Psychological evolution of the self- from birth to adulthood.

1. HEART CENTERED MENTORING
AN INTEGRATED MODEL OF CHANGING AND
MAINTAINING A BALANCED
RELATIONSHIP
WITH ALL OF LIFE
“The cry for help!”
Based on the work of
Hans Mathiesen &
Dr. Louise Mathiesen
© Heart-Centered mentoring 2018

2. Human Beings are "sparks of the Creator," and this
pure source of love within each of us is centered in
the heart, and is activated by the Soul and Spirit.
Unfortunately, the thought process of the conditioned
brain, and the overlay of mis-information passed
from generation to generation and the cultural
milieu, have re-enforced and distorted our views of
reality, and especially of ourselves. This
presentation describes the way this has occurred,
and what we can do about it.

3. These Reality Change programs, which are the
culmination of over 30 years of experience, research,
and studies on the relationship between connection
and separation, have lead to a Heart-Centered Process
designed to change and illuminate the client’s
understanding and view of self and of others. This
unified whole-person process of education and self –
exploration, completes the development and
maturation in each individual which has been delayed
by incomplete and/or negligent connection with
caregivers during birth and early childhood.

4. The support of educated, experienced mentors,
and the person’s own directed efforts in this
complete, scientifically designed exploration and
process of change, releases tensions, stress caused
illness, opens and broadens perceptual contexts,
and allows, for the first time, the person’s freedom
of action to see, and be, who they truly are. This
is simply a self-learning process which brings you
into balance, integrating with life and
enthusiastically sharing your unique intelligence
and creativity.

5. Our mission is prevention by releasing a person’s
blockages to natural maturation and development.
Our breakthrough discovery of a paradox of false
beliefs between the conscious brain mind (cortex)
and the subconscious emotional brain (amygdala)
has led to a new effective whole-person change
process of connection versus separation which
creates deep self-knowledge and self-awareness
leading to self-efficacy—knowing you can make a
difference and doing it. This process releases
negative conditioning and the blockages to new
levels of Soul-Heart spiritual awakening.

6. • THE FOLLOWING SYMBOLIC REPRESENTATION IS
A SYNOPSIS OF THE PROGRESSION OF LIFE IN
THE ILLUSION OF CONDITIONED ASSUMPTIONS,
CONCLUSIONS, OPINIONS AND BELIEFS (ACOBs).
• THE CHILD BRAIN LEARNS BY COPYING.
• THIS INFORMATION WILL PROVIDE YOU WITH
THE CONTEXT OF YOUR FALSE IDENTITY-- A
MISPERCEPTION THAT MAKES LIFE A DIFFICULT
MOVEMENT OF CONSTANT SEARCH, ALWAYS IN
THE SHADOW OF PAIN, SUFFERING & SORROW.

7. • WE BELIEVE WE MUST FIGHT FOR EXISTENCE,
AS IF SWIMMING IN A RIVER AGAINST THE
CURRENT.
• WE WISH TO SHOW YOU THIS RESISTANCE IS
THE RESULT OF A MAJOR MISUNDERSTANDING,
BEGINNING AT BIRTH.
• KNOWING THIS CAN PROVIDE THE IMPETUS FOR
NEW CHOICES SHOULD YOU WISH TO DO SO.

8. HEART-CENTERED MENTORING
IS A PROCESS OF CHANGE
TRACING THE PATH FROM CONNECTION (ONENESS)
THROUGH THE LAYERS OF SELF INDUCED
SEPARATION, THAT IS, FROM
• INNOCENCE, TO
• THE UKNOWN, TO
• MISUNDERSTANDING
AND SEARCHING, TO
• DON'T KNOW HOW, TO
• KNOWING, TO
• BEING

