Becoming a better person

Mihigo ER Anaja author of time and legacy
Becoming a
better person
Mihigo ER Anaja

I
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be
reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, transmitted
in any form, by any means, electronic, mechanical,
photocopying, recording or otherwise, without
written permission of the author.
©2023 by Mihigo ER Anaja

II
Introduction
In the grand tapestry of life, there
exists a universal desire to become
better versions of ourselves. Whether
through self-reflection, personal
development, or the quest for a deeper
understanding of who we are, the pursuit
of self-improvement is a journey we all
embark upon at some point in our lives.
It is a quest as old as humanity itself,
transcending cultural, geographical, and
temporal boundaries.
This book, "Becoming A Better Person" is
a roadmap for those who seek to embark on
this timeless journey of self-improvement
and personal growth. It is a guide that
offers actionable strategies, and a
profound exploration of what it means to
be a better person.
Why does becoming a better person matter?
In a world where we are constantly
bombarded with external pressures and
expectations, it is easy to lose sight of
our true selves. We often find ourselves
caught in the whirlwind of daily routines,
societal norms, and the relentless
pursuit of success, forgetting that the
most important journey is the one within.

III
This book is not a quick fix or a one-
size-fits-all solution. Instead, it is an
invitation to embark on a profound and
transformative adventure; a journey that
requires introspection, self-compassion,
and a commitment to lifelong learning. It
is about embracing your flaws,
controlling your strengths, and making
conscious choices that lead you toward a
more fulfilling and authentic life.
Let's begin this extraordinary journey together.

IV
Table of contents
Introduction............................................................. II
Table of contents................................................... IV
Choose Your Attitude..............................................1
Why Choosing Your Attitude is Important........... 1
1. Controls Your Thoughts.............................. 1
2. Affects Your Emotions.................................2
3. Impacts Your Actions.................................. 2
Choosing Your Attitude....................................... 3
1. Practice Self-Awareness.............................3
2. Re-frame Your Thoughts.............................3
3. Practice Gratitude....................................... 3
Conquering Self-Conflict To Embrace Inner
Harmony And Growth..............................................5
1. Cultivate Self-Awareness................................6
2. Practice Mindfulness.......................................7
3. Identify and Challenge Limiting Beliefs........... 8
4. Practice Self-Compassion...............................9
5. Seek Different Perspectives..........................10
6. Prioritize Self-Reflection and Journaling....... 11
7. Set Clear Goals and Priorities.......................12
8. Seek Professional Support............................13
Cooperation for rapid growth and development....15
1. Sharing knowledge and resources................16
2. Building partnerships.................................... 16
3. Fostering innovation......................................16
4. Achieving common goals.............................. 17
5. Strengthening relationships.......................... 17
Focus on being right rather than being liked......... 18
1. Seek Truth and Knowledge...........................19
2. Embrace Constructive Disagreements..........19
3. Stand Up for Your Convictions......................20
4. Build Authentic Relationships....................... 20

V
5. Focus on Impact and Contribution................ 20
6. Practice Self-Reflection.................................21
Master your mind.................................................. 23
Talk to the author.................................................. 27

1
Choose Your Attitude
Attitude is everything. It's the lens
through which we view the world and
the filter through which we interpret
our experiences. Our attitude can
shape our perceptions, our emotions,
and ultimately, our actions. In this
chapter, we will explore the
importance of choosing your attitude
and how it can impact your life.
Why Choosing Your Attitude is Important
1. Controls Your Thoughts
Your attitude has a direct impact on
your thoughts. If you have a negative

2
attitude, you are more likely to have
negative thoughts. On the other hand,
if you have a positive attitude, you
are more likely to have positive
thoughts. By choosing a positive
attitude, you can control your
thoughts and focus on the good in any
situation.
2. Affects Your Emotions
Your attitude also affects your
emotions. If you have a negative
attitude, you are more likely to feel
sad, angry, or frustrated. Conversely,
if you have a positive attitude, you
are more likely to feel happy, excited,
or content. By choosing a positive
attitude, you can improve your
emotional well-being and overall
happiness.
3. Impacts Your Actions
Finally, your attitude impacts your
actions. If you have a negative
attitude, you are more likely to
engage in negative behaviors, such as
complaining, blaming, or criticizing.
If you have a positive attitude, you
are more likely to engage in positive
behaviors, such as helping others,
taking initiative, and seeking
solutions. By choosing a positive
attitude, you can improve your

