Roy tries to do a good deed by surprising Sarah at work with flowers and chocolates on Valentine's Day to make her feel special. However, his gift causes Sarah to choke on her food. Roy performs the Heimlich maneuver to save her but they are discovered in a compromising position by Sarah's boyfriend Andy. Andy believes Roy and Sarah were having an affair and ends their relationship. Sarah then slaps Roy for ruining her romance. Though Roy meant well with his gesture, it ended up having unintended negative consequences.

1. NO GOOD DEEDS
Created by Julia Anne Wight
"Valentine's Day"
Written by Matt Brunhofer
Matthew Brunhofer
mmbrunhofer@fullsail.edu
(571) 575-6158
Copyright 2015 - Full Sail University

2. NO GOOD DEEDS
“Valentine’s Day”
ACT ONE
EXT. BANANA SUPPORT CENTER - ESTABLISHING SHOT - DAY
A CRINKLING WRAPPER breaks the afternoon calm.
INT. BANANA SUPPORT CENTER - DAY
Valentine’s Day decoration cover the office.
ROY works at his desk. A WRAPPER CRINKLES again.
ERNEST (V.O.)
Emily Levine once said, “While
analogies are useful, however, they
can be misleading. They smuggle in
assumptions that can be wrong.”
Roy turns to DONALD, who leans on Roy’s cubicle wall. A
WRAPPER CRINKLES as he picks from a box of chocolates.
DONALD
We still on for lunch?
ROY
Are you going to be hungry?
DONALD
It’s Valentine’s day. I’ll eat
anything.
Donald wiggles his tongue. Roy grimaces and turns back.
ERNEST appears beside Roy.
DONALD (CONT’D)
So who’s the lucky lady tonight?
ROY
No one this year.
DONALD
Again?
ERNEST
Again...

3. Someone SNEEZES. The three guys spy on SARAH (late 20s), a
heavy nerdy girl, who works at the assistant’s desk.
DONALD
I’m pretty sure she’s free tonight.
ROY
And why’s that?
DONALD
Chubby chicks are always lonely. A
hot date with a guy, like yourself,
would make her day. Add some
flowers and chocolates and you’ll
highlight her year.
(beat)
Remember, Café for lunch.
Donald leaves, and Roy returns to work.
ERNEST
Not a bad idea.
ROY
I’m not going to ask her out.
ERNEST
I’m talking about making her day. A
woman deserves to feel special,
especially on Valentine’s Day.
Roy considers it and grabs his ill-fitted suit jacket from
the back of his chair.
ROY
Rain check on lunch, Donald.
END OF ACT ONE
2.

4. ACT TWO
INT. BANANA SUPPORT CENTER - DAY
Roy enters with a bouquet of fake roses and a box of sugar-
free chocolates.
The office is empty, except for Sarah at her desk. She has
headphones as she reads a magazine and eats a sandwich.
Ernest appears and examines Roy’s gifts.
ERNEST
Artificial and artificial.
ROY
They were out of the real stuff.
ERNEST
It’s the thought that counts.
Roy pulls out a folded piece of paper.
ERNEST (CONT’D)
Got a plan?
ROY
Present the gifts and read this
note about why she deserves to feel
special.
ERNEST
Very nice. Did you include your
name in it?
ROY
Yes, Pop, I included my name.
ERNEST
It’s the key to first impressions.
Roy checks his watch.
ROY
Oh gripes! Lunch is almost over.
Wish me luck.
Roy approaches the assistant’s desk.
END OF ACT TWO
3.

5. ACT THREE
INT. BANANA SUPPORT CENTER - DAY
Sarah takes a big bite out of the sandwich. Roy arrives and
drops the gifts on the desk. Sarah removes her headphones and
goggles at the gifts.
Roy smiles and opens the folded piece of paper.
ROY
“This will make you feel special.”
Sarah laughs and chokes on the bite of food. Her eyes widen.
ROY (CONT’D)
“Valentine’s is a time for smiles
and unconditional love.”
Sarah taps on the desk. She points at Roy and then at her
throat. Roy slaps his forehead.
ROY (CONT’D)
Oh I’m sorry. I forgot to introduce
myself. Let me start over.
Sarah gawks at him and snatches a pen. She writes something.
ROY (CONT’D)
“Sarah. Hello. My name is Roy, and
this will make you feel special.”
Sarah bangs on the desk and holds up a note. It reads: “I’m
Choking!” in illegible scribbles.
Roy squints to read.
ROY (CONT’D)
I’m Cho...Coo...cook...Cooking. Oh
well that’s very nice of you, but
I’m not asking you out.
Sarah groans and tries to give herself the Heimlich.
ROY (CONT’D)
That’s no reason to harm yourself.
Sarah frantically bounces in her chair and performs the
universal sign for choking. Roy’s eyes widen.
ROY (CONT’D)
Razz my berries!
4.

6. Roy shoots behind her and performs the Heimlich maneuver. He
thrusts, and she gags. They stagger, bang into the wall, and
knock contents off the desk.
Roy pulls hard and lifts her into the air. Sarah grunts and
the piece of sandwich POPS out of her mouth. She gasps for
air as they fall forward in the Heimlich position.
Sarah drops to the desk and Roy’s head rests on her back.
ANDY (O.S.)
What’s going on here?
Their eyes snap towards ANDY (30s), a handsome hunk of man,
who holds fake roses and a box of sugar-free chocolates.
ANDY (CONT’D)
Get your hands off my girl.
Roy and Sarah notice their position and release each other.
SARAH
Andy, I can expla--
ANDY (CONT’D)
I came here to surprise you an...
Andy notices Roy’s flowers and chocolates.
ANDY (CONT’D)
Oh. Oh Okay. I see... I thought I
was the only one who knew of your
infatuation with fake roses and
sugar-free chocolates.
Andy glares at Roy and Sarah.
ANDY (CONT’D)
But I guess not... We’re through.
Andy smashes his gifts and storms out. Sarah cries.
Her face contorts with psychotic rage as she pivots to Roy.
Roy’s eyes widen, and Sarah slaps him.
SMASH CUT TO:
TITLE CARD: “NO GOOD DEEDS”
END OF ACT THREE
5.

7. TAG
INT. ROY’S APARTMENT - NIGHT
Roy sits on the couch and eats sugar-free chocolates.
Ernest inspects the fake roses on the table behind the couch.
ERNEST
Look at the bright side.
ROY
Least the flowers didn’t kill her?
ERNEST
No. At least she isn’t the only one
alone tonight.
END OF EPISODE
6.