Source dungeon of_depression_complete

VOLUME 08.02
DUNGEON OF DEPRESSION

08.02
SECTION 1: sermon notes
SECTION 2: ﬁll-ins
SECTION 3: discussion outline
SECTION 4: skits
SECTION 5: leadership notes
contents

All content © 2007 Youth Leader’s Coach. All rights reserved. youthleaderscoach.com
1. Opening stats/info on youth depression:
a. Depression is the most common emotional health challenge in the United States faced by
teenagers.
b. About 20% of teenagers will experience some level of serious depression before they reach
adulthood.
c. Between 10% - 15% of teenagers have some symptoms of depression at any one time in our
country.
d. As many as 8.3% of teenagers suffer from depression for at least a year at a time.
e. 30% of teenagers with depression also have a substance abuse problem.
f. Untreated depression is the #1 cause of suicide in our country and the third leading cause of death
among teenagers.
2. Some of the Bible’s greatest heroes dealt with depression:
a. King David was seriously depressed due to unconfessed sin in his life. (see Psalm 51)
b. Jonah was depressed because he was running from what God wanted him to do and was living in
willful, big-time disobedience. (see Jonah 1-2)
c. Elijah the prophet was incredibly depressed…all mostly because he wasn’t taking care of his body.
He was really tired, hadn’t taken a break, and needed some decent food. That’s the very
“unspiritual” solution the angel of the Lord gave to him for his deep depression. (see 1 Kings 19:5-8)
3. A few of the more typical causes for depression:
a. We let the negative “junk of life” play over and over in our minds.
“Life isn’t about waiting for the storms to pass…it’s about learning to dance in the rain.”
b. Important dreams and expectations don’t come through.
c. Major relationships are lost.
d. Undealt with ANGER, bitterness, and resentment. (Depression is often deﬁned as “anger turned
inward”.)
e. A major life tragedy (or loss) occurs that we can’t seem to “bounce back” from.
f. Drug and/or alcohol abuse (which eventually causes both our moods and our life to fall apart).
g. We begin to use “depression” and “feeling bad” as a manipulation to get attention from other
people…and eventually, we create dangerous emotional patterns for ourselves.
h. A medical/hormonal imbalance occurs in your body chemistry (much like diabetes). This kind
of chemical imbalance needs medical attention. There are some awesome drugs that can bring
your hormonal balance back into place. This kind of depression is MUCH HELPED by all the things
we’re going to talk about…but will also need some medical attention. (Again, to get medical
attention makes you no “weaker” than taking insulin makes a person who is diabetic. Both
situations are caused by a chemical imbalance in your system.)
sermon notes

Tonight’s First Drama Clip: “Depression … It’s Just Who I Am!” Skit
4. Dealing with depression before it “eats you alive”.
a. Start talking to yourself! (i.e. Take control of your mind and your “self-talk”.)
Proverbs 23:7, “As a man THINKS, so is he.”
Proverbs 12:5, “The THOUGHTS of the righteous are right…”
A Roman emperor named Marcus Aurelius who lived 150 years after Christ said:
“I THINK TO DETERMINE THE WAY I AM.”
A simple but profound statement: It takes WORK on my part to be HAPPY.
b. Choose to make your “surround sound” positive (i.e. music, media and friends).
c. “Prime the pump” with your choice to smile, laugh, listen to good music, etc.
Years ago, my “Aunt Charlotte” lived on a farm and had an old-time water pump. I remember as
a little girl standing at the sink, moving the pump handle up and down. It felt so useless, just like
I was pumping air.
But if I didn’t give up, eventually moving that handle up and down would become MORE
DIFFICULT. Now I was really tempted to quit! But my wise old aunt told me that this difficulty was
just a sign that the water would start flowing soon if I didn’t quit.
Soon, water did begin to gush out of the pump…all because I “kept pumping” when I didn’t feel
like it and it didn’t seem to do any good.
In a simple way, that’s how it is with JOY in our lives. We all have a “well of water” inside our
heart. The “pump handle” to bring it up to the surface is smiling, laughing, singing – all purposeful
actions of JOY whether I feel like or not.
At first, the physical expressions will often feel phony, forced, and like they aren’t doing any good.
But if we keep it up, soon we will have a “gusher” of the Lord’s authentic joy. Right choices, even
in this area, really do bring right emotions.
Nehemiah had it really right when he said, in the middle of some pretty depressing circumstances,
“The JOY of the Lord is my strength.” (Nehemiah 8:10)
d. Talk “feelings” to a good friend and sometimes journal about what you are feeling.
e. Get physical! In other words, know that any form of exercise releases endorphins in your body
that actually help you FEEL HAPPIER.
sermon notes

