh840
 
fayol principles of management in reliance fresh
fayol  principles of management in reliance freshfayol  principles of management in reliance fresh
fayol principles of management in reliance fresh
funwithsiddh
 
Business Studies (Principles of Management) Project Class 12th CBSE
Business Studies (Principles of Management) Project Class 12th CBSE Business Studies (Principles of Management) Project Class 12th CBSE
Business Studies (Principles of Management) Project Class 12th CBSE
Dheeraj Kumar
 
Indigo
Indigo Indigo
Indigo
Jude Joseph
 
Riddles and Puzzles
Riddles and Puzzles Riddles and Puzzles
Riddles and Puzzles
Ana Almarza
 
Our iceberg is melting.ppt
Our iceberg is melting.pptOur iceberg is melting.ppt
Our iceberg is melting.ppt
Madhu Karunakaran
 
Development and Engagement in the Age of Social Media
Development and Engagement in the Age of Social Media Development and Engagement in the Age of Social Media
Development and Engagement in the Age of Social Media
Paul Brown
 
Solved Cbse Class 12 Accountancy Full Project(Comprehensive Project, Ratio An...
Solved Cbse Class 12 Accountancy Full Project(Comprehensive Project, Ratio An...Solved Cbse Class 12 Accountancy Full Project(Comprehensive Project, Ratio An...
Solved Cbse Class 12 Accountancy Full Project(Comprehensive Project, Ratio An...
Dan John
 
ORGANISATIONAL BEHAVIOR IN MOVIE SULTAN
ORGANISATIONAL BEHAVIOR IN MOVIE SULTANORGANISATIONAL BEHAVIOR IN MOVIE SULTAN
ORGANISATIONAL BEHAVIOR IN MOVIE SULTAN
Kartik Verma
 
Principle of Managment CBSE Class 12th
Principle of Managment CBSE Class 12thPrinciple of Managment CBSE Class 12th
Principle of Managment CBSE Class 12th
Yash Aditya
 
Solved Comprehensive Project Cbse Class 12 Accountancy Project
Solved Comprehensive Project Cbse Class 12 Accountancy ProjectSolved Comprehensive Project Cbse Class 12 Accountancy Project
Solved Comprehensive Project Cbse Class 12 Accountancy Project
Dan John
 
XII Marketing Project Work
XII Marketing Project WorkXII Marketing Project Work
XII Marketing Project Work
Rahil Jain
 

What's hot (20)

A PROJECT WORK BASED ON MANAGEMENT PRINCIPLES CLASS - 12
A PROJECT WORK BASED ON MANAGEMENT PRINCIPLES CLASS - 12A PROJECT WORK BASED ON MANAGEMENT PRINCIPLES CLASS - 12
A PROJECT WORK BASED ON MANAGEMENT PRINCIPLES CLASS - 12
 
Women Entrepreneurs
Women EntrepreneursWomen Entrepreneurs
Women Entrepreneurs
 
5 Steps To A Smart Compensation Plan
5 Steps To A Smart Compensation Plan5 Steps To A Smart Compensation Plan
5 Steps To A Smart Compensation Plan
 
Shiv nadar -A successfull entrepreneur
Shiv nadar -A successfull entrepreneurShiv nadar -A successfull entrepreneur
Shiv nadar -A successfull entrepreneur
 
BUSINESS STUDIES PROJECT ON PRINCIPLES OF MANAGEMENT
BUSINESS STUDIES PROJECT ON PRINCIPLES OF MANAGEMENTBUSINESS STUDIES PROJECT ON PRINCIPLES OF MANAGEMENT
BUSINESS STUDIES PROJECT ON PRINCIPLES OF MANAGEMENT
 
Women entrepreneurship
Women entrepreneurshipWomen entrepreneurship
Women entrepreneurship
 
Business Studies (Marketing Management) Project Class 12th CBSE
Business Studies (Marketing Management) Project Class 12th CBSE      Business Studies (Marketing Management) Project Class 12th CBSE
Business Studies (Marketing Management) Project Class 12th CBSE
 
diamond personality
diamond personalitydiamond personality
diamond personality
 
henry fayol's 14principels of management with respect to (McDonald's) company...
henry fayol's 14principels of management with respect to (McDonald's) company...henry fayol's 14principels of management with respect to (McDonald's) company...
henry fayol's 14principels of management with respect to (McDonald's) company...
 
fayol principles of management in reliance fresh
fayol  principles of management in reliance freshfayol  principles of management in reliance fresh
fayol principles of management in reliance fresh
 
