The document provides tips for budgeting as a couple. It recommends that couples discuss how they will manage finances before getting married, including whether to have joint or separate accounts. It also advises agreeing on budget categories and goals, accommodating individual needs, committing to follow the budget, and regularly reviewing expenses. Making major changes only with mutual agreement is important to avoid conflicts.

1. Budgeting As a Couple: How To Do It Properly
September 22, 2020 by samkadya
For newlyweds, budgeting as a couple or partners can be a very challenging
experience that can make or break a marriage. It is not easy to switch from seeing
your money as your own to now thinking of it as “our” money.
Studies have shown that one of the major factors contributing to marriage friction
and even divorce is finance.
It, therefore, shows that if you can manage to be in accord when it comes to
managing your finances then you can dramatically increase chances of success in
your marriage.
The opposite could also be true. In that, if there will be frictions when it comes to
finances then you could join the many couples and partners that are failing.
It is therefore vitally important that couples and partners agree from the outset how
they are going to manage their finances. And budgeting is one of the tools that you
can use in managing them.
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2. Budgeting As A Couple: How To Do It Properly
1. Agree How You Intend To Manage Your Resources
or Finances
Table of Contents 

3. Ideally before getting married or before starting to live together, you need to sit down
and discuss your goals and values in so far as money is concerned.
At this point, you can decide on whether you intend to have one joint bank account
or not. I would advise that you seriously consider having one bank account as it
helps to build trust and unity in the relationship.
At this point, you also need to openly discuss how each one of you has been
spending your money. After discussing this you can then discuss how as a couple
you intend to spend your money.
This discussion will help you avoid situations where one partner starts complaining
about how one party is spending money. This is because at this stage you will agree
on the parameters that will govern your spending.
It is also a way to incorporate accountability in your marriage.
A Couple budgeting
Next, you need to discuss your goals. Before marriage, you had your own goals but
now you are a team and you need to come up with family goals.
This is a time to give and take. You should be willing to abandon some of your goals
and adopt new ones.

4. For example, you can agree to start saving towards your retirement or towards
purchasing your own house in x number of years. This is much easier if you have
joint bank accounts as it reduces the temptation to misuse these savings.
The importance of this step on how you intend to manage your finances is that it
promotes a harmonious marriage experience as they are few surprises ahead of
you.
That is why I pointed out that it is very important that both parties are transparent in
the discussions.
2. Discuss Individual Needs and Wants And How To
Fund Them
Even though from now onwards you will be doing things together as a couple you
are two individuals with needs and wants outside of the shared needs and wants.
Such being the case you need to accomodate those individual needs and how they
can be funded.
For example, I like soccer while my wife is indifferent. To watch soccer that I want I
need to cable tv subscription.
While this is very important to me, it is a luxury for her. I, therefore, had to work to
convince her how miserable I would be if I did not watch my beloved soccer team on
television. We eventually came to a compromise and I now watch my soccer on
television.

5. The same can apply to ladies who have their own needs and wants. I, therefore,
need to accommodate that too during the budgeting process.
One way this can be accomplished is by giving each an allowance that is solely
controlled by each party. In other words, each party is allowed to do whatever he or
she wants to do with the money without even consulting the other party.
A partner can use this money for purchasing video games, hair grooming, and other
activities not included in your budget.
3. Agree on the Budget Categories And Who Will Be
Responsible For Each Category
After agreeing on how you intend to spend your money, now is the time to jot down
the budget categories.
This is not an exact science. You are therefore free to craft your categories in a way
that you are comfortable with.
Some people prefer a detailed list that creates a category for almost every expense.
Some may prefer grouping expenses into a category.
If you decide to group expenses, it may be helpful to have a breakdown of the
components somewhere.
For example, if you decide to group all groceries under one category then you can
have a list somewhere that lists the groceries you intend to buy e.g. sugar, loaves of
bread, etc.

6. That is what works for me as I want to know the exact number of things I intend to
buy for that month.
I also saw somewhere that you can also group these categories into buckets. Below
are suggestions on the buckets.
Bucket 1 (Savings):
Retirement Fund
Emergency Fund: To cover expenses such as funeral costs, loss of
employment, etc.
Major Future Expenses
Bucket 2 (Accomodation):
Rent or Mortgage
Gas
Heating
Water
Bucket 3 (Living Expenses and Taxes):
Groceries
Medical Insurance
Telephone
Transport costs
Car repairs
Clothing
House Repairs

7. House of 100-dollar bills in the background of a natural landscape.
Income tax
4. Make A Commitment To Strictly Follow The Budget
Having a
budget is
nothing if for
whatever
reason you
cannot follow
it. This is true
of the
government,
companies,
organizations,
and families
too.
I used to work
for an African
government where the govt used to spend more than what was in the budget leading
to huge budget deficits and inflation. The inflation was caused due to the increase in
the money supply.
In the same way, if you as a family won’t strictly follow your budget you could end up
in all sorts of financial problems.
In some cases, you could end up resorting to credit card debt to finance your out-of-
control expenses. While it is easy to get into credit card debt, finding a way to pay

8. credit cards off is a difficult matter if it’s too high.
It is therefore important that at the very outset of your marriage you commit to
following the budget strictly.
That means that if you know that you have a problem with impulse buying, then
maybe the best solution for you may be to surrender money issues to your partner.
This partner will then take custody of all the debit and credit cards.
You partner can then only release the funds to you when you need to use it.
I know that this is a drastic action but it can be the only way out for some people who
are addicted to shopping.
5. Set Time To Discuss And Review Your Spending
And Budget At Least Once A Month
It is important once you have created your budget and have started spending to
meet and review how you are following the budget. It is a kind of accountability
process for each other.
If you don’t do this you could be going off the rails in your expenditure without
knowing it. Knowledge is power if you are to spend within your budget.
This could be a time when you can help each other to be disciplined in your use of
money.
A budget is a flexible document that may need to be revised one a while. I remember
living in a high inflation country where we were forced to change the budget for our
company on a monthly basis.

