Life and Success- Missing Links - Dr Vijay Sardana
The 10 cs
1. The 10 Cs of Ideal Play To Win! Work Culture Learning to Live and Work Efficiently and Accurately
2. COURAGE - The attitudes and behaviors to be "comfortable being uncomfortable," being willing to take risks in spite of our fears of the unknown or of the outcome. CURIOSITY - The ability to "learn how to learn" from all of our experiences, good or bad. This is the key to personal and professional growth. CR EATIVITY - The flexibility and adaptability to "get outside the box," to see things from new perspectives, and to be willing to change the game on the spot. C OLLABORATION - Moving from "me" to "we," to see ourselves as part of a larger whole. Thus not letting our egos dominate our decisions or actions and sabotage the possible synergies that occur from collaboration. This shows up as trust and support. CUSTOMER-CENTEREDNESS - Using the first four attributes to focus our energies on why we're all here - to help our customers get what they want and to feel the way they want to feel. This is the attitude and behavior of serving.
3. CHANGE-READINESS - The attitude and behavior that sees change not as an enemy or a threat, but as an opportunity and a friend. Like the entrepreneur, this attitude acknowledges that within every change there exist new possibilities and new adventures. The posture here is being on our toes ready to adapt to change rather than on our heels in retreat. C HANGE-AGENT ATTITUDE - The attitude and behavior that not only adapts to change, but more importantly, anticipates and create the change. The change-agent, as a leader, creates or catches a positive future vision that he or she passionately believes in and can communicate to others; People follow the change-agent leader not because they have to, but because they want to. COMMITMENT - Behaviors that say "I'll do whatever it takes to be sure that the organization reaches its vision, lives its values, carries out its purpose, and achieves its goals." CONTROL OF SELF - Not focusing on control of others or of events over which we have no control, but rather focusing on being able to control our thinking, our emotions, our behaviors, and thus ourselves. This is about accountability and is the key to making the other nine Cs work. COMMUNITY MEMBERSHIP - The attitude and behavior that allows us to commit to a community of people at work - people who have a common purpose, values, and vision. The community provides the structure, support, and celebration for the growth and development of all of the community members. "I have to do it myself, and I can't do it alone."
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5. Be who you really are. Throughout life, each of us is continuously, yet quietly being confronted by two simple, yet difficult questions -- Who am I? and, why am I here? Looking for and finding answers to these profound questions has historically been called the “hero’s journey.” The Great Game of Life is the playing field through which you re-discover the hero within. Winning this game gives you a life of more success and fulfillment. The Game begins by viewing our life in a new and different context. We call this “changing the game” or, doing things differently as a result of seeing things differently. Game Change This Way We use the term “ Game ,” not to trivialize life, but as a metaphor. Like all games, life has a beginning, an end, goals, participants, challenges, random events, ups and downs, rules, and feedback. Some people seem to be winning the game and some losing it. If you choose to get into this game, “winning and losing” will be re-defined. In the Game you need a powerful and unique vehicle, a metaphorical “car” that you create and learn to drive, so it will take you into your future -- your adventure.
6. Your Future Start with this premise: Each of us has to think ourselves out of our own limitations. This is like a box that is holding us prisoner. But hold it! There is a way to free ourselves. This way is called transformation . Transformation is the equivalent of going from caterpillar to butterfly, but the caterpillar in us is often afraid of being a butterfly. So, most of us need help getting on the transformation road. That’s why we need a new vehicle, the Transformational Empower mobile 3000 (TE-3000), to take us into our future. Start your engine… The Great Game of Life is a journey of discovery and transformation where we learn that our performance -- how we respond to life -- is our potential minus interference . Learning to reduce that interference is the primary game strategy. We become better players as a result of learning to coach ourselves using critical core life competencies . These competencies help us reduce or eliminate the interference to achieve our potential. As you journey through The Great Game of Life you’ll encounter the passages you are destined to grow through. Drive on! INNOCENCE The Great Game of Life starts at birth. A newborn child is filled with wisdom and power. Birth itself is a transformational experience from the spirit state to the human state. This suggests we are not human beings on a spiritual journey , but rather spiritual beings on a human journey . At birth we had unlimited potential, but we were lacking the competencies needed to fulfill our human destinies. We were born dependent and innocent of the experiences of this world. With the gift of life experience comes negative cultural conditioning that interferes with the manifestation of our true potential. The difficulty of overcoming our conditioning creates problems, challenges, and obstacles on our path. Our potential is always contained in our true self -- the self we try to remember and rediscover on our hero’s journey.