Business Studies (Principles of Management) Project Class 12th CBSE
Business Studies (Principles of Management) Project Class 12th CBSE Business Studies (Principles of Management) Project Class 12th CBSE
Business Studies (Principles of Management) Project Class 12th CBSE
 
Indigo
Indigo Indigo
Indigo
 
Riddles and Puzzles
Riddles and Puzzles Riddles and Puzzles
Riddles and Puzzles
 
Our iceberg is melting.ppt
Our iceberg is melting.pptOur iceberg is melting.ppt
Our iceberg is melting.ppt
 
Development and Engagement in the Age of Social Media
Development and Engagement in the Age of Social Media Development and Engagement in the Age of Social Media
Development and Engagement in the Age of Social Media
 
Solved Cbse Class 12 Accountancy Full Project(Comprehensive Project, Ratio An...
Solved Cbse Class 12 Accountancy Full Project(Comprehensive Project, Ratio An...Solved Cbse Class 12 Accountancy Full Project(Comprehensive Project, Ratio An...
Solved Cbse Class 12 Accountancy Full Project(Comprehensive Project, Ratio An...
 
ORGANISATIONAL BEHAVIOR IN MOVIE SULTAN
ORGANISATIONAL BEHAVIOR IN MOVIE SULTANORGANISATIONAL BEHAVIOR IN MOVIE SULTAN
ORGANISATIONAL BEHAVIOR IN MOVIE SULTAN
 
Principle of Managment CBSE Class 12th
Principle of Managment CBSE Class 12thPrinciple of Managment CBSE Class 12th
Principle of Managment CBSE Class 12th
 
Solved Comprehensive Project Cbse Class 12 Accountancy Project
Solved Comprehensive Project Cbse Class 12 Accountancy ProjectSolved Comprehensive Project Cbse Class 12 Accountancy Project
Solved Comprehensive Project Cbse Class 12 Accountancy Project
 
XII Marketing Project Work
XII Marketing Project WorkXII Marketing Project Work
XII Marketing Project Work
 

Similar to Management lesson

Managment
ManagmentManagment
IIM_A_Managment
IIM_A_ManagmentIIM_A_Managment
Management Lessons
Management LessonsManagement Lessons
Management Lessons
buseco
 
Corporate Lesson
Corporate LessonCorporate Lesson
Corporate Lesson
Azizi Ahmad
 
Managment
ManagmentManagment
Managment
He Yan
 
Managment
ManagmentManagment
Managment
yogeshwarsarup
 
Iim A Managment
Iim A ManagmentIim A Managment
Iim A Managment
51 lecture
 
IIM management concept interesting
IIM management concept  interestingIIM management concept  interesting
IIM management concept interesting
Imprint Training Center
 
Boss
BossBoss
Iim A Managment
Iim A ManagmentIim A Managment
Iim A Managment
21arpit
 
management lesson
management lessonmanagement lesson
management lesson
Vasantkumar Parakhiya
 
IIM A Managment
IIM A ManagmentIIM A Managment
IIM A Managment
Bhawana Sahu
 
Funny Managment Lessons.........
Funny Managment Lessons.........Funny Managment Lessons.........
Funny Managment Lessons.........
amarwfs
 
Managmen[1]
Managmen[1]Managmen[1]
Managmen[1]
Rajesh Vr
 
Management Lessons
Management LessonsManagement Lessons
Management Lessons
Venkatram T Subrahmanyam
 
Corporate lessons
Corporate lessonsCorporate lessons
Corporate lessons
Anupriya Garg
 
Corporate lessons
Corporate lessonsCorporate lessons
Corporate lessons
Laxma Reddy
 
CORPORATE LES.ppt
CORPORATE LES.pptCORPORATE LES.ppt
CORPORATE LES.ppt
Kameswara Rao Poranki
 
Corporate Lessons
Corporate LessonsCorporate Lessons
Corporate Lessons
Aneel Mitra
 
Corporate lessons
Corporate lessonsCorporate lessons
Corporate lessons
Nitesh Daga
 

Similar to Management lesson (20)

Managment
ManagmentManagment
Managment
 
IIM_A_Managment
IIM_A_ManagmentIIM_A_Managment
IIM_A_Managment
 
Management Lessons
Management LessonsManagement Lessons
Management Lessons
 
Corporate Lesson
Corporate LessonCorporate Lesson
Corporate Lesson
 
Managment
ManagmentManagment
Managment
 
Managment
ManagmentManagment
Managment
 
Iim A Managment
Iim A ManagmentIim A Managment
Iim A Managment
 
IIM management concept interesting
IIM management concept  interestingIIM management concept  interesting
IIM management concept interesting
 
Boss
BossBoss
Boss
 
Iim A Managment
Iim A ManagmentIim A Managment
Iim A Managment
 
management lesson
management lessonmanagement lesson
management lesson
 
IIM A Managment
IIM A ManagmentIIM A Managment
IIM A Managment
 
Funny Managment Lessons.........
Funny Managment Lessons.........Funny Managment Lessons.........
Funny Managment Lessons.........
 
