1.
The
Journey
of
Going
from
Good
to
Great.
Capstone
with
Ashraf
Ayoub
General
Contracting
LLC.
Omneya
Ayoub
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Table of Contents
ABSTRACT …………………………………………………………………page 3
CHAPTER 1- Background Information…………………………………...page 4
! Background
! Reality of the Consultant
! Phase 1: Entry, MBTI, Family Theory
! Phase 2: System Diagnosis
! Phase 3: Contracting
! Goals for Change
! Key Performance Indicators
! Goals in Managing Myself in My Role
CHAPTER 2- Intervention Design & Summary……..…………………..page 32
! Phase 1: Family Dynamics
o Laying Foundations
o Fierce Conversations
o The Decision Tree
! Phase 2: Leadership Development through Coaching
o Laying Foundations
o Coaching Meetings
o Raising Covert Processes through Meeting Design
o Sustainability Binder
! Summary: The Journey
CHAPTER 3- Personal Impact of Capstone……………………………..page 45
CHAPTER 4- An Unexpected Gift……………………………………….page 46
APPENDIX A- Meeting Design…………………………………………..page 48
WORKS CITED…………………………………………………………..page 56
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ABSTRACT
As an outside consultant to Ashraf Ayoub General Contractor LLC, I will portray for you
our journey together in transforming his company into a great corporation. We will explore not
only leadership styles and culture but, in addition, family dynamics and underlying covert
processes. Through each of these pathways we will grab a new pair of lenses to diagnose the
organization for a more comprehensive understanding of who they are. By splitting the
organization diagnosis into layers an intervention design for each level helped propel Ashraf’s
company forward. Lets embark on the journey of trial and error, knowledge, and success
together!
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CHAPTER 1: Background Information
Background
Ashraf Ayoub, the owner of Ashraf Ayoub General Contracting LLC, was born and
raised in Cairo, Egypt. From the age of 16 he would go to school and work at upholstery shops,
mastering the art of making furniture. He loved the hands on work in his jobs and decided to take
it up as a career. Working in different shops he was able to pick up skills such as art, details of
his work, clean finishes on furniture, and the motivation for success. These qualities are now the
foundation of his company. As the years passed, he worked hard in school and was at the top of
his class during his high school and college years. After obtaining a degree in Engineering and
qualifying to be a teacher at a tech school, in 1986, he decided to pursue opening up his own
shop in Egypt. The business started out as a small shop in the building he lived in and eventually
became three, each specializing in a different aspect of the furniture making process. He named
this business ‘Mohandes El Asasat El Hadisa,’ meaning ‘Engineering of Modern Furniture’. The
business was growing and so was Ashraf Ayoub’s ambition.
During this time he was getting ready to migrate to the US, with his family. In 1997, he
sold his three shops in Egypt to his brother and came to the US to start out small again. Starting
out from the bottom was hard. During the year of 1997 he worked many jobs, training Arabian
horses, baking at Dunkin Donuts, a shop worker at Amer Industrial Technology, and a cashier at
Sunoco. Finally, in 1998 he became a fulltime employee at Lenape Builders in Middletown, De.
Working there for three years he learned new skills, instead of upholstery he learned more about
building and construction. He found this easier than upholstery because it did not require as
much detailed work. Congruent with his work, was night school at a community college to learn
English. After some time, Ashraf gained enough confidence, in 2001, to obtain his own license
in construction for the state of Delaware. Later in 2001, he left Lenape Builders to work full time
in a cabinet making shop. A full time employee at Bancroft during the day and a self-employed
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construction worker in the evening, Ashraf definitely had a plan in mind. It was not until 2006
did he decide to branch out into his own business, due to the constraints keeping him from
expressing his passion in his work. In employment conditions, designs were set and creativity
was not needed from the employees. He felt a need to make designs of his own and to create his
own work. Ashraf put in his two weeks notice at work and left. The next part of the journey
started with the purchase of his first work van, in addition to, his own logo. The more time he
invested in his company, the more customers’ he gained. His licensure grew from Delaware to
Pennsylvania and now Maryland. The mission of the company was to create diversified products
with the consideration of the client’s wishes. The company started out small and has been
expanding since. They pride on quality over quantity, cost-effectiveness, and efficiency/comfort
of the client.
Consultant Perspective
In looking at the previous description, many would think so what’s the problem?
However, lets take a look at the company from a different perspective or as some say “new
lenses”. This company did not need to fix problems it needed to transform. The intention was to
understand the owner, the culture, and the employees to help them go from good to great on their
journey to success.
The initial dialogue at the company was with Ashraf and his son Eslam. Before diving
deeper, the reader should be attuned to the fact that Ashraf is my father and Eslam, is my brother.
So before our initial dialogue we already had preset relationships and trust. From this I was able
to derive a working relationship with them in that we are all in this “family business”. This first
introduction was the hardest because there were many paths to take, deciding on which one will
set the stage for the company moving forward. In the story that will unfold the reader will see the
company go through various phases of discovery. These phases include: phase one -
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understanding the personality of Ashraf & Eslam, the company culture, the family status, and
how we will work together. Phase two involves creating team visions and an outside consultant
diagnosis. The last phase concludes with a company shift and contracting. To begin the journey,
I asked myself, how do Ashraf and Eslam think? What is it like to be employed in their company
and how will we establish a working relationship?
Phase One: Entry and Relationships
ENTRY
During the month of September in 2014, I had decided to embark on a journey with
Ashraf Ayoub General Contracting LLC. I scheduled a date for our first meeting not knowing
what to expect, for I am his daughter who soon will become his consultant. In order to be better
prepared, I grounded myself with a consultant stance. As a consultant I was only a “change agent
to the person in charge”, a partner that can “facilitate, coach, and self-direct change” (Markshak,
2006, p.15, 21). With these considerations in mind, a list was formulated on tasks to be
accomplished in the upcoming meeting. These tasks ranged from the client’s expectations, my
expectations, developing trust, to achieving a mutual understanding on how to proceed. In doing
so I was able to negate the notion of Ashraf seeing me as “an extra pair of hands” (Block, 2011,
p.24).
Since a brief outline of the meeting was ready, not much more preparation was needed.
For my needs as a consultant I wanted the conversation to be authentic in hearing out my client
and establishing our relationship. It was a months long project and taking the time to talk was
essential in our initial meeting. So, what happened? Nothing! As much to my surprise, I only got
one thing out of the initial meeting, that Ashraf, Eslam, and I had a good grasp on our working
relationship. In times of discussion I was no longer their daughter or sister but their consultant.
My first meeting was a rookie meeting, nothing went as planned because I was missing the
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picture of who my clients were. In the following weeks, I observed the company, the culture,
gave personality tests to my clients, and finally began to have a clear idea with whom I was
dealing with.
MBTI
During the interim period, my clients and I took a Myers Briggs Type Indicator or MBTI,
in order to understand what strengths or compromises will keep us in partnership. The MBTI
assesses a person’s preferences in how they associate with others, order their life, come to
decisions, and a variety of other contexts. The results of the test helped portray how the strengths
of Ashraf and Eslam showed in their leadership styles and in essence reflected into the culture of
their company. In Table 1.1, the results of the exam explain our working partnership.
Establishing a Middle Ground
ESTJ - Ashraf/Eslam INFJ - Omneya
Relationship Discussion Needed Relationship
Extrovert
Appreciates a
active listening
ear.
When the extrovert gets
carried away causing the
introvert to overwork by not
giving them their alone time.
Fascinated by
bubbly nature
of extroverts.
Introvert
Sensing
Appreciates
imagination &
creativity of
the intuitive
When the individuals begin
to speak different
languages and neither is
heard or understood
Appreciates the
realistic
thinking of
sensors
Intuition
Thinking
Appreciates
compassion &
empathy
When the thinker says harsh
words it can cause feelers
hurt. Both sides begin to be
impatient with each other.
Needs
constructive
criticism &
honesty
Feeling
Judging
Order,
scheduled, and
task-oriented
When both are organized
heated arguments arise
because of strong opinions to
their own perspectives.
Order,
scheduled, and
task-oriented
Judging
Table 1.1: The table shows the results of the MBTI. It portrays what is needed to be in partnership with the client
and when to recognize a difference of opinion.
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CULTURE
A few aspects came to light after the MBTI, the first being my father and my brother had
the same test results, however the reality was different. They may be the same from the context
of the MBTI but culturally they differed. Ashraf was raised in Egypt and was taught how to play
the market. Eslam graduated from an American college with a different notion about the business
world. After graduation Eslam started working with the company, having only a little over a year
of employment at the company during this process. This means the culture of the company had
been established years prior and was introduced to a culture clash upon his employment.
In prior years the company culture was structured, efficiency minded, low cost,
penetrated the market, and focused on outside company relationships. This is what’s referred to
as both a control (hierarchical) and compete (market) culture. In essence a company run on this
dynamic had “an authority figure who made decisions and kept track of the processes”, in
addition, they focused on relationships with “suppliers, customers, and regulators” (Tharp, 2009,
p. 3-5). This is no other definition than an autocratic leader with a twist, the twist being Ashraf
knows how to be a people’s person. By definition an autocratic leader is one who has complete
control of decisions, takes no input from employees, and dictates all the work (Goleman, 2000).
