draft script before any feedback

1. Script for Empty
SCENE 1
INT. LOCATION #1 - DAY
Fade in
[“We Wish you a Merry Christmas” - Incompetech] fades in
Left to right pan towards establishing shot of the scene
CHLOE excitedly runs into the room from right towards the left of
the Christmas tree towards a large present under the tree
CHLOE aggressively opens present and enthusiastically pulls out the
TOY
Cut to CHLOE happily embracing the TOY
Cut to PAUL and JACQUI (parents of CHLOE) proudly smiling and PAUL
has his arm around JACQUI’s shoulder
Cut to CHLOE still happily embracing the TOY
Cut to CHLOE smiling
Cut to CHLOE enthusiastically playing with TOY in front of the
decorated Christmas tree – pan upwards to the ceiling of the scene,
text appears stating EMPTY.
[“We Wish you a Merry Christmas” - Incompetech] fades out
Fade out
SCENE 2
INT. LOCATION #1 - DAY
Fade in
Pan downwards from the ceiling to a long shot of the undecorated
Christmas tree with the TOY sat to the right of the Christmas tree
CHLOE slowly enters from the right, walking with a deflated stance
to the left, PAUL and JACQUI quickly follow behind, acting as though
in a rush
Cut to shot of the TOY
Fade out

2. Scene 3
INT. LOCATION #2 - NIGHT
Fade in
PAUL is angrily holding a piece of paper and as PAUL reads the piece
of paper he begins to look frustrated as he scratches his head in a
frustrated manner
PAUL mouths the word “Shit”
The words on the paper are revealed to the audience, reading It is
our greatest regret to inform you…
Cut to let go…
PAUL’s fist begins to clench on the table
Fade out
…
Scene 4
EXT. LOCATION #1 - DAY
Fade in
Mid-shot of CHLOE walking with the track camera movement following
her as she is walking
Cut to close up shot of the TOY being held by CHLOE as she is
walking – shot with a hand-held camera movement
Cut to an over-the-shoulder shot of CHLOE as she opens the car door
and places the TOY in the front passenger seat of the car
Cut to long shot of the TOY in the passenger seat
[Diegetic sound of door closing]
Zoom, through car window, to a close-up shot of the TOY
Fade out
[“November” - Bensound] continues
Scene 5
EXT. LOCATION #1 - DAY
Fade in
Pan upwards to a low angle shot of PAUL as he opens the car door
Cut to a long shot of the TOY in the car passenger seat
Cut to a close up shot of PAUL smiling

3. INT. LOCATION #3 - DAY
Cut to over-the-shoulder shot of the back of the car driver seat as
PAUL sits in the driver’s seat.
EXT. LOCATION #1 - DAY
Cut to close-up shot of the car tyre as the car begins to drive away
INT. LOCATION #3 - DAY
Cut to mid to long shot, from the back seat of the car facing the
windscreen, as the car is moving.
Fade out
Scene 6
INT. LOCATION #3 - DAY
Fade in
Close up shot of phone ringing
Low angle shot of PAUL as he pulls the car over
EXT. LOCATION #2 - DAY
Cut to long shot of car pulling over to the side of the road in a
rural area
Cut to mid shot as PAUL gets out of the car to answer his phone
INT. LOCATION #3 - DAY
Cut to close up shot of the TOY sat on PAUL’s coat as PAUL picks up
coat and drags the TOY with it
EXT. LOCATION #2 - DAY
Cut to mid shot as the TOY falls out of the car
Cut to mid shot of PAUL on the phone, the focus then changes to the
TOY on the floor behind him
Cut to close up shot of the TOY by the car tyre as PAUL gets back in
the car without realising he has left the TOY. With the same close
up shot the car will pull away leaving the TOY
Cut to extreme close up shot of the TOY
Cut to long shot of the TOY by the side of the road, presented to be
in a completely isolated and rural area
Fade out
[Insert chosen music 2] continues

4. Scene 7
EXT. LOCATION #2 - DAY
Fade in
Pan upwards to a mid-shot of the TOY as the TOY is still abandoned
on the side of the road
EXT. LOCATION #2 - NIGHT
Quick cut to the same mid shot of the TOY for one second
EXT. LOCATION #2 - DAY
Quick cut to the same mid shot of the TOY for one second – this time
the climate will be raining
Quick cut to the same mid shot of the TOY, BETH’s feet appear behind
the TOY and her hands begin to reach for the TOY, and pick it up out
of the shot. At the point of BETH’s first appearance the music will
change to [“Piano Moment” – Bensound]
Cut to a mid-shot of BETH’s neck to lower torso as she tightly hugs
the TOY
Cut to an over-the-shoulder shot as BETH places the TOY in the car
Cut to a long-shot as the car drives away
Fade out
[“Piano Moment” – Bensound] continues
Scene 8
INT. LOCATION #3 - DAY
Fade in
Long-shot of the door inside BETH’s house, as BETH enters through
the door, holding the TOY and drops all her bags on the floor
Cut to close up shot of BETH’s feet as she kicks off her shoes
Close up shot of the TOY as BETH carries the TOY upstairs and opens
the door into the bathroom
Low angle shot as BETH walks into the bathroom
Over the shoulder shot as BETH lowers the TOY into the bathtub and
picks up the showerhead
Left to right pan, of a mid to long shot, of BETH washing the TOY in
the bathtub. Once the pan moves, to the point that BETH is hiding
the TOY from the view of the audience, the TOY is then revealed to
be PEPPER (the dog)

5. Cut to a close up shot of PEPPER whose appearance is battered and
mistreated
Cut to extreme close up of PEPPER’s eye
Cut to a zoom out from PEPPER to BETH washing PEPPER until the shot
reaches a long shot, here there will be a cut to a black screen.
[“Piano Moment” – Bensound] fades out
Non-diegetic sound of a dog whimpering. While a title appears,
reading: Dogs are for life, not just for Christmas. Don’t treat them
like a gift.
Fade out
THE END.