melr kgoem eke ge

1. 1
00:00:13,796 --> 00:00:15,841
You said you'd be home at 7:00.
2
00:00:16,016 --> 00:00:18,583
Go sleep on the bed.
3
00:00:25,329 --> 00:00:27,636
Oh, dear.
4
00:00:27,810 --> 00:00:30,117
Oh, who am I kidding?
5
00:00:30,291 --> 00:00:32,945
I will never have enough money
to go to San Diego.
6
00:00:33,120 --> 00:00:34,991
Oh, maybe next year.
7
00:00:35,165 --> 00:00:37,298
But how many next years
do I have left?
8
00:00:37,472 --> 00:00:38,995
Leave me.
9
00:00:39,169 --> 00:00:41,302
I have no patience
for buyers, sellers,
10
00:00:41,476 --> 00:00:43,478
or parking meter
quarter needers.
11
00:00:43,652 --> 00:00:46,176
I didn't drag this wagon
full of garbage
12
00:00:46,350 --> 00:00:48,178
to be yelled at
by a talking circle!

2. 13
00:00:48,352 --> 00:00:50,180
Ouch. Yes. Well, touché.
14
00:00:50,354 --> 00:00:52,008
Listen up, super size.
15
00:00:52,182 --> 00:00:53,705
I want to get rid
of Seymour's toys
16
00:00:53,879 --> 00:00:55,229
before he turns 60.
17
00:00:55,403 --> 00:00:58,623
Oh, let's see, nothing of value,
nothing of val...
18
00:00:58,797 --> 00:01:00,190
Wait a minute.
19
00:01:00,364 --> 00:01:02,497
Oh, my God, this is why I nerd.
20
00:01:02,671 --> 00:01:05,021
Yes! An original
Radioactive Man doll.
21
00:01:05,195 --> 00:01:06,718
Hmm, mint in box too.
22
00:01:06,892 --> 00:01:09,939
Yes, I may have occasionally
seen one of these.
23
00:01:10,113 --> 00:01:11,810
In my dreams!
24
00:01:11,984 --> 00:01:14,813
Yes, excuse me
just for one moment.
25

3. 00:01:16,989 --> 00:01:19,818
I might make money!
26
00:01:19,992 --> 00:01:22,473
Hulk smash! Hulk smash!
27
00:01:23,953 --> 00:01:27,043
Three, two, sold!
28
00:01:27,217 --> 00:01:30,525
At last, I can afford
a trip to Comicalooza.
29
00:01:30,699 --> 00:01:33,702
Oh, but not enough money
for my wife.
30
00:01:36,183 --> 00:01:37,923
Oh, what luck.
And the first chance to wear
31
00:01:38,098 --> 00:01:41,579
my Doctor Octopus costume
since my uncle's funeral.
32
00:01:41,753 --> 00:01:44,539
It is happening!
33
00:01:59,380 --> 00:02:00,859
Do you still have it?
Do you?
34
00:02:01,033 --> 00:02:02,557
I'm afraid not.
35
00:02:02,731 --> 00:02:04,515
It's on its way
to a lucky collector
36
00:02:04,689 --> 00:02:06,561
who will enjoy not opening it.
37

4. 00:02:06,735 --> 00:02:09,041
- So sorry.
- Damn you, Mother.
38
00:02:09,216 --> 00:02:10,536
I haven't been
this angry with you
39
00:02:10,565 --> 00:02:12,262
since you enlisted me
in the Marines.
40
00:02:12,436 --> 00:02:15,874
Your draft number was too high.
The suspense was killing me.
41
00:02:25,406 --> 00:02:27,712
Who's the new guy?
42
00:02:30,802 --> 00:02:32,717
A saxophone.
43
00:02:32,891 --> 00:02:35,067
I wouldn't kick him
out of the library
44
00:02:35,242 --> 00:02:36,852
for ignoring my shush.
45
00:02:37,026 --> 00:02:38,767
Could he be any cooler?
46
00:02:41,117 --> 00:02:43,250
Oh, I'm gushing in the key of
47
00:02:43,424 --> 00:02:44,903
E...!
48
00:02:46,775 --> 00:02:48,559
Okay, don't gaze at his eyes.
49
00:02:48,733 --> 00:02:50,779

