2. +
Key Words
Nuclear Family – Mother, Father and children living together as a unit
Single Parent Family – Parent with child/children
Re-constituted Family – Where two sets of children become one family when
divorced parents marry each other (step-families)
Adultery – A sexual act between a married person and someone other than their
marriage partner
Civil Partnerships – A legal ceremony giving a homosexual couple the legal rights
as a husband and wife
Cohabitation – Living together without being married
Contraception – Intentionally preventing pregnancy from occurring
Faithfulness – Staying with your marriage partner and having sex only with them
Homosexuality – Sexual attraction to people of the same sex
Pre-marital sex – Sex before marriage
Procreation – Making a new life
Promiscuity – Having sex with more than one partner without commitment
Re-marriage – Marrying again after being divorced from a previous marriage or after
the death of a marriage partner
3. +
Changing attitudes to marriage, divorce, family life and
homosexuality in the UK:
• The UK has become a multi-faith and multi-ethnic society
• People are more tolerant of the views of others
• Christian teachings are no longer taken so seriously by
many people
• The Church is less influential
• Reliable contraception has made sex safer
• There has been a decline in traditional family values
• Women are less dependent on men for money
• Sexual relationship attitudes have become more relaxed
for many people
• Changing roles of men and women have changed the
nature of family life
• More people are cohabiting, less marrying and so divorce
will decline
• Homosexuality is more widely accepted
4. +
Christian attitudes to sex outside of
Marriage
Conservative View Liberal View
Adultery breaks the marriage vow of
faithfulness
If they love each other what‟s wrong if
they plan to marry?
Having loving sexual relations unites a
married couple
Bible teachings are old fashioned and
need to be updated
Promiscuity makes a person vulnerable
to STDs
Jesus said; “Love one another as I
have loved you” so loving relationships
are good
The bible only allows sex between
marriage partners
It is better to cohabit and love than to
be married and hate each other
Children born outside marriage may
have a less stable family life
It‟s better for the couple to get to know
each other to avoid divorce
Adultery, Pre-Marital Sex and Homosexuality
5. +
Muslim attitudes to sex outside
marriage
Adultery;
- “…an evil opening road to other evils”
- E.g. Lying to each other, causes division in families, less loving household for
children, leads to STDs and breaks vows of faithfulness
- Adultery is a serious sin
Pre-Marital Sex;
- Unmarried people must not engage in sex or pre-marital intimacy
- “And say to the believing women that they should…draw their veils over their
bosoms, and not display their beauty except to their husbands…”
- “Say to believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their
modesty: that will make for greater purity for them: and Allah is well
acquainted with all that they do”
- It devalues sex between to two people who are committed (married)
6. +
Christian Attitudes to Divorce
Catholic Church’s View Protestant Church’s View
Jesus said: “Anyone who divorces his
wife and marries another woman
commits adultery against her”
Jesus said: Love one another like I
have loved you” and marriage may
not be the most loving thing
Marriage is a sacrament – a vow is
made that can‟t be broken
The New Testament says; “Anyone
who divorces his wife, except for
marital unfaithfulness, and marries
another woman commits adultery”
A Catholic who got divorced cannot
remarry in a Catholic Church
People make mistakes, and
relationships breakdown
Annulment is permitted God is always ready to forgive sins
People should aim to rebuild their
relationships
With God‟s forgiveness believers may
divorce and find happiness with a
different marriage partner
With God‟s forgiveness, they may find
happiness with their marriage partner
They can sometimes remarry in
Protestant church depending on the
views of the vicar
God is always ready to forgive sins
Annulment can be permitted as long as the couple can prove that;
• They didn‟t understand what they were doing
• They were forced into marriage
• If the marriage was not consummated
• If one of the partners was not baptized
7. +
Muslim attitudes to Divorce
• Marriage in Islam is a religious contract between a man and woman who both
consent: unlike Christianity it is not a sacred contract so is permitted.
• But it is disliked as it is better for the couple and family to try their best to make
the relationship work. It‟s said to be among the things most dislike by Allah.
• However if the relationship is damaging then divorce is better.
• For any reason they want to be divorced, the husband/wife must announce his
intention to divorce three times over the course of three months (the iddah).
