2. ersatz punk
People who tried really hard to
nail the theme and ended up
looking ridiculous.
3. CHRISTINA RICCI
I actually love this,
but not with fishnet
stockings, and not on
Christina Ricci. (She
has such an odd shape!
I’m sorry, but it’s
true). It would have
looked great on Gwen
Stefani.
4. AMANDA SEYFRIED
I had curtains in fabric
strikingly similar to this as a
child. I was literally afraid of
them. If you look at it for too
long, monsters appear to
emerge from it. I don’t like
this dress at all, and I think
Amanda’s beautiful porcelain
face is lost in the pattern.
5. ANJA RUBIK
It seems like she’s
leaning forward
awkwardly to conceal
her pantslessness, and
what appears to be a
hem made out of a
piece of jewellery.
6. AUBREY PLAZA
Apparently Aubrey Plaza
is the secret imaginary
girlfriend of nerdy boys in
every corner of the
internet. I don’t know
why, because she always
plays the same sarcastic,
lacklustre character. Her
weird frock is similarly
unappealing.
7. CARINE ROITFELD
It’s not that I don’t
love Bambi. I’m just
not buying the trend
for high-fashion
Disney-themed
knitwear, especially at
formal events.
8. COCO ROCHA
I looked at some close-
up pics if this, and I
still can’t work it out.
Feathers? Moths?
Whatever it is
attached to her
leopard-print
turtleneck dress, it’s
not an improvement.
9. ELIZABETH BANKS
I’m not sure if this
gold jacket would be
better or worse with
the gold trousers it
probably came with.
10. ELLE FANNING
Elle Fanning is into some
weird psychodelic retro
clothes (Google “Elle
Fanning suit”). The tie dye
concept could have been
fun, except for the poor
construction of the frock.
And even hippies know
that you never match your
eye shadow to your
tie-dye.
11. A BOY
IMPERSONATING
JANUARY JONES
I seriously thought
this was a male at
first. The dress might
have been cute, but
the androgynous hair
and makeup are truly
awful.
12. JESSICA BIEL
Apparently Justin
Timberlake tells Jessica Biel
what to wear.
She keeps turning up to
events in dresses with
matching pants, so I assume
he prefers pants, she prefers
dresses, and they compromise
for the sake of the marriage.
There’s no other explanation.
14. JULIANNE HOUGH
Like a lot of others,
Julianne went for a
mohawk-inspired
updo and edgy
makeup. It’s too harsh
on her. The dress is
uninspiring. She tends
to try a bit too hard on
the red carpet.
15. KAROLINA KURKOVA
I have a strong dislike
for Karolina Kurkova,
which I just developed
right now. The
pattern on this dress is
hideous. It looks like
it cost $7.99 from one
of those websites that
sells polyester clothes
suitable only for
clubbing.
17. KERRY WASHINGTON
This Vera Wang ensemble is
just too much. I could be on
board with the purple silk
fabric, and I don’t have an
issue with her pushing the
boundaries for this event.
But there are too many
competing elements. Shorten
the gloves and lose the
peplum and the black mesh
train and we’ll talk…
19. KRISTEN STEWART
I can’t figure out why
Kristen Stewart even
attends these things.
She hates wearing
heels, and loves
privacy, but turns up
to red carpet events in
crazy formal onesies.
20. LENA DUNHAM
With Erdem
Moralioglu, whom I
assume is responsible
for the fashion label.
Lena couldn’t look less
bored, and her arms
aren’t her best feature,
but I have no quarrel
with the dress.
22. LILY COLLINS
Lily clearly just raided
her wardrobe for black
items of clothing and
then wore them all.
With her colouring,
she could have looked
amazing in something
still punk-themed, but
understated.
23. LIYA KEBEDE
I kind of get where
she’s going with this,
but I don’t think she
quite pulls it off. The
explosion of black
tulle doesn’t look like
it belongs there. The
hair doesn’t help,
either.
24. MADONNA
If this event has
demonstrated
anything, it’s that
people need
pants. Madonna
reminds me of Cate
Blanchett in Indiana
Jones 4. Which is
not a compliment.
To either of them.
25. MILEY CYRUS
Remember when we
used to think Miley
Cyrus was gauche and
slightly odd-looking?
In hindsight, I think
that was her chic
phase.
26. NICOLE RICHIE
This dress is Topshop,
and I could admire
both the frock itself
and the decision to
wear a high street
brand to a highbrow
function if it wasn’t
for the radioactive
birdsnest on her head.