As efficient as it may seem to have a construction company utilize this culture, it causes conflict
when Ashraf and Eslam are both leaders but are not on the same page.
In contrast to Ashraf, Eslam graduated with a mechanical engineering degree, where
collaboration and teamwork was prized. This dynamic is what he translated to the company and
with that came a democratic leader. A democratic leader creates a culture of collaboration, he
shares a lot of himself, and likes consensus (Goleman, 2000; Tharp 2009). One can see how such
differing attitudes sends mixed signals to the employees and causes miscommunication between
both leaders. An analysis of what these cultures look like is portrayed in Table 1.2. This analysis
is based on the five-window framework approach to cultures, in which the culture of the
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organization is viewed through different lenses. These lenses include: leadership, norms &
practices, stories & legends, traditions &rituals, and symbols (Levin, 2000, p.86). Through these
lenses, themes and correlations are assessed to understand the big picture about the culture
(Refer Table 1.2).
Five Windows Into Culture
Window Ashraf Eslam
Heroes: father & Egypt president Heroes: father & great uncle
Proud of his business Team work to build a car model
Wants to have a large corporation Wants: CEO of fortune 500Leadership
Toke risks on expanding company Built his own clientele
No talk about emotions Clear agenda and schedule
Do your work right = good Structure to allow growth
I make the decisions Seeks help from othersNorms & Practices
I say what needs to be done Jobs compliment competence
Feared and respected Easily persuaded
Trusted for his expertise Leadership needs grounding
He can't be fooled Employees don't listen to himStories & Legends
Goal Oriented Can go with the flow
Will talk but not negotiate Lenient with employees
Mistakes cost money Spend money to save effort
Try to be cost efficient Less Control
Traditions &
Rituals Work 12hrs/7 days/week Work: 8-5 5days/ week
Company shirt and steel boots Wishes to dress up to work
Office is at home (disorganized) Shares home office with dad
Logo includes name Company logo with dad's nameSymbols
Colloquial slang/ deficient English Communication clear & concise
As can be seen, the same company can run differently with these cultural perspectives.
Yet, another layer allowed for a deeper meaning, a company with these diverse leaders could still
be run as an efficient and better company. However, in order to do so there needs to be forward
movement instead of a stalemate. Taking into consideration that these two individuals are father
and son, they have a preset relationship and notions about who the other is. This becomes
Table
1.2:
The
table
gives
an
overview
of
how
the
leadership
style
of
a
leader
can
change
the
culture
and
the
management
of
the
same
organization.
(Levin,
2000)
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important when both fall into the cycle of temporal blindness. Meaning as father and son they
have preconceived notions about each other in terms of actions, speech, lifestyle, and family
matters. Yet when falling into temporal blindness individuals get stuck in the past preventing
them from moving forward because they do not see each other as they are in their current status
(Oshry, 2007, p. 35-40). The way the structure of the company unraveled is summarized in
Figure 1.1, where an inverted pyramid paints a picture to the prime forward-halting stand in the
company. Before moving anywhere I had to understand the family structure, including myself in
this organization, since there was no denying that as whole we had relationships outside of the
work context. This revelation set the stage for the environment I was going to work in. Being
able to understand my client’s strengths, their company culture, and their relationship will allow
me to design a structure of collaboration, interaction, and forward momentum.
FAMILY THEORY
Father & Son with the same
personality face a culture clash
Organizational culture
clash causes mixed signals
and miscommunications
Miscommunications
stem from familial
temporal blindness
Temporal
blindness
prevent from
moving
forward
Figure
1.1:
Overview
of
how
an
organizational
understanding
leads
to
more
focused
relationships
and
partnership.
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FAMILY THEORY
For the average person a family relationship is an aspect of life the majority of us are
born into. Many do not think about the dynamics of the relationship or do not like to think about
it. As humans it is in our innate biology to continue the cycle of life; from birth we are raised by
our parents/guardians based on how they were raised and we go to explore our own relationships,
having children of our own and raising them just as we were raised. This concept gets in the way
of seeing how where we came from has driven who we are and where we are going. Now, think
of this in relation to Ashraf and Eslam, their company is not just an organization it is a family
business. Which means how they interact as father and son is how they will interact as business
partners. The goal of understanding the family dynamics of their relationship is to see where the
miscommunication comes from. This gives the potential to work the relationship into a business
partnership while still maintaining individuality and a family dynamic. So the question is, how
has the family dynamic caused a shield from forming a working relationship?
The first aspect of a relationship is the degree of individuality of each person and their
degree of togetherness in how they interact. The individuality of each person is based on
boundaries we set for ourselves “that are non-negotiable in a relationship” (Gilbert, 1992, p.13).
On the other hand, togetherness is what allows us to interact with each other for “attachment,
affiliation, and approval” (Gilbert, 1992, p.13). The relationship between Ashraf and Eslam
involves little togetherness, where each one of them is stuck on individuality and an
unwillingness to shift their boundaries. In order to gain togetherness it is not a matter of giving
up their individuality but rather exploring each self in an open relationship to each other (Gilbert,
1992, p.16). However, a strong individuality is deeply rooted in another concept referred to as
differentiation of self.
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To start lets put some of these definitions into laymen’s terms. When a person is involved
in any relationship there are two concepts present. As previously stated, the person either has
high individuality, more of their basic self involved or they allow themselves to get involved in
the other person’s self, loosing their own basic self. This directly correlates to how differentiated
or undifferentiated a person is. Someone who is highly differentiated has more “basic self and
less tendency for attachment of self to others” (Gilbert 1992, p. 18). In contrast, an
undifferentiated individual is more emotionally driven with little of their self-involved. As can be
seen from Figure 1.2 an individual with higher differentiation has higher individuality and thus
sees no need for togetherness. The opposite is conducive of a low level differentiated individual,
who seeks more togetherness. Based on Ashraf and Eslam’s leadership styles they are on
different sides of the scale. Where Ashraf is highly differentiated and Eslam is at the lower end
of the scale. The goal is to balance out this relationship; suggestions would be to give Eslam
more responsibility in decision-
making processes and for Ashraf to
take others emotions into
consideration. If the relationship is
not balanced they will “get stuck on
differentiation and polarize, where
Figure
1.2:
A
description
of
the
difference
between
a
highly
differentiated
individual
versus
one
who
has
a
lower
differentiation.
Ashraf
is
on
the
higher
end
of
the
scale
while
Eslam
is
on
the
lower
end.
(Gilbert,
1992,
p.
25)
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each one is categorized into a stereotype” based on their actions and personality (Oshry, 2007,
p.144).
The suggestions mentioned above to balance the relationship are based on how much
each person in the relationship is functioning. When an individual in a relationship is over-
functioning they get are wired to constantly “give advice, do things for others or instead of
others, they talk more than they listen, and have frequent burnouts” (Gilbert, 1992, p.67). An
person that under-functions is usually stuck on “asking for help and not thinking independently,
they listen more than talk, have no set goals, and fail to achieve their goals” (Gilbert, 1992,
p.68). If Ashraf is over-functioning in the relationship, then he is in control. So he would have to
let go some of his responsibility to Eslam to allow him to become more differentiated. This
balances the individuality of each of them and allows for togetherness.
The last task to tackle in terms of family structures was how my involvement can affect
the family business/partnership dynamic. If you can imagine in your head what a triangle looks
like, focusing on each point of that triangle and associating it with an individual, those
individuals being Ashraf, Eslam, and Omneya. It should look
like figure 1.3. In a relationship of three a triangle forms
when “anxiety rises between two people and they turn to a
third person to include in the situation” (Gilbert, 1992, p. 73-
80). In this relationship the
outsider is myself, where I
am looked to as the
problem solver, the go to
person for complaints, and the confidant who they can vent to about each
other. The key to manage the triangle is to recognize one has formed, to
identify what your position is in the triangle, and finally learn how to shift the triangle (Gilbert,
Ashraf
Eslam
Omneya
Figure
1.3:
Portrayal
of
a
triangle
between
three
individuals.
Square
=
outsider
triangled
into
the
relationship
between
the
two
circles
(Gilbert,
1992,
p.
75).
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1992, 79). In order to achieve an equal triangle, there should be open communication without
favoritism towards Ashraf or Eslam. When that is established neither Ashraf nor Eslam will seek
me out but talk to each other.
Now that there is a solid understanding and foundation of the individuals I will be
working with it is time to get the various strengths, weaknesses, leadership styles, cultures, and
family dynamics of this system streamlined. Which means we are ready to enter phase two of
creating a vision and diagnosing the system for contracting and intervention design.
Phase Two: System Diagnosis
At this point in my role as a consultant I have entered the discovery phase, where I have
understood the areas of transformation in the company and the “strengths of my clients” (Block,
2011, p.6). In order to continue in the discovery phase I had to create a meeting where all the
“voices and points of views are heard,” because there was an over-functioning and under-
functioning relationship that needed to be balanced (Block, 2011, p. 266-267). When deciding
what would best benefit my clients moving forward and before looking into other aspects of the
organization, a retracing of my intentions going into the company was explored. The intention
was focused on transforming the company to propel them forward rather than problem solving.
