Anne-Marie was born in 1960 in Burnaby, BC but grew up in Calgary, AB. She had a passion for theatre and the arts from a young age, getting involved in drama clubs and productions. She studied drama at the University of Calgary but decided to finish her degree in history at the University of Calgary. She then went to Dalhousie University to complete a Bachelor of Education degree. Anne-Marie met her husband Mike and they moved to Kelowna, BC where she worked various jobs in theatre and teaching. She eventually became a drama and English teacher in School District 23.

2. Anne-Marie always liked to keep it a littlevague by saying she was a child of the sixties.

3. Although technically her family lived in Vancouver, the nearest hospital was in Burnaby
where she was born on 28 Feb 1960.

4. And since 1960 was a leap year she narrowly avoided the Pirates of Penzance paradox.
Quiz question: What is the Pirates of Penzance paradox? (yes, there’s a quiz afterwards)

5. Anne-Marie came into the world with a sense of wide-eyed wonderment –
which she pretty much maintained all her life.

6. Just before her brother Andy was born, the family moved to Calgary.

7. On Anne-Marie’s first day of elementary school she and a friend came home
for lunch and somehow thought school was optional, and less fun than
playing at home, so they didn’t go back. That got sorted out pretty quick.

8. We often talked about her childhood struggles to understand how to be
cool in the late sixties and figure out why real life didn’t look like it did in
the TV commercials.

9. She got herself kicked out of girl guides.
She passed high school homeec because her mom donated a washer
and dryer to theschool.

10. Her love of horses stemmed from a week-long trail ride through Elk Pass near
Kananaskis Lake.

11. She frequently talked about the epicgrade 12 bicycletrip from Jasper to
Calgary. It seems mostly downhill, but not entirely.

12. She ran track for the Calgary Spartans and considered herself a jock, often
going to class in a track suit. Coincidentally, the Spartans trained in the
hallways at my high school and I would often see groups of runners there
after school. But we wouldn’t meet for a few years yet.

13. She went with friends to various church youth groups. Mormon, Jewish,
Presbyterian… didn’t matter as long as they played basketball.

14. She worked serving banquets at theWainwright Hotel in HeritagePark. She
could walk to thebottom of the hill, then catch the steam train up the hill
and into thepark.

15. She worked at a shoe store at ChinookCentrefor a wonderful Italian
woman named Etta Clay.

16. Then she took a drama class at Henry Wisewood High School and met a
teacher named Jim Groulx.

17. She had found something she loved even more than sports. Shedid some
acting and stage management and went to high school drama festivals
but found she somehow had a knackfor directing.

18. She also had a strong sense of social justice. There was a restaurant in
Calgary that posted a sign: ‘If your wife can’t cook, keep her as a pet and
eat here’. Anne-Marieand a friend protested this somewhat offensive point-
of-view, got some newspaper coverage, and thesign was removed.

19. So after high school she registered in the drama department at University of
Calgary. It was a pretty exciting time. Keith Johnstone was in the process of
inventing theatresports.

20. There were classes in improv, technical theatre, film studies and lots of
innovative productions to work on.

21. Perhaps the strangest was the Live Snakes and Ladders Show which was a
semi-scripted snakes and ladders game with live contestants, giant dice
and huge papier-maché snakes you had to crawl down.

22. Anne-Marie worked on all sorts of projects, including getting a grant to
direct her own production of John Millington Synge’s In the Shadow of the
Glen. Usually it was only professors who directed.

23. How did we meet? It was the fall of 1978.I had already sent my friend Lana to find out more about this fearless and
full-of-life girl I had seen in the hallways in the drama department. Then one day she happened to be in the drama
student lounge and was asking if anyone knew anything about logic to help her with her philosophy class homework.
The first guy who offeredto help didn’t know anything about logic but just wanted to meet her. When she brushed
him off, I mentioned that I was actually a philosophy major and was taking a senior course in logic from the same
prof. So we workedthrough her homework together and got to know each other. Turns out she got in trouble in logic
class for using advanced solutions which they weren’t supposed to know how to do in first year. But it all worked out
and I started giving her rides home from rehearsal and generally spending as much time with her as I could.

