Three scripts for Stupendous
By Faith Howley
3 Orchard lane
Chester
WA6 6FG
faith1@gmail.com
INT . SHOPPING CENTRE - DAY
A typical Saturday afternoon at a busy shopping
centre. The centre is filled with Saturday shoppers.
We see the large glass automatic door.
Two men average height dressed in black with
balaclavas covering their face, are in shot stood
with their backs to the wall.
MAN ONE
Right, 'you ready?
MAN TWO
Yeah, come on let's just Go.
MAN ONE
Now? right you go first I'll
follow.
MAN TWO
Okay quick go, it's the first
shop on the left.
The men sneak into the shopping centre creeping with
their backs to the wall.
INT. DRUG/HEALTH STORE - DAY
The men enter through the door They approach the
first aisle. Other shoppers notice them, startled by
their black clothing, and thuggish appearance they
scream. the men grab some items off the shelf.
MAN ONE
Yeah that one there, grab it.
The robbers, have gained the attention of the shop
workers. Everyone is now scared and frozen around the
shop. Everybody is staring at them anticipating their
next move.
MAN TWO
Right now let's get out of
here.
ContinuedCONTINUED
Page 1
The men are surrounded by scared and bemused shoppers
and now the Security Guard, A small slightly overweight
man in his late fifties. Wearing a typical security
uniform with a hat. He is braced and ready to attack
the robbers.
MAN TWO
They've seen us, we're
surrounded!
MAN ONE
Quick that way. Go GO!
They run out of the aisle and through the shop toward
the checkout as the Security Guard is just about to
make a move. The robbers stop running as they get to
the check out and casually walk to the 'queue here'
sign. The shoppers and Security Guard as they fall
silent.
AUTOMATED VOICE
Cashier number three please.
The Men casually walk through barriers in the queue and
get to the checkout, where a terrified and trembling
Young Cashier a small Asian girl in her late teens, is
stood. The baffled security guard approaches.
SECURITY GUARD
Woah woah What are you doing ?
MAN ONE
Oh, what? This?
The Man gestures toward the tube in his hand.
MAN ONE
Yeah.. my acne has really been
playing up, I've been hiding under
this mask for days.
He lifts up his balaclava to reveal a sheepish
teenage boy with acne, glasses and braces.
FADE OUT
Page 2
CONTINUED
FADE IN
EXT. BUS STOP - DAY
Three People are standing at a bus stop, two men,
young professionals, late twenties, dressed in suits.
And a middle aged woman wearing a dress suit she is
of small stature, and holds a briefcase in front of
her with both hands on the handle. Something is
approaching in the distance, it looks small and
distant. Focusing back to the people at the bus stop,
they look bored with an exasperated expression.
A Young Man in his late teen dressed in jeans and a
Blue t-shirt joins the queue, he is smaller than the
other men. He is on his phone with ear phones in. He
walks up and joins the people at the bus stop,
looking up to nod at the suited business man to his
left in acknowledgement.
Now visible is the slowly approaching vehicle coming
closer, becoming visible and showing it is a small
mobility scooter driven by an Elderly Man, Wearing a
tweed jacket and flat cap, with rounded glasses. As
the scooter comes closer a quiet humming noise
becomes apparent. Focusing back to the people still
waiting at the bus stop one of them checks their
watch and sighs impatiently.
We now see the people at the bus stop from the other
side of the road. The scooter comes into shot from
the left side, approaching the people at the bus
stop, they have the same bored emotionless expression
on their faces.
Now the only the only thing visible the people at the
bus stop. A few seconds later they are splashed with
an over exaggerated wave. Looking shocked they stand
there soaked.
Finally we see the elderly man who carries on
driving unfased with a small smirk on his face.
FADE OUT
Page 3
CONTINUED
FADE IN
INT. SUPERMARKET - DAY
A supermarket checkout, A Male Shopper, an average height man
late forties, with greying hair, he is wearing jeans and a t-
shirt approaches the checkout with a basket full of shopping,
he puts his basket down on the self-service and starts to scan
his items.
AUTOMATED VOICE
Welcome, do you have your own
bags?
The male shoppers hands as he taps 'no' on the screen,
the voice on the machine sighs.
AUTOMATED VOICE
Ugh, one of them are we?
The Male Shopper is baffled, but shrugs off the
comment and scans his first item.
AUTOMATED VOICE
Come on hurry up I have places to
be.
Ha low fat yogurt, who are you
trying to kid.
Cheesecake, more like it.
Ahhhh so that's where all the pies
went.
The male shopper looks around to see if anybody else
has noticed the insults, he calls over one of the shop
assistants.
MALE SHOPPER
Excuse me I think there's
something wrong with the machine,
it keeps errm.. insulting me.
Page 4
Page 1
Page 1
CONTINUED
The female shop assistant, A small middle aged woman,
wearing typical supermarket uniform, very curly hair
and round glasses, looks at him patronisingly and
sighs.
FEMALE SHOP ASSISTANT
Erm okay sir, no I don't think
there's anything wrong, there you
go that should be fine.
The Female Shop Assistant's hands as she press's
several buttons on the screen, the man continues to
scan his shopping.
AUTOMATED VOICE
Haha nice try mate.
MALE SHOPPER
SHUT UP.
People look over to the Male Shopper who appears to be
screaming to himself and everyone gives him a bemused
look and whispers to each other.
MALE SHOPPER
RIGHT.
The Male Shopper walks behind the machine unplugs it
and the screen turns black, standing up and brushing
his hands, he walks away unfazed.