Now, calling your attention to when my first meeting with the company had failed, there was a
long interim period where I observed the company to gather more information about them. Well
we have now arrived to a point in time with the company where we were preparing for our
second meeting, after six weeks of observation had passed.
The goal of the second meeting was to establish a combined vision between Ashraf and
Eslam about their company. This establishes their togetherness as leaders and provides a
common ground for which they can move forward. My approach for the meeting was seen
through the lens of Appreciative Inquiry, AI. Although AI has many definitions, my approach
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will not make sense if I do not define for you how I see AI. AI is a process of patience involving
questioning to bring out the strengths already embedded in an organization. It offers an
opportunity for every voice to be heard and to make meaning out of those voices to formulate a
successful future. AI provides people
in an organization with the chance to
dream; especially during the times
those individuals have forgotten how.
Now pair this formulated definition
with figure 1.4 where this is referred to
as the 4-D cycle, each ‘D’ standing for
discovery, dream, design, and destiny
(Whitney, 2010, p. 6). Through this
approach organizations can discover
their core values and be able to have
unity in how they move forward.
For Ashraf and Eslam we started out at discovery before our second meeting. This phase
is accomplished with appreciative interviews. I set up to meet with each one of them
individually, and to ask them the same questions to see if they have a shared vision about the
future. As simple as it may seem it was not, a key to AI is the ability to formulate appreciative
questions with powerful words that bring to the light the best of the person, their colleagues, and
their organization (Whitney, 2010, p. 19). Some of the questions asked pertained to their core
values, their leadership at work, and when they have felt successful. Other questions dug deeper
into their visions of the future, what are three wishes they had, and what are the strengths of their
employees. The interviews were successful in formulating answers that were streamlined with
the same vision. The gathered information gave insight to a future consisting of an increase in
Figure
1.4:
The
4-‐D
cycle
explains
how
through
Appreciative
Inquiry
an
organization
can
go
through
this
cycle
to
discovery
their
positive
core
and
push
for
action.
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advertising, specifically on a billboard. In addition, there was a need for more experienced
employees to keep up with the incoming workload. My mission after the interview was to
observe what was happening in the company and if the current performance is helping to get
them closer to their goal. I realized that both are constantly busy, they do not invest time in the
management of the company. This was evident when it took over a week to sit them down for a
second meeting, to present the data.
When it was time to meet for our second meeting, I was more prepared and ready to
follow the agenda portrayed in figure 1.5. This showed Ashraf and Eslam exactly what we would
be discussing and the preconceived goals of the meeting. In organizing how I was going to
combine both consulting and AI techniques, I chose to use the dream phase from the 4-D cycle.
The dream phase consists of
allowing the participants to
“envision the future of the
organization, by discussing what
was learned through discovery”
(Whitney, 2010, p. 177). As the
meeting began the data collected
from interviews and MBTI’s was
presented. After which a discussion
was facilitated between them about the information. They listened to how I presented the
information and asked questions about what certain relationships meant. The whole meeting was
not set-up on all AI techniques, so some space was given to express frustrations and to start the
route of communication between Ashraf and Eslam. A lot of constructive criticism was shared
that prepared them for their individual group activity.
Figure
1.5:
The
entrance
to
the
meeting
portrayed
the
results
of
their
interviews
as
well
as
an
agenda
to
show
goals
we
would
accomplish
before
we
close
off.
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Both Ashraf and Eslam, on their own, were given 30 minutes to draw out their future
billboard ad. I watched how each took on the task, their enthusiasm and their motivation for the
project. The activity was intended to allow them to expand on their images and “view their
organization in a larger context” (Whitney, 2010, p.179). After the time was up a discussion was
facilitated on the similarities of their ads. It is important for the individuals in the dream to
clarify their collective images, this enables all the voices to be heard and conclude what is at the
heart of the matter (Whitney, 2010, p. 19, 187). The conversation started out about the ads but
eventually the real set backs arose. Ashraf and Eslam concluded they needed more reliable
employees, needed to communicate more, and allow more time for the management of the
business. Theses actions were needed to accomplish the billboard vision and were set into
smaller achievable goals. The next two steps for the organization were to have biweekly
meetings to update each other and to work on hiring more reliable employees.
Now as a reader, pride and joy of the success has gotten to you. Yet not so fast, Ashraf
and Eslam have decided to make small changes but we are creatures of habit. If we cannot stand
behind what we have put forth then it will not get accomplished. Those biweekly meetings
eventually stopped and miscommunication put us at square one once again. This meant further
diagnosis of the company and new approaches to getting them involved was needed.
LEADERSHIP AND SELF-DECEPTION
So far in dealing with Ashraf Ayoub’s construction company, we know they needed help
transforming their company and themselves to become better managers, which was diagnosed
through their leadership styles, family dynamics, and AI interviews. However these diagnoses
suddenly seemed elementary to what I currently discovered in Leadership and Self-Deception
(Arbinger Institute, 2000) and Covert Processes. Streamlining the same thought from the
introduction, we are going to dive into the organization once again with two new lenses to
develop a new way in aiding them.
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Let’s start with the definition of self-deception; it is the “inability to see that one has a
problem” (Arbinger Institute, 2000). It is the same as being in denial and seeing a distorted
reality. Ashraf Ayoub’s company sees what is holding them back, in terms of management,
organization, communication, and so on. However, the self-deception occurs in differences of
personalities and “righteously done to” conversations (Oshry, 2007, p. 124). I did not realize that
they themselves have the self-deception “germ” in their company. This problem is killing their
productivity and even how they interact with each other.
The way to solve self-deception is to assess feelings of betrayal, to understand those
times when we “have done an action contrary to what we were feeling” (Arbinger Institute,
2000, p. 67). Ashraf Ayoub does not see Eslam or employees as people, he sees them as objects
under his command, which is evident from the culture presented in Table 1.2. He has a very
strong-minded personality and even when he is wrong, he is right. Nothing is done unless he
orders it and his employees are just puppets. I understand that construction is a tough job and
requires a little power and girth to be able to manage the market. Yet, this method can be
approached in two ways, either in or out of the box. When I say in or out of the box I am
referring to the position from which an individual approaches a confrontation, conversation, or
any situation in fact. Approaching someone while being in the box causes disconnection, allows
you to take things personally, feel “righteous indignation, and lose partnerships with people”, all
of which are referred to as “entering the side show” (Oshry, 2007, p.25). If Ashraf Ayoub would
get out of his box to see his employees and customers, he interacts with, as people; his off
putting demeanor will change.
Currently being in the box, a cycle as been created where he sees his employees as
incompetent, he yells, he disapproves of what they do and it only perpetuates the problem. As
stated in Leadership and Self-Deception, Kate saw that she needed her son to be a problem in
order to feel justified in always seeing him as a problem. So, making his employees feel worse
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and de-motivated continues the cycle of allowing him to justify his actions and feelings towards
them. This is exactly the gap between him and Eslam.
When I first approached Ashraf and Eslam in the AI interviews, they had a shared vision
for their company. As the first intervention progressed, they were motivated at the beginning,
meetings were held every week to communicate and a schedule was set up. Currently, I see a
lack of that repeating cycle, a miscommunication. This is self-betrayal from both the father and
the son. Ashraf engages in self-betrayal every time he denies himself the chance to believe in his
son’s capabilities. Which perpetuates the problem of him over-functioning and not allowing
Eslam room to make decisions. This places him in a box of being superior and the only one that
is right. So in reality he is starting to “see the world in a self-justifying way, distorting his
reality” (Arbinger Institute, 2002, p. 77). Thus, thoughts of his accomplishments and capabilities
grow, while diminishing the attributes of his son. Now it has become characteristic of him to
constantly act that way, even if a job was done right by Eslam, one aspect is still wrong. Thus, he
never gets out of the box as he places his son in the box, meaning both start to takes things
personally and make self-justifying realities.
The question is whether Eslam is in the box because of his father, or because of another
factor? It could be both! Eslam was in the box because his father kept undermining his opinion
and capabilities. Instead of working to his full potential it is evident there is no motivation to
work or to make progress, thus constantly under-functioning. Owning a business requires more
work and thought than being an employee in a company. The owner has more responsibilities in
everything, which is the missing link for Eslam. He approaches the company in the box instead
of being out of it. If he were out of the box he would feel that the company was his own, he
would want to take charge, but every time there is a way out he is placed right back into it. He
justifies his actions by stating his opinion is not needed anyways, what is the point; Ashraf
always does what he wants, and so on. In addition to excuses, he runs away from work. Instead
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of writing estimates on weekends, Eslam goes to play basketball, he runs unwanted errands, and
in the end just wastes time. He constantly places himself deeper within the box by not believing
in himself and his capabilities.
All this is great but how it relates to their company is crucial. In the process of
developing the self-betrayal cycle, a lot of tension was built, not just at work but at home as well.