5. Don't stare at his smile.
50
00:02:50,953 --> 00:02:52,607
Don't talk out loud.
51
00:02:52,781 --> 00:02:54,783
You know, I can hear you.
52
00:02:54,957 --> 00:02:56,480
Settle, children, settle.
53
00:02:56,654 --> 00:02:58,134
First, we have
a new band member.
54
00:02:58,308 --> 00:03:00,136
Blake, raise your hand.
55
00:03:01,081 --> 00:03:03,866
Second, we're having
a chair challenge tomorrow.
56
00:03:04,040 --> 00:03:06,390
Lisa Simpson will be playing
to retain her seat.
57
00:03:06,564 --> 00:03:08,566
Your challenger is Blake.
58
00:03:08,740 --> 00:03:11,091
Full disclosure,
I'm pretty good.
59
00:03:11,265 --> 00:03:13,199
Well, I'm happy, 'cause
whether I beat you or not,
60
00:03:13,223 --> 00:03:15,834
I'll get to sit next to you.
61
00:03:16,008 --> 00:03:18,837
Stop with the blue eyes,

6. will you?
62
00:03:19,011 --> 00:03:21,188
Less meet-cute, more toot-toot.
63
00:03:25,017 --> 00:03:26,671
Great. Now, keep playing.
64
00:03:26,845 --> 00:03:29,085
I have a very important meeting
in the instrument closet.
65
00:03:31,502 --> 00:03:34,026
CBD gummies, take me away.
66
00:03:42,078 --> 00:03:45,013
You come to me on the hay
of my daughter's bedding
67
00:03:45,037 --> 00:03:48,084
and make me an ostrich
I can't refuse.
68
00:03:48,258 --> 00:03:49,564
Who are you?
69
00:03:49,738 --> 00:03:50,738
I'm Phil,
70
00:03:50,869 --> 00:03:52,262
filling in for Comic Book Guy.
71
00:03:52,436 --> 00:03:53,761
Also known as
72
00:03:53,785 --> 00:03:56,179
the Snark Knight
and Mean Lantern.
73
00:03:56,353 --> 00:03:58,138
Stop being weird.

7. 74
00:03:58,312 --> 00:04:00,420
I'm not being weird.
I'm a voice-over artist.
75
00:04:00,444 --> 00:04:02,272
I do voices for
your favorite cartoons.
76
00:04:02,446 --> 00:04:04,013
Like Itchy the mouse.
77
00:04:05,754 --> 00:04:08,887
I never dreamed
real people did those voices.
78
00:04:09,061 --> 00:04:11,107
I'm a little embarrassed
to say this,
79
00:04:11,281 --> 00:04:13,762
but I do voices too.
80
00:04:13,936 --> 00:04:16,373
- Like who?
- Like this kid Nelson.
81
00:04:16,547 --> 00:04:18,375
You don't know him,
but he's all...
82
00:04:18,549 --> 00:04:19,700
Haw-haw,
83
00:04:19,724 --> 00:04:21,639
and, smell you later.
84
00:04:21,813 --> 00:04:23,728
Haw-haw!
85
00:04:23,902 --> 00:04:25,730
Smell you later.

8. 86
00:04:25,904 --> 00:04:27,384
Hey, you're pretty good.
87
00:04:27,558 --> 00:04:29,430
And I do an awesome
Todd Flanders,
88
00:04:29,604 --> 00:04:31,204
but it's not worth
meeting Todd Flanders.
89
00:04:31,345 --> 00:04:33,434
- Do some more.
- Well, how about...
90
00:04:33,608 --> 00:04:35,934
that guy from
Back to the Future.
91
00:04:35,958 --> 00:04:39,309
Kid, we've got to help
your parents have sex.
92
00:04:39,483 --> 00:04:41,113
- Do another.
- All right.
93
00:04:41,137 --> 00:04:44,140
I'll do Michael bloody Caine,
if you don't mind.
94
00:04:44,314 --> 00:04:46,447
If you want to live
in my cider house,
95
00:04:46,621 --> 00:04:48,840
there are some rules!
96
00:04:49,014 --> 00:04:53,149
Wow, if I knew who that was,
I would be even more impressed.
97

