Action research on how to conquer the fear of spiders.

1. A Tale of
Overcoming
By: Kate Marinangeli

2. ✦ Once upon a time...
guy
this
lived outside my window. Although two panes of glass and a heavy wooden door
(not to mention a host of other advantages I had) stood between us, at 6:52 this
morning when we first laid eyes on each other (all 654 of his eyes), I stood
paralyzed just at the sight of him.

3. ✦ It was at this point that I realized I have a problem. This paralysis causes
me to lose all sense of reasonability. Truly - I lose my mind. I’m not really a
screamer until I come eye-to-eye with one of these guys. So, I decided that
today would be the day of conquering fears.
195 0...
e, circa
M

4. ✦ After hours upon hours of research, I found that I’m not alone in this world.
No, in fact, there are entire groups devoted to this very problem. Thankfully,
there is hope! Casting aside anything that required hypnosis or money, my
research left me with a few interesting solutions to the problem.
are my None
ese e.
Th opl of thi
pe s.

5. ✦ After whittling down the options for my cure, I found that I could do one of three
things:
From here...
1. Anchoring: Detaching the emotion (petrified
fear!!) I connect with spiders and reconnecting a
to...
calmer, more peaceful state with the thought of
a spider thus re-writing my reactions.
here.
r.
a spide
That’s
2. Control: Taking over control of situation
through not thinking and rationally
conquering the fear.
...And that’s not happening.
That’s
contro
l.
3. Encounter: Simply letting spiders crawl all over
me until it no longer freaks me out.

6. ✦ Because option one seemed like too much psychoanalysis and option three
seemed like it could actually increase my fear of spiders, I decided to follow
option two. I’m regaining control from this moment forward. There are
brighter days ahead. I can feel it.
mi nd.
me of
e fr a
futur
My

7. ✦ Each piece of research dealt, in some way, with learning to control
emotions. In one case, controlling them while spiders crawled all over me,
another by creating new emotions, and another by dealing with the emotions
that were already in existence.
Oh, the variety of my emotions.
(Not so cute on me, though.)

8. ✦ Because time was of the essence (It is really time to see this last piece of
irrationality disappear from my very rational life...), I decided to try the
“control what’s already there” approach.
l
Co ntro
:
Pr oject
.
y there
a lread this.
t’s
Wha
No
tm
yb
est
day
.

9. .
oked
is co
h icken
t his c
say
I’d
,I mean
n
hicke
d by c e.
... An m
✦ In order to do this, it took several steps. First, I had to train myself not to
think. That took a lot of training. Every morning when I flipped on the light
and saw that guy staring intimidatingly at me, daring me to freak out, it took
everything in me not to heed his taunts. However, as I monitored my internal
temperature, I noticed that each time I saw the spider - though I did not
always respond outwardly - my inward fear was just the same.

10. ider!
a n a sp
cut er th
So much
uch.
So m
✦ Thankfully, the results began to change with the introduction of step two.
This step includes having a back up thought for when “just don’t think about
it” fails. Because I generally encounter my friend early in the morning, I
began to train my mind to think about what I was going to wear that day.
Much less scary.

11. ✦ Steps one and two were easy enough when I was prepared to see the
spider. However, the results really fell apart when my bedroom window
spider called all his friends and told them to sneak up on me in the garage,
bathroom, and classroom. These unsuspected villains got me. Every. Single.
Time. Step three helped here.

12. I n my
e me.
e futur
is th mind.
This
✦ Step three involves looking toward the future. After three weeks of
practicing mind-over-matter, I began to see consistent improvements. I now
began to wonder, “What will life be like when I’m able to turn on a light
without the fear of what will move in the corner? What about when I can go
hiking without freaking out whenever I cross paths with a cobweb? Moving
boxes? The possibilities are endless. Oh the freedom!” This step helped.
Suddenly, it was no longer about the moment, it was about the future.
Spiders began to represent a giant victory I was on the cusp of achieving.

13. ✦ Step four came naturally. Each time I saw a spider and contained my shriek
to a small squeak, or better yet, no sound at all, it built my confidence. I
gradually began looking forward to seeing spiders as an opportunity to prove
that they were 1 inch, and I was 68.
l 1” o f
r . Al
a spide
Th at’s it.
’’ of
A ll 5’8
me. .
That’s me

14. ✦ Though the occasional wolf spider still causes me to recoil, I’m nowhere
near where I was. And, I’m still moving forward. So far, this has spanned the
course of a month, but this research project is still in action. I noticed that the
more I cut off the initial fear, refuse to dwell on any emotion, and avert my
thoughts to something else, I see the most concrete progress. As these
steps are coupled with looking toward the future and appreciating each
victory, my mindset consistently changes. All of the sudden it becomes less
about the fear and more about the conquering. I’m taking the steps I used
here and applying and adapting them to other fears. Next up: heights.
Goodbye fear! Hello skydiving!
A
ny
thi
ng
is
p os
si ble
.