I used to think that confidence was like a room that I wanted to be able to walk into anytime. After a deep dive into the psychology of confidence, I know that the opposite is true - when I'm not confident, it's like I'm trapped in an Escape Room challenge, and all I need to do is solve the puzzle. Here's what I learned.
Amy Duke says, in a
“The person who
cares least wins.”
• Write and then Read back to yourself, a list of 4 times you
• Write out your best strengths.
• Write out a time when you felt mastery
• Write out attributes you share with a favorite “celebrity”
STRENGTHS ARE YOUR
MITIGATE YOUR GAPS
• Learn voraciously
• Ask for help
• Find a coach/mentor
• Recruit a volunteer
• Without slides. Impromptu. Set to music.
Relentlessly. Conversationally and
scripted. Sing it! Dance while pitching!
• GET TOLD NO x20 and notice that you survived.CRITIQUE
REDUCE VULNERABILITY FACTORS
CREATE YOUR OWN
AFFIRMING SITUATIONAL CONTEXT
There are thousands of VCs, of every type. The network of
entrepreneurship is vast. There is no one way to succeed. But there
is only one you.
● Reduce the stakes.
● The person who cares less wins.
Best version of yourself is better than pretending to be what
someone thinks other person wants you to be.
● Remember Sasha Fierce
● Choose the power chair in the room
● Eccentric clothing (drag persona)
● Memory token in my pocket (eg, card with
your most powerful moment)
ENGAGE AN ABUNDANCE MINDSET
YOU DO YOU
(these are mine, yours may be different)
EMPATHIZE WITH THE OTHER PERSON
● VCs are scared too. They have investors, too.
● Meet them where they are.
● It’s a trust relationship. If you’re from
different worlds, it can be harder to
understand and trust each other. We have to
IN THE MOMENT
MANAGE YOUR THOUGHTS, URGES, SENSATIONS
Recall a time when you felt powerful (notecard in your pocket).
Notice and name negative thoughts. (“I had a thought that...”)
Notice and name symptoms of stress and fear you are experiencing,
then Intervene privately.
In the bathroom: Power pose. Wall sit.
At the table: Breathe in for 4 out for 8 like through a straw.
Touch the card in your pocket, and take a moment to be
Freddie Mercury walking onstage at Wembly
• Stereotype Threat
• Imposter Syndrome
Notice and resist urges to make yourself small.
Make eye contact with someone while speaking.
Avoid eye contact with someone while listening.
The slides are online at: