A presentation that centers around what hospice patients know that the rest of us don't and how we can awaken to a more conscious and joy-filled life.

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Karen Wyatt MD
December 11, 2014
Highland City Club
Conscious Living and Dying:
What Really Matters

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Outline
1. My Story
2. What Hospice Patients Know
3. Awakened Life Lessons
4. Stages of Conscious Development
5. Tools for the Journey – maintain an Awakened Life of Joy

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Who Am I?
• Family practice physician
• Many years of experience
as hospice medical director
• Storyteller and writer
• Lifelong seeker of spiritual
wisdom

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What do hospice
patients know
that the rest of
us don’t?

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The End-of-Life is
a time of significant
GROWTH
and
TRANSFORMATION
Why??
?

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People who know
they will soon die
begin to look at
“What Really
Matters”
in life…
Love
Forgiveness
Meaning

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Growth and Transformation occur for
people at the end-of-life because …
…instead of focusing on

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Growth and Transformation occur for
people at the end-of-life because …
they focus on
Beginning …
to live Fully …
in each and every
moment

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But do we have
to wait until we
are dying to
begin to live fully
in each and
every moment?
No!

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We can
WAKE UP and
begin to live
“What Really
Matters” right
now!

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Stages of Human Development
You can begin to live an “Awakened Life” NOW
instead of waiting for the end-of-life
Infancy/T
oddler-hood
School Age
Adolescence
Adulthood
End-of-Life
Birth
Death
Awakened
Life

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To transform
the way we live
Awakened
Life
Lessons …

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What do hospice
patients know
that the rest of
us don’t?

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Awakened Life
Lesson #1
Suffering:
Go into
your discomfort

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Lesson #1: Embrace rather than
resist your challenges

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Awakened Life
Lesson #2
Love:
Find the
LOVE
in every
situation

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Lesson #2: LOVE connects us all

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Awakened Life
Lesson #3:
Forgiveness:
Let go of
the past

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Lesson #3: No blame, no shame

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Awakened Life
Lesson #4:
Presence:
Be right here,
right now

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Lesson #4: Find the BEAUTY in
everything

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Awakened Life
Lesson #5
Purpose:
Make every
experience your
teacher

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Lesson 5: Know you are enough

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Awakened Life
Lesson #6
Surrender:
Ride the waves
of life

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Lesson #6: Let go of your plans

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Awakened Life
Lesson #7:
Impermanence:
Let LIFE
change you

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Lesson #7: There is beauty in
brokenness

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How we grow …
Stages of
Conscious
Development

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4 Stages of Human Development
Based on the work of Ken Wilber and Carol Gilligan
I. Egocentric
II. Sociocentric
III. Worldcentric
IV. Integrated or “Kosmocentric”

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4 Stages of Human Development:
I. Egocentric II. Socio-centric
III. World-centric
IV. Kosmo-centric
*Based on the work of Carol Gilligan and Ken Wilber

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Ultimate Concern for Each Stage of
Development:
I. Egocentric:
Self/Symptoms
II. Socio-centric
III. World-centric
IV. Kosmo-centric

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Ultimate Concern for Egocentric
Stage: Self/Symptoms
Lesson 1:
Suffering

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Ultimate Concern for Each Stage of
Development:
SHO-0712-2DC-4N
II. Sociocentric:
Relationships
III. World-centric
IV. Kosmo-centric

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Ultimate Concern for Sociocentric
Stage: Relationships
Lessons 2, 3:
Love
Forgiveness

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Ultimate Concern for Each Stage of
Development:
SHO-0712-2DC-4N
III. Worldcentric:
Meaning
IV. Kosmo-centric

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Ultimate Concern for Worldcentric
Stage: Meaning
Lessons 4, 5:
Present Moment
Purpose

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Ultimate Concern for Each Stage of
Development:
SHO-0712-2DC-4N
IV. Kosmocentric:
Mystical/Divine
Consciousness

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Ultimate Concern for Kosmocentric
Stage: Mystical Consciousness
Lessons 6, 7:
Surrender
Impermanence

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Ultimate Concern for Each Stage of
Development:
I.
Sociocentric
Self/Sympto
ms
II.
Kosmocentric
Relation-ships
III.
Meaning
IV.
Mystical/Di
vine
Egocentric
Worldcentric