9. 00:04:55,847 --> 00:04:58,633
Do you ever worry
that Lisa tries too hard
98
00:04:58,807 --> 00:05:00,809
and Bart doesn't try enough?
99
00:05:00,983 --> 00:05:02,463
Marge, you know our deal.
100
00:05:02,637 --> 00:05:04,943
We don't mention the kids
after 7:00.
101
00:05:05,117 --> 00:05:06,510
Where is Bart anyway?
102
00:05:06,684 --> 00:05:08,469
He should have been home by now.
103
00:05:08,643 --> 00:05:10,055
Can you call him?
I've got to get started
104
00:05:10,079 --> 00:05:11,863
on second dinner.
105
00:05:12,037 --> 00:05:13,778
Boy, where are you?
106
00:05:13,952 --> 00:05:15,171
I'm hanging with a stranger.
107
00:05:15,345 --> 00:05:17,869
He's got so many
different personalities.
108
00:05:18,043 --> 00:05:19,828
Oh, will you be home
before dark, yes or no?
109
00:05:20,002 --> 00:05:21,525

10. What am I, a Magic 8-Ball?
110
00:05:21,699 --> 00:05:23,092
Sounds great.
111
00:05:23,266 --> 00:05:26,008
Looks like all of us
are living the dream.
112
00:05:51,076 --> 00:05:53,490
Folks, we'll be landing
in San Diego soon.
113
00:05:53,514 --> 00:05:55,864
On the right side you can see
the Pacific Ocean,
114
00:05:56,038 --> 00:05:59,041
and on the left, I think
there's Superman flying
115
00:05:59,215 --> 00:06:00,347
right behind us.
116
00:06:00,521 --> 00:06:04,481
Oh, don't patronize us, please.
117
00:06:08,920 --> 00:06:12,272
- Working on questions to ask at the panels?
- Yes.
118
00:06:12,446 --> 00:06:15,927
Well, I've been going since '75.
Seen it all.
119
00:06:16,101 --> 00:06:19,888
Adam West in shorts, a line
to meet Brendan Fraser.
120
00:06:20,062 --> 00:06:22,630
But you know the most amazing
thing I ever saw?

11. 121
00:06:22,804 --> 00:06:26,851
- What?
- Once, a guy asked a question so good,
122
00:06:27,025 --> 00:06:29,767
he got a job with Marvel
on the spot.
123
00:06:29,941 --> 00:06:32,030
Ooh, me write for Marvel?
124
00:06:32,204 --> 00:06:33,924
Be a part of the committee
that would decide
125
00:06:34,076 --> 00:06:35,860
the fate of the Avengers?
126
00:06:36,034 --> 00:06:38,123
Then people like me
could make fun of me.
127
00:06:38,298 --> 00:06:40,474
But those ain't gonna
cut it, fanboy.
128
00:06:40,648 --> 00:06:44,042
Then I will write
the best question ever.
129
00:06:44,216 --> 00:06:46,088
Was he real or...
130
00:06:46,262 --> 00:06:47,872
Of course I'm real,
and a real person
131
00:06:48,046 --> 00:06:50,571
should never be booked
between you and this guy.
132
00:06:50,745 --> 00:06:52,224

12. I am Groot.
133
00:06:52,399 --> 00:06:53,878
Kosher meal for Steve Fishbein.
134
00:06:54,052 --> 00:06:55,227
I am Steve Fishbein.
135
00:06:58,584 --> 00:07:01,886
Comicalooza, even more glorious
than I dreamed.
136
00:07:06,282 --> 00:07:09,503
I should not have done that.
Very stupid.
137
00:07:09,677 --> 00:07:12,941
Every man a Batman,
every woman a Harley Quinn.
138
00:07:17,119 --> 00:07:20,514
The chance to rub elbows
with the who's who of Dr. Who.
139
00:07:20,688 --> 00:07:23,908
And to ride an escalator
next to Ant-Man Paul Rudd!
140
00:07:24,082 --> 00:07:26,084
You are Ant-Man Paul Rudd.
141
00:07:26,258 --> 00:07:30,611
Oh, God, I hate my
approachable everyman looks.
142
00:07:30,785 --> 00:07:32,961
Yes, a question, please,
from someone who is
143
00:07:33,135 --> 00:07:34,441
still willing to become a fan.
144

