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The Need to be Needed
Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
Twos: The Need to be Needed
ENNEAGRAM
PERSONALITY TYPES

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The Need to be Needed
Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
The Course Topics series from Manage Train Learn is a large collection of topics that will help you as a learner
to quickly and easily master a range of skills in your everyday working life and life outside work. If you are a
trainer, they are perfect for adding to your classroom courses and online learning plans.
COURSE TOPICS FROM MTL
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The Need to be Needed
Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
ARE YOU READY?
OK, LET’S START!

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The Need to be Needed
Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
INTRODUCTION
Twos - Helpers - are the "people" people of the Enneagram.
At point two, they are the first of the trio who experience
life through their feelings. Helpers remind us that
organisations do not exist without the people in them and
the connections and communications that take place all the
time between people. Twos probably know and are known
by more people than any other type. They move effortlessly
across the normal boundaries of organisations as well as up
and down the organisation's structures. They put no limits
on what they will do to help others, even if sometimes such
offers of help are accompanied by emotional strings of
dependency.

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
A SUMMARY OF TWOS
Group: heart or "feeling" group
Label: helpers, givers
Drive: the need to be needed
Orientation: moving towards others through their emotions
Childhood orientation: an uncertain view of whether their
father loved them or not
Problem: over-developed feeling towards others
Preoccupation: the personal lives and doings of others,
family and friends
Sin: pride
Routes to growth: humility
Characteristics: outgoing; friendly; affiliative; caring;
sympathetic; optimistic; sweet; seductive; helpful;
concerned; quick to form friendships; likeable; others-
oriented; gossipy; nosey.
Strategy: the expressive-clinging character.

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
HOW TO RECOGNISE A TWO
Twos are people who have the ability to make instant
contact with others, whether family, friends or strangers.
They are skilled and natural communicators.
The language used by Twos is the language of contact. They
seem to know instinctively what to say to others. Words are
easy because their emotions lead. They are often rapid
talkers because their emotions flow quicker than their
thoughts. Theirs is not intellectual, sophisticated or
contrived language but direct, plain-speaking, everyday
language. The wisdom of Twos is folksy and homespun.
Twos can adjust themselves according to who they're talking
to. They can easily slip into the current idiom, parlance or
way of speaking. Their motives are, or appear to be,
heartfelt and genuine and they therefore make good
listeners, sentence-finishers, gossips and advisors.

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
ON THE COUCH
Twos had ambivalent feelings towards their father or father
figure when young. They were not sure whether he loved
them or not.
Twos feel they have to earn love from others, particularly
those in powerful positions. In other words they cannot wait
for love to come to them, just in case it doesn't. They have
to go out and get it for themselves. The only way Twos know
how to do this is to make others need them.
In childhood, Twos' self-talk included thoughts such as: "I
have to dramatize events to get noticed"; "If I don't cling to
others, they'll leave me" and "I must be nice to others and
helpful".

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
A CONTINUUM OF HEALTH
At their psychologically healthiest, Twos are the most
altruistic and giving of all the personality types. They give
themselves freely with no expectation of reward.
As they deteriorate in psychological terms, Twos start to
notice that their own needs for love are not being met.
There then become conditions on their love and friendship,
conditions which Twos do not often recognise.
These conditions demand something in return - that others
comply with what Twos want. At their very worst, Twos get
nothing back. From behaving like a martyr at their best, they
end up feeling like a victim.

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
HEALTHY TWOS
Healthy Twos are selfless, caring and loving.
Healthy Twos love others unconditionally and don't expect
anything back in return. They have an inexhaustible well of
goodwill towards others, particularly those who need help.
Healthy Twos are deeply caring. They feel for the plight of
others in need, whether the starving in other countries or
the personal problems of friends and relatives. They are
always there when needed at whatever time of day and
night and are willing to forgive the faults and weaknesses of
others that have led them into trouble.
At their best, Twos are practical helpers, who are willing to
give up their time and energy to organise disaster funds and
appeals. Twos are always at the forefront when an
emergency occurs and people need rescued.

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
AVERAGE TWOS
Average Twos are friendly, close and manipulative.
Average Twos are less altruistic than Healthy Twos because
they now care for others partly for their own reasons. One
of these reasons is that helping others makes the Two feel
good and wanted.
As they move down the psychological scale, Twos come to
believe that they will only feel good about themselves if
they have a circle of friends or family who need them all the
time. Thus they create a group of people, perhaps the old,
the sick, the young, family, colleagues, who are dependent
on them and will always need them.
As they devote more of their energies to others, Average
Twos may start to lose the love of those who are close to
them. They then use various strategies, such as feigning
illness, to ensure they get others back.

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
UNHEALTHY TWOS
Unhealthy Twos are scheming, coercive and victimised.
Unhealthy Twos deteriorate psychologically when others fail
to respond to their lovingness and do not get back what
they think they deserve. This can happen when a marriage
falls apart, a relationship founders or a boss does not
appreciate their contribution at work.
In these cases, the Two will resort to extreme measures to
cling on to others. They can make others feel guilty, shower
them with gifts, or feign serious illness to stop the other
person from leaving. At its most extreme, Twos can do the
most frightening things. The character played by Glenn
Close in the film "Fatal Attraction" in which a mistress
terrorises the lover who rejects her, shows the depths to
which a Two will plunge in their desperation to be loved.

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
ROLES
The roles that Twos take on include:
• the Jewish Momma
• the Italian Mother figure
• the Queen Bee
• the boss's secretary who really runs the show but lets
the boss take all the glory
• the guardian angel
• the nurse who wants things done his or her way
• the gatekeeper
• the housekeeper who gets deferred to
• the counsellor or agony aunt dispensing advice to those
in trouble
• mother's little helper
• the homespun philosopher
• the well-meaning gossip.