The tensions caused by being constantly in the box for both of them, causes stress. This in itself
is the “germ” in their company. The self-deception in their company is when they both do not see
that their relationship is lacking. Both think that as long as work is being finished and things run
smoothly everything is okay, on the contrary, far from it. So how can this be solved, or even,
how do you tell a person they have a problem? It is guaranteed to receive resistance or the very
least distrust from the client towards their consultant. Yet, the only way to bypass such feelings
is to have an open line of communication and show the client how much you want to help their
company.
At this point it is clear that a lot of the self-deception in the company is embedded in the
family dynamics uncovered earlier where Ashraf and Eslam have not found the balance between
their over/under-functioning relationship and their degree of differentiation. Now how does this
look in a bigger context involving the other employees in the organization?
COVERT PROCESSES
When entering to explore the covert processes, keep in mind the previous dynamics of
culture, family, and self-deception and how through that the company “agendas” have been
categorized as under of above the table. In the next few paragraphs any reference to above the
table means topics that are openly expressed throughout the organization and under the able are
aspects that are never mentioned or up for discussion. Now without realizing it, the organization
has been developing many covert processes over the years. These processes are the “hidden or
unconscious dynamics” in the system (Marshak, 2006, p. 1). Sometimes these covert processes
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may never be seen if the organization is in denial about a problem. However, for Ashraf Ayoub’s
company they wanted to transform, to keep their mission statement much alive, to be efficient as
they promise. Since they have some hidden agendas and lack management they usually are not
so efficient. The framework for the covert processes in the organization was uncovered from the
six dimensions in organizational change. The six dimensions involve: reasons, politics,
inspirations, emotions, mindsets, and psychodynamics (Marshak, 2006, p. 5). With such a
framework laid down, it was clear to see what was on the table versus under the table for the
organization.
Three dimensions that overlapped were reasons, politics, and inspirations. According to
Marshak, organizations operate through politics and rational, assuming this practice leaves no
room for feelings or unwanted business in the organization (Marshak, 2006, p. 7-12). In the case
of the construction company, the politics of the work to be strong, feared, and know the market,
ruins the rational management of how to run a business. One of the reasons being, Ashraf
Ayoub’s company is stuck on the ideal of what a construction worker should be, rather than what
a construction company and successful business should look like. The mentality stems from the
stereotype of how construction worker’s are, as well as, temporal blindness of how the past work
culture Ashraf used to work in affects him now (Oshry, 2007, p.xvii). This type of thinking,
leads to the same streamlined thought, that talk of a vision or inspiration is considered soft. The
entire company and employees work to achieve something greater, however, it is never
mentioned or outlined. Such an environment can lead to de-motivated employees and decreased
work ethic. Counter to what was stated working with inspiration leads to “people willing to work
towards strongly held values and aspirations, despite rational logic” (Marshak, 2006, p. 8). In
addition to the politics comes a second layer of discovery, emotions in a system.
Talk of emotions in a system turns on many red lights for individuals. The fear of
emotional expression in an organization is a covert process in itself. In the current organization,
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emotions about mistakes made at work are expressed, which portrays a negative view of
emotions. For example, when employees at work cut a certain door or piece of wood wrong, it
costs money. Ashraf yells at these employees and scolds them in front of other employees. This
causes employees to lose their ability to communicate to him when they have made a mistake.
As an outside observer, the mindset of Ashraf Ayoub is not growing with his business. It is hard
to change his ways because he experienced this type of treatment as an employee in Egypt. He
was taught to be tough, street smart, and to instill such a strong mentality in his employees. Yet
he came to the US, the dynamic of his environment has changed, the culture has changed, and
the employees have different mindsets than what he knows.
However, there is a resolution to allow such a revelation to surface. First it involves
managing myself to be able to manage the system I am in to achieve better results together.
According to Marshak, in order to properly explore covert processes, one must create a trusting
dynamic, “seek movement not exposure”, and to look at myself first (Marshak, 2006, p. 69).
On
the
Table
Under
the
Table
My
Stance
Figure
1.6:
A
portrayal
of
what
is
under
the
table
and
what
is
above
the
table
for
Ashraf
Ayoub
General
Contracting
LLC.
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I have found what works for my organization is to ask rhetorical questions, they are not direct,
do not require a specific answer, and even as a question places an unexplored idea as a topic of
discussion. Currently, none of the discovered covert processes have been shared with the
organization because they are still being defined and will be explained shortly, referring to figure
1.6.
The first task was to uncover some of the ongoing patterns in the organization. Ashraf
Ayoub showed an individual pattern, where his behavior is the cause of different covert
processes (Marshak, 2006, p. 37). This individual pattern causes many of the covert processes
under the table for the organization. He has a fear of change for his organization, which comes
off to the employees as unwillingness to share where they are headed. Also under the table is
disorganization, with papers, supplies, storage shed, and home office. Now this may seem as a
small individual pattern but it has become a problem where other employees do not care to be
organized either. This is coercion, where Ashraf is in the box about his own disorganization,
leading to employees following in their leaders path (Arbinger Institute, 2000, p.160). Different
from before, is what’s on the table, a reoccurring pattern is yelling to employees, which can only
be balanced with Eslam’s leadership style. This is obvious in everyday work and even obvious
between him and his son. Now the yelling at employees may be for valid reasons at times, and
it’s okay for such an emotion to be on the table, instead of it being a shock when it does occur.
However, managing how to deal with these situations is important because it has become a habit.
According to Marshak, there is a second pattern to identify covert processes, and it is
interpersonal patterns. This implies a behavior frequently happening between the same two
people (Marshak, 2006, p. 37). These same two individuals would be Ashraf and Eslam. For
them, constant bickering is on the table and frustrations are under the table. They have to find a
common ground of communication because this causes tension in their work or even a resistance
to work with each other. The misunderstanding of each other also does not allow for each of
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them to see the future but focus and act based upon past events, a behavior called transference
(Marshak, 2006, p. 50).
The organization has been undergoing many small steps over the past two months, in
terms of communication and efficient management. All it takes is to stop misjudging one another
in the organization and be able to recognize when our actions have caused us to fall out of
partnership. After this final diagnosis of the company, Ashraf and Eslam were ready for
contracting.
Phase Three: Contracting
This last phase of the process, contracting, was placed on hold for a bit in time because
my role as a consultant changed to being a coach. As will be revealed in the intervention, a shift
in the company caused Eslam to leave and find a job of his own, in the mechanical engineering
industry. My job was no longer tasked on untangling their relationship but to coach Ashraf on
better management/leadership skills. Based on the shift the contract was written to continue a
new phase of the intervention.
During the first half of the intervention, no contract was written since all that was needed
was facilitation of conversations to balance relationships and establish partnership between
Ashraf and Eslam. However, as a coach, my role was different. I became a motivator, teacher,
change catalysts, and collaborator. The contract written, figure 1.7, was intended to transform a
leader and his company into a self-managed/ sustainable corporation. The contract addressed my
needs from my client and in return I provided the services I will be aiding in. A meeting was
scheduled to explain the contract and clarify any questions or suggestions to adjust the contract.
Figure 1.7 explains the final contract and portrays how the intervention will address these goals
and the insights from diagnosing the company.
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Figure
1.7:
The
final
contract
between
Ashraf
and
I
after
the
company
lost
Eslam
as
an
Employee.
My
role
has
changed
to
coaching
Ashraf.
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Goals For Change
Entering into the company of Ashraf Ayoub General Contracting LLC there was an
intention around a sustainable transformation. Taking this into account I wanted Ashraf and his
employees throughout the process to envision themselves becoming a bigger corporation. My
goal was to assess the vision and “how well it served the interests of the customers, stakeholders,
employees – and how it easily can be translated into a realistic competitive strategy” (Kotter,
2001, p. 5). Streamlining that thought, I envision an intervention where Ashraf learns how to
become a better leader and even better manager of his company. This would involve him
becoming more organized; relay schedules more efficiently, design company meetings, and
develop better communication with his employees. This does not change the company but only
“brings forth their existing strengths, hopes, and dreams – and amplifies their positive core”
(Whitney, 2010, p.15).
When these leadership and management foundations are laid down, it will open a door
for forward momentum, one that involves increasing customer satisfaction and clientele. In
addition, I hope to see an increase in advertising, specifically the billboard they one day wish to
have their company name on. If these aspects are successful, the desire is to have the company
increase their revenue by two-fold. This will allow them a cushion to buy an outside office for
the company with a showroom for their products and samples. An increase in revenue opens
opportunities for employment and the formation of a dynamic work environment, instead of
solely a Top – Down organization.
What I would like to leave the company with is a sustainability binder. The binder would
include charts for tracking current inventory over a six months period. Also included would be
new employee profiles with their personal information and assessment questions. The binder is
meant to be a reference for the company moving forward in learning how to design meetings,
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post on Facebook, problem solve, and contacts in the construction business. This gives
management a cushion where the majority of tasks are organized and easy to access, since time
is a deterrent to how well management works now.