sermon notes
f. Take a lesson from the jailhouse boys, Paul and Silas…and realize that JOY is a CHOICE.
“After midnight, as Paul and Silas were praying and singing spiritual songs of praise to God…
Suddenly there was a great earthquake, so that the very foundations of the prison were shaken.
And at once, all of the prison doors were opened and their prison chains came unfastened.”
(Acts 16:25-26)
g. Do something to get your mind off yourself and onto OTHER people or things. DON’T JUST SIT
THERE! The depression will only multiply if you let yourself “veg” like what you will want to.
“A man wrapped up in himself really is a small package.”
5. A few words about suicide…the ultimate “dirty little secret”.
a. Suicide is the third leading cause of death among teenagers in America.
b. For every teen suicide, experts estimate there are 10 other teen suicide attempts.
c. Approximately 1 in 5 teenagers have THOUGHT about suicide, about 1 in 6 teenagers have made
PLANS for suicide, and more than 1 in 12 teenagers in America have ATTEMPTED suicide in the last
year.
Personal sharing from the heart on this topic…
Tonight’s second drama clip: “What If…” Skit

1. Opening stats/info on ___________________________ depression:
a. Depression is the most common emotional health challenge in the United States faced by
teenagers.
b. About 20% of teenagers will experience some level of serious depression before they reach
adulthood.
c. Between 10% - 15% of teenagers have some symptoms of depression at any one time in our
country.
d. As many as 8.3% of teenagers suffer from depression for at least a year at a time.
e. 30% of teenagers with depression also have a substance abuse problem.
f. Untreated depression is the #1 cause of suicide in our country and the third leading cause of death
among teenagers.
2. Some of the ____________________________ greatest heroes dealt with depression:
a. King David was seriously depressed due to unconfessed sin in his life. (see Psalm 51)
b. Jonah was depressed because he was running from what God wanted him to do and was living in
willful, big-time disobedience. (see Jonah 1-2)
c. Elijah the prophet was incredibly depressed…all mostly because he wasn’t taking care of his body.
He was really tired, hadn’t taken a break, and needed some decent food. That’s the very
“unspiritual” solution the angel of the Lord gave to him for his deep depression. (see 1 Kings 19:5-8)
3. A few of the more typical ______________________________ for depression:
a. We let the negative “junk of life” play over and over in our minds.
“Life isn’t about waiting for the storms to pass…it’s about learning to dance in the rain.”
b. Important dreams and expectations don’t come through.
c. Major relationships are lost.
d. Undealt with ANGER, bitterness, and resentment. (Depression is often deﬁned as “anger turned
inward”.)
e. A major life tragedy (or loss) occurs that we can’t seem to “bounce back” from.
f. Drug and/or alcohol abuse (which eventually causes both our moods and our life to fall apart).
g. We begin to use “depression” and “feeling bad” as a manipulation to get attention from other
people…and eventually, we create dangerous emotional patterns for ourselves.
h. A medical/hormonal imbalance occurs in your body chemistry (much like diabetes). This kind
of chemical imbalance needs medical attention. There are some awesome drugs that can bring
your hormonal balance back into place. This kind of depression is MUCH HELPED by all the things
we’re going to talk about…but will also need some medical attention. (Again, to get medical
attention makes you no “weaker” than taking insulin makes a person who is diabetic. Both
situations are caused by a chemical imbalance in your system.)
ﬁll - ins

4. Dealing with depression before it “_____________________ you alive”.
a. Start talking to yourself! (i.e. Take control of your mind and your “self-talk”.)
Proverbs 23:7, “As a man THINKS, so is he.”
Proverbs 12:5, “The THOUGHTS of the righteous are right…”
A Roman emperor named Marcus Aurelius who lived 150 years after Christ said:
“I THINK TO DETERMINE THE WAY I AM.”
A simple but profound statement: It takes WORK on my part to be HAPPY.
b. Choose to make your “surround sound” positive (i.e. music, media and friends).
c. “Prime the pump” with your choice to smile, laugh, listen to good music, etc.
Nehemiah had it really right when he said, in the middle of some pretty depressing circumstances,
“The JOY of the Lord is my strength .” (Nehemiah 8:10)
d. Talk “feelings” to a good friend and sometimes journal about what you are feeling.
e. Get physical! In other words, know that any form of exercise releases endorphins in your body
that actually help you FEEL HAPPIER.
f. Take a lesson from the jailhouse boys, Paul and Silas…and realize that JOY is a CHOICE.
“After midnight, as Paul and Silas were praying and singing spiritual songs of praise to God…
Suddenly there was a great earthquake, so that the very foundations of the prison were shaken.
And at once, all of the prison doors were opened and their prison chains came unfastened.”
(Acts 16:25-26)
g. Do something to get your mind off yourself and onto OTHER people or things. DON’T JUST SIT
THERE! The depression will only multiply if you let yourself “veg” like what you will want to.
“A man wrapped up in himself really is a small package.”
5. A few words about ___________________________…the ultimate “dirty little secret”.
a. Suicide is the third leading cause of death among teenagers in America.
b. For every teen suicide, experts estimate there are 10 other teen suicide attempts.
c. Approximately 1 in 5 teenagers have THOUGHT about suicide, about 1 in 6 teenagers have made
PLANS for suicide, and more than 1 in 12 teenagers in America have ATTEMPTED suicide in the
last year.
ﬁll - ins