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
THE WORKING STYLE OF TWOS
Twos embody the working style of the PLEASE OTHERS. They
thrive in locations where they can help others. Their first
thought in a new job is "what are others like?".
Twos have a wide circle of friends and keep in regular
contact with them. This can be of immense value for
workplace relationships.
Twos like to care for others. They can empathize with them
and show genuine interest. Twos will remember little things
about everyone and are continually seeking to find out
more.
The downside of this working style is that Twos rarely have
personal goals, ideas or plans of their own. Everything a Two
does is related to others.

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
THE TEAM TWO
A Two is likely to build their own team of people who like
the Two, depend on the Two and need the Two. Those who
are emotionless, critical, loners or non-people people won't
get a look in.
Twos pride themselves on their large social network which
reaches out far beyond the immediate team. They are
particularly attracted to those who are chatty, friendly and
amiable like themselves.
Twos have a remarkable ability to adjust themselves to the
person they are with, homing in on just what that person
needs. Thus, they sometimes find it confusing when they
work in large teams where they have difficulty carving out a
role. They come into their own in one-to-one relationships
where they can quickly make contact and identify with the
other person.

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
THE TWO SUBORDINATE
Because they need to be needed, Two subordinates look to
a boss who needs them.
When they find such a relationship, a Two can be a trusted
junior confidant to whom the boss can turn in times of
trouble, day or night, in work or out. Twos will always be
there, willing to listen, to share and to offer words of
support.
However, Two subordinates - like the seemingly devoted
wife behind every successful man - can turn their position to
personal advantage. They are quite ready to play politics as
the power behind the throne, using their easy access to the
boss to promote themselves.

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
THE TWO BOSS
It can be exhausting being a Two boss. A Two boss sees their
role as being Helper of the team. They will make sure they
check up on how everyone is at least once a day. If anyone
has a problem, Twos throw themselves into seeing that it is
sorted out at once.
Two bosses remember all the personal details about their
team. They never forget anyone's birthday, a date for a
meeting, a team celebration or the welcome for a new
member of the team. They love nothing better than for
others to pour their heart out to them.
When they exhaust themselves from so much giving, Twos
expect others to show their thanks and gratitude in
compliant ways - by leading their lives in the ways Twos
want. When this fails to happen, Two bosses feel like giving
up on their ungrateful staff - until the next time someone
needs them.

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
MANAGEMENT CONCEPTS
A Two organisation has the following features:
1. human resource policies are centre-stage
2. customers' needs are researched and met
3. the organisation is seen as one big happy family
4. people are organised into teams
5. the management style is one of nannying, consulting,
counselling and supporting
6. decisions are taken by consensus, soundings and
harmony
7. soft female traits are prized above hard male traits (the
territory of the Eight organisation)
8. the aim of management is to know how we feel now
and did once before
9. thought is given to innovative employee benefits such
as childcare
10. there is always a collection box going round for
someone who is leaving, pregnant, getting married,
retiring...

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
SYMBOLS
The symbols of Twos include the following:
• animals: kittens and puppies
• cuddly toys
• children, orphans, refugees, the homeless
• charities, appeals, money-raising days
• romantic novels
• religion
• love in all its forms.
Love in all its facets is the chief theme in the life of Twos. At
its healthiest, love can be totally selfless, wanting the best
for someone else for nothing in return. At a superficial level,
it can be gushy, hearts-and-flowers, good feelings love in
which nothing really happens. At its most dangerous, love
can be destructive love, bordering on hate, particularly
when the other person fails to respond to the Two.

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
A TWO IS SOMEONE WHO...
A Two is someone who likes to match-make others
romantically.
A Two is someone you can ring up in the middle of the night
and they won't mind.
A Two is someone who can lose themselves in romantic
fiction.
A Two is someone who likes others to trust them
unsparingly but doesn't give anything like the same amount
of trust in return.
A Two is someone who will use illness to get others to do
what they want.
A Two is someone who likes to work while chatting to
someone else.
A Two is someone who needs to know what is going on with
friends, colleagues and family.
A Two is someone who likes to reward themselves
frequently for all the good they do.

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
A TWO'S DEVELOPMENT
The root sin that Twos need to free themselves from is
Pride. This is the pride that comes from believing that others
are dependent on you. The route to this freedom is to move
to the position of healthy Fours who have discovered the
benefits of distance from others.
Twos can help themselves in a number of ways including...
Not: altering yourself to suit others,
but...being yourself whether others like you or not.
Not: letting others determine how you feel;
but...being aware of your own feelings.
Not: fearing that independence might mean no one will
ever love you again;
but...believing that others will love you for who you are.

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
NOTEWORTHY TWOS
Some noteworthy Twos include:
• Mother Teresa of Calcutta, missionary nun
• Diana, Princess of Wales
• Eva Peron, wife of Argentina's dictator in the 1950's
• Barbra Streisand
• John Denver, country singer
• Liz Taylor, movie actress
• Abraham of the Bible
• Mary Magdalene
• Marge Simpson of the cartoon "The Simpsons"
• Margot Fonteyn, ballet dancer
• Ruth, daughter-in-law of Naomi of the Bible
• Luciano Pavarotti, opera singer
• Mick Jagger, lead singer of the Rolling Stones
• John Keats, poet.

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
THAT’S
IT!
WELL DONE!

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Enneagram Personality Types
MTL Course Topics
THANK YOU
This has been a Slide Topic from Manage Train Learn