Key Performance Indicators
Up until now there has been a lot of mention of what Ashraf’s construction company
should look like. Yet, how are we going to measure such a success? Our two modes of
measurement will be quantitatively and qualitatively. One measure will be based around
numbers, quantitatively, and the later will be based on behaviors, qualitatively. When referring to
table 1.3 it portrays the parameters that were noticed during the diagnosis process that will be
either improved or not changed throughout the intervention process.
Key Performance Indicators
Qualitative
Key Performance
Indicators
Before
Intervention
During Intervention End Result
Openness to Ideas 1
"
"
5
1
"
"
"
5 1
" " "
5
Respect
1
"
"
5 1
"
"
5 1
" " "
5
Dealing with Change 1
"
5 1
"
"
5 1
" " " "
5
Collaboration 1
"
5 1
"
"
"
5 1
" " " "5
Communication 1
"
5 1
"
"
" 5 1
" " "
5
Quantitative
Key Performance
Indicators
Before
Intervention
During Intervention End Result
Facebook Likes 34 51 146
Number of Employees 3 4 4
Clientele Yearly 80: 2014 25: 2015 so far 25
Clientele during winter 10 17 17
Flipping Houses 1 house/ year 1 house/ year 4 houses/ year
Revenue 345,000 (2013) 585,000 (2014) 585,000
Company Vehicles 2 vehicles 3 vehicles 3 vehicles
Table
1.3:
The
above
table
portrays
the
parameters
to
our
key
performance
indicators
during
the
intervention
process
and
at
the
end
of
the
process.
Keep
in
mind
“before
intervention”
refers
to
the
previous
year
before
I
met
with
Ashraf
in
September
2014.
Qualitative:
1
=
Not
at
All
and
5=
Very
High
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Goals for Managing Myself in My Role
In any organization it is essential to understand oneself in terms of strengths, values, and
even weaknesses to truly use self as an agent of change. Throughout my time with the company
there was consistent growth that I saw in myself, however, before that growth came hardships
and discovery. To begin, let us recap my current role in the organization and how managing
myself aided in the organization’s growth. As previously stated, throughout this process I was
working with both my father and brother, yet, it was easy to establish a working relationship with
them. What was not easy was assessing their personalities and how I would manage myself due
to our differences. If referring back to table 1.1, it shows how we think differently but at the
same time how I have learned to manage our differences. This table could have not been
formulated if I was not self-aware. According to the NTL article, developing self-awareness is
hard at first but once achieved an individual gains access to many aspects of a situation (Self
2006). An individual learns how to look at others actions, are they frustrated, comfortable, are
they interested in the conversation or not.
Going back in time, before I even contracted with Ashraf’s company a lot of self-
development was explored. I learned my own strengths in terms of using my emotions to
understand others, using my sense of organization to manage my priorities, and the ability to
synthesize massive amounts of information quickly. More importantly, was learning how to
expand my areas of improvement. It takes more than acknowledging that we are not perfect to
really change. We have to work everyday to become a better version of who we were yesterday.
When assessing myself I realized I had to be more assertive, instead of being reluctant to intrude
on others and keeping to myself. Additionally, was being able to develop skills that will allow
me to be more open and not single-minded about my own beliefs and ideas. Knowing these
insights allowed me to tap into my potential even more.
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To shed more light on my areas of improvement I combined both my strengths and
potential areas of progress in the “Self-In-System Sensitizer”. This sensitizer allows individuals
to see their polarities, in other words, traits they are strong in versus ones that need improvement
(Power & Systems, 1978, p.3). In doing so I was able to use the results of my MBTI to focus on
becoming more flexible about my polarities. As shown in Figure 1.8, I evaluated what are my
strength verses my weakness and formulated a medium of my polarities. Based on this, I grew as
an individual because I was not defensive about how stuck I was in my ways. Becoming more
flexible allowed me to see the special opportunities in each new situation I faced (Power &
Figure
1.8:
The first section in Green indicates traits that I am consistently high on. The latter section in Red
shows traits that are not prominent. The last section in Blue show how I have learned to manage my polarities,
portraying both my strengths and potential areas of growth.
Innocence Loose Submissive Inclusive Giving Under-
Structuring
Participate Calm
Political Tight Rebellion Individual Withhold Over-
Structuring
Observe Stir
Innocence Loose Submissive Inclusive Giving Under-
Structuring
Participate Calm
Political Tight Rebellion Individual Withhold Over-
Structuring
Observe Stir
Innocence Loose Submissive Inclusive Giving
Under-
Structuring Participate Calm
Political Tight Rebellion Individual Withhold Over-
Structuring
Observe Stir
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Systems, 1978, p.31). As a leader, self-discovery was the key to retaining my authenticity and
developing my own leadership stance.
To start, managing my authenticity encompassed three areas I would have to be aware of,
they are: knowing my origins, knowing others better, and being able to connect with my
organization (Goffee, 2005, p.3). According to Block’s ‘Flawless Consulting’, knowing who you
are and staying true to yourself lends itself to “authentic behaviors that lead to higher trust,
leverage, and client commitment” (Block, 2011, p. 38). Doing so was not a challenge with a
leadership stance already in mind. To accomplish the tasks I had to step out of my comfort zone,
accept constructive criticism, and tune into the “people, places, and events that shaped me”
(Goffee, 2005, p.3). With that came understanding others and connecting with what was
important to them. The leadership stance I set for myself to stay in tune with my clients and stay
on track for their intervention is as follows: “I am caring and aware of other’s action. I consider
other’s ideas and allow the space to give feedback. I bring a world of possibility with my
creativity and imagination. I provide a nurturing environment that promotes growth and sharing
of ideas. At the heart of my leadership stands integrity as a roadmap to success”. With such a
leadership stance I will be able to hold both my clients and myself accountable for our actions,
allowing for a “better understanding of their world and more empathy towards them” (Oshery,
2007, p. 16-25). Allowing room for this empathy is what allows me to stay out of the sideshow,
which was stated before as taking situations personally only propelling a problem to become
worse.
Since I was able to gather my insights and stay true to myself I now knew how to
communicate with my clients. This whole experience was not only about me but also those who I
interact with and intentionally want to impact their lives. An aspect that was beneficial in my
organization was the article on Narcisstic Leaders. During my intervention process I was able to
see that Ashraf was “good at converting people to their point of view” (Maccoby, 2004, p.8).
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Since I was aware of this I was able to empathize and realize that I would not be receiving any in
return. However I was okay with that because his viewpoint of converting others point of view
comes from his fear of change and his habitual leadership. When creating the intervention of
alleviating the fear of change, I helped come up with what goals we would like to accomplish. In
this sense, I was not given the credit but I was okay with this where I said to myself ‘if I can
empower others to achieve goals that are parallel with what I see, then I have done my job right’.
Although I have proposed a coaching intervention with the client I knew it would be
challenging. How do I talk to my own dad about his emotions at work without him looking at me
like I have three heads? Simple, you do not let them know you are. My approach to this is
knowing, through his leadership type, he only listens to information he seeks and does not like
criticism; I had to have him come up with the problems (Maccoby, 2004, p.5). I call them
“protocols” on how to problem solve at work, rather than changing how he treats problems. With
this in mind, we talked situations out, how he solved them before, why it did not work, and what
he wants the outcome to be. In this manner, Ashraf talked about how he felt in those situations
without me saying a word about “emotions”.
Even though I have been able to figure out more about my client, I also worked on how I
come off as the consultant. I have learned from previous experiences that my burnout rate is
high. I quickly invest and suddenly crash with new projects. So this bad habit is what is called
“being the hero who becomes addicted to success fairly early in the process” (Butler, 2001,
p.92). For myself I have begun to recognize signs of overload and how it makes me feel. I am
now able to feel when my work ethic is starting to slack and tell myself to pause to re-ground
myself (Butler, 2001, p.92). Since I have been able to achieve this, my client is not stressed out
about the changes being made in his company. In order to help both of us I have made a timeline
of events and meetings so it can be a gradual process rather than setting a fire hose of change on
him.
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CHAPTER 2: Methodology & Intervention Design
Up until now there has been thorough analysis of Ashraf’s company, the goals in mind
for them, and how managing myself will aid in their transformation. However, we have yet to
mention how? How and by what methods will we put Ashraf’s thoughts into action and help in
their transformation? The answer to this will come later but first the reader must understand the
context from which the company has shifted when we began our intervention together. As
previously mentioned, Ashraf and Eslam had many family dynamics that needed resolutions. The
family dynamic was the goal of the first intervention because without the proper conversations
there would have not been collaboration during the process. To summarize and to be explained
later on, due to this first intervention Eslam left the company and my intervention changed. The
goal was no longer to untangle family dynamics but rather coach Ashraf to become a better
manager/ leader in his company. This splits the intervention into two phases: phase one
describing fierce conversations and phase two encompassing coaching meetings.
Phase One: Family Dynamics
LAYING FOUNDATIONS
Before jumping into an intervention as a consultant I needed to assess “how those around
me will engage in the change” or if those individuals are ready for change (Dezieck, 2010, p.1).