During this time the couple must refrain from sexual intercourse to avoid
pregnancy.
• During the „iddah‟ the couple and their family have a chance to seek
reconciliation.
• After this period the couple are free to remarry.
• The husband is still financially responsible for his ex-wife and their children
unless she remarries.
• Divorce is also automatically permitted if;
• One partner leaves Islam
• The husband is absent without contact for a long time
• Long Imprisonment
• Husband refuses to provide for the wife and family
• Inability to carry out sexual intercourse
8. +
Christian Attitudes to Family Life
• All Christians believe that children should be brought up in a family with a mother
and father. They see the family as the basis for society, and children and a gift
from God.
• Christian people have a duty towards their children;
• Provide them with food, clothes etc.
• To love their children and each other
• Teach them how to lead a Christian life and about Christianity
• Encourage them to go to Sunday school, church, be confirmed/baptized
• Children should;
• Obey and respect their parents
• Look after their parents when they are unable to do it themselves
• How the Church helps with Family life…
• Infant baptism – where parents dedicated their child to God and promises to
bring them up in a loving Christian home
• Sunday schools and confirmation/baptism classes are run to help parents
with the Christian teaching & teaching them about right and wrong and
keeping them in the family
• Regular family services, children‟s liturgies to give more Christian education
and allow parents to be at Sunday worship without distraction
• Christian social life provided by youth clubs/cubs/brownies/brigades
• Ministers/Vicars/Priests act as marriage councilors
• Church charities can help with family life
• Church schools where the national curriculum is taught in a Christian
environment
Useful Quotes – “Children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right…Fathers do not exasperate your
children; instead bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. ST PAUL TO THE EPHESIANS
“Honor thy father and mother” 10 COMMANDMENTS
9. Muslim Attitudes to Family Life
• The mother is at the heart of the Muslim family, she is the university to her children, including
teaching them halal (right) and haram (wrong). A Muslim man must look for a good mother for his
children and vice versa. Children should love their mother 3 times more than their father.
• The family is at the heart of the community. Islam teaches that it is half of a Muslim‟s duty to
marry and raise good Muslim children. The children should be taken to Madrasah to learn the
Quran in Arabic. It‟s the father‟s duty to take the boys to the mosque.
• There should be plenty of religious opportunities for religious activities at home as well as in the
mosque (e.g. reading the Quran, praying, fasting, doing good things)
• Children should attend Muslim functions, either with their families or the the mosque to build a
good community spirit.
• Family values are based on the Quran and hadith (sayings/actions of the Prophet Muhammad).
• The Mosque:
• Can provide financial aid from Zakat fund in times of need
• Imam can offer advice on matters of marriage and family life
• The Extended Family:
• The traditional family is an extended one: in not only includes parents and children, but also
grandparents and elderly relatives. Muslims believe that extended families mean greater
stability, continuity, love and support for one another.
• The elderly are treated with dignity, and Muslims consider it an honor and blessing from
Allah to be able to look after elderly relatives. After all it was the elderly that looked after
them when they were young. For Muslims looking after the elderly members of the
family is a sacred action, which should be done with kindness, patience and respect.