24. In fact, 38 years later I still have thethank you note she gave me.

25. We also did some children’s theatrein the early days of Storybook Theatre
at the Pumphouse, and shows at theAllied Arts Centre.
She directed a show back at her high school.

26. She had a great summer job at Funtier World – a giant playground beside
the Stampede grounds.
I convinced her bemy model for photography class at Mount Royal. I was
doing a broadcasting diploma at Mount Royal College – because when I
graduated from university, surprisingly, the big philosophy companies in
downtown Calgary weren’t hiring.

27. In spite of being accidentally enrolled as a Sociology major in her second
year, Anne-Marie did another year in the U of C drama department, but
when she was denied access to the senior directing class because, in the
words of the then-head of the department “Women can’t direct because
they make theplay their baby” (it was time for him to retire), she decided
she wasn’t getting her money’s worth from U of C.

28. I had worked the previous summer as a proofreader for Carswell Legal Publishing. They
produced the weekly reports on important cases that Canadian lawyers need to know about.
Anne-Marie got a job there as a technical editor. Shehad to correct all the grammatical errors
and check all the case law that was referred to in thetext. So she’d head off to the downtown
Calgary law library and come back with a list of mistakes that she needed to tactfully explain
to the author, who was frequently a judge or university law professor.

29. We moved into a basement suite at the top of Lakeview Drive. It wasn’t
that glamourous. But ‘living in sin’ for a year (that’s what it was called back
then) proved very helpful when we decided to get married. The non-
denominational minister was grilling us on whether we were sure we could
get along – because she’d never had a divorce and didn’t want to break
her record. We told her we had been living together for a year – and she
was visibly relieved.

30. So we got married and moved to Kelowna.
Actually it wasn’t quitethat simple. It was 1981. I had started workthe first of
August at CHBC-TV punching TV commercials into the late show. So, back
in Calgary, Anne-Marie organized the wedding for thanksgiving weekend
at the log cabin church in heritage park.

31. My uncle John Minions was very impressed with theroom he had booked at
the Four Seasons hotel. Turned out he got the bridal suite. They found Anne-
Marie and I a room overlooking the back alley. And the next day, as it
started snowing, we borrowed the family station wagon, left Calgary and
drove to Kelowna.

32. There was an almost-zero vacancy ratein Kelowna in 1981, but with the
help of Kirk Mitchell from the TV station we found a place near Burtch and
and Sutherland for $525 a month. My take-home was $646 a month so
Anne-Marie got a job at a shoestore in the mall.

33. She got in trouble one timefor designing a window display that used more
than one color of shoe. Apparently that was too radical. And yes, it was the
1980s and big hair and big glasses were cool.

34. We brought home groceries in bicycle panniers. Turns out you can pack
bread really small and sometimes it returns to its original size. She taught me
the concept of ‘seconds’ at dinner and that spaghetti could be served
with sauce.

35. Embarrassing story: Oneafternoon at University I invited Anne-Marie home for dinner.
“Don’t you need to phone your Momand let her know I’m coming?”
“No, there are always 10 or 12 assorted people at dinner, not a problem.”
And it wasn’t a problem – except that dinner that night was ‘mountain-o-weiner wrap’; two
flavours – regular or cheese. But she didn’t scare easy.

36. Meanwhile, back in Kelowna…
After about a year webought a car. 1960 Austin Cambridge. $350. It had fins, a hand-pump
windshield washer, rolling down the windows meant licking your fingers and pulling down,
and it had an emergency starting system that involved a crankthrough a hole in the front
bumper. It also had a big hole in the floor of the front passenger seat, which I solved with a
25-cent used aluminum printing plate from the cap news.

37. I guess it was about that time that I jumped from master control operator
to writing, producing and directing TV commercials.

38. We put in a union at CHBC, I got a big raise.

39. And Anne-Marie started to come to terms with the possibility of becoming a
teacher – something she swore she’d never do.

40. So she went off to UVic to get all the necessary courses to get into the
Education program.
She lasted about 2 weeks in residence. I think it was the ground turkey re-
formed into the shape of a turkey that finished her off. Fortunately, she had a
cousin Lorna, and her husband Mike, who lived in an apartment on Oak Bay
Avenue and they had a spareroom. So she stayed with themfor the year.