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Ultimate Concern for Each Stage of
Development:
I.
Self/Sympto
ms

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Ultimate Concern for Each Stage of
Development:
I.
Self/Sympto
ms
II.
Relation-ships

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Ultimate Concern for Each Stage of
Development:
I.
Self/Sympto
ms
II.
Relation-ships
III.
Meaning

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Ultimate Concern for Each Stage of
Development:
I.
Self/Sympto
ms
II.
Relation-ships
III.
Meaning
IV.
Mystical/Di
vine

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And the true meaning of
Joy
The Cycle
of Life …

45. Life
The Cycle
Of
Life

46. The Cycle
Of
Life

47. JOY

48. + Joie de Vivre:
The enjoyment of simply being alive –
no matter what life has brought to you

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Joie de Vivre:
to enjoy EVERYTHING about being alive
Moments of PLEASURE … Times of PAIN …

50. P
l
e
a
s
u
r
e
P
a
i
n
JOY

51. Joy

52. To find TRUE
Joy
in an
Awakened
Life …
we must
embrace both
the Pleasure
AND
the Pain
of life

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How to maintain an
awakened life of
true JOY
Strategy and
Tools for the
Journey…

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What do hospice
patients know
that the rest of
us don’t?

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Strategy :
Move toward
INTEGRATION
(“Kosmos”)
in everything
you do

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Strategy :
Stay
BALANCED
in the
Present Moment

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Lao Tzu:
If you are depressed
you are living in the past.
If you are anxious
you are living in the future.
If you are at peace
you are living in the present.

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To balance in the Present Moment
you must learn to …
Let Go of the Past:
Forgive
Stop Worrying About the
Future: Trust

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Balance in the Present Moment
Forgiveness Practices:
 Ho’oponopono
 I’m sorry
 I love you
 Please forgive me
 Thank you
 4-View Forgiveness Process
 Third Person View
 Second Person View
 First Person View
 Galaxy View
 Rituals for Forgiveness

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Balance in the Present Moment
Trust Practices:
 Dissolving Limiting Beliefs
 Do you believe it?
 Why do you believe it?
 Do you know it’s true?
 What would happen if you no longer believed it?
 Serenity Practice
 God, Give us the grace to accept with serenity the things that cannot be
changed, Courage to change the things which should be changed, And
the wisdom to distinguish the one from the other.
 What CAN you change? What’s holding you back from changing it?
 What CAN’T you change? What will it take to let go?

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Balance in the Present Moment
Practices for Presence:
 Deep Breathing
 Take a Deep Breath – in 5 counts and out 5 counts to help calm
your anxiety and focus your attention
 Mindfulness Meditation
 Place a small bit of food with a powerful taste in your mouth
(chocolate, strawberry, lemon drop)
 Focus totally on the experience: taste, texture, aroma
 Daily A.W.E. Practice
 I am AWAKE to all possibilities today.
 I am WILLING to see the good in everything that happens.
 I am fully ENGAGED with life in every moment.

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Summary:
7 Key Lessons from Hospice Patients
1. Go into your discomfort and embrace your challenges.
2. Find the LOVE in every situation for love connects us all.
3. Let go of the past with no blame and no shame.
4. Be right here, right now and find the beauty in everything.
5. Make every experience your teacher and know you are
enough.
6. Ride the waves of life and let go of your plans.
7. Let life change you for there is beauty in brokenness.

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Learn to live with
JOY in the
present moment!
It is What Really
Matters.

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Sign the Email List!
I will send you:
 Handouts on all the Tools I mentioned today
 End-of-Life Preparedness Assessment
 BE Ready Checklist for End-of-Life Planning
 List of Online Resources for the End-of-Life

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End-of-Life University
FREE Online Interview Series
www.EOLUniversity.com

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Upcoming Events
8- Week Interactive Online Group Class
Spring 2015
Tools and Tactics Spiritual Strategies
Mindset Shifts Relationship Retooling
How to view chronic or terminal illness
as a sacred spiritual path.
www.karenwyattmd.com

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Thank you!
I’ve enjoyed speaking with you today …
Connect with me:
Website: www.karenwyattmd.com
Email: karen@karenwyattmd.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/karenwyattmd
Twitter: @spiritualmd