13. 00:07:34,615 --> 00:07:36,486
If you had access
to an Avengers-style
145
00:07:36,660 --> 00:07:38,967
quantum time loop,
would you go back in time
146
00:07:39,141 --> 00:07:41,665
and not be in
Dinner for Schmucks?
147
00:07:41,839 --> 00:07:43,232
Activate VIP pass.
148
00:07:45,321 --> 00:07:47,628
For two seconds I saw
inside the VIP room.
149
00:07:47,802 --> 00:07:49,630
I saw Jon Favreau
sniffing hummus
150
00:07:49,804 --> 00:07:51,283
to see if it was still good.
151
00:07:51,458 --> 00:07:54,461
Time for a celebratory pretzel.
152
00:07:55,984 --> 00:07:57,115
Rib-it, rib-it.
153
00:07:57,289 --> 00:07:59,291
Who are you?
154
00:07:59,466 --> 00:08:01,337
Boba Fett on a job interview.
155
00:08:01,511 --> 00:08:04,427
Well, begone. I'm writing
the perfect panel question.
156

14. 00:08:04,601 --> 00:08:06,429
Get out of here.
157
00:08:08,518 --> 00:08:10,215
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God, I have it.
158
00:08:18,659 --> 00:08:20,008
I will work for Marvel,
159
00:08:20,182 --> 00:08:22,967
and they will finally
be successful.
160
00:08:23,141 --> 00:08:24,839
Hey, good question.
161
00:08:25,013 --> 00:08:26,318
Thank you, Professor X.
162
00:08:26,493 --> 00:08:28,146
I'm not Professor X.
163
00:08:28,320 --> 00:08:30,671
I am just a bald man
in a wheelchair
164
00:08:30,845 --> 00:08:33,674
searching for his child.
165
00:08:33,848 --> 00:08:36,198
- Hey, Lisa.
- Oh, hey, Blake.
166
00:08:36,372 --> 00:08:38,896
This is where I eat
when I want to be alone.
167
00:08:39,070 --> 00:08:40,768
I don't want
to be alone, though.
168

15. 00:08:40,942 --> 00:08:44,162
Want to share wasabi peas?
They're really dry.
169
00:08:44,336 --> 00:08:45,337
Are you a veggie?
170
00:08:45,512 --> 00:08:47,209
- Yes, I am.
- Me too.
171
00:08:47,383 --> 00:08:51,213
This is a BLT,
bread, lettuce and tomato.
172
00:08:51,387 --> 00:08:53,650
Hey, quit talking
to my girlfriend.
173
00:08:53,824 --> 00:08:56,000
I am not your girlfriend.
174
00:08:56,174 --> 00:08:57,741
Right, right.
We're focused on
175
00:08:57,915 --> 00:09:00,178
career days and homework
right now.
176
00:09:00,352 --> 00:09:03,225
- But love has a way of...
- Get away from me.
177
00:09:03,399 --> 00:09:07,011
Oh, my God, Lisa,
we've become my parents.
178
00:09:07,185 --> 00:09:09,840
Well, I just wanted to
wish you good luck and...
179
00:09:33,908 --> 00:09:37,520

16. Ah, my favorite sound, silence.
180
00:09:37,694 --> 00:09:39,914
See ya.
181
00:09:57,975 --> 00:10:00,412
Okay, a little bigger
than I thought.
182
00:10:00,587 --> 00:10:03,111
Oh, boy, it's like
Burning Man for nerds, although
183
00:10:03,285 --> 00:10:06,114
to be fair, Burning Man is also
Burning Man for nerds.
184
00:10:06,288 --> 00:10:08,072
Man, there's a lot of nerds.
185
00:10:08,246 --> 00:10:09,900
Hello, Hall H.
186
00:10:10,074 --> 00:10:13,425
Let's let out a roar
they can hear in Asgard.
187
00:10:13,600 --> 00:10:15,776
Question, isn't sound
to Asgard blocked
188
00:10:15,950 --> 00:10:17,386
by the vacuum of space?
189
00:10:17,560 --> 00:10:20,607
Actually, sound is transmitted
by Yggdrasil,
190
00:10:20,781 --> 00:10:22,913
the tree that connects the
nine worlds of the cosmos.
191

17. 00:10:23,087 --> 00:10:24,456
But transmission doesn't
come into it.
192
00:10:24,480 --> 00:10:26,003
This has never not been true.
193
00:10:26,177 --> 00:10:29,267
Have you ever read Thor?
194
00:10:29,441 --> 00:10:32,009
Wha... What?
195
00:10:32,183 --> 00:10:34,795
We have some of the greatest
creators in the industry here.
196
00:10:34,969 --> 00:10:37,972
Daniel Kim, Zoe Burwell,
197
00:10:38,146 --> 00:10:39,843
and David Z. Cohen!
198
00:10:43,151 --> 00:10:44,824
Oh, my God, oh, my God,
oh, my God, oh, my God!
199
00:10:44,848 --> 00:10:47,111
I've been blocked on Twitter
by all of them.
200
00:10:47,285 --> 00:10:51,507
And now it's time for...
audience questions.
201
00:10:54,989 --> 00:10:56,381
Yes. Third position.
202
00:10:56,556 --> 00:10:58,470
Time to prepare.
And just two steps to the mic.
203

