The Art of Negotiation: Straight Up Business with a Soft Touch

THE ART OF
NEGOTIATION
www.ChrisEfessiou.com
Chris Efessiou, PhD
© 2010-2014 Chris Efessiou & Team Company - All Rights Reserved

WHY WE NEGOTIATE
“In business as in life, you
don't get what you deserve, you
get what you negotiate.”
Dr. Chester L. Karrass
Tweet your Questions using: #artofnegotiation @ChamberCWB

ART OR SCIENCE?
Negotiation is an Art,
Not a Science.
SciencePractice

ART OR SCIENCE?
3 Major Tools

LISTEN
OBSERVE
SPEAK
40%
THE SCIENCE OF
NEGOTIATION
40%
20%

LISTEN, LISTEN, LISTEN
Verbal Nuance
Timing is off: i.e.:“I am so sad about this.”
Pause... And then the sad expression.

Verbal Nuance
Emotionless facial expression
when talking.

Verbal Nuance
Out of proportion reaction

Verbal Nuance
When the subject is changed,
there is visible physical and emotional relief.

Verbal Content
Responding to a comment or question
by offering a belief, instead of an
answer.
Q: Is the information in this report true?
A: I believe in being honest

Verbal Content
Constantly offering
additional details
to fill the silence.

Verbal Content

Verbal Content
They use such phrases as
“To tell you the truth,”“To be perfectly honest,”
and “Why would I lie to you?”

Verbal Content
The answer to a “casual question” is
very specific, and sounds rehearsed.

Verbal Content
They repeat your question.

OBSERVE, OBSERVE,
OBSERVE
Body Language
Reduction in physical space
(shrinking to avoid physical exposure)

OBSERVE, OBSERVE,
OBSERVE
Body Language
Hand movement to the mouth,
face, or throat

OBSERVE, OBSERVE,
OBSERVE
Body Language
Stiffness or
mechanical
movement

OBSERVE, OBSERVE,
OBSERVE
Body Language
Playing with a physical object, or placing a
physical object (a coffee mug) between the two
of you as a barrier. Mug on table in center.

OBSERVE, OBSERVE,
OBSERVE
The Chair Factor
Rolling the chair
away from you

OBSERVE, OBSERVE,
OBSERVE
The Chair Factor
Locking legs
around chair legs

MY CARDINAL RULES OF
NEGOTIATION
Be prepared, realistic and always
have a contingency plan.

NEGOTIATION
Do not ignore the unpleasant facts
of the situation by burying your
head in the sand like an ostrich.

NEGOTIATION
1. Never underestimate
your opponent or
overestimate yourself.

NEGOTIATION
2. Always craft a Win-Win scenario
I Win
You Lose
I Win
You Win
I Lose
You Lose
I Lose
You Win

NEGOTIATION
3. Be prepared to
give up
something to gain
more. You are
shooting a motion
picture, not a still
photograph.

NEGOTIATION
4. Do not appear
as if you are
holding all the
cards, even if
you are.

NEGOTIATION
5. Do not lose
sight of the
Big Picture

NEGOTIATION
6. Do not lose
sight of the
small picture
either. The devil
is in the details.

NEGOTIATION
7. Mean what you say, say what you mean,
hold everyone to the same standard,
commit key points to paper and sign.

NEGOTIATION
8. Have multiple contingency
plans and an exit strategy

NEGOTIATION
9. Remove all “emotional advantages”
from the opposite side.

NEGOTIATION
10. If unable to do so,
remove all visible or
audible comments
that may signal the
other side that you
are emotionally
engaged with the
subject under
negotiation

NEGOTIATION
11. Have a clear “deal breaker” point;
this is the point you are not willing to cross

NEGOTIATION
12. Know the value of
walking away from the
deal.The best deal is
often the one that is
never made.

Preparation
Clarify &
Identify
Interests
Exchange Views
& Positions,
Persuade
Movement
Exchange
Deal
LISTEN
THE FLOW OF NEGOTIATION
LISTENLISTEN
LISTEN

PLAN
What is it that the
other party wants?

PLAN
What are you prepared to
give up to get there?

PLAN
What isYOUR
“Deal-breaking Point”

PLAN
Before proffering any deal ask
yourself, “Would I buy this?”

PLAN
If you can’t buy it,
you can’t sell it.

PLAN
If you can’t sell it,
nobody would buy it.

CLARIFICATION DO’S &
DON’TS
Do:
Listen More…
Talk Less

CLARIFICATION DO’S &
DON’TS
Don’t: Ask
closed-ended
questions that
begin with “Do”
or “Will”

INTERESTS, OPTIONS,
ALTERNATIVES
No MY option.
NoYOUR option.
Invent a
mutual option.

THOU SHALL NOT
THREATEN!
No ultimatums
unless you are
prepared to
deliver.

THOU SHALL
REMEMBER…#1
No Integrity = No Trust
No Trust = No Deal

THOU SHALL
REMEMBER…#2
A negotiation is not a signed
agreement. It is a referendum
on the character of the
negotiating parties.

THOU SHALL
REMEMBER…#3
Any void in integrity is an
absolute predictor of the
impending outcome.

THE ART OF
NEGOTIATION
Chris Efessiou, PhD
Open Discussion

The Art of Negotiation: Straight Up Business with a Soft Touch

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