To start my intervention I took a step back and looked at the bigger picture. Looking at the
bigger picture for my organization worked like a funnel. Imaging a funnel, it begins with a large
open circle and continuously gets narrow; my intervention began with looking at my consultant-
client interaction and narrowed down to having productive conversations with my clients.
The overall look at my intervention began with following the guidelines of the NTL
Institute OD map. This map portrays the whole consultation process and provided me with a
framework to follow if I ever got off track. As shown in figure 1.9a, I was at action planning
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where I needed to find the opportunities to introduce action plans with my clients. Using this as a
guideline the funnel narrowed and I noticed Ashraf and Eslam were currently in denial about
their miscommunication. Being in denial created anger, resistance, and frustrations to Ashraf and
Eslam when first introduced to change.
Figure
1.9a:
The
figure
provides
a
framework
for
the
phases
in
consulting
between
the
consultant
and
the
client.
This
is
a
simple
tool
to
assess
progress
of
an
intervention.
Figure
1.9b:
By
following
the
OD
map
the
system
experiences
different
stages
of
change.
By
comparing
both
models
together
it
helps
to
see
if
moving
forward
is
the
right
action
or
more
diagnosis
is
warranted.
Darwin, J., Johnson,
P. and McAuley, J. (2001) Creating Strategies for Change
London:Pearson
A
B
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Janssen’s four-room apartment model for change proposes that there are stages for which
individuals go through change, figure 1.9b. They begin at contentment and work counter
clockwise towards denial, confusion, and end at renewal (Dezieck, 2010, p 1). Each stage entails
its own concerns and satisfactions. Recognizing that Ashraf and Eslam were in the denial stage
allowed me to better direct my intervention. Both the OD map and the four-room apartment
worked together as a rechecking tool. If I was at action planning but my clients were in denial
could I move forward to action taking or did I have to back track to diagnosis? The decision to
move forward in the denial phase was the key to the intervention. My task funneled down to
facilitating fierce conversations between Ashraf and Eslam to untangle their over-functioning
and under functioning relationship to move them out of the denial room towards renewal, where
new possibilities emerge.
FIERCE CONVERSATIONS
As you have read from the title it may come as a surprise to you that I mention a “fierce”
conversation in an already stressful environment. However the meaning of a fierce conversation
is deeper than the conventional meaning of fierce. Let’s say we have two conversations a normal
transformative conversation and a fierce transformative conversation named X and Y,
respectively. Conversation X focuses on activities but has disengagement; it contains
competition and overwhelming stress about the tasks. Although a conversation as such can result
in positive outcomes, the process by which they happen is chaotic. Taking that same
conversation into a fierce conversation results into a conversation where there is “focus on
results, issues are effective and truthful, there is collaboration and shared enthusiasm, and in the
end strategic success” (Scott, 2002, p.xx-xxi). This was the needed conversation to begin the line
of communication and collaboration between Ashraf and Eslam to reduce the disparity of their
differentiation and in essentially achieve a more flexible over/under-functioning relationship.
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Now that a solid understanding of how effective a fierce conversation can be, I decided to
facilitate one between Ashraf and Eslam. This conversation was the tip of the funnel, which
resulted in the company shift. The design behind the conversation was to establish a safe
environment that will allow an authentic conversation addressing the miscommunications.
Knowing that my clients are very hands on, they are not conceptual, and in order for them to
grasp concepts they need to learn by trial and error. From my perspective, this is tough I know
these two individuals and my approach had to be tactile. Both individuals are very cynical and it
can be hard to get through to them at times. However, a little facilitation of a fierce conversation
while on vacation was my best chance. During this time I realized that both my father and
brother would be relaxed and not thinking about work, so I took on the task of speaking to each
of them separately.
Recall back to when the company was diagnosed with self-deception, they kept falling
into a cyclical pattern of Ashraf dominating a conversation and over-functioning while Eslam
watches from the sideline. One would wish they could understand such concepts, yet, keeping in
mind neither one is familiar with the “in the box” terminology, I had to facilitate the
conversation to getting them out of the box. Getting out of the box is not an observable action, as
stated, it is not a specific behavior (Arbinger Institute, 2002, p. 142). In the box is simply an
imaginary force field around someone, blocking their vision from those around them. Getting out
of the box is as simple as “seeing”, once you see, a light goes on and the person in front of you is
no longer an object, the indifference is gone. During the conversation it required constant
tracking of their thoughts to stay within four parameters, “this is where we’re going, this is why
we’re going there, this is who is going with us, and this is how we’re going to get there (Scott,
2002, p.190). Eventually that invisible film was taken off for Ashraf and Eslam to see each other.
This process started out with Eslam stating he had two new job interviews, in California.
In finally speaking up, I talked out the process with him in order for Eslam to realize how he was
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his own individual and Ashraf is not a massive hurdle but also a person. Since Eslam got out of
the box by realizing his own self-worth and the blame he was posing on his father, a follow the
leader pattern occurred (Arbinger Institute, 2002, p. 160). Soon enough Ashraf saw Eslam as his
own individual with is own ideas and attributes. This perpetuated a mutual conversation where
both were on terms to freely express what was happening in the future of the company. They
were able to have a fierce conversation by staying within the parameters and adjusting their level
of differentiation. Ashraf no longer talked over Eslam but listened and accepted Eslam’s
decisions.
The conversation was effective because I had to manage my own self in terms of being in
or out of the box. I could not ‘talk the talk and not walk the walk’. Just as in Leadership and Self-
Deception, “knowing the material does not get you out of the box living it does” (Arbinger
Institute, 2002, p. 174). With every frustration I had to remind myself how Ashraf and Eslam are
frustrated as well. I was no better than they were, I had no idea what they must be feeling, but
my job was not to try to figure it out or fix it. I needed no justification for my actions because I
did not betray myself. I stayed true to my goals and left room for silence if my clients needed
that space. Following this conversation Ashraf and Eslam wanted to revisit what we had
previously agreed upon during our AI meeting, where we established their two goals of hiring
more employees and biweekly meetings to reach their billboard advertisement. So, we worked
together and built a tree!
THE DECISION TREE
The decision tree is made to symbolize a decision making process for an organization.
The tree symbolizes an organization, where each level of the tree is synonymous to different
decisions based on the individuals in the organization. The different decision levels of the tree
are leaf, branch, trunk, and root decisions. This tree was the perfect example to use with my
clients because it was visually appealing. They could draw the tree out themselves and fill in the
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Make
Decision.
Act
on
it.
Don’t
Report
your
action
Make
Decision.
Act
on
it.
Report
action
you
took
daily,
weekly,
or
monthly
Make
Decision.
Act
on
it.
Report
decision
before
action.
Make
decision
jointly
with
many
people.
Could
cause
harm
if
poorly
made
When
employees
are
specialized
in
a
specific
part
of
construction.
Decisions
in
projects
are
up
to
them.
This
needs
development
because
there
is
no
report
out
on
decisions.
When
there
is
a
problem
at
work
and
it
will
interfere
with
customer
satisfaction.
Currently
developing
is
better
collaboration
and
communication
between
both
leaders
decisions at the different levels. Since Eslam’s time with the company was ending we had one
last meeting where we used the decision tree to guide our goals.
Before the meeting there were goals that needed to be met in order to have success with
the decision. These goals involve understanding under what “categories decisions and actions
fall under,” allow the decisions to have “room for professional development,” and to develop
leadership from the root upward in the organization (Scott, 2002, p.120). If these goals are met
then decisions eventually will work their way from the root out to the leaves. Figure 1.10
portrays the decision tree, what each level entails, and the results of what Ashraf and Eslam
established as their decision tree at our meeting.
Figure 1.10: The above decision tree shows the results of the last meeting in which both Ashraf and Eslam
attended together. Based on the results they have missing answers for aspects of their tree. These gaps are
where the potential for growth and discovery begins to start a transformative process in organizations. Scott, S.
(2002). Fierce conversations: Achieving success at work & in life, one conversation at a time. New York, NY: Viking.
RESULTS
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By allowing Ashraf and Eslam to see the gaps in their tree it brought to light questions
around, why employees do not make more decisions or even take more responsibility? This
meeting produced a shift from the denial room into the confusion room of the four-room
apartment model. The confusion room brings to light the old way, “makes the new way unclear”,
and begins the thoughts of what’s to come (Dezieck, 2010, p.2-4). As my clients shifted from
denial into confusion, according to figure 1.9a, I could now shift to taking action on my
consulting timeline. These realizations concluded the phase one intervention and Eslam
eventually left the company. My position shifted as a coach for Ashraf, but the results of the first
intervention carried through into phase two.
Phase Two: Leadership Development through Coaching
LAYING FOUNDATIONS
As phase two of the intervention began another layer to my role was explored, a
consultant as a coach. Before jumping into a new intervention it was back to the drawing board
looking at the bigger picture and understanding the scope of the new design. With coaching
comes many approaches and styles to create the space for a coaching conversation. A coaching
conversation is one that encompasses deep listening to the individual in front of you, witnessing
of your emotions and theirs, a conversation where you empower your coachee, and push towards
action to move forward. When thinking of coaching it may seem simple because coaches have
been defined in many areas ranging from sports, to hospitalists, and even health. However as a
consultant, my coachee does not like change and more than change is talking about his emotions.