18. 00:10:58,645 --> 00:11:00,081
It's perfect.
204
00:11:00,255 --> 00:11:02,953
I'd like to ask,
how would someone like me
205
00:11:03,127 --> 00:11:06,000
get someone like you
to look at my work?
206
00:11:06,174 --> 00:11:07,349
I'll look at your work.
207
00:11:07,523 --> 00:11:10,004
Actually, I don't...
208
00:11:10,178 --> 00:11:12,833
I don't have any work, per se.
209
00:11:13,007 --> 00:11:14,835
Next.
210
00:11:15,009 --> 00:11:16,663
Closer to me. Closer to me.
211
00:11:20,057 --> 00:11:21,842
Isn't it true
that Superman represented
212
00:11:22,016 --> 00:11:24,845
the subconscious desire
of creators Jerry Siegel
213
00:11:25,019 --> 00:11:29,066
and Joe Shuster to defeat
the Nazi menace in 1938?
214
00:11:31,155 --> 00:11:32,715
I have never heard
a question that good.
215

19. 00:11:35,377 --> 00:11:36,813
Oh, yes, yes, good question.
216
00:11:36,987 --> 00:11:39,860
And I believe the answer
is a-doy.
217
00:11:40,034 --> 00:11:43,515
And now for the query
that will blow them away.
218
00:11:43,690 --> 00:11:45,605
Where's my question?
219
00:11:45,779 --> 00:11:47,563
Did I use it as a napkin?
220
00:11:47,737 --> 00:11:50,087
No, I never use a napkin.
Where is it?
221
00:11:50,261 --> 00:11:52,524
Next!
222
00:11:52,699 --> 00:11:54,744
Yes, my question is...
223
00:11:54,918 --> 00:11:57,312
Okay, I forgot my question.
224
00:11:57,486 --> 00:12:00,228
Worst question ever.
225
00:12:00,402 --> 00:12:02,709
No!
226
00:12:02,883 --> 00:12:04,885
Welcome to Marvel.
227
00:12:05,059 --> 00:12:07,104
No.

20. 228
00:12:07,278 --> 00:12:09,890
We could offer you a job at DC.
229
00:12:10,064 --> 00:12:11,805
Yes, hard pass.
230
00:12:11,979 --> 00:12:14,546
Just when I thought this
day could not get any worse.
231
00:12:16,592 --> 00:12:20,465
Okay, the day you've been
waiting for, chair challenges.
232
00:12:20,640 --> 00:12:23,599
We begin with Ralph
challenging for first triangle.
233
00:12:24,731 --> 00:12:27,081
I'm halfway through.
234
00:12:27,255 --> 00:12:30,780
Once again, first triangle
will be an empty chair.
235
00:12:30,954 --> 00:12:32,913
The better chair won.
236
00:12:33,087 --> 00:12:35,785
Now, for first saxophone,
Lisa Simpson.
237
00:12:35,959 --> 00:12:38,440
Hey, vegetarian,
I soaked your reed
238
00:12:38,614 --> 00:12:39,746
in hot dog water.
239
00:12:43,358 --> 00:12:45,795
Terrible. Blake?

21. 240
00:12:45,969 --> 00:12:48,450
Terrible, but better.
241
00:12:48,624 --> 00:12:50,278
You're first chair.
242
00:12:50,452 --> 00:12:52,933
You were playing me
the whole time.
243
00:12:55,065 --> 00:12:57,067
Don't you walk away from me.
244
00:12:57,241 --> 00:12:59,766
Well, very soon,
I will outplay you,
245
00:12:59,940 --> 00:13:01,942
my blues will be blue-ier,
246
00:13:02,116 --> 00:13:03,944
my Baker Street
will be more baked,
247
00:13:04,118 --> 00:13:05,902
and I will get my chair back.
248
00:13:06,076 --> 00:13:08,470
It may not be today,
or tomorrow,
249
00:13:08,644 --> 00:13:10,820
because tomorrow
we have a field trip,
250
00:13:10,994 --> 00:13:13,954
or two days after that
because that's...
251
00:13:14,128 --> 00:13:17,305
that's no school,
but on the 11th.