10. + Christian Attitudes to Homosexuality
For Homosexuality Against Homosexuality
Homosexuality is a natural state of being
and homosexuals were born and created (by
God) that way
God created man and woman to be in
marriage relationship together
A few churches (Quakers, Methodists) will
give blessing to same-sex partnership
Two same-sex partners can‟t have children
through natural methods
Faithful homosexual relationships are not
ideal, but is better than promiscuity
It‟s not good for society, as it undermines the
family
The Church of England‟s approach
homosexuality sympathetically
Homosexuality is a disorder from which the
Christian can seek God‟s help, they should
remain celibate
The Church should fully accept homosexual
partnerships and welcome homosexuals into
priesthood as Jesus said “Love one
another…”
Paul writes: “…Men committed indecent acts
with other men, and received in themselves
the penalty for the perversion
“Do not lie with a man as you would a
woman. That is detestable.” Leviticus 18:22
“If a man has sex with another man in te
same way as with a woman, they have
committed an abomination, They are
certainly to be put to death.” Leviticus 20:13
11. Muslim Attitudes to Homosexuality
• It is seen as a grave sin (i.e. God will punish one for practicing it)
• In the Quran the story of the „People of Lot” tells us how they were destroyed by Allah
because they practiced homosexuality
• Under Sharia lax (Islamic law) punishments from no physical punishments to death
• A hadith (saying) of the Prophet Muhammad was – “Kill the one that is doing it and also kill
the one that it is being done to”
• In the Quran it says – “Of all creatures do you come unto males, and leave the wives your
Lord created for you? No, but you are people who are transgressing (breaking a moral rule)”
• It is thought to be harmful to the health of the individual and society
• Islam teaches that God will reward those who do good and avoid bad/harmful things
• In Islam someone is not a homosexual until they practice homosexuality
• Just as bad behavior can be nurtured (encouraged by the self, others, society) so can good
behavior. Islam holds the view that it is important for everyone to encourage all to do good
things not bad
• Some say that the Quran is against homosexual „lust‟ not „love‟
• Some Muslims argue that we are all born with weaknesses or disabilities and that life is for
learning to manage them. For example, one might have a weakness for: gambling, greed,
drugs, sex outside of marriage etc. Any of these weaknesses is more harmful than
homosexuality
12. +
Contraception
Reasons for Preventing Pregnancy:
• Want to plan when to have a family
• May be too old or too young
• Becoming pregnant could harm the health of the mother
• A child would not fit in with their current lifestyle
• In the case of a single man, he would not want to be responsible for
a woman‟s pregnancy
• They do not believe they would be good parents e.g.
financial/emotional
• One or both of the partners have a genetically inherited condition
they don‟t want to pass on to a child
There are two forms of contraception:
• True Contraception – a barrier method that
actually stops the egg from being fertilized.
E.g. condom, the pill
• Abortive Contraception – a method that kills
the egg after it has been fertilized. E.g.
morning after pill, coil.
13. Christian Attitudes to Contraception
Christian reasons for NOT using contraceptives;
Catholics and conservative Evangelical Christians believe that every act of sexual intercourse
should be open to the possibility of conception.
They argue that artificial methods of contraception is wrong because;
• They prevent people from fulfilling God‟s command to „Be fruitful and multiply‟
• The purpose of marriage is to have children
• Sex was given by God for procreation (reproduction) and so should always allow for the
possibility of conception
• Contraception has allowed promiscuity which spreads STDs
Instead of using contraceptives, some Christians use the rhythm method or the natural planning
family method - They plan having sex around the woman‟s menstrual cycle and attempt to
predict the times of the cycle when she is not likely to conceive
However, many Catholics themselves disagree with this official teaching of the Catholic Church
on contraception, particularly those in countries which are affected with a high level of AIDS.
Liberal Christian views;
• The Church of England does not see contraception as a sin or going against God‟s plan
• The couple can plan to have a family when they think best, allowing them to strengthen their
relationship
• Children are a blessing from God & need to come into a loving family, one that‟s planned
• True contraceptives are preferred as this prevents the egg from being fertilized and avoids
the possibility of the issues to do with abortion (is having ten or more children responsible?)
14. Muslim Attitudes to Contraception
Some Muslims are completely opposed to it;
• Any form of permanent contraception is forbidden (e.g. sterilization) except for good
medical reasons
• Some Muslims argue that the Quran says: „You should not kill your children for fear of want‟
so don‟t stop what Allah will want to plan for you
• If the wife wants to have a baby, then the husband must not refuse
• Families are the basis of a strong society, having children is an essential part of this.
Preventing pregnancy will go against this.
Other Muslims would allow contraception provided that it is not abortive and is not used by the
couple to avoid having children together;
• Contraception can be used if the life of the mother could be damaged through pregnancy
• Some would believe that if the family – existing children, or the new child – would suffer
materially or physically, then it is justifiable
• „We used to use the withdrawal method at the time of the Prophet Muhammad, peace and
blessings upon him. He heard about this and did not forbid it.‟ Jabir – One of the Prophet‟s
companions
Islamic teachings about the family is very strong and regards it as the ideal environment for
growing up as a Muslim, so children are always seen as a gift from God.
Teachings about contraception are all concerned with the relationship between husband and
wife. Contraception can never be justified in the case of unmarried or adulterous partners.