3
relationships, productivity, and
success.
Choosing Your Attitude
1. Practice Self-Awareness
The first step in choosing your
attitude is to practice self-awareness.
Pay attention to your thoughts,
emotions, and behaviors. Notice when
you are engaging in negative self-talk
or engaging in negative behaviors.
This awareness will allow you to
identify when you need to make a
conscious effort to choose a positive
attitude.
2. Re-frame Your Thoughts
When you notice negative thoughts, try
to re-frame them into positive ones.
For example, instead of thinking "I'm
not good enough," try thinking "I'm
capable of learning and improving." By
reframing your thoughts, you can shift
your attitude and improve your mood.
3. Practice Gratitude
Practicing gratitude is a powerful way
to choose a positive attitude. Make a
habit of listing things you are
grateful for each day, whether it's a
kind word from a friend or a beautiful

4
sunset. This will help you focus on
the good in your life and cultivate a
positive attitude.
In conclusion, choosing your attitude
is a powerful tool for improving your
life and becoming a better person. By
controlling your thoughts, emotions,
and behaviors, you can improve your
relationships, productivity, and
overall well-being. By practicing
self-awareness, reframing your
thoughts, and practicing gratitude,
you can choose a positive attitude and
live a happier, more fulfilling life.

5
Conquering Self-Conflict To Embrace
Inner Harmony And Growth
Self-conflict, also known as inner
turmoil or internal strife, is a
common experience that many
individuals face. It involves
conflicting thoughts, emotions, or
desires within ourselves, which can
hinder personal growth and cause
distress. However, conquering self-
conflict is not only possible but also
essential for leading a fulfilling and
harmonious life. In this blog post, we
will explore strategies to help you
navigate and conquer self-conflict,

6
fostering inner harmony and
facilitating personal growth.
1. Cultivate Self-Awareness
The first step in conquering self-
conflict is to cultivate self-
awareness. Take time to reflect on
your thoughts, emotions, and values.
Understand what triggers your inner
conflict and identify patterns or
recurring themes. By becoming aware of
your internal landscape, you gain
insights into the root causes of your
conflicts and can begin to address
them more effectively.

7
2. Practice Mindfulness
Mindfulness is a powerful practice for
managing self-conflict. By staying
present in the moment and observing
your thoughts and emotions without
judgment, you can detach yourself from
the intensity of conflicting feelings.
Mindfulness helps you develop a calm
and non-reactive mindset, allowing you
to respond to self-conflict with
clarity and objectivity.

8
3. Identify and Challenge Limiting Beliefs
Self-conflict often arises from
conflicting beliefs or limiting self-
perceptions. Identify any limiting
beliefs that contribute to your
internal turmoil, such as self-doubt
or fear of failure. Challenge these
beliefs by seeking evidence to the
contrary and reframing them in a more
positive and empowering light. Replace
self-limiting thoughts with
affirmations that align with your
goals and aspirations.

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4. Practice Self-Compassion
Self-compassion is essential when
facing self-conflict. Treat yourself
with kindness, understanding, and
acceptance, just as you would a close
friend. Recognize that experiencing
inner conflict is a natural part of
personal growth. Practice self-
forgiveness and let go of past
mistakes or regrets. By fostering
self-compassion, you create a
supportive and nurturing internal
environment, facilitating the
resolution of conflicts.

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5. Seek Different Perspectives
When facing self-conflict, it can be
helpful to seek different perspectives.
Reach out to trusted friends, family
members, or mentors who can provide
objective insights and alternative
viewpoints. Engage in open and honest
conversations that allow you to gain
new insights and challenge your own
assumptions. Embrace diverse
perspectives as opportunities for
personal growth and expanded
understanding.

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6. Prioritize Self-Reflection and Journaling
Regular self-reflection and journaling
can be transformative in conquering
self-conflict. Dedicate time to
introspection, writing down your
thoughts, feelings, and reflections.
Use journaling as a tool for self-
discovery, problem-solving, and
emotional release. By putting your
thoughts on paper, you gain clarity
and perspective, helping to reconcile
conflicting aspects of yourself.

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7. Set Clear Goals and Priorities
Clarity in your goals and priorities
can alleviate self-conflict. Clearly
define what you want to achieve and
set realistic and actionable goals.
Align your actions and decisions with
your values and long-term aspirations.
When faced with internal conflicts,
refer back to your goals and
priorities to guide your decision-
making process and find a path forward.

13
8. Seek Professional Support
If self-conflict persists and
significantly affects your well-being
and daily functioning, consider
seeking professional support. A
therapist, counselor, or life coach
can provide guidance, techniques, and
tools to help you navigate and conquer
self-conflict. They can facilitate
deeper self-exploration and offer
strategies tailored to your specific
needs.
Conquering self-conflict is an ongoing
journey that requires self-awareness,
compassion, and a commitment to

14
personal growth. By cultivating self-
awareness,
practicing mindfulness, challenging
limiting beliefs, fostering self-
compassion, seeking different
perspectives, engaging in self-
reflection, setting clear goals, and
seeking professional support when
needed, you can navigate the
complexities of self-conflict and
foster inner harmony. Embrace the
opportunity for growth and use self-
conflict as a catalyst for personal
transformation. Remember, you have the
power to conquer self-conflict and
create a more harmonious and
fulfilling life.