DUNGEON OF DEPRESSION DISCUSSION OUTLINE
[Leader: Given the stats, tonight’s message is of the utmost importance. You may have one or more
students in your small group who are secretly struggling with depression and need a safe place to be
heard. Lean in and listen closely. The impact of tonight might be huge in the lives and hearts of our
students as we equip them with ways to deal with depression.]
1. Let’s go around the circle and talk about the high-point and low-point of our week so far.
2. We all have highs and lows, ups and downs, peaks and valleys…it’s a part of life. What’s the
difference between just having a “down day or two” vs. something more serious like “depression”?
3. Does it surprise you that great heroes of the faith, like David, Jonah and Elijah, probably dealt with
depression? Think outside the box, why do you think God ensured those stories were written for you
and me to read?
[Leader: When you ask more personal questions (like the one below), often times it’s helpful for you to
share ﬁrst. Always be cautious and ensure that the story you share is appropriate for the audience. In
addition, as students share, engage them by asking more questions like, “how did that make you feel?”
Obviously be sensitive to the comfort level of your group, you don’t want to ask questions that might be
too intrusive.]
4. Do you know anyone who is or has ever struggled with depression? Can you tell their story?
5. I am going to read you a list of just a couple of the causes for depression. In fact, I am going to read
it twice. Listen to the list and see what jumps out as the single thing most likely to cause depression
in you or your friends?
a. Letting the negative “junk of life” play over and over in our minds
b. Important dreams or expectations don’t come through
c. Major relationships that are lost
d. Undealt with anger, bitterness and resentment
e. A major life tragedy or loss
6. One of the quotes read tonight was, “Life isn’t about waiting for the storms to pass, it’s about learning
to dance in the rain.” What does that mean? What does it take to learn to “dance in the rain”? What
are some of the different choices you’ll have to make in order to “dance”?
7. No one can determine where your head goes but you. You have to choose where you allow your
thoughts to take you, what tape recordings you allow to be replayed in your head. When negative
thoughts or feelings about yourself or a particular situation start to get the best of you, what are some
ways or things you can do to “replace those thoughts”?
8. One of the ways we talked about dealing with depression tonight was to “talk feelings to a good
friend.” My prayer is that you’ll ﬁnd some friends in this group that you can “talk feelings with.” Know
that we always want this to be a safe place for you to share your heart. When we get together, we
want it to feel like family. Love, encouragement and prayer are big deals here. So as we close
tonight, do you have any prayer requests…maybe it has to do with something regarding tonight’s
topic, maybe not?
discussion outline

