Autism - making sense of sex and sexuality for parents and professionals

1. Autism
Making sense of Sex
&
Sexuality
AK Kundra PhD

2. Sex – Sexuality
&
The Challenge
 Sex : Male / Female
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3. Sex is part of our life – Not a
Taboo
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4. Lets Start at the Start
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5. Is there any research
in India on Sexuality
education or
Intervention ?
Zero
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6. 6
Autism - Making Sense of Sex & Sexuality-AKK
Stages of Puberty
Girls – 9 onwards
Boys –12 onwards

7. Why make your Child with autism
learn about Sex & Sexuality
 1. They are as sexual as any NT adolescent
can be.
 Their body grows as per age
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8. Why make your Child with autism
learn about Sex & Sexuality
 2. Sexual Abuse
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9. Why make your Child with autism
learn about Sex & Sexuality
 3. Same Hormones-Same Urges
 Same needs - Same choices
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10. Why make your Child with autism
learn about Sex & Sexuality
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 4. Internet Porn

11. Know Touch – No Touch
Prevent Abuse before it happens
 No secret touches
 Teaching to say “ NO “
 Teach Self-protective skills
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12. Sexual abuse
 Starts from known persons – rarely from
strangers
 Caregivers - Secondary
 Therapists
 Teachers
 Personal assistants like drivers, maids,
chowkidars etc
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13. Sexuality teaching:
Whose duty is it?
 60% home and parents
 30% school
 10% by specialists like physicians etc
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14. What is sex?
 Sex is just a behaviour. - J. Bering (2012)
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15. Goals
 -Boy or Girl
 -Ladies room or Men’s room
 -With whom can your child get :
 - Naked
 - Masturbate
 - Help with toileting or Menstruation
 - Touch certain parts of his or her body
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16. Myths about Sexuality
 That adolescents or young adults with autism
have no interest in Sexuality
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17. Myths about Sexuality
 They are hypersexual
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18. Myths about Sexuality
 They are solely heterosexual
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19. The truth about Sexuality
 Understanding of Sexuality must be
proactively pursued
 Not after an abuse has happened leaving the
child in trauma.
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20. Masturbation
 The most typical sexual behaviour among
individuals with autism
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21. Masturbation
 Is normal and should not be condemned
 Exploring genitals for self-pleasure and starts
in infancy itself
 No one teaches Masturbation – it is learnt on
their own
 May or may not reach orgasm
 Masturbation may be the only sexual outlet for
most people with autism
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22. Where to masturbate?
 Create private spaces to masturbate in
- his or her bedroom
- Avoid teaching use of bathroom
- Teach rules for correct time / place
- Make him aware that its not always an option
- Provide private time
- Schedule private time and help them
understand
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23. Let him masturbate if he or she
feels like doing it:
 Masturbation is not dirty or a sin
 Its normal part of his sexuality
 You should not let guilt or shame overtake
your child
 And it is NOT unhealthy
 At most it can irritate the skin around the
Penis.
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24. Do girls with autism Masturbate?
 The answer is YES.
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25. Girls : Is it OK?
 It is NORMAL for your daughter to have sexual
urges and interest.
 Discussing masturbation is an anxiety-provoking
moment for any parent.
 Take up the topic with your daughter in a manner
that is consistent with your family’s belief system.
 Set rules that are both age appropriate and
comfortable for you to follow through with. This
includes acknowledging
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26. Inappropriate Touch
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27. Inappropriate Touch
 Hugging
 Kissing
 Touching privates
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28. Prevention
 Make your son or daughter independent in
ADLs
 Make him sleep in his own bed
 Teach personal hygiene
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29. When your son sleeps alone in
his own bed -
 He is NOT lonely
 He is learning to be independent
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30. Oedipus Complex
 Is a mother-son fixation
 Leads to the son never being independent of
the mother.
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31. Visual Simulation
 More in women compared to me
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32. Crucial age for parents
 13 years to 19 year olds
 Behaviours reach a peak till 19
 Taper off post teens
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33. Arousal Behaviours – Aggressive
that could be assaultive or SI
 Some anti-psychotics cause longer and
consecutively painful erections
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34. Sexual Arousal
 Satvik food : No Onion – No Gralic
 Making them wear loose/tight clothes
 Keeping them away from visual stimulants
 Keeping them meaningfully engaged
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35. Areas that Require Attention
 Individual values, ethics, morals, social
responsibility
• Respect wishes of others
• Religious beliefs
• Appropriate public vs. private behaviour
• Touch: when, what, where, who
• Never OK to touch a younger child
• Masturbation - May need direct instruction
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36. Is marriage possible?
 Possible, but not advisable.
 Even if marriage is possible, it may or may not
be consummated.
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37. Is Temple Grandin married?
 Temple Grandin, a savant and the most
visible face of autism choose not to marry.
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38. Any Questions?
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