2. What are dialectical
tensions?
I. Opposing forces people
experience in their
relationships.
II. These contradictions prove
helpful in relational
development
3. Ways to manage dialectical
tensions:
I. Denial
II. Disorientation
III. Alternation
IV. Segmentation
V. Balance
VI. Integration
VII. Recalibration
VIII. Reaffirmation
IX. Moderation
X. Reframing
XI. Selection
XII. Polarization
4. Denial
“Telling ourselves stories that hide
the truth.”
Communicators respond to one end of the
dialectical spectrum and ignore the other
and may insist that ‘everything is fine’
5. Disorientation
Communicators feel so overwhelmed and
helpless that they are unable to confront
their problems. In the face of dialectical
tensions, they might fight, freeze, or even
leave the relationship.
Partners who use this tactic
compartmentalize different areas of their
relationship.
Segmentation
7. Alternation
Communicators who use this strategy
choose one end of the dialectical
spectrum at some times and the other end
at other times.
Communicators who try to balance
dialectical tensions recognize that both
forces are legitimate and try to manage
them through compromise.
Balance
8. Integration
With this strategy, communicators
simultaneously accept opposing forces
without trying to diminish them.
Communicators can respond to
dialectical challenges by reframing them
so that the apparent contradiction
disappears.
Recalibration
9. Reaffirmation
This strategy acknowledges that
dialectical tensions will never disappear.
Instead of trying to make them go away,
reaffirming communicators accept—or
even embrace—the challenges that the
tensions present.