Part 2
   Learning Confidence and
Responsibility within the Familiy
The Family-Home
                     - Reflecting God‘s character -

                               Guidance with
           God’s             loving discipline        Psalm 32:9
 loving discipline                                    2 Samuel 17:14-15

                          Learning confidence
           God’s           and responsibility
        guidance
                                            Example   Psalm 32:8
  and instruction                          Teaching
                                              Rules
                                      Encouragement
                                            Rewards


           God’s                                      1 John 4:8
unconditional love         A strong foundation
                           of love and healthy
                                                      Romans 5:5+8
                               relationships
ACT to fill the emotional tank

    •   Attention
    •   Creativity
    •   Time
Group discussion

 Which values are important for your children?

 - What should they learn at home?
 - How do you want to influence your children?
 - What do you want to pass on to them?
Important educational goals
• Honesty                      • Good self esteem
• Reliability                  • Self control
• Tidiness                     • Obedience
• Money management             • Sexual purity

• Ability to sustain good relationships
• Ability to accept correction
• Ability to solve conflicts
• Ability to make good decisions

• Respect of property
• Respect for people
The supreme goal for our child-rearing

 Guidance to an ever-increasing
 self-reliance and self-responsibility.

 This means that children develop their own values
 and are able to independently and responsibly make
 good decisions before God.
Parental control and self-control
Teach them diligently...
“And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart
 and with all your soul and with all your might.
 And these words, which I am commanding you today,
 shall be on your heart; and you shall teach them
 diligently to your sons and talk of them
 when you sit in your house
 and when you walk by the way
 and when you lie down and when you rise up.“
 Deuteronomy 6:5-7, NAS
Teach them diligently
                    Deuteronomy 6:5-7

•   Parents bear the main responsibility.
•   Biblical teaching is a commandment of God.
•   It is an active training and learning in the Laws of God.
•   No strict drilling.
•   Parents have to live it - be an example.
Train your child . . .

“Train a child in the way he should go,
  and when he is old he will not turn from it.”
                                             Proverbs 22:6 NIV

“Train” (hanak) has the meaning of: educate, guide, train.
“In the way he should go” means:
                 according to his inclination or character.
Train your child . . .

  “Train a child in the way he should go,
   and when he is old he will not turn from it.”
                               Proverbs 22:6 NIV
A more precise translation:
  “Train a child according to his inclinations /
    characteristics and he will not turn away
   from the direction even when he grows older.”
Every child is unique

“For you created my inmost being;
 you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
 I praise you because I am fearfully and
 wonderfully made.”
                               Psalm 139:13-14
Green, Yellow or Red ?
The particular abilities and limitations of a child can
be compared to the three colors of a traffic light.
The green light
symbolizes the ability of a child. In this area
he is motivated, has success, and is happy.
The yellow and red lights
stand for his limited talents.
In the yellow area he can keep up, but is only average.
Red areas are where he has neither success nor enjoyment.
Learning from God, the Father
• He is our example
  “Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live
   a life of love.” Eph 5:1
• The Bible is full of encouragement
  “You are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased!” Luke 3:22
• What about rewards in the Bible?
  “The law of the Lord is perfect…, in keeping them there is great reward.”
  Psalm 19:7+11

• In God‘s Kingdom there are „Family rules
     - think of the 10 commandments or the Sermon on the Mount
Rewards make learning more enjoyable
  • Do not overvalue rewards and do not use them
    for too long.
  • Use them, if a child is fighting with himself and
    needs encouragement in learning a new behaviour.
  • Choose rewards according to your child’s interests,

    even let him choose one, but:
     – Do not give big rewards for small tasks.
     – Avoid using money.
     – Do not give rewards for the daily tasks.
Guiding a child


                 Encouragement
                 Encouragement
                 Encouragement
Criticism        Encouragement




            1C= 4E
My daily list
My weekly list

Part 2 folio

  • 1.
    Part 2 Learning Confidence and Responsibility within the Familiy
  • 2.
    The Family-Home - Reflecting God‘s character - Guidance with God’s loving discipline Psalm 32:9 loving discipline 2 Samuel 17:14-15 Learning confidence God’s and responsibility guidance Example Psalm 32:8 and instruction Teaching Rules Encouragement Rewards God’s 1 John 4:8 unconditional love A strong foundation of love and healthy Romans 5:5+8 relationships
  • 3.
    ACT to fillthe emotional tank • Attention • Creativity • Time
  • 4.
    Group discussion Whichvalues are important for your children? - What should they learn at home? - How do you want to influence your children? - What do you want to pass on to them?
  • 5.
    Important educational goals •Honesty • Good self esteem • Reliability • Self control • Tidiness • Obedience • Money management • Sexual purity • Ability to sustain good relationships • Ability to accept correction • Ability to solve conflicts • Ability to make good decisions • Respect of property • Respect for people
  • 6.
    The supreme goalfor our child-rearing Guidance to an ever-increasing self-reliance and self-responsibility. This means that children develop their own values and are able to independently and responsibly make good decisions before God.
  • 7.
  • 8.
    Teach them diligently... “Andyou shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart; and you shall teach them diligently to your sons and talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up.“ Deuteronomy 6:5-7, NAS
  • 9.
    Teach them diligently Deuteronomy 6:5-7 • Parents bear the main responsibility. • Biblical teaching is a commandment of God. • It is an active training and learning in the Laws of God. • No strict drilling. • Parents have to live it - be an example.
  • 10.
    Train your child. . . “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” Proverbs 22:6 NIV “Train” (hanak) has the meaning of: educate, guide, train. “In the way he should go” means: according to his inclination or character.
  • 11.
    Train your child. . . “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” Proverbs 22:6 NIV A more precise translation: “Train a child according to his inclinations / characteristics and he will not turn away from the direction even when he grows older.”
  • 12.
    Every child isunique “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” Psalm 139:13-14
  • 13.
    Green, Yellow orRed ? The particular abilities and limitations of a child can be compared to the three colors of a traffic light. The green light symbolizes the ability of a child. In this area he is motivated, has success, and is happy. The yellow and red lights stand for his limited talents. In the yellow area he can keep up, but is only average. Red areas are where he has neither success nor enjoyment.
  • 15.
    Learning from God,the Father • He is our example “Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love.” Eph 5:1 • The Bible is full of encouragement “You are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased!” Luke 3:22 • What about rewards in the Bible? “The law of the Lord is perfect…, in keeping them there is great reward.” Psalm 19:7+11 • In God‘s Kingdom there are „Family rules - think of the 10 commandments or the Sermon on the Mount
  • 16.
    Rewards make learningmore enjoyable • Do not overvalue rewards and do not use them for too long. • Use them, if a child is fighting with himself and needs encouragement in learning a new behaviour. • Choose rewards according to your child’s interests, even let him choose one, but: – Do not give big rewards for small tasks. – Avoid using money. – Do not give rewards for the daily tasks.
  • 17.
    Guiding a child Encouragement Encouragement Encouragement Criticism Encouragement 1C= 4E
  • 19.
  • 20.