1. Kingsway Essay
Done by: Sean Phua Aik Han (S4-06)

2. Q4: “Loneliness…”
Write on some occasions when you experienced loneliness

3. Intro - hook
 I slipped in and out of consciousness, the water surrounding me
stained red with my blood. My vision soon became blurry, my
head started to pound against my skull. It would only be a matter
of time before I would be able to leave this horrid place. “Mom,
Dad, I‟m sorry that I had to do this,” Even as I drew closer to the
inevitable grasp of death, I could not help myself but think of my
friends; my family and most importantly, Singapore, my
home……

4. Rising action
 Merely 3 months ago, my application to the Medical Faculty of the National University of
Singapore was rejected. I was distraught, knowing that I could no longer pursue my aspiration
of studying medicine in Singapore. Hence, my parents made the decision to send me to
Melbourne to study medicine. I initially hesitated. Being a shy girl, I was never really able to
adapt to new environments quickly. But after much thought and persuasion, I finally decided to
take the opportunity. I was going to Melbourne.
 I still remember the day I first set foot in Melbourne. The day when I had the largest culture
shock of my life, everything was different. The food, the habits, the customs. Almost everything
that I was seemed out of place. Merely being here made me feel alienated from both my
classmates and the people in this foreign place. I felt like a reject of society. For the first time in
my life, I truly felt lonely. As if nobody cared about me. I missed my family, I missed my friends
and most importantly, I missed Singapore.
 The situation only got worst. I was segregated from the rest of the class, most of them simply
choosing to ignore me. To add injury to insult, some of my classmates were extremely racist
towards me, constantly hurtling racial slurs at me. The insults and loneliness soon became
unbearable and I soon found myself to be unable to concentrate in class. Having no study
partner or friend to confide in, depression soon kicked in. Before I could recover from this state
of mind, I found myself turning towards „cutting‟.
 It started off small. Little cuts that were barely noticeable. Over time, the little cuts accumulated
and grew into countless scars. I donned dark, long-sleeved clothing to school, keeping away
from the crowd. Everyday I would return back to the dorm to add to my „collection‟.

5. Climax
 Then came the day when I broke down. I had my food on the tray, scouring high
and low for a secluded spot in the canteen. When suddenly, a lecturer accidentally
tripped me. The sharp sound of shattering porcelain rung out throughout the
canteen. I swung round expecting an apology but was greeted with a face full of
fury. He proceeded to reprimand me for my carelessness. Then, he made a remark
that I was a „good-for-nothing‟ and that I was a waste of time and effort. At that
moment, I snapped. Storming out of the canteen, I ran back to my dorm, heart
overflowing with emotions.
 Picking up my razor, I locked myself in the toilet. With my mind still unable to forget
the hurtful words, I filled the bathtub with water and stepped in. Before I knew it,
my sleeves were rolled up, the cold steel of the razor sunk into my flesh. I only
wanted to „cut‟ for a bit, but unknowingly, I had already overdone it. I looked down
to what I had done, blood was streaming out of my wrists and arms and into the
water.
 I slipped in and out of consciousness, the water surrounding me stained red with
my blood. My vision soon became blurry, my head started to pound against my
skull. It would only be a matter of time before I would be able to leave this horrid
place. “Mom, Dad, I‟m sorry that I had to do this,” Even as I drew closer to the
inevitable grasp of death, I could not help myself but think of my friends and more
importantly, my family. With a final gasp, I drifted off into the dark abyss……

6. Falling action
 I shot upright, hands grasping around. I looked around at the white walls
surrounding me. The sound of medical equipment beeping echoed throughout
the room. I was definitely alive, and definitely still in Melbourne. Then, I turned
my head and I saw them. My parents moving towards me hastily. Both my
parents anxiously questioned me. My mother was in tears, my father‟s face
was full of noticeable relief. I was at a loss for words. Tears started to streak
down the side of my cheeks, my heart filled with regret and apology.
 Through my parents, I learnt that my room mate had witnessed the whole
event at the canteen and had followed me back to the dorm where she found
me lying unconscious in the bath tub. She called for an ambulance which then
swiftly arrived to send me to the nearest hospital. Furthermore, I had actually
been in coma for the past 3 days!
 And then I realized, all this while, I was never actually truly alone. Even
though many ignored me, there were always some people that were there to
listen to me. I simply allowed the insults and homesickness to get to me. If I
had not blocked everyone out, I may have totally avoided this whole incident
altogether.

7. Conclusion
 Looking back at what happened during my stay in
Melbourne during the past 4 years, I realized how
foolish I had been. If I had been less emotional and
more composed during what happened, I could have
truly, fully enjoyed my studies in Melbourne. Glancing
over to the side of my room, I saw the family photo I
took during my graduation ceremony on my last day in
Melbourne. I could not help myself but smile.