AUTOMATED VOICE
Ooohhh someone's touchy.
FADE OUT
Page 5

Comedy sketches master edited

  • 1.
    Three scripts forStupendous By Faith Howley 3 Orchard lane Chester WA6 6FG faith1@gmail.com
  • 2.
    INT . SHOPPINGCENTRE - DAY A typical Saturday afternoon at a busy shopping centre. The centre is filled with Saturday shoppers. We see the large glass automatic door. Two men average height dressed in black with balaclavas covering their face, are in shot stood with their backs to the wall. MAN ONE Right, 'you ready? MAN TWO Yeah, come on let's just Go. MAN ONE Now? right you go first I'll follow. MAN TWO Okay quick go, it's the first shop on the left. The men sneak into the shopping centre creeping with their backs to the wall. INT. DRUG/HEALTH STORE - DAY The men enter through the door They approach the first aisle. Other shoppers notice them, startled by their black clothing, and thuggish appearance they scream. the men grab some items off the shelf. MAN ONE Yeah that one there, grab it. The robbers, have gained the attention of the shop workers. Everyone is now scared and frozen around the shop. Everybody is staring at them anticipating their next move. MAN TWO Right now let's get out of here. ContinuedCONTINUED Page 1
  • 3.
    The men aresurrounded by scared and bemused shoppers and now the Security Guard, A small slightly overweight man in his late fifties. Wearing a typical security uniform with a hat. He is braced and ready to attack the robbers. MAN TWO They've seen us, we're surrounded! MAN ONE Quick that way. Go GO! They run out of the aisle and through the shop toward the checkout as the Security Guard is just about to make a move. The robbers stop running as they get to the check out and casually walk to the 'queue here' sign. The shoppers and Security Guard as they fall silent. AUTOMATED VOICE Cashier number three please. The Men casually walk through barriers in the queue and get to the checkout, where a terrified and trembling Young Cashier a small Asian girl in her late teens, is stood. The baffled security guard approaches. SECURITY GUARD Woah woah What are you doing ? MAN ONE Oh, what? This? The Man gestures toward the tube in his hand. MAN ONE Yeah.. my acne has really been playing up, I've been hiding under this mask for days. He lifts up his balaclava to reveal a sheepish teenage boy with acne, glasses and braces. FADE OUT Page 2 CONTINUED
  • 4.
    FADE IN EXT. BUSSTOP - DAY Three People are standing at a bus stop, two men, young professionals, late twenties, dressed in suits. And a middle aged woman wearing a dress suit she is of small stature, and holds a briefcase in front of her with both hands on the handle. Something is approaching in the distance, it looks small and distant. Focusing back to the people at the bus stop, they look bored with an exasperated expression. A Young Man in his late teen dressed in jeans and a Blue t-shirt joins the queue, he is smaller than the other men. He is on his phone with ear phones in. He walks up and joins the people at the bus stop, looking up to nod at the suited business man to his left in acknowledgement. Now visible is the slowly approaching vehicle coming closer, becoming visible and showing it is a small mobility scooter driven by an Elderly Man, Wearing a tweed jacket and flat cap, with rounded glasses. As the scooter comes closer a quiet humming noise becomes apparent. Focusing back to the people still waiting at the bus stop one of them checks their watch and sighs impatiently. We now see the people at the bus stop from the other side of the road. The scooter comes into shot from the left side, approaching the people at the bus stop, they have the same bored emotionless expression on their faces. Now the only the only thing visible the people at the bus stop. A few seconds later they are splashed with an over exaggerated wave. Looking shocked they stand there soaked. Finally we see the elderly man who carries on driving unfased with a small smirk on his face. FADE OUT Page 3 CONTINUED
  • 5.
    FADE IN INT. SUPERMARKET- DAY A supermarket checkout, A Male Shopper, an average height man late forties, with greying hair, he is wearing jeans and a t- shirt approaches the checkout with a basket full of shopping, he puts his basket down on the self-service and starts to scan his items. AUTOMATED VOICE Welcome, do you have your own bags? The male shoppers hands as he taps 'no' on the screen, the voice on the machine sighs. AUTOMATED VOICE Ugh, one of them are we? The Male Shopper is baffled, but shrugs off the comment and scans his first item. AUTOMATED VOICE Come on hurry up I have places to be. Ha low fat yogurt, who are you trying to kid. Cheesecake, more like it. Ahhhh so that's where all the pies went. The male shopper looks around to see if anybody else has noticed the insults, he calls over one of the shop assistants. MALE SHOPPER Excuse me I think there's something wrong with the machine, it keeps errm.. insulting me. Page 4 Page 1 Page 1 CONTINUED
  • 6.
    The female shopassistant, A small middle aged woman, wearing typical supermarket uniform, very curly hair and round glasses, looks at him patronisingly and sighs. FEMALE SHOP ASSISTANT Erm okay sir, no I don't think there's anything wrong, there you go that should be fine. The Female Shop Assistant's hands as she press's several buttons on the screen, the man continues to scan his shopping. AUTOMATED VOICE Haha nice try mate. MALE SHOPPER SHUT UP. People look over to the Male Shopper who appears to be screaming to himself and everyone gives him a bemused look and whispers to each other. MALE SHOPPER RIGHT. The Male Shopper walks behind the machine unplugs it and the screen turns black, standing up and brushing his hands, he walks away unfazed. AUTOMATED VOICE Ooohhh someone's touchy. FADE OUT Page 5