7. SELF-CONDITIONING What stops us from accessing our true self ? What creates the most interference to performing at our best? Most often the answer is “conditioning.” The ability to condition ourselves to respond to situations in our life automatically, without having to think, is one of nature’s great gifts. However, it can also be our worst nightmare. We could end up responding to life like the legendary processionary caterpillars. Here’s their story. The way these processionary caterpillars feed is that each caterpillar hooks itself to the one in front and follows its every move. Hooked together, they resemble a snake as they move through the forest. French naturalist Jean Henri Fabre experimented with these caterpillars by putting them in a large flowerpot. He hooked the first caterpillar to the last forming a complete moving circle. He expected them to catch on quickly, but not so. For 7 days and 7 nights, this living, breathing circle continued its activity until the caterpillars died from starvation and exhaustion. Ironically, Fabre had placed food in the center of the circle, but they were not aware of it because they were following tradition, conformity, habit, and “the way it is around here” without questioning the results of their actions. In this case conditioning failed them. As small children, without understanding what was happening, we conditioned ourselves to many beliefs about the world and about ourselves? For the most part, the goal of this conditioning was to protect our lives and health and to teach us the ways of our culture. Some cultural truths we learned as children were self-defeating then and now. We created automatic or conditioned responses that interfere with our reaching our full potentials. Most of these self-defeating responses became our truths -- even though they were not always based on fact. As adults we have the choice to change those self-defeating conditioned responses that are not serving us. We have to learn to think for ourselves, and to re-think our lives. Follow the road to the next point of interest. THE AWAKENING Uh oh! This road into Pity City looks like a scary, depressing road; let’s get off onto a new, more positive road. For most people there are three major reasons or motives for bringing about change in their lives. The first is crisis. It might occur as a result of chemical dependency, a life-threatening illness, divorce, job loss or financial crisis. These all represent wake-up calls: “enough is enough and it’s time for a change.” Here we reach out for our coping skills and hope they will take us in a new and better direction. A second reason people change is through evolution: things are changing around us and eventually we have to adapt to those changes. So, our adapting skills come into play as we move through our lives. The third reason for change is anticipation -- truly the creative process at its best. This is change because we want to, not because we have to. Anticipatory change uses our creative imagination to look to the future and see what’s possible, come back to the present and see what’s normal, and then use the gap between the two to propel ourselves toward that better future. These three change motives awaken and invite us back into The Great Game of Life . This awakened state is not always easy or comfortable. But keep going!
8. SELF-AWARENESS The goal of The Great Game of Life is to support you in living more successfully and becoming more fulfilled. Only you can define success and fulfillment for yourself, and, in order to achieve them, you must first define them. You are “awake,” in a position to begin anew -- to find a new path, a new road. You’re now ready to start the process of creating your future. This requires self-awareness, and self-awareness is all about “conscious” choice. You will consciously choose how you want your life to come out. You’ll start by creating your own triangle of coherence -- defining your life purpose, your core values, your talents, and your vision of a better tomorrow. These tell you where you want to go and what you’ll be like when you get there. There will be plenty of surprises along the way in the form of problems, obstacles, and challenges. So you’ll need the five powerful critical core life competencies to assist you in dealing with these surprises: Learning to Learn, Learning to Choose, Learning to Relate, Learning to Create, and Learning to Integrate. SELF-ACCEPTANCE The most toxic weed in our garden of growth is a belief of unworthiness. It has been a challenge for most of us to fully love and accept ourselves. This irrational attitude makes it difficult -- if not impossible -- to fully love and accept others. There is an antidote to this toxic weed: a new attitude of rational self-acceptance . As a hero on this journey, you’ll discover yourself to be a FHB -- a “fallible human being” -- who, like everyone else on the path, falls down, fails, makes mistakes, and is sometimes wrong. At the same time you’ll discover that you’re a fabulous, exceptional, one-of-a-kind miracle. So in reality we’re all fabulous, fallible human beings . However empowering this insight, it alone is not enough to change a well-entrenched attitude of unworthiness. Your life coaching toolbox contains a scientifically tested Attitude Change Process tool you can use to transform unworthiness or any self-defeating attitude into a new self-developing and self-motivating attitude. The single most powerful game-changing strategy is learning to accept and love who you are -- your true , authentic self . When you do this for yourself, you’re playing a whole new Game . Keep going, it’s getting easier.
9. SELF-DISCLOSURE Growth is usually believed to be a process of adding on, yet you get the most leverage from the more difficult part of growth: letting go of what’s not so. Before your victory of self-acceptance, you probably thought you had to be someone “different” from who you really are in order to be accepted by those who you believed determined your worth. You might have created a mask to hide behind, to hide your true fallible humanness, your vulnerable self. But it’s time to let go of all that is not you. It’s time to learn to feed on a diet of positive and self-affirming thought-food. Every day, every week, and every month you disclose more of yourself by removing more of your mask and letting your true self shine through. You begin to see improved results as you let go to grow . You feel lighter, taller, stronger, more peaceful and serene. At this breakthrough point you’ve learned one of life’s most important secrets: how to take off the mask and disclose your fallible humanness. This is the source of true freedom because there is nothing left to hide. SELF-EXPRESSION The Great Game of Life is about making better choices in order to live a better life through choosing growth over fear. As an awake, aware, alert, and alive player in the Game, you’re creating your future every moment of every day. You’re coaching yourself using the five life competencies to consciously make new, different, and increasingly complex connections. You are connecting the dots of your life experiences to your triangle of coherence . You’re “on purpose.” You know your life is making a difference because you’re helping to create a better world. You make the right choice to creatively express yourself every day. And that means expressing your whole self: your true, authentic, unique, fallible self. Now you see the whole picture as well as all the parts. You’re a hero who now supports others on their journeys. SELF-FULFILLMENT At each passage of the hero’s journey, you have been reducing the interference in order to reach your full potential. Through increased awareness and changes of thought-habits, you have reclaimed the power that has always been within you. Now, you are fully connected to your true self and are fully accessing your true potential. You’re on purpose and doing what you came here to do. Your “being” and “doing” is easy now -- free flowing, natural, unrestricted with little interference. You have discovered many positive truths: that separateness is only an illusion and that you have access to the potential of the “whole” universe (whole, meaning all things are integrated and connected). When the illusion of separation is gone, the interference dissolves. You discovered that you now have access to all with which you are connected. You have become the archetype called the “magician.” The magic is in fact the natural birthright of every self-fulfilled human being. Congratulations, you’ve just crossed the winner’s line in The Great Game of Life. Find out more about what’s in store for you on this exciting journey into your future.