22. 252
00:13:17,479 --> 00:13:19,916
Yeah, the 11th,
it's mine, buddy.
253
00:13:20,090 --> 00:13:21,309
That's the science fair.
254
00:13:21,483 --> 00:13:23,441
Thanks for reminding me!
255
00:13:26,444 --> 00:13:29,273
Okay, audition for King
of Cookie Castle, take one.
256
00:13:29,447 --> 00:13:31,841
Okay, you got this, Phil.
Book it, book it good.
257
00:13:32,015 --> 00:13:34,365
- We ready?
- Off with their heads.
258
00:13:34,539 --> 00:13:35,976
Off with their feet.
259
00:13:36,150 --> 00:13:39,022
Grind the rest
into a sugary treat.
260
00:13:39,196 --> 00:13:41,329
Beautiful, you got the part.
261
00:13:41,503 --> 00:13:43,810
Beautiful, you got the fart.
262
00:13:43,984 --> 00:13:46,203
Hey, the kid's not bad.
263
00:13:46,377 --> 00:13:47,988
We might have
a part for him too.

23. 264
00:13:48,162 --> 00:13:51,339
And if he improvises like that,
I can fire the writers.
265
00:13:51,513 --> 00:13:52,949
Read this, kid.
266
00:13:53,994 --> 00:13:55,865
Eat my tights.
267
00:13:56,039 --> 00:13:57,519
You're hired.
268
00:13:57,693 --> 00:14:00,522
Who knew it was so easy
to become a working actor?
269
00:14:02,393 --> 00:14:04,874
Okay, everyone say one thing
they did today.
270
00:14:05,048 --> 00:14:06,223
I'll start.
271
00:14:06,397 --> 00:14:08,312
I lost my half-cup
measuring cup,
272
00:14:08,486 --> 00:14:09,879
so I used two quarter cups.
273
00:14:10,053 --> 00:14:11,707
Crisis averted.
274
00:14:11,881 --> 00:14:13,990
I booked a voice-over job,
and the show airs tomorrow.
275
00:14:14,014 --> 00:14:16,016
I thought animation
took nine months.

24. 276
00:14:16,190 --> 00:14:18,496
No, you can do any cartoon
in a day.
277
00:14:18,670 --> 00:14:21,543
Anyone who takes longer is just
trying to bleed the studio dry.
278
00:14:21,717 --> 00:14:23,980
And this is what
they're paying me.
279
00:14:24,154 --> 00:14:25,721
That's baloney.
280
00:14:25,895 --> 00:14:27,810
Anybody could fake
a check from...
281
00:14:27,984 --> 00:14:30,160
Warner Bros. Animation.
282
00:14:30,334 --> 00:14:31,901
No, it's legit.
283
00:14:32,075 --> 00:14:34,861
I made more in a minute
than you do in a month, fatso.
284
00:14:35,035 --> 00:14:36,776
Why, you little...
285
00:14:36,950 --> 00:14:38,647
Keep your hands
off the moneymaker.
286
00:14:38,821 --> 00:14:40,059
And don't look me in the voice.
287
00:14:40,083 --> 00:14:43,434
Lisa, how was your day?

25. 288
00:14:43,608 --> 00:14:45,872
Well, my life is in ruin,
289
00:14:46,046 --> 00:14:48,875
and I'm trying to think of some
possible plan to rescue myself.
290
00:14:49,049 --> 00:14:50,441
Plans are fine,
291
00:14:50,615 --> 00:14:53,357
but never underestimate
the power of giving up.
292
00:14:53,531 --> 00:14:57,100
Because if you think about it,
see, spontan...
293
00:14:57,274 --> 00:14:58,754
Forget it.
294
00:14:58,928 --> 00:15:01,409
Coming up, Cookie Castle,
295
00:15:01,583 --> 00:15:03,585
introducing Bart Simpson.
296
00:15:03,759 --> 00:15:06,240
Oh, I still think
we all could have fit.
297
00:15:06,414 --> 00:15:07,719
Now get a good look.
298
00:15:07,894 --> 00:15:09,678
This is your last chance
to see normal Bart
299
00:15:09,852 --> 00:15:12,463
before I become a star.