41. I drove down to visit a few times, and she flew back to Kelowna for Christmas.
My ancient British car brokedown onetime – but where is the best place in
Canada to get ancient British car parts? Victoria.
I lived in the upstairs room with Joan and Ron in Oyama. That fall I bought a
used violin so they called me thefiddler in theroof.

42. When the school year ended and Anne-Mariecameback to Kelowna, we
got an apartment on Rowcliffe.

43. And she taught some programs for Parks and Rec, and did some more theatre.

44. Snow White was a production directed by the School District drama consultant
– back in the days when school districts had budgets to have those sorts of
positions.

45. This is the only existing production photo of the Knockmany Giant, written by
Auntie Lois and directed by Anne-Marie. I got to play the giant.

46. She played an Italian policeman in We Won’t Pay by Dario Fo, and played
Faye Leung in a political theatrepiecefor the NDP. And she taught even
more drama classes for kids.

47. And then therewas the summer of breakdancing. Anne-Marie, whose
nicknamewas ‘Noddy, the mischievous elf’ met up with Jennie ‘Mad Dog’
Nomura who was running a dance& fitness studio called Splashes.

48. For some unknown reason they decided to organizebreakdancing events,
and managed a crew called TheElectric Rockers.

49. In 1986 she put together a show for the Kelowna Interchurch group called
Food for Thought about how multi-national conglomerates control the world
food supply. In this scene twokids, Anne-Marie and Father Joe are arguing
about breakfast cereal. My favourite performance was for the Unitarians –
who, afterwards, wealways called the ‘Church of the Holy Argument’.

50. Then Anne-Marie applied for a summer theatre tech position with Sunshine
Theatre. I remember her being somewhat taken aback when the artistic
director Joan Panton said she was reluctant to hire married women
because they “should really behome looking after their husbands”.

51. But she got the job and had a great time assistant-stage-managing all sorts
of interesting productions. She would work days with the director rehearsing
the upcoming show, then evenings backstage running the current show.

52. She learned all sorts of things about how professional theatre actually works,
observing directors in the rehearsal process, how actors work through a
script, and what backstage systems you need to make the performance
successful.

53. When Douglas Riske, who we knew from Alberta TheatreProjects in
Calgary, took over SunshineTheatre herecognized her teaching ability
and put her in charge of their summer theatreschool.

54. At some point we moved to a wonderful old duplex on Abbott Street. So
wonderful, in fact, that when we came back from Halifax, we lived there
again.

55. Anne-Marie ended up in a bunch of TV commercials at CHBC. She hosted
a kids’ TV show called Rattlebag, and was, more than once, the
emergency back-up studio interview guest when the premier cancelled at
the last minute.

56. I was doing lots of conga-drumming at that point and we used to go to
events like Festival Latino. Anne-Marie, who couldn’t really pull off Latin,
used to go as a character she called Heidi Acapulco.

57. Somewhere in this whirlwind Anne-Marierealized she should really finish a
university degree, so on the advice of her brother Andy she enrolled as a
history major at U of C. She lived with my parents in Lakeview for a couple
of years while I continued to churn out TV commercials back in Kelowna.

58. I think it was in her last year of history, when she was getting good marks, and
was asked to consider doing a master’s degree, that she realized she was
actually smart and intellectual and could do this academic stuff. This
probably played a role in her devotion to the radical-feminist-leftist book club
she regularly attended for several years. They’re actually called the Lit-Wits.

59. So she graduated, and came backto Kelowna, and things were going fine
until I got a call one day asking if I wanted to go to Halifax and make TV
commercials for Atlantic Television. We talked it over, and Anne-Mariesaid
“sure, why not” … so we did.

60. Actually it wasn’t quitethat simple. I went to start workin April and left her
to pack up the house and move across the country. I found us a tiny
basement suite about a half block from Dalhousie University.

61. When she arrived she discovered there were still 2 days left before the
deadline for applications to the Bachelor of Education programat Dal. So
she applied. They reviewed her application and said they could offer her a
part-timeposition.

