Coming Out of the Work Closet: Expressing Identity at Work

Identity Expression
Coming Out of the
Work Closet
IDENTITYEXPRESSION:COMINGOUTOFTHEWORKCLOSET All Things Open ’19 | Raleigh

coming out of  
the closet,”
““

a method of expressing identity.
coming out of  
the closet,”
““

Hi, I’m Matt.
I’m a designer, I identify as  
a gay or queer man, and I  
use he/him/his pronouns.

Time for a story.

It isn’t always cut and dry.
The fear of “what if,” can be
more than enough.

In 30 states, LGBTQ+
workers aren’t fully
protected under  
the law.

- Fired outright.
The professional + personal risks:
- Passed over for promotions or projects.
- Uncomfortable or unsafe working conditions.

wouldn’t get promoted anymore. It goes against my company values. I’m too afraid to come out at my job. No one cares anyway, it’s not a big dea
People don’t need to know. I’ve lied to my coworkers in the past, so they would stop trusting me if I come out now. It’s just not worth the trouble.
don’t want to lose my job. I would be the only LGBTQ+ person in my office. It’s no one else’s business. I’m worried about too many people
ve been in the closet way to long for me to come out now. I don’t want to make other people feel uncomfortable around me all of the sudden.
There aren’t any laws or rules that would protect me from discrimination in my state. It’s just too personal to talk about that stuff at work.
don’t get upset when people assume my orientation or gender, it’s not worth correcting. It’s a really big risk. I don’t want to have to explain.
want to lose my job. I don’t want it to change my relationship with my coworkers. I try to limit the number of people who know I’m queer
too hard. I don’t want to be treated differently. I keep my work life and my personal life very separate. I don’t really need to, so it’s not worth it.
company is filled with old, white, straight men, that wouldn’t be okay with it. I’m already a minority, I don’t want to double down and make
isk it, given the current political climate in America right now. I’m worried that my clients and coworkers will see me in a different light.
What if I get fired? I don’t have a backup plan. I’ve heard how my coworkers talk about LGBTQ+ people. It would be physically unsafe.
No one would understand how I choose to identify. I don’t want to have to answer a million questions. I don’t want to tell everyone at the same tim
m worried that it would impact my client work. It may scare off business. It just wouldn’t be a safe choice for me and my family for me to be
don’t want to be defined by my orientation. I think people already know, so why make a big deal by talking about it all of the time, honestly.
ll get passed over when it comes to moving up in the company. I don’t really think people need to come out anymore. I don’t know how.
don’t have to explain myself to every new person I meet. I don’t want to be made fun of. It’s not worth the trouble it could cause. It’s been
I’m not sure what protections I do or don’t have. It’s not my job to correct how people think of me. I don’t want things to change, I’m happy.
ike how people treat me when they think I’m straight. I’m comfortable doing things this way. It would affect how my coworkers feel around me.
ve been hiding it for too long. I could lose my job. I don’t think people would care, to be honest. You never know how people will take things.
My company is too conservative and traditional for that. I just let people think whatever they want to think. I work with too man cis men.

But there’s risk to the business
itself when employees hide part of
their identity.

Say that 10% of your  
daily energy goes towards
identity concealment.
productivity

But that adds up to
about 6 weeks of
lost productivity
every year.

communication
- less likely to engage
- avoid people

creativity
- stress + anxiety
- requires vulnerability

collaboration
- needs creativity + communication
- work doesn’t get done well, if at all

So, of course, this isn’t ideal for
everyone, but…

IDENTITYEXPRESSION:COMINGOUTOFTHEWORKCLOSET
Why focus on such  
a small group of people?
All Things Open ’19 | Raleigh

22% people of color
47% female
4.5% queer
6% practicing non-Christian faiths
19% have a disability

It’s not just about one group. It’s
about everyone.

So, what can I do now?

Introduce yourself using your
pronouns.

I’m a designer, I identify myself
as a gay or queer, and I use he/
him/his pronouns.
Hi, I’m Matt.

Look into starting ERGs, or 
employee resource groups.

Don’t touch anyone’s hair. Ever.
(you’d be surprised how many people need  
to be reminded of this)

Accommodate variations in
holidays and scheduling around
religious practices.
(but also around things like medical needs and childcare)

Make menstrual products readily
available.

Have hard conversations. Research,
ask, and discuss. Inaction is
unacceptable.

If you are in the closet at work,
open the door a little.

If you don’t feel like you have a
closet to come out of, make sure
you’re not blocking someone
else’s exit.

Thank you!
https://www.bls.gov | https://www.everydayhealth.com/emotional-health/cognitive-dissonance/how-why-reduce-cognitive-dissonance-you-feel/  
https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/what-happens-to-the-brain-during-cognitive-dissonance1/

Coming Out of the Work Closet: Expressing Identity at Work

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