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Gymnastics Parent 
Here at TIGAR I enjoy the unique role of being both a gym 
parent and a gym owner, so as our recreation program 
continues to grow, and with the recent close of our compulsory 
competition season culminating with several state champions 
and the start of our optional and boys competitive gymnastics 
and competitive cheer seasons off to a flying start, the athletes 
at TIGAR fill me with pride every day. 
As much as I enjoy my dual roles, there are certainly times 
when the roles run in opposite directions. Because gymnastics and cheerleading can be so taxing 
on the body, being the parent of a competitive athlete can be stressful, whether it be watching a 
first time TIGAR Cub in our recreation program, seeing a tall cheer pyramid forming before my 
eyes, or following an elite gymnast training for international competition. With that in mind I 
thought I’d take this opportunity to share some things I’ve discovered along the way that might 
make the role of being a gym parent a little easier. 
First, I think it’s important to remember why we bring our kids here. It’s fun to envision and 
dream about future gold medals and listening to the Star Spangled Banner as the Stars and 
Stripes are raised to the rafters, but reality is, of the roughly 60,000 kids enrolled in USAG gyms 
across America, fewer than 20 will ever make the national team, fewer than 850 will receive 
Division I NCAA scholarships and there are only so many state and regional championships to 
be won. Don’t get me wrong, I encourage these kids to dream the biggest dreams possible, and I 
love hanging championship banners in our rafters, but more than that, I encourage these kids to 
learn the joys of being part of a team, to grow their self-esteem, to learn basic gymnastics and 
cheer fundamentals, and above all, have fun. As a parent it is our job to stress these factors first 
and foremost. Doctor Alison Arnold, mental coach for the YouTube – gymnastics parenting by 
Doc Ali that all parents of competitive athletes, especially those who compete in judged sports, 
will benefit from watching. 
We all love our kids and want the best for them, which is the environment we’re striving for at 
TIGAR, but there can be such a fine line between being a supportive parent, and being 
something other than that. We’ve all seen this “other” parent at practices or meets, who seems to 
have taken the intensity a bit too far. 
Take the quiz below and see where you land. I took it along with a couple other team parents, 
and without divulging our exact scores, we all learned that we have room for improvement. 
Thanks for reading, and as always, thanks for letting TIGAR be a part of your life. 
Beth
Take this questionnaire to see if you’re doing everything possible to help your child have a 
successful and healthy sports experience. Answer each question with a 1, 2, 3 or 4. 1 = never 
true; 2 = occasionally true; 3 = mostly true; 4 = always true. 
1) I get really frustrated and upset when my child performs below his/her capabilities. 
2) I give my child critical feedback on his/her performance after each game. 
3) If I didn’t push my child, he/she wouldn’t practice. 
4) If my child doesn’t excel and win, I see very little point in his participating in the sport. 
5) I can be very critical when my child makes mistakes or loses. 
6) I set goals with my child in relation to the sport. 
7) I think it’s my job to motivate my child to get better. 
8) I feel angry and embarrassed when my child performs poorly. 
9) The most important thing for my child’s sport participation is that he/she have fun. 
10) I get really upset with bad calls by the officials. 
11) Most coaches don’t know what they are talking about. 
12) I keep a performance log/journal/statistics on my child’s performance so we can monitor 
his/her progress. 
13) I feel guilty about some of the things I say to my child after he/she plays. 
14) I try to watch most practices so that I can correct my child when he makes mistakes. 
15) When my child fails I can feel his pain and disappointment. 
16) I think it’s important that my child gets used to having coaches yell at him/her to help 
prepare him/her for life. 
17) My spouse and I argue about how I treat my son/daughter in relation to his/her sport. 
18) I try to help my child keep his/her failures and the sport in perspective. 
19) I’m never very concerned about the outcome of my child’s game/match/race. 
20) I will not allow my child to be put down or yelled at by a coach.
