Giving Effective Feedback

Riverside California Stake
Stake Council Training
Giving Effective Feedback, 11/2016

Leadership in the Church of Jesus
Christ
 The Savior’s Way of
Leading, Handbook II,3.0
 Prepare Spiritually
 Participate in Councils
 Minister to Others
 Teach the Gospel of Jesus
Christ
 Administer the Priesthood
or Auxiliary Organization
 Represent the Lord and His
Church
 Build Unity and Harmony
2
 Prepare Others to be Leaders
& Teachers
 Delegate Responsibility and
Ensure Accountability
 Warn against Sin but Love the
Sinner
 Encourage Reverence
 Prepare Written Agendas for
Meetings
 Plan with a Purpose
 Use Church Resources to
Learn Duties
Riverside California Stake, Nov 2016

Many opportunities for
Feedback…
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 Opportunities for Feedback While Serving:
 Bishoprics
 Elders Quorums
 High Priest Groups
 Ward Aux. Counterparts:
 YM/YW, Relief Society, Sunday School, Primary, etc..
 Various Feedback Opportunities:
 Conducting Personal Priesthood Interviews, Improving
“Come Follow Me” Instruction, Participating in Presidency
Meetings, Observing Various Priesthood Assignments,
Guiding For Strength of Youth Standards, Dealing with
Disruptive Behavior, Situations of Teachers not Teaching
Doctrine, Improving Home & Visiting Teaching, etc..
Giving Effective Feedback
Opportunities to Provide Feedback
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 What’s holding us back?
 We don’t want to offend.
 We don’t know what to say.
 We want to be liked.
 We don’t like conflict.
 We don’t want to make waves.
 Political Correctness - Many have a fear of
making value judgments or correcting
others.
Is Giving Feedback Something we Embrace Freely?
5

What is the doctrine of
giving feedback?

What do we learn from the scriptures?
 Oliver Cowdery: DC 9:7
 Behold, you have not understood; you have supposed that I
would give it unto you, when you took no thought save it was to
ask me.
 Hiram Page: DC 28:11
 And again, thou shalt take thy brother, Hiram Page, abetween
him and thee alone, and tell him that those things which he hath
written from that bstone are not of me and that Satan deceiveth
him;
 DC 121:43
 Reproving betimes with bsharpness, when cmoved upon by the
Holy Ghost; and then showing forth afterwards an increase of
love toward him whom thou hast reproved, lest he esteem thee
to be his enemy;
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 Brother of Jared:
 Ether 2:14 And it came to pass at the end of four years that
the Lord came again unto the brother of Jared, and stood in a
cloud and talked with him. And for the space of three hours did
the Lord talk with the brother of Jared, and chastened him
because he remembered not to call upon the name of the Lord.
 Temple Endowment:
 Reflect on how our Heavenly Father effectively questions and
gets to the heart of a problem and then puts the person(s)
under covenant to change.
 Elder L. Tom Perry:
 “Sometimes silence is not golden, it’s just plain yellow.”
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 To the Saints: D&C 58:26-29
 For behold, it is not meet that I should command in all things; for he that
is acompelled in all things, the same is a bslothful and not a wise
servant; wherefore he receiveth no reward.
 27 Verily I say, men should be aanxiously engaged in a good cause, and
do many things of their own free will, and bring to pass much
righteousness;
 28 For the power is in them, wherein they are aagents unto themselves.
And inasmuch as men do good they shall in nowise lose their breward.
 29 But he that adoeth not anything until he is commanded, and
receiveth a commandment with bdoubtful heart, and keepeth it with
slothfulness, the same is cdamned.
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 Scriptural Examples:
 Nephi (Standing up to Brothers)
 Abinadi (Wicked Priests of King Noah)
 Alma /Amulek (City of Ammonihah)
 Moroni (Raising the Title of Liberty)
 Paul (King Agrippa)
 The Power of Asking Questions:
 543 Questions in the Book of Mormon
 “Have ye inquired of the Lord?”
 “Can ye feel so now?”
 “What would ye that I should do that ye might have light in your
vessels.”
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Giving Effective Feedback - Prior
 How can I effectively prepare to provide
feedback?
 Be prayerful.
 Seek and listen to the Spirit.
 Understand that feedback is a gift.
 Prepare your thoughts and comments.
 Seek first to understand, before being understood.
 Consider your own motives.
 Where is your heart?
 What is your objective?
 What do you hope to accomplish?
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Giving Effective Feedback - Insights
 Helpful Insights While Providing Feedback:
 Separate the behavior from the person.
 Address the behavior that can be changed.
 Deal with specifics, not generalities.
 Share specific insight, observation, and/or counsel.
 Describe the impact of the behavior.
 Teach people correct principles and then let
them govern themselves.” Joseph Smith
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 Providing Feedback – Conversation Flow:
 Make sure the person is ready to receive…
 body language, eye contact, etc…
 Approach the person “one on one”
 Express love, appreciation and gratitude
 If necessary, ask for permission to provide feedback:
 “At the risk of jeopardizing our friendship, can I be honest with you?”
 “Can I share with you something of a sensitive nature?”
 “At the risk of offending you, can I share an important observation?”
 Provide specific feedback.
 Remember, ”Doctrine, Principles, then Application”
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 Providing Feedback – Conversation
Flow:
 Check for understanding:
 Does this make sense?
 Do you see how the doctrine of ________ fits
here?
 Based on our conversation, how do you see this
impacting what you are doing?
 Ask the, “Will you…?” question.
 Gain a commitment to move forward...
 Set a time to follow up with them…
 Reaffirm, love, appreciation and gratitude
Giving Effective Feedback - Continued
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The need for “one on one” ministering
 Our leaders have taught us that, “The purpose of ministering is to help
others become true followers of Jesus Christ.”
 “And the church did meet together oft….to speak one with another
concerning the welfare of their souls.” Moroni 6:5
 “The worth of souls is great in the sight of God.” DC 18
 “wherefore, he that preacheth and he that receiveth, understand one
another, and both are edified and rejoice together.” DC 50
 Here are some important elements as we minister, D&C 43:8-10:
 Instruct – Teach the Doctrine, Principles and Application related to the
subject matter necessitating the feedback.
 Edify – Listen, Inspire, Strengthen and provide Encouragement
 Bind to Act – Invite by asking a “Will You” question, setting up a relationship
of accountability.
 Promised Blessings – Share testimony of the associated blessings that will
come as they are faithful.
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Riverside California Stake
Stake Council Training
Giving Effective Feedback, 11/2016
President Mark E. McKell, 1st Co. Stake Presidency

Giving Effective Feedback

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