Managmen[1]
Managmen[1]Managmen[1]
Managmen[1]
 
Management Lessons
Management LessonsManagement Lessons
Management Lessons
 
Corporate lessons
Corporate lessonsCorporate lessons
Corporate lessons
 
Corporate lessons
Corporate lessonsCorporate lessons
Corporate lessons
 
CORPORATE LES.ppt
CORPORATE LES.pptCORPORATE LES.ppt
CORPORATE LES.ppt
 
Corporate Lessons
Corporate LessonsCorporate Lessons
Corporate Lessons
 
Corporate lessons
Corporate lessonsCorporate lessons
Corporate lessons
 

Recently uploaded

HOW TO START UP A COMPANY A STEP-BY-STEP GUIDE.pdf
HOW TO START UP A COMPANY A STEP-BY-STEP GUIDE.pdfHOW TO START UP A COMPANY A STEP-BY-STEP GUIDE.pdf
HOW TO START UP A COMPANY A STEP-BY-STEP GUIDE.pdf
46adnanshahzad
 
2024-6-01-IMPACTSilver-Corp-Presentation.pdf
2024-6-01-IMPACTSilver-Corp-Presentation.pdf2024-6-01-IMPACTSilver-Corp-Presentation.pdf
2024-6-01-IMPACTSilver-Corp-Presentation.pdf
hartfordclub1
 
Easily Verify Compliance and Security with Binance KYC
Easily Verify Compliance and Security with Binance KYCEasily Verify Compliance and Security with Binance KYC
Easily Verify Compliance and Security with Binance KYC
Any kyc Account
 
Structural Design Process: Step-by-Step Guide for Buildings
Structural Design Process: Step-by-Step Guide for BuildingsStructural Design Process: Step-by-Step Guide for Buildings
Structural Design Process: Step-by-Step Guide for Buildings
Chandresh Chudasama
 
Lundin Gold Corporate Presentation - June 2024
Lundin Gold Corporate Presentation - June 2024Lundin Gold Corporate Presentation - June 2024
Lundin Gold Corporate Presentation - June 2024
Adnet Communications
 
Income Tax exemption for Start up : Section 80 IAC
Income Tax  exemption for Start up : Section 80 IACIncome Tax  exemption for Start up : Section 80 IAC
Income Tax exemption for Start up : Section 80 IAC
CA Dr. Prithvi Ranjan Parhi
 
Creative Web Design Company in Singapore
Creative Web Design Company in SingaporeCreative Web Design Company in Singapore
Creative Web Design Company in Singapore
techboxsqauremedia
 
Digital Marketing with a Focus on Sustainability
Digital Marketing with a Focus on SustainabilityDigital Marketing with a Focus on Sustainability
Digital Marketing with a Focus on Sustainability
sssourabhsharma
 
Part 2 Deep Dive: Navigating the 2024 Slowdown
Part 2 Deep Dive: Navigating the 2024 SlowdownPart 2 Deep Dive: Navigating the 2024 Slowdown
Part 2 Deep Dive: Navigating the 2024 Slowdown
jeffkluth1
 
Unveiling the Dynamic Personalities, Key Dates, and Horoscope Insights: Gemin...
Unveiling the Dynamic Personalities, Key Dates, and Horoscope Insights: Gemin...Unveiling the Dynamic Personalities, Key Dates, and Horoscope Insights: Gemin...
Unveiling the Dynamic Personalities, Key Dates, and Horoscope Insights: Gemin...
my Pandit
 
Best practices for project execution and delivery
Best practices for project execution and deliveryBest practices for project execution and delivery
Best practices for project execution and delivery
CLIVE MINCHIN
 
