Shad Helmstetter lays it out in his great book, "What do you say when you talk to yourself?" is a great weekend read with the tools to bring your life to a screeching halt and turn it around for good!
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Five levels of self talk
1. Identity vs Role Theory
What you do doesn't comprise
who you are or
your “R” is not who you “I”
The Dual Nature of Our Lives
2. Our "I" represents our....
values, beliefs, principles,
desires and emotions--our
inner selves.
Your Identity
3. Our "R" is made up of ......
The many roles we play in
our lives, or our outer
selves.
Your Role
4. If we confuse our role
performances with our values as
a human being, our self-image
will go up and down with each
performance.
Performance
5. Regardless of the level of our
self-image, we constantly
work to bring our
performance into line with
that self-image.
The Risk
6. Therefore, if we translate our "I"
perception as a rating between 1
and 10, without a “10” rating for
our self-image our role
performance will be limited.
The Risk Explained
7. How do you rate your "I"?
What makes up your “I”?
8. If you rate your "I" between 8 and
10, you are a winner!
You have a healthy self-image.
You feel good about yourself most
of the time, no matter how you are
performing in your roles.
A Healthy “I” Rating
9. If you rate yourself between 4 and 7,
you are an at-leaster.
If things go fairly well on your "R" side,
you feel pretty good about yourself. If
your role performance goes badly, you
work to get back to average. People in
this position tell themselves,
"I may not be a winner, but at least I'm not a loser."
A Not So Health “I” Rating
10. If you rate your "I" between 0 and 3,
you're in the category of non-winner.
You allow your role performance to
affect how you feel about yourself.
That poor self-image affects your
performance, putting you in a cycle of
self-defeating attitudes and behaviors.
A Dangerous “I” Rating
11. The Five Levels of Self Talk
How Do We Change Our
“I” Rating?
13. “I just don't have.....
“I just can't seem to …
“I can't imagine ever....
“Today's just not my day”
Level 1 Negative Acceptance
The Most Harmful
14. “I need to ....
“I ought to .....
“I should ......
“I really should lose weight.
Level 2 Recognition of Need
Deceptive at Best
15. “I never ......
“I no longer find that ....
“I no longer put off .......
“I never eat more than I need.”
Level 3 Decision to Change
First Truly Effective Level
16. “I have a 33 inch waist and ......
“I have a great job
and my needs are met.”
“I am healthy, organized,
and in complete control of my life.”
Level 4 The Better You
Painting a Completed New Self
17. “It is done.”
“I am one with the Spirit”
“I am worthy of all good things,
my battles are won, I only need to
show up to claim that which is
already complete.”
Level 5 Universal Affirmation
A “Oneness” with Your Maker
18. You must separate your Identity from
your Roles. You must not allow role
failures to cause “hits” to your identity.
Your programming can begin today.
Special thanks to Dr. Shad Helmstetter
And Sandler Sales Training Materials
Shermanmohr at Shermanmohr dot com
Summary