skit
DEPRESSION...IT’S JUST WHO I AM!
Brianna is a student sitting in the crowd who stands and begins her monologue as she walks around the
room and up to the stage. The spotlight follows her around the room. She hits the stage right when
she begins to talk about Oxygen, at which time the lights go up and we see students behind her having a
good time talking, hugging appropriately and hanging out. When her monologue is approaching the end
she begins the slow walk back to her seat, the lights on the stage go back down and the other students
freeze.
Brianna:
Here I go again, right. Wondering why I got up to face one more day.
I get up everyday and I wish that I could ﬁnd one ounce of peace.
I want one minute of joy.
I wish somebody could know what it’s like to get up and know how I feel.
See, I get up everyday and I can’t escape the pain.
No matter if anything was perfect, no matter if my life was going just the way I want it to,
it doesn’t matter because I can’t escape the clouds.
They hover over me, everywhere I go they follow me.
The only feeling I know anymore is sadness, hurt. I’m full of confusion, pain, rage.
I wish for one minute, for one day I could just forget.
That the thoughts would stop going through my head, that the tape would just stop rolling.
I wish for one minute that I could just sleep and dream it all away.
But I’ll just get up. I’ll try to face the world.
And today I’ll go to the one place I can be me…Oxygen. The one place I can come and be real
…where there are faces I can look at and see authenticity and people that really care.
God, if I can only feel this everyday of the week.
If I could only see these people and live this life seven days a week.
But God, what about the other six days?
Why do I have to walk away?
Why is it that on Wednesday night I can feel joy because of people?
I can feel love because they know how to hug me.
But when I wake up on Thursday morning it’s this same game.
It’s the same hurt. It’s the same clouds that never go away.
The same movie that I just can’t forget.
God why? Can somebody just tell me? Can somebody just give me peace?
Or is this just who I am? This is my identity, right? Why don’t I just give up?
Why don’t I just accept that this is my life and this is the person that I’ll be.
Why don’t I just stop looking for peace?
Why don’t I stop wasting my time just wishing I could smile and it be real?
But you know what, maybe I will. Maybe I’m done.
Depression, it’s just who I am.

skit
“WHAT IF...”
James’ mother is sitting on the stage sobbing out loud over his body (a double that resembles character)
that is lifeless in her arms. About halfway through the skit James’ friends walk in and sit to console his
mother. The whole time James is up walking around behind them doing his monologue.
James: I know what you’re thinking, looks like I got it all together…right?
But you have no idea what’s going on inside of me.
Look at me! I ﬁnally did it.
No more heart beats, no more breaths. I couldn’t take it!
Over the past year, it’s been bad day after bad day.
There have been so many bad days, that the good ones, they’re just better bad ones.
I have had no hope. Dreams...what dreams? There are no dreams.
I’ve been out here all by myself...
And Mom, just quit crying. I don’t even know right now why you’re crying.
For 22 years you just looked past me. You didn’t want anything to do with me.
Don’t take this moment and try to act like it’s all about you.
I ﬁnally did it! I showed you!
And Dad, where’s he?
My dad, he’s good at this, he just doesn’t show up.
I just needed him to tell me he was proud of me.
I just needed you to tell me that you loved me!
I just needed to not be all alone.
I needed my friends. Where are my friends at? Where were they?
I’ll tell you where they were.
They were waiting on me to crack a joke or be funny…but no…where are they today?
(Ryan and John walk on to the scene and try to console James’ mom.)
Ryan, John, I thought that I was all alone. I thought you guys forgot about me.
I thought you just wanted me to be funny. I can’t believe you’re here.
Mom: My son, my baby.
(Mom is talking to the double lying in her arms, James is walking around behind her.)
James: No, don’t call me that now.
(Obviously, mom cannot hear him.)
Mom: Just give me another chance.
James: No.
Mom: Just breathe, just breathe James...I love you!
James: No, don’t tell me that now.
(Mom is sobbing pleading for him to come back.)

skit
James: Momma, not this far.
Why didn’t you tell me that two weeks ago!?!?
Why...why…this is stupid...no...why?
I thought this would show you. I thought this would make everything better.
I thought that this would pay you guys back!
But I’m realizing in this moment that you guys did love me.
I had people that loved me. I had people that cared about me! I was such an idiot!
I was such a fool to make this happen. Oh, If I could only go back God!
I would just ask for one more chance but I know, there’s not one more chance.
I did it. I took the story of my life and I, I didn’t allow You to write the chapters.
Because in the end, I wrote the last chapter of my life leaving you, God, no more chapters
left to write.