26. 300
00:15:12,637 --> 00:15:15,249
Then I'll be the guy who sells
you out with a tell-all book.
301
00:15:15,423 --> 00:15:16,903
Boo-yeah.
302
00:15:23,561 --> 00:15:24,954
Yeah, go, Bart.
303
00:15:25,128 --> 00:15:27,783
You got the "and" credit.
304
00:15:27,957 --> 00:15:31,961
I negotiated that, in lieu
of having a teacher on set. Bam.
305
00:15:35,922 --> 00:15:40,100
I kneel before you, Jules.
306
00:15:40,274 --> 00:15:41,928
Rise, sir knight,
307
00:15:42,102 --> 00:15:45,061
and kiss the gentle hand
of your sovereign.
308
00:15:45,235 --> 00:15:46,628
You play a girl?
309
00:15:46,802 --> 00:15:47,977
Come on.
310
00:15:48,151 --> 00:15:50,414
They didn't tell me that.
311
00:15:50,588 --> 00:15:52,677
My place is in the scullery.
312
00:15:52,852 --> 00:15:56,812
I thought "scullery"

27. was where they kept the skulls.
313
00:15:56,986 --> 00:16:00,337
Bart plays a girl,
Bart plays a girl.
314
00:16:00,511 --> 00:16:02,949
And his accent's inconsistent.
315
00:16:20,270 --> 00:16:21,793
Bart?
316
00:16:21,968 --> 00:16:22,969
Go away.
317
00:16:23,143 --> 00:16:25,232
No, I'm not gonna tease you.
318
00:16:25,406 --> 00:16:28,322
I'm proud that my brother isn't
bound by gender stereotypes
319
00:16:28,496 --> 00:16:30,977
or heteronormative thinking.
320
00:16:31,151 --> 00:16:33,370
I hate the way
your generation talks.
321
00:16:33,544 --> 00:16:35,198
I have something to tell you.
322
00:16:35,372 --> 00:16:37,984
Oh, don't tell me I'm nominated
for an Annie Award.
323
00:16:38,158 --> 00:16:41,161
- Those things are worthless.
- Much more important.
324
00:16:41,335 --> 00:16:43,554
For my problem,

28. there's no answer.
325
00:16:43,728 --> 00:16:47,384
But what you're doing is brave,
and it's a little dangerous,
326
00:16:47,558 --> 00:16:48,777
and you should be proud.
327
00:16:48,951 --> 00:16:49,951
Really?
328
00:16:50,039 --> 00:16:51,693
That's right, my friend.
329
00:16:51,867 --> 00:16:54,565
You should walk into school
with your head held high.
330
00:16:54,739 --> 00:16:56,741
All right, I will.
331
00:16:56,916 --> 00:16:59,179
Hey, everyone,
I'm Princess Jules
332
00:16:59,353 --> 00:17:01,050
and I'm proud.
333
00:17:01,224 --> 00:17:02,486
One question.
334
00:17:02,660 --> 00:17:05,315
Do you identify
as him or her?
335
00:17:05,489 --> 00:17:07,013
- Him.
- Get him!
336
00:17:11,539 --> 00:17:14,934
You're not

29. gonna yell at me?
337
00:17:15,108 --> 00:17:18,372
No. I have lost my will
to berate.
338
00:17:18,546 --> 00:17:19,982
I'm sorry.
339
00:17:20,156 --> 00:17:23,029
Ralph Wiggum feels sorry for me.
340
00:17:23,203 --> 00:17:25,553
And farther still do I fall.
341
00:17:25,727 --> 00:17:27,903
This will be here for me later.
342
00:17:28,077 --> 00:17:31,385
Leave me alone.
Get out of here, you stupid kid.
343
00:17:31,559 --> 00:17:33,561
You're like a Gollum
with worse hair,
344
00:17:33,735 --> 00:17:36,085
a subcommittee meeting
of the Galactic Senate,
345
00:17:36,259 --> 00:17:39,828
a Spider-Man drawn
by John Romita Jr. Jr.
346
00:17:40,002 --> 00:17:42,352
You fixed me.
347
00:17:42,526 --> 00:17:45,312
You fixed me.
348
00:17:47,183 --> 00:17:49,229
Let's see, where could I move?

