The document discusses strategies for motivating children academically. It suggests using rewards for short-term tasks but establishing long-term expectations, like maintaining a GPA, for privileges. Routines like a dedicated homework space and time are important. Praise effort over intelligence to build motivation. Seek outside help if the parent-child relationship suffers from a focus on grades.
2. What’s Fueling Our Anxiety?
Worried about the future:
2005 UVA average incoming
GPA 3.7
In 2013, UVA average
incoming GPA 4.21
There is a trickle down
effect to grades
We swoop in, pay for
grades, punish
Relationships are defined
by academics
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3. What the Research Says
6.3 Million dollars
261 Schools in NYC, DC,
Chicago, Dallas
Paid students for:
Report card grades
Reading books
Going to class
Completing HW
Standardized test scores
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4. Why Carrots Sometimes Work
Rewards
Work for short-term,
simple tasks
Do not work for
complex, long-term
tasks
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5. Establishing Expectations: Daily
Use the “When, then”
approach”
“When you have studied
for 20 minutes, then you
can take the car up to the
store.”
“I’ll know your
responsible when I see
that you’ve completed
your spelling. Then you
can play outside.”
Consider a formal
agreement
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7. Establishing Routines: Long-Term
Younger:
“When you’ve shown me your
assignment notebook and
completed HW, Mon-Thur, then
you can go out with your friends”.
Older:
When you maintain a 3.0 GPA then
you may have use of the family car.
Bar should be set low to ensure
success
Put in writing
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8. Consequences
Use the SOS technique
Schedule a time to meet
Open the dialogue
Set up accountability
Avoid taking away
activities such as sports
or clubs
Allow natural
consequences to occur
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9. Getting From Here to There
Be realistic about expectations
Success is the motivating factor
No quick fixes
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10. Make the Environment Ripe for
Learning
Routine for HW
Place
Time to Start
Designated HW Time
Launching Pad
Clean Sweep
www.ectutoring.com/ebooks
Location can vary, not in
bedroom
No Tech Time
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11. Limiting Distractions
The myth of multi-tasking
Music
Never a good idea
Computer
Not good for retention
Television
Really task-switching
In a public place
Reduce open applications
Phones
FOMO
Tech break
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12. Communicating to Motivate
Praise effort every turn
Carol Dweck
Notice your child’s
strengths
“I’ve noticed…”
Mention them often
Spend 15 minutes a
day with the activity
they like
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13. Opportunity to Turn the Tables
80% of feedback
students with ADHD
receive in school is
negative
Opportunity to turn
80/20 around
To be a coach, not a
critic
At home, boys shut
down; girls fight with
their moms
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14. The Push & Pull of Academics
“Do not sacrifice your
parent/child relationship on
the altar of academic
performance.”
Russell Barkley, PhD
When in doubt, get outside
help
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