Zodiac Signs and Food Preferences_ What Your Sign Says About Your Taste
Zodiac Signs and Food Preferences_ What Your Sign Says About Your TasteZodiac Signs and Food Preferences_ What Your Sign Says About Your Taste
Zodiac Signs and Food Preferences_ What Your Sign Says About Your Taste
my Pandit
 
BeMetals Investor Presentation_June 1, 2024.pdf
BeMetals Investor Presentation_June 1, 2024.pdfBeMetals Investor Presentation_June 1, 2024.pdf
BeMetals Investor Presentation_June 1, 2024.pdf
DerekIwanaka1
 
Event Report - SAP Sapphire 2024 Orlando - lots of innovation and old challenges
Event Report - SAP Sapphire 2024 Orlando - lots of innovation and old challengesEvent Report - SAP Sapphire 2024 Orlando - lots of innovation and old challenges
Event Report - SAP Sapphire 2024 Orlando - lots of innovation and old challenges
Holger Mueller
 
-- June 2024 is National Volunteer Month --
-- June 2024 is National Volunteer Month ---- June 2024 is National Volunteer Month --
-- June 2024 is National Volunteer Month --
NZSG
 
Anny Serafina Love - Letter of Recommendation by Kellen Harkins, MS.
Anny Serafina Love - Letter of Recommendation by Kellen Harkins, MS.Anny Serafina Love - Letter of Recommendation by Kellen Harkins, MS.
Anny Serafina Love - Letter of Recommendation by Kellen Harkins, MS.
AnnySerafinaLove
 
Authentically Social by Corey Perlman - EO Puerto Rico
Authentically Social by Corey Perlman - EO Puerto RicoAuthentically Social by Corey Perlman - EO Puerto Rico
Authentically Social by Corey Perlman - EO Puerto Rico
Corey Perlman, Social Media Speaker and Consultant
 
amptalk_RecruitingDeck_english_2024.06.05
amptalk_RecruitingDeck_english_2024.06.05amptalk_RecruitingDeck_english_2024.06.05
amptalk_RecruitingDeck_english_2024.06.05
marketing317746
 
Hamster Kombat' Telegram Game Surpasses 100 Million Players—Token Release Sch...
Hamster Kombat' Telegram Game Surpasses 100 Million Players—Token Release Sch...Hamster Kombat' Telegram Game Surpasses 100 Million Players—Token Release Sch...
Hamster Kombat' Telegram Game Surpasses 100 Million Players—Token Release Sch...
SOFTTECHHUB
 
2022 Vintage Roman Numerals Men Rings
2022 Vintage Roman  Numerals  Men  Rings2022 Vintage Roman  Numerals  Men  Rings
2022 Vintage Roman Numerals Men Rings
aragme
 

Recently uploaded (20)

HOW TO START UP A COMPANY A STEP-BY-STEP GUIDE.pdf
HOW TO START UP A COMPANY A STEP-BY-STEP GUIDE.pdfHOW TO START UP A COMPANY A STEP-BY-STEP GUIDE.pdf
HOW TO START UP A COMPANY A STEP-BY-STEP GUIDE.pdf
 
2024-6-01-IMPACTSilver-Corp-Presentation.pdf
2024-6-01-IMPACTSilver-Corp-Presentation.pdf2024-6-01-IMPACTSilver-Corp-Presentation.pdf
2024-6-01-IMPACTSilver-Corp-Presentation.pdf
 
Easily Verify Compliance and Security with Binance KYC
Easily Verify Compliance and Security with Binance KYCEasily Verify Compliance and Security with Binance KYC
Easily Verify Compliance and Security with Binance KYC
 
Structural Design Process: Step-by-Step Guide for Buildings
Structural Design Process: Step-by-Step Guide for BuildingsStructural Design Process: Step-by-Step Guide for Buildings
Structural Design Process: Step-by-Step Guide for Buildings
 
Lundin Gold Corporate Presentation - June 2024
Lundin Gold Corporate Presentation - June 2024Lundin Gold Corporate Presentation - June 2024
Lundin Gold Corporate Presentation - June 2024
 
Income Tax exemption for Start up : Section 80 IAC
Income Tax  exemption for Start up : Section 80 IACIncome Tax  exemption for Start up : Section 80 IAC
Income Tax exemption for Start up : Section 80 IAC
 
Creative Web Design Company in Singapore
Creative Web Design Company in SingaporeCreative Web Design Company in Singapore
Creative Web Design Company in Singapore
 
Digital Marketing with a Focus on Sustainability
Digital Marketing with a Focus on SustainabilityDigital Marketing with a Focus on Sustainability
Digital Marketing with a Focus on Sustainability
 