62. She said she didn’t want part time and would go talk to theother two universities in Halifax.

63. So they got her in full-time. And at the end of the year she won the Hillis
prize for top education student. Theprize was actually a dented mug,
but it’s still prestigious.

64. She also learned to drive in Halifax – wherethey have the ArmdaleRotary;
2 lanes, 5 exits, with the ocean between twoof them. And we explored
the province - including the Canadian Navy submarine HMCS Okanagan.

65. We made some excellent friends at Dal including Norm Vaughan who shares
her February 28th birthday – same day, same year, pretty much the same
time, except on opposite sides of the continent. In fact, it was on a dare from
Norm and Marie that Anne-Marie applied for, and received, a bursary to
study French for the summer at Laval University.

66. I was just packing thecar to go pick her up from Quebec City when a
mysterious envelopearrived in the mail from her friend Jennie. No note,
nothing except a newspaper clipping about SD23 in Kelowna looking to
hire a drama teacher.

67. So I applied for her. I sent them some newspaper clippings about her
Sunshine Theatre summer school and played up the ‘local girl returns home’
angle. I wrote a ‘My Teaching Philosophy as told to Mike Minions’ article.

68. It was the weekend and were driving back from Montreal through Vermont,
New Hampshire and Maine when she got a phone message to come to
Kelowna for an interview on Monday. As she was getting on the plane I
handed her the envelope with her job application and suggested “she
might want to read this … after the plane was in theair”.

69. But it all worked out and she got hired to teach drama and English at
Springvalley Secondary for September 1990.I finished up my 2-year contract
at ATV in May and it was my turn to arrange a cross-country move.

70. Anne-Marie got a littleannoyed with me as I regularly sent her a 20-
kilogram parcel through Canada Post – which was half the cost of what
the movers would charge. (Who knew you could send Ikea end tables
through the mail?)

71. In her first year teaching she had fairy godparents – Barb Rodger and Tom
Atkinson – who took good care of her. She developed a ‘dessert revue’
theatre format that worked well in the multi-no-purpose school entrance
foyer. She took a couple of interesting productions to the high school
drama festival.

72. Anne-Marie always had good design sense. For Why the Lord Come to
Sand Mountain she and her students hammered together some sawmill
discards in the parking lot of the community theatre and won a set-
design award.

73. After a couple years she followed an inspirational principal, Terry Kooy, to
set up Dr. Knox Middle School.

74. I remember her commenting that for high school teachers it was great
because they could see over theheads of students in the hallway, but for
the teachers that came from elementary it was chaos because the
students weren’t walking in straight lines to the library.

75. At Knox she developed a board-approved course in video production and
started to instill some of the professional habits she’d seen in her television work.

76. She did theatre productions in all sorts of venues, from the cafeteria, to the
gymnasiumto outdoors, where they did a wonderful spring evening of
theatresports improv.

77. She also, because nobody said she couldn’t, started an equestrian club at Dr. Knox. Sheand
a bunch of students went riding after school one day a week. Anne-Marie and I had been
doing dressage at the barn off Sexsmith Road for a couple years. Actually, Anne-Marie was
doing dressage. I was sitting on a horse and pretending that where he went was where I
wanted him to go.

78. Anyway, she had this one particular student who showed up one day and basically took
every course she offered. I think hewas theone that made his own special effects fire gel
and lit his arm on fire in the parking lot as a demo. And she cast himin a play called Sittin’
where he spent the whole show sitting at the top of a ladder. His name is Shawn Talbot.

79. I think it was thesummer of 1996 that we bought a house on Francis Avenue
near the bird sanctuary. And then we had a baby …

80. … Who turned out to be Willa. (Must have been some kind of nesting instinct.)

81. At the time I thought we should get a puppy too – since we’d already beup at 3am.
Perhaps not the best idea.
Actually Anne-Mariegot pulled over by the police walking down Abbott Street – for being
too darn cute.
And Willa was pretty darn cute too.

