This document discusses how lesbian relationships are often viewed through the lens of heteronormative expectations of gender roles. Specifically, it explores how the "butch-femme" dynamic arose from attempting to map lesbian couples onto the dominant heterosexual model requiring one partner to fill a "man's" role and the other a "woman's". However, this reinforces the oppression of women's subordinate roles and fails to fully understand lesbian relationships, which are more complex than a simple pairing of opposites. Overall, the document questions whether it is necessary and productive to view same-sex relationships in terms of heterosexual expectations of gender.

1. the butch-femme binary Hegemonic heterosexual scripts in lesbian relationships

2. When you see a lesbian couple, how often do you ask yourself: “Which one’s the man?” http://www.queercents.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2007/08/Lipstick___Dipstick_3.tif.jpg How can you tell?

3. http://cdn.soyoureengayged.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/BrideGroom.jpg What about now?

4. http://www.biggayweddings.com/Resources/dsc2579a.jpeg This one’s a little harder…

5. http://pioneersblog.files.wordpress.com/2011/02/lesbian-couple-flickr-muliphrenic.jpeg How do you make sense of this couple?

6. Or this one? http://img.poptower.com/news-pic-2144/real-l-word.jpg?d=360 Why does it matter?

7. Introduction:making sense of the world In order to easily understand the world that surrounds us, we simplify, generalize, and categorize. The easiest form of generalization is a binary system: man vs. woman republican vs. democrat heterosexual vs. homosexual At a young age, we learn that the ideal, or hegemonic relationship consists of one man and one woman.

8. Introduction:binary systems Society tends to structure the world into twos, even at a basic level of childhood games. Me vs. you Us vs. them Boys vs. girls Men and women are historically understood as opposites, the two categories of biological sex. Heterosexuality is then constructed around this concept of opposites.

9. Introduction:making sense of same-sex relationships Heterosexuality is the socially accepted norm to which all, even homosexual, relationships are compared. The butch-femme binary is a product of the heterosexualization of lesbian relationships.

10. Heterosexuality the basics

11. Heterosexuality: the basics Because heterosexuality is based on polarity, it is crucial that this difference be maintained. The relationship roles that men and women are expected to fill tend to be complementary opposites.

12. Heterosexuality: the basics Hegemonic heterosexuality is the ideal sexual script that influences how we engage in and perceive relationships. one man and one woman a monogamous relationship ultimate goals are marriage and procreation

13. Heterosexuality: the basics Often, we unknowingly judge couples based on their ability to adhere to this hegemonic model. http://h3sean.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/Man-pursuing-woman-300x300.jpg

14. Heterosexuality impacts and implications

15. Heterosexuality: impacts and implications The established polarity within relationships is not natural, it is socially constructed. Social construction: Social phenomena are specific to time and place Sexual and gender identities are cultural and political products dependent on the available categories

16. Heterosexuality: impacts and implications In this context, heterosexuality requires a pair of two opposites. By literal definition, the term “hetero-sexual” means: “sexually attracted to people of the opposite sex.” Since the hegemonic relationship script is heterosexuality, all relationships require two opposites to be legitimate. The only available categories are man and woman, dominant and subordinate. [Wilton 158]

17. Heterosexuality: impacts and implications In order to properly embody the heterosexual model, heteropolarity must be maintained. Heteropolarity The understanding that in relationships, only opposites attract. Positive-negative Strong-weak Man-woman [Wilton 159]

18. Heterosexuality: impacts and implications When we judge couples’ ability to adhere to hegemonic heterosexuality, heteropolarityplays a key role. The model that society identifies as the appropriate relationship requires two opposites. It might seem counterintuitive, but the heterosexual model is still used to assess the validity of same-sex couples.

19. Heterosexuality a new definition

20. Heterosexualitya new definition A different way to look at heterosexuality is through both relationship and sexual roles. In this new definition, the labels “man” and “woman” are identified as follows: Man Sexually dominant individual Women Sexually subordinate individual

21. Heterosexualitya new definition This new definition is not restricted by biological sex. It is only based on a polarity of both sexual and social dominance versus subordination. [Wilton 161]

22. Heterosexualitya new definition “Heterosexual desire is eroticized power difference. Heterosexual desire originates in the the power relationship between men and women, but it can also be experienced in same sex relationships.” Using this definition, a lesbian relationship can be understood in a heterosexual context. [Wilton 161]

23. Heterosexualitya new definition Defining heterosexuality in this context presents several problems. It reinforces the misperception that woman are and ought to be subordinate to men. * It still relies on a binary structure. It is common that relationships are give-and-take where one individual is not dominant in every situation. [Wilton 157]

24. Heterosexualitya new definition However, re-reading heterosexuality in terms of dominance does help answer the question, “Which one’s the man?” in lesbian relationships. But why is it necessary to ask that question in the first place?

25. Conclusions the butch-femme binary

26. Conclusionsthe butch-femme binary When a relationship is evaluated in terms of a heterosexual script, it requires a “man” and a “woman.” The butch-femme couple satisfies this heterosexual model for lesbian relationships. [Wilton 161]

27. Conclusionsthe butch-femme binary The butch-femme dynamic closely models the hegemonic heterosexual script. Butch = Man, Femme = Woman http://images1.fanpop.com/images/photos/2100000/Ellen-Portia-ellen-degeneres-2119413-1222-1191.jpg

28. Conclusionsthe butch-femme binary When examined on a basic level, lesbians are placed into one of these two categories. Lesbian gender-identity is constructed as a binary system due to the influence of heteropolarity. But what do we do when a couple does not appear to fit the heterosexual model?

29. Conclusionsthe butch-femme binary It seems difficult to closely examine a homosexual relationship through a heterosexual lens. How can we understand a relationship based, by definition, on “sameness” while trying to identify the difference?

30. Conclusionsthe butch-femme binary Two problems arise when lesbian relationships are evaluated in terms of heteropolarity. It reinforces the oppression of women in their subordinate and submissive roles. It prevents the acquisition of a complete understanding of lesbian relationships. All relationships, regardless of gender, are significantly more complex than a complementary pair of opposites.

31. Works Cited Wilton, Tamsin. "Which One's The Man? The Heterosexualisation of Lesbian Sex." Sex, Gender, and Sexuality: The New Basics: An Anthology. Ed. Abby L. Ferber, Kimberly Holcomb, and TreWentling. New York: Oxford University Press, Inc., 2009. 157-170. Print.