We asked several dozen of the smartest, most thoughtful people we know what they wish they had been told before going to college. Here's what they said.

1. For the Bronxville High School Class of 2016
June 2016
Ned Kenney and Francesca de la Rama
BHS ’06
STUFF WE WISH WE HAD BEEN TOLD
BEFORE WE WENT TO COLLEGE

2. A Couple of Quick Things…
The views and opinions expressed in this presentation are those of the authors (although, for the record, they
gleaned most of this stuff from friends and family members who are much better at life than they are). This
presentation does not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of the companies for which the authors
work, their parents, their known associates in organized crime, or their considerable networks of Myspace
friends.
Please keep in mind as you’re reading this document that it’s simply impossible to adhere to every guideline
herein. (This is especially true for the authors, who have been consistently disappointing themselves and
those around them for many years.)
[Moving from the 3rd to the 1st person…]
That said, we hope at least a few ideas will resonate with you—and change your perspective/behavior for the
better—as you prepare to kick butt in college and beyond.
Good luck!
Ned Kenney
nken87@gmail.com
Francesca de la Rama
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3. Academic
• Leave college having forged great relationships with at least two professors. Invest in them, and help them invest in
you; take them to lunch, go to office hours, take multiple classes with them, do the readings before class, ask
questions, and get good grades. You will learn a lot from them, and you will have two real advocates when you
inevitably need a reference/recommendation.
• Course/professor selection is critical. Your best resource is people a year or two older than you.
• Ugh, GPA totally matters.
• Cheating is never worth it, and don’t sweat the people who are cutting corners. Keep your head down and get your
work done.
• Half the battle is staying organized.
o Keep your files up to date in Dropbox or Google Drive.
o Use a calendar app for keeping track of deadlines and to-dos.
• What’s your ‘story’? Takeclasses that work toward that story. (It’s OK if the story changes.)
• STUDY ABROAD, if given the opportunity. Your stateside friends will be there when you get back. Take advantage of
an opportunity to immerse yourself in a new culture and meet new people.
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4. • Course Selection
o In an era of rapid change, course content is less important than learning how to think critically, frame a
question, and express yourself clearly. Think about the underlying skills you want to take into the world rather
than simply punching a ticket.
o Pick courses not on the basis of the description, but rather on the reputation of the professor for challenging
students. Students tend to do better when they are intellectually engaged, even if the material is difficult.
Remember that performing well in a class with a top notch professor builds your confidence.
o Seek out advice from older students, but be discerning about doing what they say in terms of what fits best
with your abilities and interests. Be skeptical about advice that includes phrases like, ‘The professor gives good
notes,’ or, ‘The tests are easy or right from the book, so you don't have to go to class.’
o Seek out smaller classes and seminars, so that you get to know your professor and expand your circle of
friends.
• Interacting with Professors
o Avoid being ‘high maintenance’. Complete assignments on time and identify crunch periods ahead of time, so
that you can responsibly ask for an extension. Don't miss a deadline and then expect the professor to solve
your problem.
o Create a good impression in your email communications with your professors. Don't use first names unless the
professor invites you to. Don't use slang and texting abbreviations.
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Academic, ctd.
Words of Wisdom from a Dartmouth Professor

5. Work – From Internships on Up
• First priority: keep your immediate boss/supervisor happy. Good ways to do so: anticipate their needs and make
progress to address those needs before being asked.
• Appearance:
o Clothing: It’s not about the brand or the price, it’s about how well you take care of your stuff. Find a good tailor
and makesure everything fits. Keep things dry cleaned/ironed/washed/steamed/etc. Look CRISP.
o Easy on the cologne/perfume.
• Unfortunately, attention to detail really does matter.
• Actively seek feedback - but don't be annoying about it.
• Don’t be ‘that guy’ or ‘that girl’ at events with alcohol. 2 drinks, maximum.
• If you become known as unfailingly reliable, the most interesting opportunities will find you.
• If you aregoing to identify a problem, ALWAYS attempt to accompany it with a solution.
• Mistakes happen. Don’t cover them up; take immediate responsibility and move on. And don’t make the same
mistake twice.
• Keep your personal life/emotions out of the workplace.
• Don’t takenegativefeedback personally. Everyone has room to improve.
• Keep track of your most impressive accomplishments/substantive contributions in real time. This list will be
indispensable to preparing for performance reviews, negotiating a raise/promotion, and updating your resume.
• Keep the following at your desk:
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o Napkins
o Tide pen
o Deodorant
o Mouthwash and gum
o Umbrella
o OTC and prescription medications
o Razor (guys)
o Tampons (girls)
o Fresh pair of socks and shirt/blouse
o Lint roller