LIFE CHANGE HAPPENS BEST IN CIRCLES, NOT ROWS
Judy Gregory
I played a lot of sports when I was a kid and was hit more than once in the mouth with a basketball,
softball, football, elbow...you name it! A couple of years ago the dentist told me I must have been hit
one too many times because my front tooth was “pulpless”, which explained why it was slowly becoming
discolored.
After living with it for what seemed like forever, I decided to do something about it! I was anxious to take
care of it before I moved from Indiana, where I was born and raised, to Atlanta. So, I put my fear aside
and jumped into the dentist chair. Not to be gross, but the dentist ground my permanent tooth to a nub,
then put a veneer on it. Well, like $1,500 later, I noticed it had a flaw. I was going to “just live with it” but I
decided that $1,500 was too much money to spend to, “just live with it”. So, a couple weeks ago, when I
was home they “sawed” (yes, that’s the word the assistant used) it off and took impressions…twice! They
told me it would take three weeks for the new permanent tooth to be made, so they gave me a temporary
one and slapped it on Mr. Nub with some glorified super-glue looking stuff.
The parting words I received were, “don’t bite into anything, especially something like a sandwich.” Well,
I wasn’t thinking when I bit into a french fry two weeks later. Needless to say, off comes the temporary
tooth while eating at the Cheesecake Bistro in Atlantic Station. The dentist told me, “If it comes off, no
problem! Just buy some dental glue at the drugstore and put it back on.” Three attempts with three
different types of “dental glue” and it was definitely a “no go”. So, I called the dentist back home and they
were able to get my little tooth Fed-Ex’ed in early. I made a whirlwind trip home back to Indiana just to
get it. All I was concerned with at the time was getting my new permanent tooth put on. I got a great
deal on the flight and got taken to the cleaners on the rental car, but I didn’t care. We were heading into
the Group Conference in Cincinnati, Ohio over the weekend and the one thing I didn’t want to do was
be consumed with fear over whether or not I was going to spit my fake tooth out at someone and get it
lodged in their eye.
I tell you all that for this reason and this reason alone. I was literally home for less than 24 hours, but I felt
the need to call a good friend – a friend that I love, respect and think the world of. I knew he had been
going through a rough time and asked him and his wife to lunch (pre the dental appointment I might add,
so I was doing the balancing act of trying to keep my tooth in my mouth). I had no great words of
wisdom to share, it was just lunch, that’s it! I simply wanted to encourage them and let them know I
cared.
Only later did I discover it was a bigger deal than I realized. On his blog, he wrote…
I have a pal named Judy Gregory from Atlanta. She used to be here, and now she is there.
She came home for a quick dental appointment and made room for my wife and I for lunch.
Here is my list of why lunch with Judy was great…
1. She invited us!
2. She paid!
3. She was encouraging the whole time!
4. She had “nuggets” of wisdom sprinkled throughout our conversation.
5. She is a part of an amazing ministry in the ATL, and keeps me up to date on her latest
whatever.
leadership notes

6. She had a tooth that was about to fall out.
7. She invited us to make a pit stop in the ATL in April.
8. She asked about our kids.
9. She inspired me today by one particular line…“Stay in the trenches and ﬁght your way out.”
10. She made me think about working at a church again someday.
11. She didn’t have an agenda, she wasn’t digging for “stuff.”
Judy – I appreciate your friendship…WE appreciate your friendship. Have fun in Ohio!
Reading his post, with tears running down my eyes, it gave me a word picture of what I always want the
small groups in my ministry to “look” and “feel” like. Why? Because Jeanne has always taught me, “give
away what you want most”. Based on my heart’s response to his post, that’s what I must have done
without fully realizing it that day.
Here are the seven things I accidentally did for him that I desire in my own life. And, if he needs it and
I need it, then more than likely our kids need it too! Small groups are one of the best environments to
facilitate the “look” and “feel” we all need.
1. I need to FEEL like you really WANT TO BE WITH ME. My friend felt that because he knew it
would have been easier for me to not call given my near “toothless” state.
2. Just like him, I need ENCOURAGEMENT more frequently than I care to admit.
3. I want you to ask me about MY FAMILY, MY LIFE AND REMEMBER MY NAME. He has some
cool kids, so I just checked in to see how they were doing and what they were up to.
4. I need SPRINKLINGS OF WISDOM, but not too much at one time. We are all educated way
beyond our level of obedience, even middle school students.
5. I need you to CHALLENGE me to stay in the game. WHEN I MESS UP, which I will do, I need
you not to abandon me.
6. I need you to INVITE ME to be a part of your life. By inviting him and his family to the ATL,
there was no doubt of my commitment to them.
7. I need you NOT to always have an AGENDA. There are times you need to accomplish an
agenda, but certainly not always.
I think in student ministry we may need to redeﬁne success for ourselves and our leaders. Too often we
give them a list of discussion questions and if they make it through, have a decent discussion, we call it
success…without authentic relationship, that’s not success. My realization…success can be found in
Christ-honoring relationships sprinkled with conversations of wisdom.
leadership notes

• New leadership articles uploaded weekly!
• Audio resources available at the online store!
• Jeanne’s upcoming conference schedule!
• E-mail and podcast sign-ups!
• Source & Youth Leader’s Coach subscription info!
… AND MUCH MORE!
THERE’S MORE AVAILABLE ONLINE AT
youthleaderscoach.com
YOUTH LEADER’S COACH
P.O. Box 450309
Atlanta, GA 31145
404-284-8262
www.youthleaderscoach.com

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