30. 349
00:17:49,403 --> 00:17:52,319
Toluca Lake.
Lot of voice-over work there.
350
00:17:52,493 --> 00:17:54,712
It would be nice
to fly in and out of Burbank.
351
00:17:56,279 --> 00:17:57,933
Bart, turn on your show.
352
00:17:58,107 --> 00:17:59,935
You mean the show
that ruined my life?
353
00:18:00,109 --> 00:18:02,938
Just turn it on.
You're not a princess anymore.
354
00:18:03,112 --> 00:18:05,027
You're a queen.
355
00:18:05,201 --> 00:18:06,724
Majesty,
356
00:18:06,898 --> 00:18:09,901
the royal unicorn is waiting
for your dainty bottom.
357
00:18:10,076 --> 00:18:11,468
Aw, geez.
358
00:18:20,086 --> 00:18:23,306
Who knew a princess
could be badass?
359
00:18:23,480 --> 00:18:25,961
I'm gonna get a Queen Bart
action figure.
360
00:18:26,135 --> 00:18:29,269

31. The unicorn's killed
every adult in sight.
361
00:18:44,980 --> 00:18:47,939
From now on, hands off Bart.
362
00:18:48,940 --> 00:18:50,464
What about me?
363
00:18:50,638 --> 00:18:53,467
I like the bullying.
It's a form of attention.
364
00:18:53,641 --> 00:18:56,426
Also, hands off Milhouse.
365
00:18:56,600 --> 00:18:57,906
No.
366
00:18:58,080 --> 00:18:59,734
Well,
367
00:18:59,908 --> 00:19:03,172
I can't play to my abilities
or in a stupid first chair,
368
00:19:03,346 --> 00:19:05,957
but I can still just play
for the fun of it.
369
00:19:06,132 --> 00:19:08,221
Beat it. This is our turf.
370
00:19:34,334 --> 00:19:35,813
Free pretzel?
371
00:19:35,987 --> 00:19:37,989
The greatest award
I've ever won.
372
00:19:41,167 --> 00:19:42,733
Still up there.

32. 373
00:19:42,907 --> 00:19:45,649
Although Dad ate
the original pretzel.
374
00:19:45,823 --> 00:19:47,825
Stick it on the tray.
375
00:19:47,999 --> 00:19:49,131
No.
376
00:19:51,875 --> 00:19:55,107
I'm addicted
to playing for free.
377
00:19:55,182 --> 00:19:58,575
Which is the least dangerous
addiction a musician can have.
378
00:20:05,365 --> 00:20:07,323
I want to like it. I just don't.
379
00:20:15,636 --> 00:20:18,378
If you could go back in time
and not make one Hulk movie,
380
00:20:18,552 --> 00:20:22,556
which would it be and why?
381
00:20:22,730 --> 00:20:23,948
The most popular superheroes
382
00:20:24,123 --> 00:20:25,403
are Superman, Batman,
Spider-Man,
383
00:20:25,515 --> 00:20:29,911
so I propose creating
SuperSpiderBat.
384
00:20:30,085 --> 00:20:32,914
Why do people who see Superman

33. first think it's a bird?
385
00:20:33,088 --> 00:20:35,395
And why do they feel
the need to say it out loud?
386
00:20:35,569 --> 00:20:38,920
Look, it's a bird.
I mean, who says that?
387
00:20:44,752 --> 00:20:47,320
<i>Any note you can reach,
I can go higher</i>
388
00:20:47,494 --> 00:20:50,018
<i>I can sing anything
higher than you</i>
389
00:20:50,192 --> 00:20:52,673
<i>- No, you can't, no, you can't
- Yes, I can</i>
390
00:20:52,847 --> 00:20:55,371
<i>- Yes, I can, yes, I can
- No, you can't</i>
391
00:20:55,545 --> 00:20:58,026
<i>- No, you can't, no, you can't
- Yes, I can</i>
392
00:20:58,200 --> 00:21:00,681
<i>- Yes, I can, yes, I can
- No, you can't</i>
393
00:21:00,855 --> 00:21:03,379
<i>- No, you can't, no, you can't
- Yes, I can</i>
394
00:21:03,553 --> 00:21:06,034
<i>- Yes, I can, yes, I can
- No, you can't</i>
395
00:21:06,208 --> 00:21:08,689

34. <i>- No, you can't, no, you can't
- Yes, I can</i>
396
00:21:08,863 --> 00:21:11,170
<i>- Yes, I can, yes, I can
- No, you can't</i>
397
00:21:11,344 --> 00:21:13,259
<i>No, you can't</i>
398
00:21:13,825 --> 00:21:16,265
All right, I can't.
Big whoop.