27. NINA DOBREV
When I said “people
need pants,” I did not
mean “with dresses.”
28. SIENNA MILLER
The internet seemed
to like this, which
makes me want to go
and live in a cabin in
the woods somewhere.
I think she looks
costumey, and not in a
good way.
30. AMBER HEARD
I’m just uninspired by
this. I guess it’s fine.
It probably doesn’t
help that I keep seeing
Amber Heard
everywhere and don’t
totally know
who she is.
31. ASHLEY OLSEN
Oh Ashley, you weird
little firefly. The dress
under the chiffon cape
might be nice, but the
slightly luminous
effect of the
diaphanous fabric and
its non-descript
muted-brownish-
orangey-yellowy-
blush colour
is...disorienting.
32. CAMERON DIAZ
On reviewing this, it’s
probably technically not that
bad, but I can’t help feeling
that Cameron Diaz just looks
spooky-weird. Like the alien
queen of some extra-
terrestrial kingdom. She
keeps aiming for high
fashion, but she’s really in
her element as a casual
California beach girl.
33. ELETTRA
WIEDEMANN
Elettra is Isabella Rossellini’s
daughter. She has a lovely
face, and apparently she has
modelled in the past, but
she’s not dramatic enough to
carry such a bizarre outfit,
and the combination of pink
and yellow is pretty
nauseating.
34. GWYNETH PALTROW
Gwynnie is just a riddle
wrapped in a mystery inside
an enigma. She wears edgy
black mini dresses to every red
carpet event for years, and
then she’s invited to a punk-
themed function and she opts
for an even less inspiring
doppelganger of the ill-fitting
pink gown she wore to steal
Cate Blanchett’s Oscar.
35. IVANKA TRUMP
The navy and green
colour combination is
very current, so I can
see what she was
aiming for. Needless
to say, she missed the
mark.
38. JOELY RICHARDSON
VANESSA REDGRAVE
and DAISY BEVAN
I know they look a
little outrageous,
but I actually love
these three. They
were among the few
to exploit the trend
for neons, and as a
trio they’ve
appropriately
referenced the punk
theme without
going in costume.
39. THE LADY IN THE
BACKGROUND
I’m doubling up
because I just
realised the lady in
the background is
also wearing
PANTS.
40. KATE BECKINSALE
Kate Beckinsale used
to be sweet and
interesting, but on the
red carpet these days
she almost always
looks a bit trashy. The
dress is okay, but I
wish she didn’t so
often opt for gravity-
defying hair.
43. NAOMIE HARRIS
I’m not in love with
the dress, but the
colour is amazing, and
Naomie is beautiful
enough that she looks
like an exotic bird of
paradise.
44. SOLANGE KNOWLES
I’d like this better if it
had a classic split
down the side instead
of an optical illusion
giving the appearance
of under-shorts. She
can get away with a
lot, though, especially
with that dramatic
hair.
46. UMA THURMAN
Uma is doing her best Blue
Steel here, but she looks like
she thinks she’s attending
the Golden Globes in 1995.
The people in the
background aren’t even
looking at her. This
mermaidy gown just feels
out of place, as does her
over-earnest expression.
49. EMMY ROSSUM
I have déjà vu. Emmy
seems to wear gauzy
cobweblike fabrics a
lot, especially in these
pale, silvery shades.
She’s done it more
successfully in the
past – her hair and
makeup are too much.
50. GIULIANA RANCIC
As always, Giuliana
looks a whisper away
from death. The
heavy-handed makeup
doesn’t help.
51. HILARY RHODA
I could handle the
leather pants, but the
top/dress is
uninspiring.
52. JAIME KING
Once again, this is a
case of trying too
hard. The suit is
probably fine, but not
with this combination
of other features:
high-necked lace top,
gold shoes, elaborate
crown and side-swept
hair. She looks
uncomfortable.
53. JENNIFER MORRISON
The dress is passable,
although I don’t like
it. She looks like a
scary widow. The hair
and makeup are really
ageing. I don’t know
why Jennifer lightens
her hair. She looks so
much better as a
brunette.
54. KATHRYN NEAL
SHAFFER
I have no idea who
this person is. I don’t
actually like her dress,
but she’s beautiful,
and I tend to give
people who look like
early 20th century
fashion illustrations a
free pass.