6. Public Speaking/Presenting
• Be prepared! Preparedness = confidence. It’ll show.
• Smile. Throw in some jokes. Make people feel at ease.
• Good charts win meetings!
• Anticipate likely questions/points of confusion and address them proactively.
• If you’re stating something as a fact, make sure it’s definitely true. Have the data to back it up. People will
challenge you on certain things. You won’t get flustered if the facts are on your side AND you can cite them
readily.
• Budget your time to end early. You will always talk for longer than you anticipate, no matter how many times
you’ve practiced.
• SPEAK SLOWLY.
• If you need to use PowerPoint/Keynote, remember that there are two very different types you can develop,
depending on the situation:
1) ‘Leave behinds’, where the deck has to speak for itself when it’s sent around after the presentation. This
deck is an example. If actually presenting it, do NOT just read all the words on the slide. Outline key points
in the notes section and ask the audience to stay with you rather than focusing on reading every word (they
can do that later).
2) Non ‘leave behinds’: you should have no more than 20 words on a slide. Punchy phrases, graphics, lots of
empty space. Use animations so that only one idea shows up at a time.
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7. Talking Good
• Stop saying 'like'.
• Know what you’re going to say before you start speaking.
• Don’t be a ‘hostage talker’: avoid telling long and boring stories.
• Maximize your substance-to-syllable ratio. (Sometimes big words help with this. Sometimes they don’t.)
• Don’t start sentences with 'So…’.
• Don’t interrupt, unless someone’s being really boring.
• Avoid ending statements by trailing up as if you're asking a question…even though you're not.
• Stop apologizing when you didn’t actually do something wrong!
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8. Money Matters
• No matter your academic major or professional aspirations, take a couple of econ classes – including, ideally, one on
financial markets. A lot of very ‘smart’, ‘well-educated’ people are financially illiterate. Don’t be one of them.
• Track your spending (on Mint.com, an Excel spreadsheet, an index card) each month. Get a rough sense, at least, of
where your (and/or your parents’) money is going.
• Credit cards: open a card now if you haven't already. Pay off the balance every month. Establishing a credit score
before you graduate is important for when you need to find an apartment post-college. Cardhub is a good resource.
• Never go without health insurance, even for a few days; getting hurt can spell financial ruin.
• After graduating college: Based on your salary (and any other sources of income, e.g. your parents), stick to a budget
that allows you to put 5% of your pretax income in a savings account (AND contribute to your 401k—see below)
without taking on debt. This is your ‘rainy day’ fund. Keep your fingers crossed it never rains!
• Investing
o After graduating college, max out your 401k matching at work (or put in whatever you can spare from your
pretax income even if there’s no match) and get exposure to financial markets that way.
o If you have the resources to take on additional exposure to financial assets, open up a personal account at
Schwab, E*Trade, Scottrade, Ameritrade, et al. (do your homework to determine which is right for you).
o Don't buy individual stocks or shares of ‘actively managed’ funds (which have higher fees without better
performance) - buy Vanguard index funds (for both stocks and bonds).
o You’re young – go overweight equities (i.e. take on more risk) but diversify with bond funds as well.
o Only put money into financial assets that you know you won’t need for YEARS. Market fluctuations and fees will
eat you up if you prematurely liquidate.
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9. Being a Modern-Day Awesome Chick / Real Solid Dude
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• Show up on time. If you’re ‘really nice’ but you’re alwayslate, you can and should do better.
• Write a handwritten thank you note when someone goes above and beyond to help you.
• Making eye contact is almost always a good thing.
• Huge leg up if you can remember people’s names.
• Don’t make life difficult for the person doing everyone a favor. Someone’s planning an outing? Needs you to send
her money so she can buy tickets for the group? If you make her email you three times and your only response is
‘Chill out, I’ll pay you’ before begrudgingly doing so, you can and should do better.
• If you don’t take photos, that’s fine: just don’t give people who DO takethem a hard time.
• No important conversations over text message or email – do it in person.
• Always exude confidence, but never act as if you are the smartest person in the room - even if you know you
probably are.
• It takes work to be a good friend and neighbor. Most people know to avoid sins of commission. Be mindful of sins of
omission! (e.g. not RSVPing to stuff or missing a chance to do something nice for someone with minimal effort).
• Reachout to people when something bad has happened to them. They’ll always remember your kindness.
• Never make decisions when you’re angry and/or upset. Take a walk, call a friend, cool down, and then reassess the
situation. Ideally, sleep on it.
• Stay off your phone when socializing. Be fully present whenever you can!
• It's rarely the screwup that ruins careers, relationships, etc. It's the cover-up of the screwup. BE HONEST AND
ACCOUNTABLE. (Required reading, will takeyou less than an hour: 'Lying' by Sam Harris. http://bit.ly/237NGx2)
• Be direct with people and articulate your concerns/frustrations earlier rather than later. Give people a chance to fix
things. If you seethe in silence, you are not a victim.