9. WE WILL TRACE THE BLOCKAGES TO THE HEART
THROUGH CONSCIOUSNESS DEVELOPMENT IN THE
HUMAN BEING AS FOLLOWS:
• FETUS: SYNERGY HEART IN PEACE
• NEWBORN INFANT: SYNERGY HEART IN REACTION
• PARADOXICAL EXISTENCE: SYNERGY HEART IN
SEPARATION
• MATURE ADULT: SYNERGY HEART IN BALANCE
• ONENESS: SYNERGY HEART IN ACTION-IN-
RELATIONSHIP WITH ALL OF LIFE

10. FETUS – SYNERGY HEART IN PEACE
ONENESS – KINDRED WITH MOM WOMB CONNECTION
AWARENESS
“Sensitivity”
BODY MOTION ALIVENESS
COMFORT
PURPOSEFUL MOTION
“I am having fun doing this with Mom”
BALANCE CERTAINTY
SOUL INNOCENCE LOVE
CO-OPERATION
CONNECTION & CARING
“I am now curious to seek how I
can make a difference” Fractal code. We
search to recreate
a self-similar
image of
closeness, food,
touch, heartbeat,
voices, attached,
dependent, peace
while waiting,
unaware. Mom in
control.

11. NEWBORN INFANT – SYNERGY HEART IN REACTION - ONENESS CONNECTION IS LOST TO
AWARENESS. SEPARATION BEGINS WITH BIRTH TRAUMA & LEAVING WOMB
AWARENESS
“Sensitivity”
PHYSICAL BODY
FEAR OF BEING COMPLETE
(BEING ALONE/BORN)
NOT ATTACHED/ LOSS OF TOUCH/ COLD/ HUNGRY
CHANGE
UNKNOWN
PAIN
NOT ENOUGH TO KEEP

12. NEWBORN INFANT – CONTINUED
BIRTH TRAUMA – NEWBORN INFANT – CRIES OUT FOR HELP
(PAIN/FEAR/COLD) RUSH TO RELIEVE CHILD’S DISCOMFORT
BECOMES THE PROCESS OF IMPRINTING SEPARATION
MESSAGE:
MISUNDERSTANDING (LIE)
“IF I CRY OUT (GET ATTENTION – BE BAD*) I WILL BE TAKEN
CARE OF, GET RELIEF OF DISCOMFORT.” (*ADULTS ARE
OBVIOUSLY NOT HAPPY WITH ME, SO I’M BAD.) NOW HAS BECOME A
SUBCONSCIOUS MEMORY, CAUSING PARADOXICAL
ACTIVITIES: ATTENTION SEEKING BEHAVIORS. THAT IS, I
MUST BE SEPARATED/BAD TO GET RECONNECTED. TO STAY
ALIVE I MUST BE NOTICED.

13. PARADOXICAL EXISTENCE - SYNERGY HEART IN SEPARATION - ATTENTION-SEEKING BEHAVIORS/
CONSTANT CRY FOR HELP (SEEK VALIDATION OF EXISTENCE & SUPPORT) – FEAR – SPLIT BEING
PHYSICAL BODY
SELFISH/GREEDY/ ENTITLED/ CONTROLLING
COMPETITVE/ REPULSED & OPPOSED/
POWERLESS/ HELPLESS/ NOT COMFORTABLE
LIES
MISUNDERSTAND
DON’T KNOW HOW
DENIAL (CAN’T SEE)
SEARCHING
Heart blocked false
identity. Live life of
separation and searching
without finding. Lies of
misunderstanding,
assumptions –
conclusions-opinions-
beliefs (ACOBs). Driven
by false memories of
worth. Fear of the
unknown – of existence.

14. PARADOXICAL EXISTENCE – CONTINUED
THIS REPETITIOUS PATTERN BECOMES A MAJOR PARADOX
OF HUMAN EXISTENCE AS THE WISH TO BE GOOD (MOM &
DAD LOVE ME TO SMILE & BE HAPPY) WORKS – IS IN
CONTRADICTION TO THE ORIGINAL CONDITIONED
RESPONSE & IS INTERMITTENTLY REINFORCED.
“I HAVE TO CRY TO GET WHAT I WANT AS FAST AS I WANT
IT, FOR THEM TO BE KIND TO ME.”