Part 2 Deep Dive: Navigating the 2024 Slowdown
Part 2 Deep Dive: Navigating the 2024 SlowdownPart 2 Deep Dive: Navigating the 2024 Slowdown
Part 2 Deep Dive: Navigating the 2024 Slowdown
 
Unveiling the Dynamic Personalities, Key Dates, and Horoscope Insights: Gemin...
Unveiling the Dynamic Personalities, Key Dates, and Horoscope Insights: Gemin...Unveiling the Dynamic Personalities, Key Dates, and Horoscope Insights: Gemin...
Unveiling the Dynamic Personalities, Key Dates, and Horoscope Insights: Gemin...
 
Best practices for project execution and delivery
Best practices for project execution and deliveryBest practices for project execution and delivery
Best practices for project execution and delivery
 
Zodiac Signs and Food Preferences_ What Your Sign Says About Your Taste
Zodiac Signs and Food Preferences_ What Your Sign Says About Your TasteZodiac Signs and Food Preferences_ What Your Sign Says About Your Taste
Zodiac Signs and Food Preferences_ What Your Sign Says About Your Taste
 
BeMetals Investor Presentation_June 1, 2024.pdf
BeMetals Investor Presentation_June 1, 2024.pdfBeMetals Investor Presentation_June 1, 2024.pdf
BeMetals Investor Presentation_June 1, 2024.pdf
 
Event Report - SAP Sapphire 2024 Orlando - lots of innovation and old challenges
Event Report - SAP Sapphire 2024 Orlando - lots of innovation and old challengesEvent Report - SAP Sapphire 2024 Orlando - lots of innovation and old challenges
Event Report - SAP Sapphire 2024 Orlando - lots of innovation and old challenges
 
-- June 2024 is National Volunteer Month --
-- June 2024 is National Volunteer Month ---- June 2024 is National Volunteer Month --
-- June 2024 is National Volunteer Month --
 
Anny Serafina Love - Letter of Recommendation by Kellen Harkins, MS.
Anny Serafina Love - Letter of Recommendation by Kellen Harkins, MS.Anny Serafina Love - Letter of Recommendation by Kellen Harkins, MS.
Anny Serafina Love - Letter of Recommendation by Kellen Harkins, MS.
 
Authentically Social by Corey Perlman - EO Puerto Rico
Authentically Social by Corey Perlman - EO Puerto RicoAuthentically Social by Corey Perlman - EO Puerto Rico
Authentically Social by Corey Perlman - EO Puerto Rico
 
amptalk_RecruitingDeck_english_2024.06.05
amptalk_RecruitingDeck_english_2024.06.05amptalk_RecruitingDeck_english_2024.06.05
amptalk_RecruitingDeck_english_2024.06.05
 
Hamster Kombat' Telegram Game Surpasses 100 Million Players—Token Release Sch...
Hamster Kombat' Telegram Game Surpasses 100 Million Players—Token Release Sch...Hamster Kombat' Telegram Game Surpasses 100 Million Players—Token Release Sch...
Hamster Kombat' Telegram Game Surpasses 100 Million Players—Token Release Sch...
 
2022 Vintage Roman Numerals Men Rings
2022 Vintage Roman  Numerals  Men  Rings2022 Vintage Roman  Numerals  Men  Rings
2022 Vintage Roman Numerals Men Rings
 

Management lesson

  • 1. Management Lessons - 1 Sure, why not Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long? To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up...
  • 2. Management Lessons - 2 I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree. But I haven’t got the energy Well, why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings. They are packed with nutrients. The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fortnight, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree! Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won’t keep you there...
  • 3. Management Lessons - 3 When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be BOSS. The brain said, “I should be BOSS because I control the whole body’s responses and functions”. The feet said, “We should be the BOSS as we carry the brain about and get him to where he wants to go”. The hand said, “We should be the BOSS because we do all the work and earn all the money”. And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until finally the asshole spoke up. All the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole being the BOSS. So the asshole went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work. Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet witched, the heart and the lungs began to panic and the brain fevered. Eventually, they all decided that the asshole should be the BOSS, so the motion was passed. All the other parts did all the work while the BOSS just sat and passed out the shit! You don’t need brains to be a BOSS- any asshole will do...
  • 4. Management Lessons - 4 1. Not everyone who drops shit on you is your enemy A little bird was flying south for the winter. While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him out. He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him! 2. Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend 3. And when you are in deep shit, keep your mouth shut!