55. KATIE HOLMES
In the first pic I found of
Katie Holmes, I thought
she looked absolutely
stunning, but it didn’t
show the full dress. Now
that I see it, I think she
looks like a giant squid,
albeit a pretty one.
56. LEELEE SOBIESKI
I don’t know why Leelee
Sobieski gets invited to stuff,
or why she always looks so
stern. I think she wants to be
thought of as an interesting
indie muse rather than a
mainstream movie star, but I
rarely see her in anything.
This might be quite lovely,
but I’m not persuaded that
the embroidered chiffon
sleeves improve the frock.
58. ROONEY MARA
Here is Rooney Mara
in a white dress with
goth makeup, pursing
her lips and nervously
clutching her fingers. I
know I’ve seen this
before.
59. SANDRA LEE
Sandra Lee is a TV
chef and Rich Person.
She once made a
hilarious “Kwanzaa
cake.” Google it.
63. BEYONCÉ
Women who have had
babies probably
shouldn’t attempt to
squeeze their chests
into restricting leather
corsets. Also, are those
matching boots? This
is crazy-ugly.
65. KATY PERRY
Katie Perry is wearing
a Dolce and Gabbana
dress which actually
looked amazing on the
runway, so I
sympathise with her
attempt to carry it off
in real life.
Unfortunately, she
flew too close to the
sun.
66. DOLCÉ & GABBANA
This is the dress. The
novelty of the blingy
iconography is
balanced by the
conservative cut and
the cute mary-janes.
Katy Perry is not
subtle enough to make
this work.
67. GIOVANNA
BATTAGLIA
Giovanna Battaglia is some
kind of European fashion
editor, and regularly
photographed by The
Sartorialist et al., so she
knows what she’s doing.
Outrageous as this outfit is, I
think she looks amazing, like
a Russian fairytale princess.
This is what Katy Perry was
aiming for.
68. HEIDI KLUM
It’s rather pathetic to
see Heidi turning up
to events in trashy
bridal-wear.
70. LINDA EVANGELISTA
Okay, this is WAY
TOO LITERAL a
take on the Russian
fairytale princess. Plus
I think her hair is
crimped. You look
ridiculous, Linda!
72. ROSIE HUNTINGTON-
WHITELY
Rosie is dating thuggish
British actor Jason Statham
and I tend to assume
(perhaps unfairly) that he
encourages her to display
no less than 80% of her
upper body on any given
red carpet.
73. SARAH JESSICA PARKER
Again, no one seems
to be looking at SJP,
though she’s
desperately trying to
be a spectacle. It
might be time to take
it down a notch and
aim for ‘chic NY
socialite’ instead of
‘predictably
outlandish main
attraction.’
74. ZACHARY QUINTO
I don’t know if it’s the
outfit or the pose, but
I’m waiting for him to
shout “draw!” and pull
pistols out of his
pockets.
79. ANNE HATHWAY
Given that she’s
growing out a very
short crop, I guess
now is the time to try
blonde hair, if ever.
I miss the old Anne
Hathaway.
80. ANNE HATHWAY
Lately she reminds me
of a young Liza
Minelli, and this dress
totally looks like
something she would
wear.
81. BROOKLYN DECKER
Apart from the
ubiquitous tube-top, I
actually kind of like
this. The classic cut of
the dress and the
natural hair and
sophisticated makeup
balance the potential
weirdness of the
sequinned pattern.
82. CARA DELVIGNE
I wish this didn’t gape
so much (seriously, if
designers stopped
slashing necklines to
the waist, people
wouldn’t need tube
tops), but otherwise
Cara Delvigne has
nailed the punk
theme. Pun intended.
83. CAREY MULLIGAN
Poor Daisy. She looks
nice, but she clearly
wants to be at home
watching her new
husband play the
banjo, or whatever it
is they do with their
evenings.
84. CAROLINE MURPHY
When I picture Caroline
Murphy, it’s in Tiffany
advertisements, and she’s
usually wearing a beige
cashmere coat and standing in
Central Park while a
superfluously handsome man
hands her a diamond ring. Not
flashing her Spanx in a frou
frou black dress with ostrich
feather trim.
85. CHLOE SEVIGNY
I have an irrational
hatred of Chloe
Sevigny. It’s almost a
phobia. The turban
and the scowl do not
help. Also, the dress
looks ripped above the
bust, and I can see her
underwear. People
need to stop flashing
their underwear.