Gathering information from my diagnosis I knew Ashraf needed to be addressed indirectly about
his emotions. So, I took a coaching stance where I assigned myself specific roles and goals as a
coach. These goals were to be present during our meetings, “take ownership of my projections”,
refrain from solving problems, ask “high-gain questions” to bring to light abilities already in my
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client, and to actively listen (Lask, 2008, p.1-3). After establishing my take as a coach I asked
Ashraf to have a meeting that was designed to be a coaching session.
COACHING MEETINGS
Before the meeting, I asked Ashraf to monitor his surroundings at work for two weeks
and to notice situations that reoccur. These reoccurrences can either be situations he tried solving
in the past and happened again or they could be situations that Ashraf did not have resolutions
for. Knowing where I was as a consultant I needed to plan for action as a coach. Planning for
action consisted of two models one being a checklist based on Block’s Flawless Consulting and
the second was using the ladder of inference. The checklist was simple, it was meant to combat
resistance from the client. Resistance only “suggests you are on target and you are dealing with
something that’s important to the client” and that only meant I would have to move towards the
resistance rather than run away from it (Block, 2011, p. 242). The checklist in figure 1.11
summarizes the guidelines I used to prepare for my meeting; even if some are not addressed
being aware of these questions will only help develop my conversation with Ashraf.
In addition to the checklist was the
ladder of inference. The ladder of
inference allows individuals to draw better
conclusions based on reality, rather than
their assumptions. Being able to draw
conclusions in this manner allows you to
Meeting
For
Action
Checklist
What
do
you
want
from
the
meeting?
Think
of
where
you
are
likely
to
get
resistance
in
the
meeting?
How
can
you
ask
for
feedback
on
how
this
consultation
is
going?
How
will
you
introduce
the
ladder
of
inference?
Figure
1.11:
The
checklist
developed
by
Peter
Block
is
a
guideline
for
a
consultant
to
use
to
plan
for
a
meeting
especially
when
they
sense
resistance
from
client.
(Block,
2011,
p.
245-‐246).
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remain objective, deal with challenging people, and have a clear sense of your actions. The
ladder model, figure 1.12, was the tool used during the meeting with Ashraf. It assisted in being
able to view how his work reoccurrences
were not being solved because his ladder
of inference did not shift. Ashraf came to
the meeting with his homework finished.
There were three situations he wanted to
work through, customers terminating their
contracts early, employee misconduct, and
customer confusion with county permits.
We restated our contract terms and what
he had accomplished so far, after which
we addressed each of the issues. Using
coaching techniques in asking powerful
discovery questions to guide him through the ladder of inference, Ashraf was able to develop his
own solutions. As can be seen this is was not only a coaching session but also a fierce
conversation that brought results and pushed for action (Scott, 2002, p. 163). This conversation
was indirect, it did not ask of Ashraf to speak of his emotions, but essentially that is what
occurred. He had to assess why he dealt with previous problems in a certain manner and why he
wanted them to change now.
Since this was not the first intervention, I had to bring back the important realizations
Ashraf had during the previous meeting. Majority of the realizations revolved around employee
involvement and one of his concerns was employee conduct. Putting this together we
collaborated and developed an employee conduct form that addressed his hopes from his
employees and any disciplinary actions that will be taken if employees endanger themselves or
Figure
1.12:
The
figure
portrays
how
quick
we
can
climb
up
the
ladder
of
inference
when
presented
with
challenging
data.
It
is
a
tool
used
to
track
thoughts
and
better
asses
how
to
deal
with
actions
in
the
future
in
a
more
effective
manner.
Developed by Chris
Argyris, then popularized in The Fifth Discipline Fieldbook (1994) by
Peter M. Senge and others.
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others at work. Not only did this prepare him for future occurrences but it allows him a cushion
of ground rules for hiring new employees, a goal set from the AI meeting. So how does this fit in
our transformative process of Ashraf’s company, as stated the focus was no longer a family
dynamic but geared towards leadership development. From the diagnosis this intervention
eliminates the under the table covert processes of confusion and disorganization. Facilitating a
conversation where Ashraf can work through the confusion helped to detangle the
disorganization and created a clearer path moving forward.
RAISING COVERT PROCESSES THROUGH MEETING DESIGN
So far in our discussion we have covered personality traits, to family dynamics, and even
uncovering some covert processes. The following is designed to bring to light the remaining
covert process in terms of expanding Ashraf’s corporation and his fear of change. If you
remember back to when the first meeting with Ashraf failed and every meeting since have been
productive, the reasoning was meeting design. Meeting design allowed me to use my both my
creative and organization skills to have a greater impact on my client’s organization. I decided to
teach Ashraf about meeting design through a coaching meeting.
The meeting with Ashraf had three design goals: paraphrasing, tracking, and establishing
common ground. The reason why organized meetings are successful is that they have a purpose,
a clear outline, and take into consideration possible red flags one can face in a meeting. For the
meeting with Ashraf paraphrasing would require active listening, a stance already taken as a
coach. This allows him to know I am listening and understand what he needs (Kaner, 1996, p.
44). In terms of tracking it requires for me to “summarize the discussion, track the different
ideas, and check for accuracy”, a skill that shows the client he is being heard (Kaner, 1996,
p.49). Last, is establishing a common ground by summarizing any differences we have and
developing the foundation to work together (Kaner, 1996, p.61).
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Knowing these parameters would require my attention during the meeting, I had to step
and think about what are the potential results of the meeting. Teaching Ashraf meeting design
was purposed because of two thought lines. The first being Ashraf’s hopes of expanding his
corporation from the home office into a corporate building. Such a transformation is ambitious
but can fail if pursued alone. If Ashraf designed a meeting for his employees to share his vision
with them, they can all work towards a common, and transform his vision into a reality. The
second purpose of introducing meeting design was to tap into Ashraf’s leadership skills. In the
beginning we had discussed how Ashraf’s leadership style was autocratic which leads to a harsh
culture for his employees. By allowing Ashraf to learn meeting design, he gradually taps into his
potential of creating collaborative meetings resulting in a shift from an autocratic culture a
democratic one.
The meeting with Ashraf started with gathering information about past meetings with his
employees and how successful they were. The reality was they rarely had meetings, so his
employees have been in the dark for quite some time. Ashraf directed my attention to how ready
his company was for a meeting with the caliber that I was envisioning and I took his concern into
how we wanted to introduce the new vision to his employees. He decided that we would design a
future meeting for when his employees are ready. He may not use it soon but he knows he has
established a resource handy for himself. Ashraf wanted a meeting that can allow his employees
to think into the future about the present, a meeting where they would collaborate and develop
solutions. Of course we had to predict and think of the red flags in the meeting to guide our
design. We both had many ideas that was starting to lead to divergent thinking, to bring us back
on track we used the Kaner model for make a list, figure 1.13b, this allowed us to “organize our
ideas” and avoid becoming stuck in out mentality (Kaner, 1996, p.88). If you look at Appendix A
you will see the finalized meeting design that resulted. It portrays the future of a productive,
collaborative, and unified company coming together with a common vision.
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SUSTAINABILITY BINDER
Part of my contract with Ashraf is to be able to leave him with the proper resources to
continue what we began; this resulted in the idea of the sustainability binder. The binder contains
five tabs each specific to an area of transformation we developed in the intervention. The tabs are
employee profiles, meeting designs, company protocols, computer how to’s, and contacts in the
construction business. When presenting this to Ashraf in the end it will show how his hard work
and leadership has shined through because he helped develop every part of the binder. When
Ashraf wants new ideas for a meeting he can pull up a design and adjust it to meet his needs. If
he wants to advertise on Facebook, he can follow the typed guidelines. The binder will ease his
fear of change and allow him to be more organized in his ideas and management of important
papers.
A
B
Figure
1.13a:
Diagram
helps
groups
respond
to
times
of
dilemmas
when
they
begin
to
enter
a
divergent-‐thinking
zone
(Kaner,
1996,
p.88).
Figure
1.13b:
Used
to
formulate
the
criteria
for
the
solutions
matrix
in
Appendix
A
(Kaner,
1996,
p.93)
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Summary - The Journey:
The best way to describe the unexpected shift during my time with Ashraf Ayoub
General Contracting LLC is the perfect storm. Before finishing the last part of the meeting
design with Ashraf, he had a family emergency and left the country for almost a month. Now
you might be thinking what happened to his company, well before he left Eslam had ended his
training in California and was back with company. During the time Ashraf was not here, Eslam
was in charge of the whole company on his own. By Ashraf not being in the picture, Eslam
gained the confidence to make his own decisions, to create relationships as a leader to his
employees, and to take on the responsibility he was never given. I could have not planned for a
better resolution to their over-functioning and under-functioning relationship. The tables turned,
Eslam became more differentiated and started over-functioning in his relationship with is father.
Maya Angelou once said, “I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I
do better”. After having experienced the good and the bad of applying while learning, I certainly
know how to better anticipate red flags and be more prepared to better diagnose an organization.
