A nursing exemplar I wrote in Sep 2013 describing a time when I stepped in to support a coworker experiencing crisis.

1. Hanfei Luo 09-05-2013
Nursing exemplar: Being a sentry for a colleague in crisis
A few weeks ago, I was leaving the OR locker room and walking through the semi-
isolated corridor toward the OR lounge to eat lunch, when I noticed a lonely figure sitting
silently in the quiet corridor against the wall. I recognized her as one colleague in the SPD
(sterile processing department). She saw me, quickly said hi as I said hi, before being absorbed
in her thoughts again. I walked past, but felt something wasn’t right as I detected a hint of sorrow
in her eyes when she looked at me. I stopped, turned around, and asked her how she was. She
tried to assure me that she was okay with a sad smile, but I could see more clearly that she was
disturbed. I stayed, not willing to leave her alone. She paused for a moment before making a
simple request: may I hold her hand? I held her hand, and sat down right next to her.
She began telling her story. It wasn’t easy for me to immediately understand her, as her
narration was somewhat incoherent and her emotional sways were bizarre. Soon I understood
why as I detected a smell of alcohol in her breath: she’d been drinking. On one moment, being
on the verge of breaking down to cry, she told me how she felt that she just can’t do the job and
come in to work since it is just so difficult for her; then on the next moment, being suddenly
cheerful, she told the story of how she successfully communicated with a family in Spanish,
before moving on to a next topic. She seemed to be in desperate need for comfort and support,
but after I told her that I would be there for her always and tried to comfort and support her, she
just brushed me aside and said, “Oh, you are doing what you’re trained to do… nursing.” It was
confusing and hard to keep up with her while she was in a state like this, but I kept my support
and comforting consistent. I held her hand and listened to her intently with full eye-to-eye
contact the whole time to let her know that I truly cared. Although she still brushed me aside a
couple of times, on other moments she expressed genuine gratitude for me being there with her.

2. The colleague and I talked alone for few minutes before we were being noticed by an OR
tech as she walked by. She, too, came forward to offer support, but seeing that our colleague
already felt a little better, she left, and notified the OR manager and a SPD senior worker about
the situation. The OR manager and the senior worker came, and suggested going to an office to
talk in private. The colleague told me to continue to hold her while on the way to the office since
she still needed physical contact, and I obeyed her wishes. After we arrived at the office it was
finally time for me to go. The colleague gave me one last look of gratitude and thanked me once
again for being there for her the whole time. I again reassured her that I would be there for her,
before finally leaving.
I never saw the colleague again after that time, and I don’t know if she would ever come
back. For the time when I was with her, I felt I made the right decision of consistently staying
with her and being there for her, even though I was confused by her unpredictability. I was
determined to be there for her because 1) if I were depressed, my spirit would be immediately
uplifted if someone is simply there for me, 2) she was obviously in no state to work and I wasn’t
sure about the true extent of her negativity and unpredictability, so I kept watching over her to
prevent any possible potential harm. I felt frustrated, however, for not able to understand her as
much as I wished during her incoherent moments. Feeling still like a novice, I observed how the
OR manager was reacting to the situation. True to her characteristic cheerfulness in daily life, the
OR manager still carried a light spirit of cheerfulness the whole time as if she was letting the
positive energy of being cheerful to sooth the colleague’s negative mind, but at the same time
she was as serious as the situation demanded. The OR manager’s ability to be appropriately
serious and casually cheerful at the same time inspires me----maybe I can be more cheerful next
time and not just being only serious, so there may be more sunshine for an overcast mind?