86. DOKATA FANNING
Dakota Fanning is one
of those girls who was
adorable (if
precocious) when
little, but as an adult
doesn’t really fit
anywhere in
Hollywood. This
frock should be risqué,
but it’s just bland.
89. EMILY BLUNT
A potentially chic
dress, but the gap at
the bust looks
unintentional. Also
her hair and makeup
make her look like a
manic cross-eyed
clown, which I’m sure
is not the look she was
going for.
91. EMMA WATSON
I know she’s trying to
shed the Hermione
Granger thing, but I’m
weary of seeing Emma
Watson in revealing
black gowns with her
hair slicked back.
92. FLORENCE WELCH
I’m pretty sure
Florence Welch just
opens her wardrobe
before any event, with
any dress code, and
says to herself “which
drapey Wiccan-
inspired floor-length
black gown will I wear
tonight?”
93. GISELE BUNDCHEN
I can’t stand this
woman. That chain
mail stuff is totally
transparent. I’m not
including a close-up.
94. GWEN STEFANI
The formal punk
theme of the evening
is right up Gwen
Stefani’s avenue, and
while I don’t love the
giant starchy bow, she
looks better than most
would in this.
95. JESSICA ALBA
Once again, Jessica
Alba turns up to an
A-list event despite
not having made a
decent film since
(insert decent Jessica
Alba film here). I’d
prefer this without the
boob-and-ab-windows.
96. JESSICA HART
I like the concept of the flowy
black skirt, but the bodice is too
small, and too trashy.
I can’t not mention the person
in the background who appears
to be in a transitional state
between normal underwear-clad
woman and fluorescent yellow
mermaid.
97. JOAN SMALLS
Is Joan Smalls a model? I
don’t think her dress is
lined. The sheer trend is
getting tiresome.
98. MIRANDA KERR
Despite being extremely slim
and very beautiful, Miranda
Kerr usually dresses sensibly
and elegantly. Unfortunately
for this event she appears to
have put a racer-back dress on
backwards and then (like a lot
of other people) thrown a tube
top under it for modesty. Do
people just purchase them by
the dozen from Supré? I expect
better, Miranda!
99. NIKKI MINAJ
She looks dazed. I assume
she has been hypnotised;
otherwise this is
inexplicable.
101. RITA ORA
I don’t totally know who Rita
Ora is, except that she keeps
turning up in ‘Worst Dressed’
lists. I actually think she looks
quite lovely here.
104. BELLA HEATHCOTE
I don’t really know who Bella
Heathcote is, but I think she’s
Australian, and she keeps
turning up at things. She looks
like she just stepped out of a
Jane Austen novel, and because
I’m not a huge fan of punk, and
because she looks so quaint, I
kind of like this.
105. CHELSEA CLINTON
Understated but pretty.
(Did we really expect her
to turn up in a leather
bustier with safety pins
in her ears?)
108. JENNIFER LAWRENCE
Jlaw looks depressed, like she’s
attending a fancy mafia funeral.
I get what she’s aiming for here
with the ballet-length Dior
dress, and it would probably
look great on Marion Cotillard,
but it just doesn’t suit Jennifer’s
personality. Additionally, she’s
sort of broad-shouldered, and
the strapless gowns she prefers
tend to make her look top-
heavy. Lighten up, Jennifer!
109. JULIANNE MOORE
Why is EVERYONE
wearing severe updos? I don’t
like this dress, but it might
have been pretty with long,
loose hair or an asymmetrical
1920’s wavy bob.
110. KAREN ELSON
The dress is lovely in a
relaxed way. I wish her hair
was more special.
111. KARLIE KLOSS
Karlie was recently the
subject of controversy when
she appeared in a Victoria’s
Secret catalogue with
BOBBED. HAIR. There was
an outcry. Apparently the
American patriots who shop
at VS like their models with
voluminous, wavy hair
extensions,
thankyouverymuch.
I thought she looked cute. I
actually kind of like this
frock, too.
112. KATE MARA
I can see what The Lesser
Mara was going for here, and
I love the colour of the
bodice, but it just eliminates
her waist. The whole look is
probably more appropriate
for a less formal occasion.
113. KATE UPTON
Kate Upton, I gather, poses
in swimsuits a lot. This frock
is pretty much a swimsuit in
dress form. In other words, it
would be lovely for a classy
Californian pool party.
114. LILY ALDRIDGE
For a casually chic dress, this
passes muster (I seriously
almost wrote “passes
mustard.”) The yellow is a
little non-descript for me, but
it’s fine.