21) If my child wasn’t so defensive when it comes to my feedback, he/she could become a better 
athlete. 
22) It’s not my job to evaluate or criticize my child’s performances. 
23) I feel that my child owes us a certain performance level given all the sacrifices we’ve made 
for him/her. 
24) I believe my child’s sport belongs to him/her and not to me. 
25) I just want my child to feel good about him/herself and be happy when he/she plays. 
SCORING Add scores for questions #1-8, 10-14,16, 17, 21 & 23. (If you answered question #2 
with a “mostly true” you add 3 points to the total score.) Subtract scores for questions #9, 15, 18- 
20, 22, 24, & 25. INTERPRETATION The higher the score, the more potential damage that you 
are doing to your child. High scores indicate that you are playing the wrong role on the team and 
if you continue, you will increase the chances of your child burning out, struggling with 
performance problems and dropping out. Low scores mean that you are on track and doing the 
things necessary to insure that your child has a positive and life-enriching sports experience. If 
you scored a: 
60 – 50: You are doing everything in your power to seriously damage your child’s self-esteem, 
ruin their sports experience and make them a candidate for long term psychotherapy later on in 
their life. If you continue your ways, your child will most likely drop out of sports. If you force 
them to continue, chances are good that they will struggle with serious performance problems. 
On the off chance that they do achieve success, they will not be able to appreciate what they’ve 
accomplished. Finally, your long term relationship with them will be seriously jeopardized 
because of your lack of perspective and behaviors. 
49 – 39: You are not being supportive enough and are doing too many things wrong. You are 
over-involved and putting too much pressure on your child. You need to back down, chill out 
and let them enjoy their sport. This kind of a parental stance will drive your child out of sports. 
38 – 20: You’re OK, but you need some help getting unhooked. You need to be more 
consistently supportive and take less of a pushing/coaching role. 
19 – 1: You are pretty much on track as a parent. You are positive and doing most of the right 
things to insure your child has a positive youth sports experience. 
0 – negative 15: BRAVO!!!! You are truly a winning parent. You can give workshops to other 
parents on how to help your child become successful in their sport.

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Gymnastics Parent | Tigar Gymnastics

  • 1. Gymnastics Parent Here at TIGAR I enjoy the unique role of being both a gym parent and a gym owner, so as our recreation program continues to grow, and with the recent close of our compulsory competition season culminating with several state champions and the start of our optional and boys competitive gymnastics and competitive cheer seasons off to a flying start, the athletes at TIGAR fill me with pride every day. As much as I enjoy my dual roles, there are certainly times when the roles run in opposite directions. Because gymnastics and cheerleading can be so taxing on the body, being the parent of a competitive athlete can be stressful, whether it be watching a first time TIGAR Cub in our recreation program, seeing a tall cheer pyramid forming before my eyes, or following an elite gymnast training for international competition. With that in mind I thought I’d take this opportunity to share some things I’ve discovered along the way that might make the role of being a gym parent a little easier. First, I think it’s important to remember why we bring our kids here. It’s fun to envision and dream about future gold medals and listening to the Star Spangled Banner as the Stars and Stripes are raised to the rafters, but reality is, of the roughly 60,000 kids enrolled in USAG gyms across America, fewer than 20 will ever make the national team, fewer than 850 will receive Division I NCAA scholarships and there are only so many state and regional championships to be won. Don’t get me wrong, I encourage these kids to dream the biggest dreams possible, and I love hanging championship banners in our rafters, but more than that, I encourage these kids to learn the joys of being part of a team, to grow their self-esteem, to learn basic gymnastics and cheer fundamentals, and above all, have fun. As a parent it is our job to stress these factors first and foremost. Doctor Alison Arnold, mental coach for the YouTube – gymnastics parenting by Doc Ali that all parents of competitive athletes, especially those who compete in judged sports, will benefit from watching. We all love our kids and want the best for them, which is the environment we’re striving for at TIGAR, but there can be such a fine line between being a supportive parent, and being something other than that. We’ve all seen this “other” parent at practices or meets, who seems to have taken the intensity a bit too far. Take the quiz below and see where you land. I took it along with a couple other team parents, and without divulging our exact scores, we all learned that we have room for improvement. Thanks for reading, and as always, thanks for letting TIGAR be a part of your life. Beth