15. MATURE ADULT SYNERGY HEART IN BALANCE -
CONNECTION WITHIN & WITHOUT PEACE & FREEDOM
ACTION-IN-RELATIONSHIP
AWARENESS HEART-CENTERED
FULFILL PRESENT NECESSITIES
KNOW
CONNECTION
SOUL
ONENESS – LIFE IS US
THROUGH WHAT WE
SEE AND BE
(Understand, Know,
Awareness).
Soul–Heart Connection/
Opportunities for
change/ Acceptance of
healthy complementary
differences/ Lifelong
learning and growth

16. MATURE SYNERGY ADULT – CONTINUED
“Coherence is the state when the heart, mind and emotions
are in energetic alignment and cooperation. It is a state that
builds resiliency – personal energy is accumulated, not
wasted, - leaving more energy to manifest intentions and
harmonious outcomes.”
~ Dr. Rollin McCraty, HeartMath Institute

17. TRANSCENDENCE
SYNERGY HEART IN ACTION – IN - RELATIONSHIP
ONENESS – HEART CENTERED
SPARK OF LOVE – LIFE - GOODNESS
UNCONDITIONAL LOVE
POINT OF AWARENESS
SEEING – BEING
KNOWING
DIRECT PERCEPTION

18. THE PROCESS OF
HEART-CENTERED MENTORING
ACTION-IN-RELATIONSHIP
THE WHOLISTIC WAY TO SELF-KNOWLEDGE AND SELF
AWARENESS
When you are ready--have passed through the stages of:
• Pre-Contemplation
• Contemplation
• Preparation
• Ready to Change

19. • Pre-Contemplation (not thinking seriously about changing),
• Contemplation (feeling ambivalent about taking the next
step; may be considering the possibility),
• Preparation (have usually made a recent attempt to change
behavior; usually taking some small steps toward changing.
Believe that change is necessary and that the time for
change is imminent. Reading and asking questions about
items in this booklet is a positive step.) and are now
• Ready to Change (Actively taking steps to change).
Prochaska & DiClemente, 1983
Prochaska, DiClemente and Norcross, 1992

20. • There is support in the form of Advanced Mentors to
guide your passage through the change process that is
the path to Self-Knowledge and Self-Awareness.
• In this initial stage of gaining self-knowledge, this is not a
process that can be effectively done by oneself, or with
inexperienced guidance, for your mentor must be able to
help you reach a new level of consciousness in order to
break through. As Dr. Einstein simply stated it: "No
problem can be solved from the same level of
consciousness that created it.” ~ Albert Einstein

21. • Human Beings have an elaborate brain and body system of
denial that makes access to certain memories difficult. Most
people simply cannot see themselves within the "ball of yarn" of
memories that they have perpetrated in their lifetimes.
• Within the Heart-centered Mentoring process, there are models
of self-similar emotion/fear patterns that make it easier for
experienced mentors to more quickly help you solve the puzzles
of your existence.
• If you have opportunity to attend a program on this process, it
will also expedite your deep understanding, private process
work, and eventual change. The "Heart-Centered Mentoring
Synopsis" booklet aids in your understanding.

22. • The Heart-Centered process begins with a series of intensive
informational sessions, including the information from the
Synopsis of development from Separation to Connection
given in Part I of the booklet synopsis. This may be 12 hours
of individual 2 hour sessions over the period of two weeks, or
over a week end seminar. The change process is a separate
private arrangement following the intensives.
• Also included in the intensive is a time line of your life events
from birth to the present, and providing biographical
information on both parents and/or other caregivers. This
information is critical in understanding oneself.

