Have you ever wondered why some people appear not to be affected by problems life ‘throws’ at them? If only – you wonder – you could deal with life in the same way!

1. What was your day like?

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What was your day like?
How many times has your day ended with a sense of
disappointment, hurt or even anger as a result of an
experience? What caused it?
Maybe a colleague (or even your boss) acted so
unfairly that you believe they deliberately set out to
upset you.
Or was it a friend, a family member or your partner
who said something so mean that you were left
speechless and feeling deeply hurt?

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What was your day like?
Have you ever wondered why some people appear
not to be affected by problems life ‘throws’ at them?
They simply deal with them and then effortlessly
move on while continuing to enjoy life.
If only - you might wonder - you could deal with life in
the same way! But then you consider yourself to be a
more sensitive person and that’s the reason why you
can’t simply move on so easily from even the small
everyday problems in life.
So, is it ultimately because you are very sensitive?

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How we shape our experience
All that happens in our everyday life is processed
through our senses, mostly at an unconscious level.
This is because the amount of information and
stimuli around us is so vast that there is no way we
can pay attention to everything that happens at every
moment of the day.
So, what do we do?

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How we shape our experience
What we do is ‘filter’ out some things over others.
And, with what we choose to pay attention to, we use
it to create our individual interpretation of what
happens. This is what makes our perception of an
event what it is.
Such a perception is uniquely individual; that’s why
another person in exactly the same situation will
experience it differently. They will draw their own
individual interpretation of what happened.
Thus, it is not the experience in itself that affects us,
but how we interpret it.

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The way we think
Problems are not separate from the way we think
about them.
Problems ARE the way we think about them.
When we experience pain in our lives, we may also
experience little or no choice. “Why is this happening
to me?” you may ask yourself.

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The way we think
Yet, it’s not about changing others, every day
circumstances or even the world.
Even if you were given a magic wand to make this
happen, you would still end up interpreting details or
situations that you see or experience in line with
what you pay attention to; thus, filtering out anything
else which, if included in the ‘equation’, would give
you a totally different interpretation of the same
experience or event.
And a change in the way you interpret that same
event will instantly change how you feel about it.

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Enrich your life
We do not operate directly on what happens in our
everyday life, but on our perception of what happens.
If you feel that an experience is impoverishing your
life, question it. Likewise, you could simply ask
yourself this simple question, “What else could this
mean?”
Ask yourself this question several times and then
use each answer to compile an array of different
interpretations to what happened.

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Enrich your life
Ultimately, it is not so much about picking and
choosing the one you like most (although you could
do this if it works for you), but it is about expanding
your initial interpretation so that your experience
becomes more meaningful and you feel you have
more options on how you deal with it.
It is not the experience in itself, but how you perceive
it - hence what you do with it - that enriches your life.

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What was your day like?