This document describes the effects of a night of heavy drinking and subsequent hangover. It outlines a fantasy of becoming smart, rich, attractive, and invincible while drinking, followed by becoming stupid, poor, ugly, and fragile during the hangover. The hangover leaves one unable to focus, ill-looking, shaking, and lacking money or pride due to poor decisions made while intoxicated. Others can easily recognize the cause of one's suffering state.

1. YOU INSTANTLY TURN OUT
TO BE AN AUTHORITY ON
EVERY TOPIC IN THE WHOLE
GALAXY.
.

2. You have no doubt you know
everything so you need to give your
knowledge to any person who will pay
attention.

3. You are constantly right. Anyone you
are speaking with is quite incorrect.
This takes for an exciting discussion
when both persons are SMART.

4. • HERE YOU RECOGNIZE THAT
YOU ARE BY FAR THE MOST
APPEALING PERSON IN THE
WHOLE BAR AND THAT ALL
PEOPLE WANT TO BE YOU.

5. You are able to go up to a perfect
stranger acknowledging they fancy
you and really wish to speak with
you.

6. Remember you continue to be
SMART, allowing you to speak
with this person concerning
virtually any topic under the
sun.

7. You all of a sudden end
up being the RICHEST
person in the bar. You can
get drinks for the whole
bar since you have a
bottomless wallet.

8. You can even make table bets at this
time, due to the fact that you are still
SMART therefore, effortlessly, you will
win at all times.

9. In any case, it's not important the
amount you bet since you are
RICH. Besides, you'll buy drinks for
all that you fancy, knowing that
you are obviously the most
APPEALING person there.

10. HERE YOU ARE PREPARED TO
FIGHT WITH EVERYONE, IN
PARTICULAR THOSE WITH
WHOM YOU HAVE BEEN
BETTING OR DISAGREEING.
THE REASON BEING YOU ARE
AT THIS POINT INVINCIBLE.

11. Now you can also go up to the spouses
of the people who you fancy and
challenge them to a fight of wits or
toughness.

12. You have no concern with losing this fight,
simply because, in addition to being
INVINCIBLE you are SMART, you're RICH and
you're more APPEALING than them at any
rate.

13. YOU NOW CAN DO
ANYTHING, SINCE YOU ARE
NOW INVISIBLE. YOU ARE
ABLE TO DANCE ON A TABLE
TO IMPRESS THE PEOPLE
WHO YOU FANCY SINCE
THE OTHER PEOPLE IN THE
ROOM ARE NOT ABLE TO SEE
YOU

14. Additionally you can snog the face off
them for the same reason. You happen
to be also INVISIBLE to folks seeking to
fight you.

15. You may stroll down the street singing at
the top of your lungs simply due to the
fact that nobody can see or hear you
and since you're still SMART you know
all the words.

16. SOBERING UP

17. • WHILE YOU REGAIN CONSCIOUSNESS AND
START TO SAVOR THE THROBBING
HEADACHE, THE CHURNING STOMACH AND
THE COLD SWEATS YOU UNDERSTAND THAT
YOU HAVE LOST NOT JUST MANY HOURS
OF YOUR LIFE BUT ADDITIONALLY THE
CAPABILITY TO FOCUS ON ANYTHING AT
ALL.

18. You are now STUPID and will
continue to be so for at least 12
hours.

19. • IN NO WAY COMPLETELY PLEASED WITH THE
EFFECTS OF THE BATHROOM MIRROR, RIGHT
OFF THE BAT YOU ARE HORRIFIED TO FIND
OUT THAT YOU HAVE NOW TURN OUT TO
BE ACTUALLY UGLIER THAN YOU THOUGHT
POSSIBLE.

20. Besides having bloodshot eyes along with
a fantastic bunch of spots you are
trembling so much that your grandpa
possibly seems much healthier.

21. Sadly you continue to be too STUPID
to know better than to attempt to
shave when shaking.

22. AFTER AN ATTEMPT TO CRAWL
OUT OF BED AND GET DRESSED
LOOKING TO SHAMBLE OUTSIDE,
YOU FIND OUT THAT THE CASH
THAT WAS TO LAST YOU THE
FULL WEEK IS ACTUALLY ABSENT
FROM YOUR WALLET.

23. Being STUPID, you have no idea what
occurred to it but the remnants of
mustard on your clothes enable the
chance that you might have treated all
people to a takeaway sometime.

24. Then again your pocket could have been
picked or you could have offered the
taxi driver a 50 in error

25. Rationalizing that you could hardly potentially
have been that STUPID and that you would
recall being robbed, you arrive at the
conclusion that you were the only person who
ordered any food or drinks for hours and begin
to hate all your buddies.

26. SINCE YOU ARE NOW STUPID,
UGLY AND POOR, YOUR
CONSEQUENTLY FRAGILE SELF-
PRIDE PLUMMETS. YOUR
CURRENTLY FRAGILE FITNESS
MEANS THAT YOU FEEL PRONE
TO BREAK IF ANYONE EVEN
TALKS TO YOU.

27. THIS IS ACTUALLY THE FINAL
PHASE OF SOBERING UP.
SADLY, EVERYBODY CAN
SPOT THIS CONSPICUOUS
ISSUE AND ITS CAUSE FROM
FAR AWAY.

28. More painful, they know that they are able to
complete your agony by making fun of you, and
that you are far too STUPID to get back, too
FRAGILE to kick them, too POOR to bribe them
and too UGLY to hide