115. MAGGIE GYLLENHAAL
A lot of people online seemed
to approve of this, but I think
she looks truly dreadful. The
dress itself is probably fine,
but she needs some support
in the bust, and her haircut
is ageing and so unflattering.
(Did you ever watch her in
‘Nanny McPhee?’ She was
just adorable).
116. MARION COTILLARD
I have a Marion Cottillard
bias. She’s so pretty and
stylish and FRENCH that I
tend to approve of
everything she wears.
Honestly I don’t like this.
The hint of yellow with pale
pink is unexpectedly lovely,
and I like the shoes, but the
lopsided skirt and the peach
bodice is a little too
uncoordinated. A+ for hair
and makeup.
117. MEGAN SALT and NANCY
CHILTON
I have no idea who these
people are. I just think the
one in the knee-length silk
dress and fur jacket looks
effortlessly chic. That’s the
way to dress for a big event
when you’re not a very
famous person.
119. MICHELLE WILLIAMS
I don’t think Michele
Williams’ legs are her best
feature. Frankly, she has
chicken legs. However, she
looks fine here, if boring.
There are a lot of pointy
black t-strap shoes tonight,
no? You know I love a
nostalgic shoe.
120. MINDY KALING
Americans find Mindy
Kaling hilarious and
intelligent, but I’ve been
watching her show and I’m
not getting it. This looks like
a high school prom photo.
123. KYLIE MINOGUE
I don’t know exactly where
Kylie Minogue belongs these
days, but I’m pretty sure it’s
not here.
124. KIMYE
Good grief, you two, go
home. Put something on
that’s made of jersey, watch
reruns of Friends and eat
toast.
125. STACY KIEBLER
What is the sound of one
hand clapping? If a tree falls
in the forest, would you hear
it? What is a Stacy Kiebler
without a George Clooney?
A riddle for the ages.
127. JOELY RICHARDSON,
DAISY BEVAN and
VANESSA REDGRAVE
I know I already put these
three in the colour section,
but I think they deserve to be
here too. They just look
bright and joyful and
interesting. Daisy is beautiful
in a pre-raphaelite way, and
her take on punk is elegant
and pretty. I love her shoes.
128. ANNA WINTOUR
I have to admit, The Ice
Queen looks like a summer
meadow. She tends to stick to
the same neatly groomed,
ladylike formula, but it works
for her. I even have a
grudging respect for her
immortal bob, which I
assume is lowered into her
head every morning like
Darth Vader’s helmet.
129. BEE SHAFFER
Bee looks lovely too. On
someone else I might have
found this bridal, but Bee is
so pretty and normal-looking
that I think she looks radiant
and youthful, which was
refreshing at this event.
130. BEE & MUMMY
Funny that both eschwed the
punk theme. It worked in
their favour.
131. CHANEL IMAN
I couldn’t get a good picture
of this from the front, but it
seems striking without being
garish.
132. DIANE KRUGER
I couldn’t get a decent picture
of this either, but it looks
chic, flattering and timeless.
134. EMILIA CLARKE
Miley Cyrus wishes she
looked like this. The frock
may not be revolutionary,
but it fits beautifully, her
hair and makeup are pretty,
and the earring is a suitably
subtle nod to the theme.
135. HAILEE STEINFELD
Apparently this is made of
leather, and the sequins are
actually safety pins! Props to
Hailee for incorporating
iconic punk materials into a
demure and age-appropriate
frock. I don’t love her hair
and makeup (I think she was
going for an 80’s vibe), but
I’m willing to overlook that.
Also, when asked to cite her
favourite punk artist she said
“Avril Lavigne,” which is
pretty cute.
136. ASHLEY MADEKWE
Ashley Madekwe is the one
in the middle. I have no idea
who she is, but I think she
looks gorgeous, and the
sequinned pattern on the
dress is very Art Deco (that
would have been a better
theme for the gala, wouldn’t
it?) Her hair is cute, too – a
nice change from the hair-
gelled updos on
everyone else.
137. MINKA KELLY
This may prove
controversial, but I kind of
love this. I think I wanted to
look exactly like this
between the ages of 14 and 18
– sort of a cross between
Princess Leia and The Lady
of Shalott. I don’t love the
empty space down the centre
of the bodice - it looks
accidental. Otherwise, I
think she looks interesting
and unique.