82. Turns out we had slightly different approaches to parenting.

83. So Willa has kept us busy for several years.
And she seems to have turned out okay.

84. After several more years at Knox Anne-Marie was able to post into the
video production job at KSS. She also taught creativewriting – strongly
influenced by her improv experience with Keith Johnstone at U of C.

85. She helped her students connect with thespoken word community in
Kelowna and they presented several times at Word Ruckus, organized by
OC prof Jake Kennedy.

86. Somewhere in hereAnne-Marie decided to do a Masters degree in
Education at UBCO. Actually her favourite course was theonline ECI831
with Alec Couros through University of Regina.

87. Finally, the drama position at KSS opened up and Anne-Mariemoved back
to teaching drama and directing plays. It was difficult work changing the
culture of the program …

88. … but she was able to do some innovativeproductions, like The Secret in
the Wings, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and Charlotte’s Web.

89. She was able to pass on theunderlying philosophy of her theatre mentors
going all the way backto her own high school experiences.

90. She taught a wonderful improv boot camp. She provided opportunities for
students to direct. She organized daytime performances so elementary
students could go on a field trip to see Charlie and Charlotte.

91. She modelled the best of what a drama course could be – a place to learn
about whoyou are, and how to express yourself with honesty and
conviction, and how to work with others to create something meaningful.

92. In the summer of 2013 Anne-Marie was diagnosed with breast cancer. She
had a mastectomy, chemo, and radiation and was well enough to go
back to work for September 2014.

93. At spring break we did a family trip to Hawaii.

94. She directed a fabulous production of ‘The Complete Works of William
Shakespeare Abridged’

95. in May, June and July.

96. She and Willa snuck in a trip to New York just before school started.

97. Then in October, while she was doing the Run for the Cure, her shoulder
became so painful she had to walkthe rest of the course.

98. It took a couple months to figure out that it was referred pain from a
metastatic tumor in her liver pressing on her diaphragm.
She went back on chemo in January.

99. By May it was looking under control, but the cancer flared up again in July.
By October she was exhausted and the chemo wasn’t having much effect.

100. She went off chemo on October 25. Went into Hospice a week later and
passed away quietly a weekafter that.

101. And we all miss her.

102. So I really struggled when writing this speech. First I
wrote one that was full of crazy stories and funny
memories. But it just didn't feel right. So then I wrote
another one talking about how thankful I was, listing
all the incredible things she did for me. But once
again, something was missing.
Language has its limits. I honestly cannot express how
I feel about my Mother in words. My appreciation,
love, and respect for her is limitless. So I ask you to
listen with your heart, not your ears, and perhaps we
can move beyond the limits of language, and feel
just how lucky we all were to have her in our lives.
The death of a mother is the first sorrow wept without
her. This quote is true. My Mom was my best friend. A
best friend coaching me in life. Guiding me to make
good decisions and dream big.
When my Mother was passing away, I had the
opportunity to share some final thoughts with her.
I thanked my Mom for the many hours spent in the
hot tub, under the stars, being kissed by snowflakes,
talking about our dreams and how we will make
them happen.
I apologized to my Mom, telling her how truly unfair
the cancer was and how sorry I was to see her time
on Earth come to an end.
But I reminded her how grateful I was for the times
we shared and the memories we created.
Lastly, I made my Mom a promise. And I don't make
promises very often. I promised her that I would live a
life that makes her so proud. So proud.
Thank you, I'm sorry, I'm grateful, I promise.
Notice the presence of the people in this room.
Gathered here to remember a friend, teacher,
mother, daughter, sister, wife... all these people here
who have memories of Anne-Marie. All these people
here who, for some in big ways, and other in small
ways, were changed by her presence.
As a friend once told me, "your Mom will live on
through the choices you make, the attitudes you
carry, and the lives you touch. It will be a direct
reflection of the person she helped you to become."
My mom is gone, but her aspirations are immortalized
in my spirit. Anne-Marie is gone, but she lives on
through all of us.
Notice the presence of the people in this room. It is
limitless.
Our hopes, our dreams, our sad days and silly ways
are all united in this room, remembering a beautiful
woman who will grace our hearts forever.
When you leave today, look at the sky.
I remember looking at the sky after she passed and it
was the most beautiful thing.
Willa Holmwood