  • 2. Take this questionnaire to see if you’re doing everything possible to help your child have a successful and healthy sports experience. Answer each question with a 1, 2, 3 or 4. 1 = never true; 2 = occasionally true; 3 = mostly true; 4 = always true. 1) I get really frustrated and upset when my child performs below his/her capabilities. 2) I give my child critical feedback on his/her performance after each game. 3) If I didn’t push my child, he/she wouldn’t practice. 4) If my child doesn’t excel and win, I see very little point in his participating in the sport. 5) I can be very critical when my child makes mistakes or loses. 6) I set goals with my child in relation to the sport. 7) I think it’s my job to motivate my child to get better. 8) I feel angry and embarrassed when my child performs poorly. 9) The most important thing for my child’s sport participation is that he/she have fun. 10) I get really upset with bad calls by the officials. 11) Most coaches don’t know what they are talking about. 12) I keep a performance log/journal/statistics on my child’s performance so we can monitor his/her progress. 13) I feel guilty about some of the things I say to my child after he/she plays. 14) I try to watch most practices so that I can correct my child when he makes mistakes. 15) When my child fails I can feel his pain and disappointment. 16) I think it’s important that my child gets used to having coaches yell at him/her to help prepare him/her for life. 17) My spouse and I argue about how I treat my son/daughter in relation to his/her sport. 18) I try to help my child keep his/her failures and the sport in perspective. 19) I’m never very concerned about the outcome of my child’s game/match/race. 20) I will not allow my child to be put down or yelled at by a coach.
  • 3. 21) If my child wasn’t so defensive when it comes to my feedback, he/she could become a better athlete. 22) It’s not my job to evaluate or criticize my child’s performances. 23) I feel that my child owes us a certain performance level given all the sacrifices we’ve made for him/her. 24) I believe my child’s sport belongs to him/her and not to me. 25) I just want my child to feel good about him/herself and be happy when he/she plays. SCORING Add scores for questions #1-8, 10-14,16, 17, 21 & 23. (If you answered question #2 with a “mostly true” you add 3 points to the total score.) Subtract scores for questions #9, 15, 18- 20, 22, 24, & 25. INTERPRETATION The higher the score, the more potential damage that you are doing to your child. High scores indicate that you are playing the wrong role on the team and if you continue, you will increase the chances of your child burning out, struggling with performance problems and dropping out. Low scores mean that you are on track and doing the things necessary to insure that your child has a positive and life-enriching sports experience. If you scored a: 60 – 50: You are doing everything in your power to seriously damage your child’s self-esteem, ruin their sports experience and make them a candidate for long term psychotherapy later on in their life. If you continue your ways, your child will most likely drop out of sports. If you force them to continue, chances are good that they will struggle with serious performance problems. On the off chance that they do achieve success, they will not be able to appreciate what they’ve accomplished. Finally, your long term relationship with them will be seriously jeopardized because of your lack of perspective and behaviors. 49 – 39: You are not being supportive enough and are doing too many things wrong. You are over-involved and putting too much pressure on your child. You need to back down, chill out and let them enjoy their sport. This kind of a parental stance will drive your child out of sports. 38 – 20: You’re OK, but you need some help getting unhooked. You need to be more consistently supportive and take less of a pushing/coaching role. 19 – 1: You are pretty much on track as a parent. You are positive and doing most of the right things to insure your child has a positive youth sports experience. 0 – negative 15: BRAVO!!!! You are truly a winning parent. You can give workshops to other parents on how to help your child become successful in their sport.