Aging means change, but not necessarily decline. Everybody's doing it, so let's figure out how to make it a positive experience. Here is a full description of our confused beliefs about aging, and how you can turn that around to age gracefully and elegantly...and have fun doing it.

1. ELEGANT AGING
Emotional Wellness Processes for
Body/Mind Renewal
National Wellness Conference
William G. DeFoore, Ph.D.
Institute for Personal & Professional Development, www.goodfinding.com

2. DEFINING
TERMS
1. Elegant: Characterized by or exhibiting
refined, tasteful beauty of manner, form, or
style.
2. Age: to GROW old, to GROW up, Latin root
“alo” and Germanic root “alt” mean “to
nourish, to bring up”; more generally, alo
means to strengthen, increase and advance—to
become taller and deeper

3. RE-DEFINING
TERMS
3.Aging: (Consider this one…)
living; starts at birth; life process;
becoming an elder; becoming a
sage

4. AGING IS
NO
ACCIDENT
1. If we had eternal youth…it would not be good
2. The challenge of physical and mental change
can make you magnificent…if you let it
3. The spiritual world expands as the physical
world changes

5. CONFUSION
ABOUT AGING
1. The young want to be older, and the old
want to be young
2.Aging is considered a negative word, when
it is actually life itself…begins at birth
and ends at death
3.It is decline we fear—not aging. The
confused thought equates aging & decline.

6. WHY AGING IS
SEEN AS
NEGATIVE
• Fear of death
• Fear of loss: “beauty,” health, function
• Fear of abandonment
• Worship of beauty/youth
• Negative beliefs—Aging means: inevitable
illness, inevitable deterioration, inevitable
loss of attractiveness, increasing need
for medical care

7. THE IMPACT OF FEAR,
FRUSTRATION, &
DEPRESSION

8. THE
ECONOMICS
OF FEAR
• Marketing and advertising
• The entertainment industry
• The insurance industry
• The pharmaceutical industry

9. THE
COST OF CYNICISM,
PESSIMISM &
DESPAIR
• Less likely to try something new
• More likely to give up
• More likely to succumb to
negative emotions

10. THE
HEALTH IMPACT
OF FEAR
• Anxiety and its effects
• The effect of fear on decision
making
• Fear as a vehicle for marketing
and consumer control

11. THE
DEPRESSION WE
CONSIDER TO BE
“NORMAL”
• Depression and the negative view of
aging
• Impact of depression on immune
function
• Impact of depression on diet,
exercise, activity level

12. AGE-OLD
OLD AGE
MYTHS
• Retirement myths & results
• Children as “someone to take care of
me in my old age”
• “Men die before women”
• Sexual desire/ability diminishes
• Dying of “old age”

13. THE BENEFITS OF TRUST,
FAITH & OPTIMISM FOR AGING
AND HEALTH

14. THE IMPACT
OF OPTIMISM
• Resilience and recovery
• Health and longevity
• Decision making
• Risk taking
• Exercise, diet & activity level
• The NECESSITY of a positive attitude
for healthy aging

15. THE BENEFITS OFTHE BENEFITS OF
OPTIMISMOPTIMISM
• Superior healthSuperior health
• Greater achievementGreater achievement
• PersistencePersistence
• Emotional healthEmotional health
• Increased longevityIncreased longevity
• Less stressLess stress
• Explanatory stylesExplanatory styles
(Benefits of optimism in a 15 year study)(Benefits of optimism in a 15 year study)

16. EXERCISES AND SKILLS
• Replacing old beliefs
• Becoming a “Goodfinder”
• The Art of Appreciation
• Focus on positive role models
• Visualizing/imagining healthy aging
• Prayer & meditation

17. THE BENEFIT OF
STORYTELLING
• The unloading of baggage
• The passing on of wisdom
• The honoring of life experience
• The breaking of dysfunctional patterns
• A way of following the natural
recapitulation process

18. • To hear the stories
• To ask:
 Who are your heroes?
 Who were your mentors?
 What are your greatest lessons?
 What are your favorite memories of
beauty, kindness, compassion?
A RITE OF PASSAGE
INTO ELDERHOOD

19. A chance to:
 Show our love
 Express our appreciation
 Celebrate a new beginning
 Honor and value the process of life
 Strengthen connections between youth
and elders
A RITE OF PASSAGE
INTO ELDERHOOD

20. EMOTIONAL WELLNESS
AS A KEY TO HEALTHY AGING

21. LoveLove
HumorHumor
InspInspirationiration
AppreciationAppreciation
YOUR EMOTIONAL GUIDANCEYOUR EMOTIONAL GUIDANCE
SYSTEMSYSTEM
•ANGERANGER
•FEARFEAR
•PAINPAIN
•FRUSTRATIONFRUSTRATION
•IRRITATIONIRRITATION
•DOUBTDOUBT

22. Consider this:
 Nothing is more important than feeling
good right now
 How you feel about your health is more
important than what you do
 Well being is your natural state
 Attitude matters most
USING YOUR
EMOTIONAL
GUIDANCE
SYSTEM

23. Yale study:
 Positive perception of aging-7.6 years
greater longevity
 Influence of body mass, exercise &
nonsmoking-1 to 3 years greater
FEELING GOOD
ABOUT
AGEING

24. Physical:
 Exercise, relaxation, activity
 Understanding the impact of the medical
model on consciousness
 Embracing the self-healing capacity of
the human body
METHODS AND SKILLS
FOR ELEGANT AGING

25. Mental:
 Positive beliefs
 Positive thoughts and expressions
 Positive media and community to support
the above
METHODS AND SKILLS
FOR ELEGANT AGING

26. Emotional:
 Humor, fun, pleasure, joy, play
 Healthy intimacy & social life
 Healthy anger, healthy grieving
 Emotional balance
METHODS AND SKILLS
FOR ELEGANT AGING

27. Spiritual:
 Prayer, meditation
 Creative expression
 Sense of mission & purpose
 Living according to true values
 Positive view of death & afterlife
METHODS AND SKILLS
FOR ELEGANT AGING