23. • You, with mentor assistance, will then proceed through a
process, a wholistic (cognitions, emotions, and behaviors)
model of change leading to eventual Connection within and
between the systems within your body-mind and, ultimately
your soul-heart. It may take several of these processes to
learn deeply about yourself. However, after the first few
processes there is a briefer version that is used. By then,
you have already gained much self-knowledge, and are now
connecting with your body memories that are still blocking
your soul-heart.

24. THE PROCESS OF CHANGE
THE KEY TO TRANSFORMATION IS TO
• RECOGNIZE YOUR ATTENTION SEEKING ACTIONS,
• ASKING YOURSELF WHY YOU ARE DOING IT (WHAT AM I
DOING IT FOR)
• SEEKING AND FINDING THE UNDERLYING FALSE SELF-
EVALUATION FOR SEEKING ATTENTION E.G., “I AM STUPID”
• THEN RELEASING THE PHYSICAL EMOTIONS AND
SENSATIONS OF FEAR HIDING IN YOUR SUBCONSCIOUS
MIND BEHIND THESE FALSE BELIEFS,
• AND THEN CONSCIOUSLY AND CONSISTENTLY TAKING NEW
ACTION THAT YOU HAVE BEEN AFRAID TO DO.
THIS WORK TAKES A LEVEL OF DEPTH NOT EASILY ATTAINED
INITIALLY ON ONE’S OWN, THUS WORKING WITH TRAINED
MENTOR’S IS CRITICAL FOR TRUE CHANGE. ADVANCED
PROCESSES HAVE BEEN DEVELOPED TO ALLOW THE PASSAGE
TO THE SUBCONSCIOUS. IT REQUIRES ESTABLISHING A
RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR SUBCONSCIOUS MIND.

25. GLOSSARY
ATTENTION SEEKING BEHAVIOR/PARADOX OF EXISTENCE:
• Any attitude or physical behavior that is based on a subconscious "cry
for help" to be noticed/recognized. This may be inner or outer, negative
or positive, and at core defensively motivated for survival.
• The subconscious mind believes it must have an outer source for safety,
security, comfort and certainty (parent proxy) to take care of them, or
they will not survive. This root cause from the womb has branched out
to many defensive branches depending on the modeling and environment
of the child. This is the manifestation of the misunderstanding in the
brain that it must re-create the separation from the womb and the need
to "cry out" --be bad to be seen and connected. These separation
behaviors are the source of poor choices and unhappiness, and are
released in Heart-Centered Mentoring.
• The paradox is the contradiction between what the subconscious mind
believes is necessary for survival, and what is true consciously in reality.

26. CONNECTION:
• Connection to the newborn child, and what human beings seek the rest
of their lives, is the womb condition. Human love is too often based on
these expectations, and when not met, conflict begins and the
relationship, whatever it is, ends--and the search begins for a
replacement.
• A synonym for connection is support of the other, as in kindness,
treating as you would like to be treated.
• True Connection, without conditions, is unconditional love and
acceptance. That is love without judgment or expectation.
• We perceive that Life is Us through the worldview that “To See is to Be,
and to Be is to See One.” What we understand (know) through this
heart centered worldview and our ensuing actions, creates our reality.
This is living from our True Self, who we are when fully mature, and
connecting with our heart-soul-- no longer living in childhood
misunderstandings. Many persons struggle with the wish for this
connection, yet experience only separation.

27. SEPARATION:
• The Heart Centered Mentoring Program uncovers and works with the
conditioned blockages of misunderstandings of who we are, why our lives
are not working and how we continuously create pain, suffering and
sorrow by living by what we do not know [emotion based fear and
conditioned assumptions, conclusions, opinions and beliefs (ACOBs)].
This is, basically, living a lie, that is, illusions created by shadowed
memories of past events.
SYNERGY HEART:
• This is a way of living where we find in life the depth and value that
comes through the mutuality and interconnectedness offered by our heart
- - an intelligence of living together in a daily life of compassion, kindness,
friendship and unconditional love.