9. Dave Ramsey – “Abudget is telling your money where to go instead of wondering where it wen.”
The same would also apply to family budgets that may a victim of price rises and in
some cases, you may need to add or remove some expenses. As the late Egyptian
Secretary-General of the United Nations, “only fools don’t change their minds.”
Sometimes it could that there is an emergency that may require that you adjust your
budget. I am here thinking of the Coronavirus epidemic which has decimated
people’s incomes lately.

10. People have been forced to adjust their expenses to match the dramatic change in
circumstances. I know of a firm that has cut their employees’ salaries by 25%. In this
case people have no choice but to adjust their expenses unless ofcourse you are
one of the big shots at the top.
It is because of these reasons that it is important to review your expenses and
budget performance at least once every month if possible. In that way, you will be
able to keep track of your finances. This is one of the ways you can make sure that
budgeting as a couple works for you.
6. You Need To Agree That Any Major Modification To
The Budget Will Be Made By Mutual Agreement
One of the things that can create friction in any marriage, when budgeting as a
couple, is when one partner is not consulted when major changes are made to your
budget.
No partner will be happy to come home and see that the other partner has decided
to make a major purchase such as buying furniture without consulting the other.
It is a real lack of respect for the other party and can needlessly lead to serious
friction in marriages.
It is therefore important that all the parties commit to making sure that any major
modification to the budget is only done after mutual agreement.
This does not mean that if I go to Walmart and find a sale or something not on our
budget, that we really need and is also reasonably priced then I should not buy it.
No, this only applies to major modifications that will mess up your budget.

11. Frequently Asked Questions
Should couples share finances?
Ofcourse they have to share their finances as they are living under one roof and are
legally partners. The issues involving money can be the most divisive issues in many
families and these problems can be reduced by sharing finances.
Should husband and wife share bank account?
For the sake of openness and transparency it is strongly advised that couples should
share bank accounts. Doing otherwise will invite suscipicions and doubts on money
management form the partners.
When you get married you become one and you need to be one in practice and not
in just words. If you are one then you do not need to hide your bank transactions.
There is no better show of unity than sharing a bank account. Doing this will
definitely make it easier to manage your funds and expenses.
If you leave each party to manage their own finances you could end up with one
party digging himself in financial hole with the other knowing. You may have come
across a wife or husband complaining that his or her spouse is now being chased by
debt collectors and all this happened without their knowledge.
And in some jurisdictions, a spouse may be financially exposed to their husband or
wife debts. In such a situation sharing a bank account can be a way out of such
predicaments as you can together settle debts before they are overdue.
If you share a bank account, it may be necessary to make sure that no payment can
be made without both of your signatures. Otherwise you will wake up one day and
discover that your spouse has run away with your money.
It therefore makes sense to anticipate such things and make sure that you protect
yourself by the controls you impose on that shared bank account.
What is the best budget app for couples?
If you are sharing your income then the best app for couples is GoodBudget. It is
based on the envelope budgeting system. However in this case the envelopes are
electronic and are also tracked electronically.

12. The app also allows couples to sync and share budgets. You can therefore as a
couple track your household budget expenses together as the app deducts from
each envelope any payment related to that particular envelope.
As you deduct money from an envelope, the person sharing the budget with you will
be able to know what is spent, where, and how. The app also allows you to save
automatically by processing all this for you.
You can therefore easily save for example for your dream vacation and other future
large purchases. It can also track your debt payoff progress.
If you are still budgeting using the trusted paper then may be it is time you moved
into the 21st century by going digital. Not only is it not less cumbersome but it can
make your budgeting much easier.
I like the fact that you can also sync your bank account to these apps. In this way
you will be able to not only keep track of your expenses but also your bank account
too.
What is the best way for married couples to handle finances?
Personally I think the best way for married couples to handle finances is to maintain
one joint bank account. Having said that I respect those that may not be for this idea.
As families we all face diffrent circumstances and therefore some may choose
another option.
Maintaining one joint account, to me that shows trust and transparency which are
very important characteristics in any relationship. Without these two pillars then your
family life may be in for a rocky ride.
However, if you decide to maintain separate bank accounts then you should at least
still make sure that you split up the bills between yourselves. I have come across
couples who pile almost all of the bills on one person.
You therefore need to make sure that there is some fairness in terms of the sharing
of the bills. Otherwise that can be a source of friction in the family.
Even though I belong to the joint bank account, I understand and get it that people
are different and some may not want to have a joint account with their spouse.

13. For those that opt for the joint account, I would advise that they should only use their
individual accounts for personal expenses only and the funds in those accounts
should come from the joint account. They can then spend the money on their
personal account as they wish.
While maintaining one joint account is important, you still need to learn to budget
your income. It is not alright to start spending your money without a budget as most
people do.
You need a budget as a guide on how you will spend your money. A budget can also
help you in making savings for big projects, i.e. sinking funds. A budget will help you
control your expenses and enable you to have excess cash that you can save.
Conclusion
Budgeting as a couple can be a challenging experience that can lead to friction
between partners. It is therefore important that you agree in advance on the
parameters and rules within which your budget will be prepared. Don’t wait until you
are living together to discuss any money management issues.
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