10. Miscellany to Keep in Mind
• GET ENOUGH SLEEP, EAT WELL, AND EXERCISE REGULARLY.
• Avoid going ‘a level up’ in arguments, e.g. ‘People warned me you were like this,’ or ‘You’re selfish and I hate
you.’Stick to the specific issue at hand.
• Beware of people who feel backed into a corner. They do strange, unpredictable things. If at all possible, give
these people an out – e.g. if you see someone trying to walk off with your phone, say, ‘Hey, might you have
accidentally mistaken my phone for yours?’ That way, you’ve addressed the situation without having needed
to levy a serious allegation.
• Find a hobby you’re passionate about and keep at it. Volunteering, woodworking, taxidermy, philately…it
doesn’t really matter what, so long as you’re enjoying yourself and continually improving at whatever you’re
doing.
• SAY YES TO EXPERIENCES. Concerts, trips, whatever. Just say yes. The value of an experience only grows with
time: the opposite is true of most material things.
• Traveling with people is a great chance to get to know them. It’s not just about the destination; enjoy every
train ride!
• The number of people you are in regular contact with will peak during college. And that's totally OK.
Predictable, even. The rest of your 20s is about investing in the people who really matter. Surround yourself
with those who cheer your successes, pick you up when you fall, and can be trusted with confidential
information. 10

11. Big Ideas to Guide You
• The golden rule will almost always help you figure out the ‘right’ thing to do: TREAT OTHERS THE SAME
WAY YOU WANT TO BE TREATED!! (Unless you’re a masochist.)
• There’s no bigger buzz kill than a guy who takes himself too seriously.
• It’s better to be wise than right.
• People won’t remember what you did or said – they’ll remember how you made them feel.
• Serendipity can only happen if you show up!
• Be a net ‘giver’ and avoid sustained exposure to people who are ‘takers’. The key to healthy relationships is
reciprocity. Good people find ways to contribute.
• No crying over spilt milk. Move on. This approach eliminates like 98% of the things people get upset about.
• Be critical of yourself, but ONLY to the extent doing so helps you improve. Beyond that, cut yourself a
break!
• Delayed gratification: Do something your future self will thank you for.
• ***Gratitude and positivity: practice them!***
o Remember where you came from and the people who helped you get where you are today.
o What happened today that you’re grateful for?
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