15
Cooperation for rapid growth and
development
In today's fast-paced world,
cooperation has become increasingly
important for rapid growth and
development. Whether it's in business,
politics, or personal relationships,
working together towards a common goal
can lead to significant progress and
success. In this blog post, we will
explore the importance of cooperation
and how it can contribute to rapid
growth and development.

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1. Sharing knowledge and resources
Cooperation allows individuals and
organizations to share knowledge and
resources. By pooling resources,
individuals and organizations can
achieve more significant results than
they could on their own. For example,
businesses can collaborate to share
expertise, access new markets, and
leverage each other's networks.
2. Building partnerships
Cooperation allows for the development
of partnerships and alliances that can
lead to rapid growth and development.
Partnerships can create new
opportunities and access to resources,
which can help businesses and
organizations expand their reach and
increase their impact.
3. Fostering innovation
Cooperation can foster innovation by
bringing together diverse perspectives
and ideas. Collaborating with
individuals and organizations from
different backgrounds and industries
can lead to breakthroughs and new
ideas that would not have been
possible otherwise.

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4. Achieving common goals
Cooperation allows individuals and
organizations to work together towards
a common goal. This can lead to faster
progress and more significant
achievements than working alone. For
example, governments can work together
to tackle global issues like climate
change and poverty.
5. Strengthening relationships
Cooperation can also strengthen
relationships between individuals and
organizations. By working together
towards a common goal, individuals and
organizations can build trust, respect,
and mutual understanding.
In conclusion, cooperation is
essential for rapid growth and
development in today's interconnected
world. By sharing knowledge and
resources, building partnerships,
fostering innovation, achieving common
goals, and strengthening relationships,
individuals and organizations can
achieve significant progress and
success. Embracing cooperation as a
core value can lead to a more
collaborative and prosperous future.

18
Focus on being right rather than being
liked
In a world where social validation and
likability often take precedence,
there is value in shifting our focus
from seeking approval to pursuing what
is right. Striving for truth and
authenticity, even if it means
challenging popular opinions, can lead
to personal growth, meaningful
relationships, and positive impact. In
this blog post, we will explore the
importance of prioritizing being right
over being liked and provide

19
strategies for embracing authenticity
in our interactions and decisions.
1. Seek Truth and Knowledge
The foundation of being right lies in
seeking truth and expanding our
knowledge. Cultivate a curious and
open mindset, actively seeking out
diverse perspectives and challenging
your own beliefs. Invest time in
research, critical thinking, and fact-
checking to ensure that your opinions
are based on accurate information.
Embrace lifelong learning and be
willing to modify your views in the
face of new evidence.
2. Embrace Constructive Disagreements
Healthy and respectful debates are
essential for intellectual growth.
Engage in constructive discussions
where ideas are exchanged, and
different viewpoints are respected.
Approach disagreements with an open
mind, focusing on understanding the
perspectives of others rather than
winning arguments. Cultivate the
ability to listen actively and
consider alternative viewpoints, even
if they challenge your preconceived
notions.

20
3. Stand Up for Your Convictions
Being right often requires courage and
conviction. Do not shy away from
standing up for your beliefs, even if
they are unpopular. Express your
opinions respectfully and assertively,
backed by sound reasoning and evidence.
Be prepared to defend your positions
while remaining open to constructive
criticism and new information.
Authenticity lies in staying true to
your principles and values, even when
it's challenging.
4. Build Authentic Relationships
Prioritizing being right over being
liked does not mean disregarding the
importance of relationships. Authentic
connections thrive on mutual respect,
trust, and open communication.
Surround yourself with individuals who
appreciate your genuine self, even if
they hold different opinions. Foster
relationships based on shared values,
intellectual stimulation, and a
willingness to challenge and support
one another.
5. Focus on Impact and Contribution
Shifting the focus from being liked to
being right allows you to prioritize

21
making a positive impact in the world.
Direct your energy towards meaningful
contributions that align with your
values and beliefs. Engage in
activities that promote justice,
equality, and personal growth. By
staying true to your principles, you
can inspire others and effect positive
change in your community and beyond.
6. Practice Self-Reflection
Regular self-reflection is essential
for personal growth and authenticity.
Take time to examine your motives,
biases, and areas for improvement. Be
honest with yourself and embrace self-
awareness. Reflect on whether your
actions and decisions align with what
you believe is right, rather than
seeking validation or conformity.
Learn from your mistakes, adapt your
approach, and continually strive to be
a better version of yourself.
Choosing to prioritize being right
over being liked requires courage,
intellectual honesty, and a commitment
to authenticity. By seeking truth,
engaging in respectful debates,
standing up for your convictions,
building authentic relationships,
focusing on impact, and practicing

22
self-reflection, you can embrace your
true self and contribute positively to
the world. Remember that being right
may not always lead to popularity, but
it can lead to personal growth,
meaningful connections, and a sense of
fulfillment in living a life aligned
with your values.

