The author discusses how she frequently does activities like eating out, shopping, and going to movies alone because it is more convenient and she enjoys her own company. However, she notes that she often receives judgmental looks and questions about whether anyone is joining her. In contrast, her male friends report facing less scrutiny for doing things alone. The author argues that women are still seen as less independent than men and criticizes the double standard where doing things independently is seen more negatively for women.

1. 5/23/16, 3:30 PMWhy does everyone judge me for doing things by myself?
Page 1 of 10http://thetab.com/us/2016/05/23/everyone-judge-things-6404
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Why does everyone judge me for doing things by
myself?
2 hours ago • Kelsey Knepler
Stop asking me if anyone will be joining me
As a busy person, I frequently find myself doing things alone. It’s a lot easier to grab a meal by myself and
get to where I need to be, yet still take the time to properly enjoy my small breaks that I do get. And yes, this
includes going to a sit-down restaurant alone because I do not always have somewhere to take my food to go.
Why should I be forced to when there is a perfectly comfortable dining room at the restaurant?
Apart from it just being easier, believe it or not, I often CHOOSE to go places by myself. Things like
shopping and eating are meant to be enjoyable and sometimes keeping a conversation going or deciding what
you want to buy adds pressure when you are with another person.
When I am by myself, I can buy that abstract print crop top that I fell in love with even if it is kind of out
there (I’m not the type to put it back anyways, but sometimes I’m just not in the mood to explain my decision
making). I agree that with shopping it can be nice to have a second opinion but other days I just want to get
what I want and move at my own pace.
Roisin Lanigan, Katrina Margolis and
2,201 others like this.
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2. 5/23/16, 3:30 PMWhy does everyone judge me for doing things by myself?
Page 2 of 10http://thetab.com/us/2016/05/23/everyone-judge-things-6404
Another example is movies, considering you don’t talk in them anyways, I do not get what is so wrong about
going alone. Being alone also gives me time to slow down and clear my head, which is refreshing during my
super booked days. Going somewhere with another person or group of people requires for a median pace to
be met and sometimes I just want to go faster or slower than usual, which is perfectly acceptable by myself.
Despite these seemingly obvious reasons, I cannot tell you how many judging looks and times I have been
asked something along the lines of “is anyone meeting you?” However, when I asked some of my guy friends

3. 5/23/16, 3:30 PMWhy does everyone judge me for doing things by myself?
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about their experiences going and doing activities alone, less than half of them reported any difference in how
they were treated.
So why does this difference exist? Does anyone remember the Friends episode where Rachel struggles to eat
alone and the guys call her a “freak” for it? That episode aired in 1997, which is almost 20 years ago. How is
it possible that in 2016 women are still not considered independent enough to do things alone?
As an only child, I have become used to doing things alone and have never really thought anything of it when
others do, which is why receiving some of these negative responses has been a surprise to me.

4. 5/23/16, 3:30 PMWhy does everyone judge me for doing things by myself?
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To be honest, I think eating by yourself is completely liberating. It shows that you are confident and secure
with who you are and that you are capable of enjoying your own company. It does not mean that you hate
people, it just means that you find pleasure in your own company as well. So if that is something to be
frowned on, judge away but I encourage you all to try it before you knock it.
@kelseyknepler

5. 5/23/16, 3:30 PMWhy does everyone judge me for doing things by myself?
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