Ashraf’s company made small changes that made a difference in the employee’s everyday
interaction at work. My intervention help show his company that someone was invested in their
success and it only motivated them to become better. The intervention laid down the foundations
that they had been looking for but could not find in the past.
With better organization during the intervention came increased efficiency because time
was no longer wasted trying to organize and gather papers. As a result, there was more time left
to pay attention to management of the company. Managing the company opened the doors of
increased clientele even during the slow season. By making small changes Ashraf’s company
was able to handle how the company was beginning to transform because they no longer fear
change if they have smaller preset goals to achieve.
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CHAPTER 3: Personal Impact of Capstone
Socrates said it best “the only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing”. Assuming I
knew everything before starting my capstone, then I would have not gained the experience I had.
My capstone was a wild roller coaster ride; it was real and embodied the knowledge I would
have not gained by simply reading a book. To learn in class and apply in real-time added to the
richness of my capstone experience. This capstone has made a great impact not only on my life
but also in the lives of Ashraf and Eslam. In essence there was a method to my madness, which
they now both see. I had a purpose and a mission of helping this organization to become better
and to see their full potential. I am proud to say that my mission was fulfilled after both failures
and successes. I was able to establish the majority of what I had intended to accomplish with
Ashraf in the beginning. Although, some aspects have been left for the future, the sustainability
binder left with company, will keep them moving forward for some time.
Reflecting on my goals to manage myself throughout the process, I would say that a lot
of patience and biases were constantly being tested. Working with my family during my
capstone took a lot of self-management but more than that was self-compassion. Where I
realized I am only human. These frustrations and failures was where opportunities of growth and
learning to keep moving forward happen. Throughout this experience I gained the confidence to
believe in my capabilities of making an impact in others lives. Having this realization only
perpetuated my love for a bigger purpose; the bigger purpose being bringing out the best in those
around me.
This gain in knowledge has given me the ability to use the various skills in my toolbox to
solve problems, bring a creative twist to leadership, and to take the time to pause to reflect on my
accomplishments. My capstone has been an enriching learning experience that will be a constant
reminder of how much I can accomplish with the proper mindset and support.
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CHAPTER 4: An Unexpected Gift
I begin this chapter by stating an unexpected gift because that is what I view my ODL
experience as. Entering the program my expectations were minimal because I was not aware of
how much OD can expand my world. Early on in the program I realized the potential need and
importance for OD in the future. My world did not only expand because of the individuals I have
met but also emotionally in being able understand the many dynamics of an organization. I
continuously tapped into my potential with each class I took. If an outside observer were asked
to describe my thoughts and abilities before the OD program it would be as follows; “a student
that is so focused on succeeding that time is not given to others. Her abilities to listen to you are
there, but she is not hearing you because of the many priorities running through her head. She
seeks to help others but can get stuck in situations and not know how to solve them”. Now
viewing myself differently, I know I can listen attentively and use my comforting advice to
create an inviting environment for those around me. I can look at a problem and appreciate the
good things to continue moving forward. I see now how much people can be caught up focusing
on one thing, they do not step back and see the bigger picture. These skills are what I intend to
use to become a catalyst of change.
With new ideas and tools came change. I asked myself, how could I use my self as an
instrument of change? Simple, by being true to whom I am. What we achieve and how well we
achieve it are “functions of many elements, including our self-efficacy, agency, skills, and use of
support systems to optimize those two factors” (Seashore, 2004). It is essential to be able to
receive feedback when using self because its how the self can improve. Not knowing what was
done wrong leads to more of the same and no change. By using my OD skills to shape who I am
as a person and constantly being aware of myself, I am shifting my interaction with others in a
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positive direction (Seashore, 2004). It takes time to be able to change and channel it into social
interactions to bring change into the world.
In general, the use of self is powerful, and achieves more than faking self. From
orientation to the final turbo course I took, the OD program has truly turned me into a worldlier
individual. I appreciate the classmates I have met and their valued input that enriched every class
I took. In addition, I have seen my self develop in my personal life. I know how to handle
situations differently than before. I used to be quite when it comes to confrontations, but I have
learned to speak up. I learned that I have a voice and an opinion without fear and judgment. I am
satisfied with how I handled myself in the program and in my personal life over the past year and
look forward to taking what I have learned out into the world; for in order to move forward we
should constantly be aware of our tendency to forget where we started because we don't stop and
look at the success that we have already accomplished.
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APPENDIX A: Meeting Design
Tapping Our Potential
Purpose:
! Tangibles
#
Introduce
new
company
intervention:
organization,
increasing
customer
satisfaction,
expanding
our
corporation,
and
boosting
advertisements
#
Define
the
strengths
of
the
intervention
that
will
help
us
move
forward.
#
Decide
on
preventative
solutions
to
sustain
intervention.
#
Use
Solutions
Matrix
to
pick
best
solutions
! Intangibles
#
Objectivity
to
the
decision
making
process
#
Develop
problem-‐solving
skills
#
Collaboration
from
employees
#
Switch
from
autocratic
leadership
to
democratic
Attendees: Total= 9
! Ashraf
Ayoub
(only
for
beginning
introductions
and
wrap-‐
up)
! Employees:
7
individuals
! Digital
marketing
team
! Omneya
Ayoub
What is the Decision Making Process?
! Ashraf
Ayoub,
owner
of
Ashraf
Ayoub
General
Contracting
LLC
has
been
gradually
making
changes
to
his
company
to
become
a
better
manager
and
leader
! This
meeting
is
meant
to
introduce
his
employees
to
these
changes
and
receive
their
constructive
feedback.
! All
ideas
and
discussions
will
be
in
the
presence
of
my
facilitation
and
not
with
Ashraf
! Decisions
made
in
the
future
will
take
into
consideration
the
ideas
formulated
at
the
meeting.
Roadmap:
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Time Intention Activity Logistics/Materials
10:00 am
to
11:00 am
Beginning
Building A Working Community
! Welcome
! Meeting Purpose
! PowerPoint
! Roadmap
! Agenda
- Drinks/ Snacks
- Setup Flipcharts
- Computer for PowerPoint
- Handouts
11:00 am
to
11:35 am
! Check – In
! Introduction Activity in Pairs
5 MINUTE BREAK
11:40 am
to
12:30
pm
Middle
Creating Useful Databases
! Pre-mortem Activity
o Count off by four
o Individual Thinking
o Follow the rotation in
Pairs
- Flip Chart and Markers for
each person
- Masking Tape and Timers
- Worksheets for Activity
10 MINUTE BREAK
12:40
pm
to
1:15 pm
! Develop solutions for the
foreseen problems
! Share generated ideas with
group.
LUNCH BREAK
45 MINUTES
2: 00 pm
to
2:45 pm
Culmination
Making Decisions and Taking Action
! Solutions Matrix Activity
! Allow participants time to rate
solutions
! Collect Ratings and Discuss
Results
! Highlight/Recap next steps
! Close/ Checkout
- Flip Charts with the
strongest recommendations
from previous activity
- Papers for ratings
- Dots
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Design:
! Beginning
o Welcome
o Meeting
Purpose
$ To
introduce
new
company
intervention
$ Establish
preventative
solutions
to
pitfalls
in
future
intervention
o PowerPoint
of
goals
and
ideas
o Present
the
Roadmap
and
how
the
meeting
will
be
applied
o Check
–
In/
Introductions
Activity
o Review
Agenda
! Middle
o Pre-‐Mortem
Exercise
$ Useful
perspective
before
undertaking
an
action
or
initiative
$ Will
allow
us
to
look
forwards
and
backwards
to
anticipate
potential
strengths,
weaknesses,
opportunities,
and
threats
o Group
debrief
on
exercise
! End
o Solutions
Matrix
$ Effectively
decide
on
the
best
solutions
presented
in
the
pre-‐mortem
exercise
$ Will
enable
the
team
to
effectively
prioritize
ideas
and
proposals
o Discuss
and
Recap
Results
o Checkout
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Check-In/Introduction Activity
Check
–
In:
$ State
your
name
and
length
of
time
with
the
company
$ Answer
the
following
Questions:
o What
do
you
expect
to
get
out
of
this
meeting?
o How
does
the
intervention
introduction
change
your
view
of
the
company?
Introduction
Activity:
$ Find
a
partner
$ Each
partner
has
5
minutes
to
discuss
the
following:
o Three
of
your
core
values
o Two
wishes
you
have
for
yourself
in
the
company
o Tell
me
about
a
time
when
you
felt
that
your
organization
was
most
empowered
and
unleashed
you
or
your
team’s
full
potential
o Describe
what
a
productive
meeting
where
all
the
voices
are
heard
looks
like
to
you
$ Listen
to
your
partner’s
story
carefully.
After
the
ten
minutes
you
will
compare
your
answers
to
find
the
similarities
$ You
have
3
minutes
to
draw
a
symbol
with
your
partner
portraying
the
strengths
that
you
will
bring
into
today’s
meeting.
$ Report
out
what
you
drew
and
why.