23
Master your mind
Our minds are complex and powerful
instruments that shape our perception of
reality, influence our emotions, and
drive our actions. However, all too often,
we find ourselves at the mercy of our
thoughts and emotions, caught in a cycle
of negativity, self-doubt, and
unproductive patterns. Lets explore the
art of taking control over our minds and
cultivating a state of self-mastery. By
doing so, we can enhance our overall
well-being, achieve personal growth, and
navigate life challenges with clarity and
resilience.
The first step towards mastering your own
mind is cultivating self-awareness.
Become an observer of your thoughts,
emotions, and patterns of behavior.
Notice the impact they have on your well-

24
being and the choices you make. By
developing mindfulness, you can detach
yourself from negative thought patterns
and gain a deeper understanding of your
own mental landscape. By learning from
your own experience, your can improve
your perfection as a human and avoid
repeating the same mistakes.
Emotions are an integral part of the
human experience, but they can sometimes
cloud our judgment and hinder our
progress. Developing emotional
intelligence and regulation skills allows
us to navigate our emotions with clarity
and composure. Practice techniques such
as deep breathing, self-interviewing and
journaling to manage and understand your
emotions better. By doing so, you can
respond to challenging situations in a
more balanced and constructive manner.
Self-discipline is a vital aspect of
mastering your mind. It involves setting
goals, establishing healthy habits, and
making consistent efforts towards
personal growth. Practice self-discipline
by creating routines, setting realistic
expectations, and staying committed to
your chosen path. Remember that self-
discipline is a skill that can be
cultivated over time, and every clap
counts in this journey. Choosing your

25
attitude is a powerful tool for improving
your life. By controlling your thoughts,
emotions, and behaviors, you can improve
your relationships, productivity, and
overall well-being. By practicing self-
awareness, understanding your thoughts,
and practicing gratitude, you can choose
a positive attitude and live a more
fulfilling life.
A positive mindset is a powerful tool for
self-mastery. Choose to focus on
gratitude, optimism, and possibilities
rather than dwelling on negativity or
limitations. Surround yourself with
positive influences, practice
affirmations, and engage in activities
that uplift your spirit. By consciously
shifting your mindset towards positivity,
you can rewire your brain and cultivate a
more resilient and optimistic outlook on
life. Make self-care a priority by
engaging in activities that rejuvenate
and nourish you. Remember that self-
care(self-compassion) is not selfishness
but rather a foundation for maintaining
mental clarity and overall well-being.
Self-confidence is a crucial aspect of
personal development that can have a
significant impact on various areas of
your life. When you have confidence in
yourself and your abilities, you're more

26
likely to take risks, pursue your goals,
and overcome obstacles. You need to
consider your failure as a learning
opportunity rather than being a setback.
When you fail, take the time to reflect
on what went wrong and what you can do
differently next time. Self-mastery is an
ongoing journey of learning and growth,
it involves failure and learning from
your own mistakes. Embrace change, step
out of your comfort zone, and adopt a
growth mindset that views challenges as
learning opportunities.
Mastering your own mind is an important
process that empowers you to navigate
life with intention, clarity, and
resilience. By cultivating awareness,
understanding thoughts, regulating
emotions, practicing self-discipline,
fostering a positive mindset,
prioritizing self-care, and embracing
continuous learning, you can unlock the
power of self-mastery. Remember that this
journey requires patience, persistence,
and self-compassion. Embrace the process
and celebrate every small step forward,
knowing that by mastering your own mind,
you are unlocking your true potential and
creating a more fulfilling and meaningful
life.

27
Talk to the author
Could you take few minutes and give me
the chance to here from you? Are you
satisfied with the content in this book?
What other questions would you like me
answer for you?
……………………………………………………………………………………………………………
I want your negative/positive feedback upon my work!
……………………………………………………………………………………………………………
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Whatsapp: https://wa.me/250792548478
Phone: +250792548478
Blog: https://mihigoanaja.blogspot.com
ADC Blog: https://alreflectionsdc.blogspot.com
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You can still make more impact by joining
the Alreflections Development Society; a
community of many individuals who want to
constantly change their lives while at

28
the same time influencing the well-being
and growth of others. In this book, we
learnt about self-compassion and you
already understand its not about being
selfish. In Alreflections Development
Society, we support each other and the
needy people while practicing a habit of
self-compassion and changing absolutely
everything with simple accomplishments
committed with love and desire to conquer
human suffering.
If you want to share this book, please
return the previous page and talk to the
author to get into a quick agreement for
this supportive activity.
Its time to stop dwelling on negativity and support each
other to reach the well-being.

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