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Tumby; Or, In Defense of Julian Palmer
1.
2. Foreword.
By Liam Doyle
I first met Julian Palmer in September of 2004
during the first days of our first semester at the De
La Salle College in Wicklow town, Co. Wicklow. He
was a spritely young fellow whose auburn hair fell
over a cherubic face like the beaded curtains to a
living room of promise. Nervous in this new setting,
as I was, we quickly dusted for common ground or
something to stretch into a conversation. The word
KoRn was written on his pencil case. This was how it
began.
3. I will not tell you that the length of time I’ve
known Julian Palmer has been in any way
advantageous alone in understanding him,
rather, in order to fully examine the nucleus of
his ways, the only fruitful methods are those
that observe him through the eyes of a stranger.
Too often during my studies have I caught myself
speaking in his language or posturing myself in a
manner similar to his during a noodle rage or
poo arse. Indeed, the only way to examine the
man is through removal. Scientific detachment.
4. It cannot be stressed enough that the following
should not be read as a definitive study based
on any of the empirical data collected thus far.
This is merely an impressionistic glance at a man
who has baffled all, and whose few answers
have served only to birth new and maddening
questions.
~ Dr. Liam Doyle,
Department of Weird Craic.
5. “Now I am become
death, destroyer of
worlds.”
~ J. Robert
Oppenheimer
35. Fin.
Special Thanks
The Department of Weird Craic.
The Weird Craic Archives.
Weird Craic Monthly.
Mothers Against Weird Craic.
Students Against Weird Craic.
Weird Craic Matters.
All Craic Matters.
The Committee for Weirder Craic.
Editor's Notes
* A recurring theme in the behaviour of Julian Palmer.
* Interesting to note how he assigns music to various people (including himself) and situations.
* A light hearted break during research gave me the opportunity to join him for a moment, gain insight into his habits, and cultivate trust.