138. NORA ZEHETNER
I’ve seen Nora in a couple of
things, but I still can never
quite place her. However,
Marchesa’s take on an Indian
sari is very pretty, and again,
it’s nice to see someone
wearing something unique but
not downright outrageous.
139. ZHANG ZIYI
Hi, Zhang Ziyi! Where have
you been? We’ve seen this
exact dress dozens of times
before, but she’s so lovely I
can’t fault her.
140. ZOOEY DESCHANEL
This dress is SEERSUCKER
of all things. And I love it.
(I’m aware that I’m in the
minority). I want to wear it
on a yacht on the Riviera. So
cottony and fresh, like a
grown-up sundress. It suits
Zooey’s personality
perfectly, and it’s
adventurous and whimsical
without being ridiculous.
Also, her purse has a safety
pin on it; an ironic nod
to punk.
142. ZOOEY DESCHANEL
Zooey’s fringe is so iconic it’s
shocking to see her without.
She looks lovely, and more
mature, but she needs work on
her brows. When you have a
fringe, it’s easy to forget about
your brows, and I’m guessing
Zooey didn’t quite know what
to do with hers. She needs a
makeup artist who knows how
create a flattering arch.
143. CAMERON DIAZ
This belt looks dangerous.
Literally dangerous. She’d
better not hug anyone.
144. EMMY ROSSUM
The makeup at this event was
predictably extreme. A lot of
people went overboard with
the smoky eyeshadow. Emmy
looks like Cleopatra, and not in
a good way. Her hair appears
to have been done the night
before and then slept in.
145. GINNIFER GOODWIN
I hope this is the peak of
Ginnifer Goodwin’s
experiment with avante-garde
personal styling. In Mona Lisa
Smile, her character regards
herself as plain. Subsequently,
I’ve formed a theory that
Ginnifer thinks she’s
unattractive in real life, and
has therefore decided to be
edgy and artistic instead. In
fact she’s really pretty, and I
wish she’d just go with that.
146. GIOVANNA BATTAGLIA
This is so eccentric and
elaborate, it shouldn’t work.
But because of her personal
style, beautiful face and
European colouring, she carries
it off. She looks like
Frida Kahlo.
147. JAIME KING
Does she or does she not
resemble Dakota Fanning?!?
I had to look twice. I think the
dramatically side-swept hair
with the lopsided crown and
the high lace neckline is all
crowding her face. Too much
clutter, too many competing
angles. She should have picked
just one of these three features
to focus on.
148. JENNIFER MORRISON
Oh my. I think I can see actual
stitching, and why is her hair
all powdery? She could have at
least had the roots touched up.
150. JESSICA PARÉ
With her dramatic features
and great bone structure,
Jessica Paré can pull off some
bold makeup, and I don’t
object to people having fun
with eye shadow of Elizabeth-
Taylor-esque proportions, but
this look is too heavy, and it
actually detracts from the
beauty of her eyes.
151. KATIE HOLMES
I kind of admire Katie Holmes
since she fled the world’s most
nefarious cult and its deranged
spokesperson with custody of
her daughter, so I might be
biased. But her face looks
lovely here. She models for
Bobbi Brown now, and I love
her line of makeup, so maybe
she has taken Katie in hand.
152. KRISTEN STEWART
Do you think she used
Brylcreem for this slicked-back
androgynous do? It’s very
West Side Story. Can you tell
I don’t like it? The makeup is
too much, too. She should be
in her element with a counter-
culture theme, but she looks
like she’s been styled by
someone else.
153. LILY COLE
I think she has actual
bubblegum stuck in her hair.
There must be authentic punks
out there looking at some of
these pictures and groaning.
154. LILY COLLINS
This is possibly the worst
makeup of the evening. Lily
has amazing eyebrows.
Overdoing her most famous
feature was a mistake. She
could have skipped the weird
brow-effect and still
looked edgy.
158. MINKA KELLY
The matte ivory skin and plum
lipstick are very 1990’s, but it
works. If I was writing for a
cheesy teen magazine, I’d say
something like “at an event
where most attendees opted for
dramatic eye makeup, Minka
proves that a pretty face is
your best accessory!”
159. ROONEY MARA
Been there, done that. Rooney
looks like she’s wearing
foundation and powder a
couple of shades paler than her
natural skintone. This is what
I would look like if
cryogenically frozen.
160. SARAH JESSICA PARKER
The ageing Vegas showgirl
look isn’t working for you,
SJP. The headdress is
utterly ridiculous.
